Those Weird Feelings No One Ever Gets
by No More Masquerade
Summary: AU: High School: When you just keep falling in love and falling in love and falling in love to the point of breaking. It's hard to deal with those weird feelings that people just never get. SasuNaru GaaNaru SasuNeji KisaIta SasoDei NejiTen KakaIru Yaoi
1. Jokes

**Those Weird Feeling No One Ever Gets**

AlternateUniverse, high school, Southern California, because that's fun, right?

SasuNaru (and many other various pairings), Shounen-ai/Yaoi. There's no reason it should offend anyone; it's just love, guys.

Teen due to not-socially-accepted language and hints towards sexual intercourse.

The style is kind of whack compared to my regular; there's no use telling me you dislike it, though. If you like what I write and want to see how I write normally nowadays, just email or PM me and I'll find a way to give you a sample.

* * *

_Once upon a time, I kept falling in love . . .  
_

This hadn't happened in a long while.

I'll admit, sometimes I'm faking it, but most of the time I'm in a genuine good mood.

But there I was. Sitting on my couch, staring at the clock as the colon between the numbers flashed for every second, and I'd never felt so down.

My life hasn't been very long, so I don't think I'm exaggerating.

For one who gets sad so little, it's not so hard to suddenly feel sadder than you ever have in your entire life.

Really, I'm trying to outdo myself, though. This can't be the worse I've ever felt.

I mean, I felt really shitty when that three your old ran in front of me at the play ground and I accidentally knocked him over. I was going so fast, I wouldn't be surprised if he was scarred for life. I ran away and hid, crying, so long that my dad didn't find me until the sun was setting.

Of course, I was five and I was on the swing, so it wasn't my fault at all, but . . . I dunno, I still feel bad about it to this day.

And then there was that time Hinata had said, when Sasuke and I were joking about being gay, that her dad would probably be mad if he found out she hung out with homosexuals.

I had said, half joking, that I'd shoot him in the head if he was a jerk-off, homophobic, prejudice, bastard and that, what should he care? Just less people to hit on his daughter.

She slapped me across the back of the head and ran away crying.

I was more surprised that she'd hit me than anything, but I did feel bad, and I've never worked up the nerve to say sorry about it.

Still, when I compare, I still felt worse as I sat on my couch that day after school, and even double worse since thinking about things that make me feel bad was only pushing me closer and closer to the edge of crying again.

Mind, I hadn't cried since I broke my leg in the sixth grade, and that was _after_ the operation, not in front of my entire P.E. class.

Of course, that didn't worsen my mood. Seeing as, after that, Sasuke declared that he would forever give me piggyback rides so he could mess around with my crutches.

He did it too. A whole two months and three weeks. After that, he said that his ten pound back pack never felt lighter.

Nowadays, his backpack has increased to twenty pounds, and he'll complain from time to time. Like he did just about an hour ago, before school let out . . .

"Oi, I'm telling you, my bag was not this heavy when we were walking into literature class. I don't think Miss Yuuhi gives out assignments according to amount or what it's about. She definitely weighs each packet of homework so that each of us carry around at least five more pounds."

I rolled my eyes, but it's hard not to agree.

"You lead me to believe that you set your backpack on a scale every day after school and then record the weight."

He pulled the straps of his backpack and hitched up the great purple sack so he could stand straighter.

"You make it sound like I don't."

And I couldn't help but laugh. I've never met anyone who can stay so serious and so nonchalant about everything in the world and then some but still manage the funniest things. Even when what he says is not that funny, I have to laugh, because he keeps the same tone in his voice, always, no matter what he says, and it seriously cracks me up.

We rounded a corner and were just about to reach Mr. Hatake's door, when a girl strode past us, like we should've been bowing at her feet, and slipped into Mr. Hatake's room.

Sasuke and I exchanged a glance, and we didn't even have to say anything because we both knew that, had we not been about to walk into a class, we'd both have been cracking jokes about the little Princess there, and where are her man servants, and is there an opening, because I'm sure the jock with muscle everywhere but his head would love to take the job.

But we walked in, silent as we had been before we saw Miss Priss pass by.

Still, I had to bite my lip to keep from laughing, and these weird noises came out like I was blowing my nose.

And that damn Sasuke kept his cool, expression as indifferent as some may think he felt on the inside.

But those kids who think they know Sasuke don't have a clue. I don't know one other person beside myself who would have known that, behind those practically blank mirrors of tar Sasuke calls eyes, he was cracking up and giving the girl the finger for stepping on his toe.

It's likely I'm the only person who knew he knew she stepped on his toe, too. And it was obvious she did. Probably because she thought he thinks he's all that, but if he did I doubt he'd hang out with the likes of me, who refuses to acknowledge that he is an absolute god on earth, born to a king, raised in the sewage, and in need of absolute pampering.

Of course, I must admit that, deep down, someone that wasn't me but just lived in my heart, like some kid pretending to me that couldn't even pull off the way I say New Orleans or Caribbean, was just like the rest of the girls in school, who believe they're madly in love with a boy that's never even looked at them.

But I'm different in that sense. At least I know Sasuke. Better than anyone in the world, perhaps, besides Sasuke himself.

We're like brothers. Best friends. I'd even venture so far as to say we're soul mates. We're the perfect match.

Wind on fire. We support each other. We give each other reason to be.

I like it.

I love it.

And that kid in my heart, who wore my clothes and saw what I saw and giggled at things I never understood . . . He loved Sasuke.

And I do too. But in a different sense.

You could say I don't know what that kid meant when he said he loved Sasuke. I love Sasuke because he's my best friend. My best, best friend, whom I couldn't live without, even if I wanted to.

He's not the type of friend that I could move away to Oregon from and get by with calling every day until it's every week, and then every once and a while, until I forget about him.

Naw. I don't care what happens, I'll run away, I'll walk all the way from Oregon to Southern Cali, I'll give my spare kidney, my right arm, and my left thumb if it means I can stay with Sasuke.

But that kid . . . he would always be staring at Sasuke like he wass some kind of exotic artwork on display behind a velvet rope, with the spotlight shining on him. Like there was nothing more important in the world.

It kinda creeps me out.

And it would creep the kid out that I could be so close to Sasuke without choking up.

He was weird . . .

But back to where I was walking through the classroom behind Sasuke, heading towards the back table facing the wall.

The two of us dumped our things underneath the table and plopped down into the chairs and flipped on our computers.

Because that's just what you do when you go to computer class.

And I kicked my feet up on the desk.

Because that's just OK in Mr. Hatake's class.

As my computer screen turned from black to blue with a tiny, swirly, rainbow-y circle telling me to be patient, I felt eyes on me in one of those ways where I don't actually feel the eyes, but I'm just able to tell that it would be a moment in which Sasuke would be looking at me.

Friend instincts, I've call them. A very lame name, but I couldn't think of anything clever and I don't think I ever will.

"What?" I grunted, rolling my head to look at him like it was some kind of nuisance.

He nodded as if I had just asked a yes or no question, but his head was tilted so it was obvious that he was trying to show me something.

And he didn't say a thing, which is unlike him to be bothered with teachers and their rules of keeping quite, specially in this class, where rules don't apply in Sasuke's world.

I turned in my seat and my knee started hurting after only a second of me squishing it against the plastic desk seat.

But my head didn't care because right there, at the front of the class, was Miss Priss, as I've rightfully named her, her chin in her hand, scowling and staring at Sasuke as if he was an expensive necklace behind the glass that Daddy wouldn't get her.

And I could tell what Sasuke was getting at. It was obvious he was a little miffed(1) already because he didn't need another admirer, especially one that obviously only liked him for his face, hair, and pants, but she was clearly giving off vibes that I was in her way or something, and I don't want to say I liked it, despite the fact that I did, but Sasuke's never more protective over anything, not even his tomato plants in his bedroom window, than he is over me.

Man, I just love rubbing that in girls' faces.

"Dude, it's another one . . . " I hissed, glancing back at the girl before turning back to Sasuke. "It's a . . . "

I paused and we had the world's shortest staring contest as we let the suspense and horror build up.

"A Sasuke idiot," and neither of us could understand the last part because we had started laughing too hard about the fact that it was said at the exact same time, which happens often, but never loses its charm, even when what's said is as lame as "Sasuke idiot", but I think you know by now that we're bad at naming things.

"Uchiha, Uzumaki, it's become clear to me that the routine for this class is to start off with you two laughing in the back of the room. Maybe tomorrow we can skip it? Unless you want to sit up front with me, and I'll make sure you're quiet when the bell rings. Sound fun?"

I let my chair drop so it was on all four legs again and said, as I stared down at my keyboard, "No sir."

Like always, Sasuke refused to listen to authority, and I could tell he'd have loved to say something like, 'Nah, I'm fine back here, but if you really want me to stop, I'd be just as happy, if not happier, skipping school. Be sure to mention to the principal that you told me to do it, though.'

Of course, the last time he said something like that, the teacher told him that he could stay home if he'd like, because she'd love to write him up a suspension. It was a nice, thick, drawn out argument that ended in detention.

Not like he wouldn't do it again, but Sasuke does that a lot. It's like he's building up his green cards, spacing out the amount of times he argues with teachers so they don't end up wanting to talk to his parents about his behavior, because who really wants teachers finding out you live alone when you should be staying with some kind of guardian?

"Alright, boys and girls . . . and those two in the back," the class sniggered, glancing back at Sasuke and me, and I ground my teeth angrily, forgetting that it was a joke, and I should have been laughing, but I didn't, "today we're going to continue working on our typing, so bring up your files and get started."

I sighed and pulled the mouse over the mouse pad until the cursor hid several letters of the title of my essay and I double clicked.

Most kids think, whole heartedly, that computer class must be boring, which is why more kids take art instead, but Sasuke and I had agreed that we'd each choose an elective and we wouldn't argue any further, and Sasuke chose computers.

I, too, had thought it would be boring, but it ended up as one of my favorite classes. Mr. Hatake really was a cool teacher, just not when he bossed us around.

But it was clear he liked us, so it didn't bother me. Sasuke, on the other hand, refuses to get aquainted with teachers beyond the teacher pupil level, so, you could say he was missing out.

Even when the school heard that Mr. Hatake's classes were writing essays, that's all they'd comprehend before saying that they'd never take that class and that they felt bad for anyone who had to endure it.

But they never got the chance to hear what we'd be writing about. Which was only the coolest essay assignment ever.

"Just write about what you'd do if you could be in charge of the school for one day. Don't think logically, because that leads to dull writings that no one wants to read. Be creative. I want to hear the impossible. I want to hear exactly what comes to mind without you having to think. Easy as pie."

Yes, those were our guidelines. It was supposed to be typing practice, but I think Mr. Hatake just wanted something more fun to grade than boring essays on the first ten presidents or the standard typing exercises with the timed-typing and that crap.

All benefited from it.

_Then I would buy a go-cart with the school's money. They deserve it since they confiscated mine when I drove it to school in October. Then I'd take Sasuke and we'd drive it through the entire school, through every classroom, especially Miss Yuuhi's. Don't get me wrong, I like her, but I'd just love to run some muddy tires over all her God damn_

"Hey there, Uzumaki, what'd I tell you about language?"

I gasped and my hands twitched off the keyboard, typing several random letters and numbers in the frenzy.

Good lord, I hated it when he just appears out of no where.

"Looks like English to me," said Sasuke, leaning over so his head was practically resting on my shoulder.

That damn kid in my heart was running laps, and out of pure instinct, like he was a fly, I flicked at my chest, but it did no good.

Placing a hand firmly on both of our heads, Mr. Hatake sighed and looked like he wanted to bop Sasuke on the head and tell him to stop being a smart ass, but said, instead, "Change it, and I won't deduct points. Keep your fingers under control from now on, OK?"

He walked away, and I was sure he was going to stop and say, loud enough so the whole class could hear, "And hold your tongue once in a while, Uchiha," but he did nothing of the sort.

"God damn it," Sasuke grumbled, running his fingers through his hair to get it back to it's regular style, "You know he wants to say damn once in a while, in the least. He doesn't have to make us suffer too. Besides, I don't think he'd get so mad if we said 'God send it to hell,' instead. That's what it means, so why the fuck not?"

"Wasn't Mr. Hatake _just_ telling you to watch your language?"

That voice.

I'd never heard it out loud, but . . . it sounded just like the one I'd imagined . . .

It couldn't be . . .

I turned in my seat.

Sasuke leaned back in his chair.

His bangs fell out of his eyes and hooking onto the black spikes in his hair.

"Can we help you?"

Sasuke always comes through, even in those little ways.

"No, but I can help _you_ to keep your tongue in place," said Miss Priss, crossing her arms over her super-flat chest.

I looked her up and down.

She had long hair and a feminine face, but her pants were low, like a boy's would be, despite that they were pretty tight, and she wore a collared, cotton shirt buttoned all the way up.

Still, I wasn't about to go asking if she was a boy.

Not the snotty girl that stepped on Sasuke's toe without a glance back; uh-uh.

Only a complete idiot would do that.

"Who the hell are you to tell me what to do?"

Good move.

The muscles in Miss Priss's arms tightened as she gripped angrily at the sleeves of her shirt and the way her arms were folded seemed to ascend in bad attitude.

"I'm Mr. Hatake's teacher assistant. I switched from art class. Anything you do I can report to Mr. Hatake."

She lifted her chin with authority.

I frowned at her deep voice.

Sasuke pulled absently at his bangs. "Name?"

"Hyuuga Neji. But what would you care?"

I blinked.

Hinata's last name was Hyuuga . . . Hadn't she mentioned a cousin before . . . ?

" . . . Gender?" Sasuke asked reluctantly.

"A guy, thanks," she . . . well, I guess it would only be right to say he, snapped.

Sasuke nodded in mock interest and snapped his head back up, his bangs flipping back into place.

His fingers found the keys like they had been born to them and he continued with his typing.

I'd never seen a guy look more pissy.

I mean pissy like a girl gets, like, PMS.

Of course, I'd never seen a guy so girly either.

But who ever said that was affecting the way he acted?

I took one more look and decided that there was no possible way that anyone had ever met him and assumed for one second that he was a boy.

I wouldn't be surprised if half of his teachers still thought he was a girl and will never find out the truth.

Class ended like it always did, with Mr. Hatake making a crack at our gender.

Frankly, I don't know what he means by that; he makes it out like the two of us look like girls or something.

Our hair isn't even long.

It could be our tight pants, or tight shirts, or Sasuke's black nail polish, or even my shoelaces, but who ever said boys couldn't have strawberry print on their shoelaces?

Whatever it was, I couldn't help but wonder why the fuck he didn't jab on the Neji kid.

He was such a jerk; he deserved it.

Which is why even Sasuke smiled a prickling grin filled with malice when Neji ran into Sasuke's elbow.

Right in the stomach.

The kid needs better coordination.

Of course, Mr. Hatake declared that this was no simple accident and decided that the only way to get Sasuke to learn to control his elbows, and the rest of his arm for that matter, was to exercise them by clapping out the chalk board erasers.

Despite my groans of boredom, I stayed after to give him a hand.

It's been rumored, and a very logical rumor at that, which are very rare now adays, that Mr. Hatake pours chalk powder over his erasers every day, lets the chalk settle, and then pours some more over once more.

This way, when some dumb kid snitches, he has something for the victim to do.

This is mainly logical because there isn't a single chalkboard in the entire high school.

And Hatake was always pulling them out of a special drawer.

Strange but effective.

So, we were on our way out the school doors, having left a beautiful mural of chalk dust over everything we past, ending in a cloud of chalk, in which was hidden a quick high five; and we were just wiping our hands onto our jeans, and I was just starting to laugh about a joke Sasuke had cracked about Mr. Hatake and his chalk board erasers, when I bumped into someone at the end of the stairs.

I looked up to find the freakish white-silver eyes looking down at me with a million red-hot, metal needles shooting at me like I were Satan himself . . . or whatever.

"What do you want?" Sasuke growled, trying to hide his anger.

Keep out emotion when speaking with jerkoffs like this guy.

Ah, good old Sasuke and his complete protectiveness.

How I love that guy.

"What I don't want," the Neji kid grabbed me by the collar and dragged me over to the side and out of his sight, "Is this punk interfering."

I opened my mouth to protest, but Sasuke spoke first.

"What's the point in that?" he growled, grabbing my wrist and pulling me to him like some kind of little kid, "Anything you do or say, he's going to find out about later."

"Well then let him find out later," Neji said, clearly trying to contain his rage.

"Nope," said Sasuke, finally calming down, cool as usual.

Neji clenched his fists and his mouth twisted into various shapes before settling into a very firm frown. "Whatever then, not like I care."

Then his lips relaxed and a very nasty smile slid over his lips like a knife had just slashed his face and allowed a mask of rubber and plastic to fall away.

What happened next was so absurd that I'm still not sure if it really happened or not. I kind of wonder if I didn't see correctly and Neji actually punched Sasuke.

But I know that it was that kid in my heart again, making things up, because it was clear as my hair is yellow, that after Neji grabbed Sasuke's collar, causing me to stumble away, that he most definitely kissed him.

It was long and pretty gross, but I couldn't help but stare, and I'm sure at least ten flies made it into my mouth.

I'm pretty bent on the idea that it was something like this that caused the Big Bang, and possibly the same thing that wiped out the dinosaurs.

I think that's what I'll say when Ms. Mitarashi asks that in science.

I sit next to Sasuke in that class too . . .

He'll probably hit me, but it'll be funny.

But humor seemed so distant at the moment.

The fun we had just had wiping chalk all over the halls and trailing it along on the bottom of our shoes: It seems like ages ago.

They finally broke apart.

And Neji waved, like they had been dating for a year.

And they always said goodbye like this.

And he hopped on his scooter, which I had hardly noticed had been leaning against the school steps.

I looked to Sasuke, who had his tongue sticking out, like he was hoping someone would come along and disinfect it.

Then he turned to me like he was thinking exactly what I was thinking.

"Get your skates on; I'll go head him off, you come from behind so he doesn't get away."

And he sprinted over to a bush where he hid his skateboard, because the teachers'd confiscate them if they caught you with a board.

And he was gone in a flash, his helmet still in his backpack.

I plopped down on the steps and swung my backpack around, pulling out my skates.

I was just pulling on the second one in a complete rush, like I had a time limit, when I realized that there was a strange tickle in my stomach.

Not the kind you get when someone pins you to the floor and runs their fingers over your belly.

No, it was more like tiny pieces of silk fabric were being blown around by a fan on the inside, rolling gently over the tissue of my stomach.

And I realized that there was no way I could help Sasuke.

We'd been best friends since as long as I can remember, but for once, something told me I didn't want to see what was going to happen.

I didn't was to see Neji and Sasuke together ever again.

I didn't even want to hear of or see or think of Neji for the rest of my life.

No.

I strapped on my skates.

I pulled my jeans over them.

I rolled quietly down to the side walk.

I checked to see if the coast was clear.

Then I jetted towards home, which, luckily, was the opposite direction of Sasuke and Neji.

Sooner then you could listen to even one rather short song, I found myself skidding to a stop in front of my apartment building.

Rushing through the main entrance.

Blading through the lobby.

Gripping the railing in the elevator.

Half blading half running down the hall.

Passing that annoying ass cat, Shishou.

Unlocking my door with shaky hands.

Falling through my door.

Slamming it behind me.

Sliding down the door until I was sitting with my legs to my chest.

My feelings finally caught up with me like a trail of lit gun powder under my feet.

My breath was heavy and it hurt as my chest heaved, following the rhythm of my heartbeat carefully.

Fear.

Worry.

Regret.

Pain.

Sorrow.

It was like my heart was having a funeral or something.

I shifted my shoulders as I struggled to get my skates off, trying to unclench the tight grip around my insides.

So strange these feeling were.

I couldn't recognize them.

My skates left in front of the door, like some kind of extra security, I slumped away from the hall and into my room, plopping down onto my bed, where the sheets were cold, but in that refreshing way, and the blanket seemed to know how I felt, and covered me in just the way I needed it to.

And as I buried my face into my pillow, I finally noticed the warm tears pressing against my face and soaking into the pillow.

I wondered half-heartedly when I had started crying.

I wanted to check my shirt to see how wet I'd gotten it to get a clue, but I was practically exhausted, and not from skating.

Sasuke would be calling soon.

I knew he would.

He called everyday after school, no matter what, and today was extra special, so it would be a complete phenomenon for him to skip out.

And part of me wanted him to call just to prove his loyalty, but the other part, the majority . . . wished he'd just go die.

**TBC**

(1)This is kind of an older term that not a lot of kids say anymore, and I picked it up from my older sisters. "Miffed" means annoyed, pissed-off.

They're pretty OOC, but I like the way it's going.


	2. Worrying

**Those Weird Feeling No One Ever Gets**

Looks like I actually made it to chapter two.

Amazing.

But you know what? Love is what I got. I said, remember that. Love is what I got.

And that's all I have to say about that.

* * *

The next time I opened my eyes the room was dark and blurry and it was a great strain to move my eyes around.

I sat up on my bed, my whole face feeling like it had been sat on for at least an hour.

I couldn't breath through my nose.

Lying back down, on my back this time, I wondered if it had gotten cloudy or if the sun had set.

I didn't check, though.

I didn't care.

Then I remembered what had happened with Sasuke and Neji.

I had dreamt that I'd wake up and the whole thing would end up being a dream.

Of course, the chances of it being a dream after a dream like that are zero to none.

But I could always hope.

Blinking red, the digital clock faced me like an angry parent.

Do you know what time it is mister? You've slept all afternoon!

Indeed, I had.

I got home around two . . . I looked at the clock again.

Wow . . . eight . . . I guess I'd been staying up too late too often . . .

Man, I felt like shit.

I couldn't even think straight.

My tears wouldn't cease, like a leaky faucet

My nose wouldn't stop running, so I plugged a tissue in it and fell back onto my bed.

And still, warm tears made shiny trails across my cheeks and down my chin.

And it sucked because they cooled and made me feel all slimy and gross, like I couldn't take care of my own body.

I can't say that the whole ordeal made me feel very great.

I didn't know why it was beating me up, but it was, and I couldn't seem to send myself in any other direction.

But, that aside, it was hard to say that a nice long cry wasn't relaxing.

They say boys shouldn't cry, but why not?

It was OK if you had reason . . .

And as my tears slowed to nothingness, I almost wished I could keep crying.

That would be rather weird, though, seeing as I didn't even know I was crying in the first place.

A tickling sensation, starting at my thigh, suddenly spread throughout my entire leg and waist, and I jolted up, catching myself before I fell off the bed.

I reached to my jean pocket and pulled my vibrating cellphone, squinting blearily at the contact name.

Sasuke.

It wasn't ringing, just a message.

Make that twelve messages.

My head dropped and I flipped open the phone.

Sasuke usually had a knack for making me feel better, but now . . .

Oh, my aching conscience.

I pressed a couple keys and brought the phone to my ear.

It was almost painful wondering what Sasuke would say.

_Oi, Naru, it's Sasuke, just wondering what's up. And where the hell you went off to. Though you always did have a weak bladder. Got some news. And I forgot what we had for history homework. Call back. Loves. Later. _

With a sigh, I went to the next message.

This wasn't as bad as I'd anticipated.

_Hello? Naru, Sasuke again. You ok? You normally pick up like your life depends on it. Well, call me. Loves. Later. _

Jeez, I'd never get through all these without crumbling into a little pile of depression.

I skipped to the last one.

_God, Naruto, answer the damn phone! You're seriously worrying me! God... OK, for real, pick up! _

He sounded like he was having a mental breakdown.

_Dude, I-I went to your house, where the hell are you? If it's not fatal I swear, it will be once I'm done with you. Call back, you little fuck! Loves... L-later. _

That damn Sasuke.

Caring about me like I'm the only other person in the entire world.

But I was.

In his world.

And it'd crumble without me.

He'd told me himself.

So I had to call back, I just had to.

I knew he'd answer, since it was still early.

He was probably sitting by the phone at this very minute.

I really didn't want to talk to anyone, especially Sasuke, but it had to be done.

Punching in his number like I had so many times before, I swallowed back my fears and made a passageway to let my voice tunnel through.

I brought the phone to my ear.

One ring . . .

Two rings . . .

Three rings . . .

_Yo, you've reached Uchiha Sasuke. Not home right now or avoiding you. Call later. Out._ Suddenly there was a loud clattering, and a recording less formal than the rest. _Naruto, if that's you, then... good lord I can't believe I'm not answering the fucking phone! You better not be dying! Loves. Later! _

I couldn't help but smile.

Even in a rush Sasuke added the code.

"Loves. Later."

It wasn't a secret code as most codes are.

It meant what was said.

And nothing could make you feel better.

"Hey, Sasuke, it's Naruto. Sorry, I got home and I fell asleep. I'll explain it tomorrow. Please, remain sane for just a little longer, no breakdowns. You promised you'd save that for your wedding. Gotta go eat, I'm starving. Remember, tomorrow you bring lunch money. Loves. Later."

My hand shook as I snapped my phone shut.

I could tell what Sasuke must have been feeling; I was getting paranoid from just one call.

But twelve?

Poor guy.

Slinking out of my room, tripping on my laptop and several textbooks on the way to the door, I headed into to the kitchen for some food.

Some might hate to admit it, but I'm rather proud to say that I'm a foodaholic.

Though I don't blame other people; I eat like the Jews did after the Holocaust and remain as fit as anyone would be that's on a regular diet who does routine exercise, but some people eat and can't keep off the weight.

No problem with that, if you can get a good job that doesn't require physical activity and you don't become obese to the point of life threatening, then by all means, eat!

I opened the fridge and frowned.

Well, be sure you have a full fridge before proclaiming that you don't care about your weight.

Dammit, I had told myself a million times to go shopping, but I never got a chance.

And now I stood, bare foot on the cold, tile flooring, the cool air of the refrigerator seeping out and surrounding me like some kind of toxic gas with a mind of its own like in that freaky movie Sasuke and I saw last week at the drive in.

They wouldn't let us in without a car, so we had to disguise ourselves as the waitresses at the Sonic in the snack bar.

The skating part was fun, but some guy ended up pulling up my skirt, thinking I was some chick, and, by reflex, I kneed him in the balls.

It was kind of fun until the manager found out that I also spilt a soda on someone in the process and we were kicked out the old fashioned way.

I don't know what the old fashioned way is, but if I did, I'm sure it would be the same thing.

And thinking about that Sonic place just made me even hungrier.

I slammed the fridge like I was slamming it in the face of some jerky kitchen gnome trying to explain that he'd been going twenty days without food, and my fridge just happened to be the nearest and fullest one and where do I keep my catsup?

Damn gnome . . .

Storming out into the family room, I snatched up my jacket and pulled it on forcefully, hopped into my slippers and headed out of my building.

Funny that it's called a family room when my mom died giving birth to me, and my dad died in a car accident that I survived with only six cuts to the face.

People called me whisker face for that.

Well, not when Sasuke was around.

It's a lame ass insult anyway.

I held my breath as I shuffled down the hall towards the elevator, urging myself not to kick that damn Shishou.

Sasuke said it was jerky of me to dislike Shishou since he had a cat himself, but Mistress was different.

Mistress was the coolest cat in the whole world, and no one would ever steal her because she was "bad luck".

Shishou was a brat that hissed at me when I tried to pet him and acted all goody-two-shoes around the rest of the world.

If anyone was jerky, it was Shishou, not me.

But, of course, all Sasuke saw was Shishou's good side, so he wouldn't believe me.

God . . .

I kicked the first floor button with my foot with a cool Kung Fu move I learned from a Jackie Chan movie, and took on an FBI pose as the elevator closed in front of me.

It made me wish I had a pair of those sun glasses like in "Men in Black," to finish up the look, since I already had the trench coat.

But then I found myself, a lot less pimp and professional, snuggled up in my jacket, leaning against the wall.

Because that kid in my heart had remembered that this was Sasuke's jacket.

Freak.

And thinking of Sasuke made me wish we could go to a movie together.

Just us, no one else, the entire theatre empty except for Sasuke, Meg Ryan, and I.

Meg Ryan . . .

Where'd that come from?

Doesn't she do chick flicks or something?

It's that kid again!

Dammit . . .

The shining metal doors slid away and my reflection disappeared along with it.

Jumping out from the elevator, I ducked behind the love seat that people would sit at to read their mail or wait for people to come down from their rooms.

Peeking over the big green cushions, I stared hard at the desk next to the entrance, and was never more relieved to see the wrinkled old face of Miss Carson.

It was second shift, so Mr. Old Dude, whom I never bothered to get the actual name of in the four years I'd been staying at the same apartment building, was probably in his room behind the office, drinking expensive coffee with Irish crème and fancy whiskey.

He always smelt like whiskey.

I couldn't stand that guy.

Very anti-kid.

I only ever have one friend over, and he still makes it out like I'm some kind of college kid, always having huge parties.

And now Sasuke isn't allowed to stay in the lobby.

He had only broken one vase, and, come on, do you know how hard it is to pull off that skate-boarding move on carpet?

Old Dude knows nothing of the skate world.

So non-cultural.

Yeah, so, he hates me, but that's fine.

I hate him too.

I rushed out of the door at last, hoping not to get stuck in another droning conversation about Miss Carson's toy poodle and her puppies, which she had a year ago.

But the story never gets old; at least not to Miss Carson.

And then I was running down the road, trying to outdo my last time, and I skid through sliding doors, or magical entranceway, as Sasuke put it, in no time flat.

"Fifty-seven!" I shouted, punching the air victoriously, "Yeah baby!"

Ayame, one of the store clerk at the Ralph's, who always seems to have a shift when I come in to shop, smiled her soft, delicate smile and said, "One more second than last time, right?"

I smiled back, and Sasuke always said that I look like a dork when I smile big like that, since my eyes close and you can see all my teeth and even some of my gums.

Well, he's a dork when he smiles too.

Since he hardly smiles.

Lamey lame lame.

But that's why he rocks.

I guess.

Milk, Oreos, strawberries, vanilla yogurt, Winterfresh.

I turned the corner to the next isle and started down it at a run.

As I reached the end of the isle, I turned around sharply, ran several steps, and slapped my basket down on the floor, hopping on and sliding down the rest of the isle.

Nothing beats basket boarding when one is nearing the end of a field trip to Ralph's.

Of course, it isn't all that great when you slow down and tip off of the basket.

This is why they make rolling baskets: So that won't happen.

But to open your eyes to the ramen shelf; well, it made up for the falling face down onto hard tile thing.

I grabbed my runaway milk and dumped as much ramen as would fit into my hand basket and was just heading to the checkout counter when I heard Artic Monkeys playing loud around a corner.

_I said I bet that you look good on the dance floor, don't know if you're looking for- _

And then it stopped and a familiar voice began to speak.

Funny . . .

The voice speaking belonged to that ring tone.

I whipped my cell phone from my pocket and dialed Sasuke, holding the phone to my ear.

Around the corner, Maximes began to play, nice and loud for all to hear.

_Hello boy, ain't nobody else, when I think about you I touch myself. Hello b- _

"I know you."

I grinned stupidly as Sasuke's voice rang out twice. Once in my ear and once around the corner.

"Nice ring tone. I feel special," I said as I stepped over to the next isle to face spiked hair and the back of a plaid jacket.

Sasuke turned away from his cart in surprise.

Hadn't seen that expression in a while.

Then I couldn't see anything.

"Oh my god!" Sasuke shouted.

He sounded like a girl, one of those girls who says it like, 'Like, oh my effing gaw!'

Pfft.

It suited Sasuke like a bikini suited Miss Carson.

That'd be a negative.

Like, never ever in a billion jillion years.

. . . And a half.

I pulled my head away from Sasuke's chest, which angered mister kid in my heart greatly, and I panted like I just came up after diving into a nine-foot pool.

"Why didn't you answer my calls, you little ass?" he cried, squeezing me like I was a teddy bear.

"Hey, I called you back, but you didn't answer," I said defensively.

Not like he heard me. He was acting like I just came back from a war.

"I thought you died!" Sasuke wailed, "I thought you got in a skating accident, like a car ran you over! And you didn't even come to the door when I knocked!"

I guess it wasn't so bad.

At least I knew for sure he cared.

Unless you consider the violent hugs and burning guilt some kind of sign of anger.

I doubt it.

At last, Sasuke dropped his hands, and I was in mid-defense system, about to hold my basket in front of me, when he . . .

Ok, maybe he didn't.

But the last time I'd wondered if someone had actually kissed someone else I had thought the same thing.

No. This was definitely what it seemed.

A nice sloppy one on the cheek like he was my grandma.

"You little fuck, do that again and I'll beat you into porridge!"

He sounded mad but . . . he was too obvious for me.

He was relieved.

And why shouldn't he be?

I was alive.

He was alive.

It was all good.

Yes, yes, good times.

But now what?

We were at the grocery store, I was being suffocated, Sasuke was being the loudest I'd seen him all year, and he just kissed me.

He kissed me . . .

Why did it feel so awkward?

It really shouldn't.

Thinking that way was plain gross.

He's my best friend, for heaven's sake.

But . . . my cheek was tingling like a rose had brushed over it and all I could think was how Neji kissed Sasuke and my mind forced me to watch it.

Over and over.

Until my eyes burned.

I blinked, and realized they burned because there were tears leaking from them.

Sasuke was jabbering away while he looked the rows of soup cans up and down.

My chance.

I rubbed my eyes with the sleeve of the black jacket and quickly looked up, hoping I didn't look suspicious.

"You ok?" Sasuke asked, an eyebrow cocked at me.

I put on the best smile I could muster and said, "Never been better, why do you ask?"

"Dunno," he mumbled, turning back to the soup and choosing two cans of tomato and some chicken noodle, "It just . . . Forget it."

On any other occasion I would have pestered the answer out of him.

But this time I was the one bluffing so I turned around and made up the best lie I could think of.

"I'm gonna go get some Popsicles and head home. Catch you tomorrow."

Not a step, I mean, come on, I was freaking mid-step when he grabbed my wrist and caught up.

Reflexes.

It's what makes him such a great skater.

Cool, cool.

Then I'd just use Plan B...

Which is . . .

Oh yeah, to avoid talking about Neji or kissing or kissing Neji, at all costs.

Just great.

"Man, wait 'til I tell you about that Neji kid!" Sasuke started, still holding my wrist like I would run away.

Even better.

I wiggled my fingers, checking to see if Sasuke had stopped the circulatory activity.

Big words.

Hell yeah.

"What... eh, what happened?"

"You would know if you hadn't left," Sasuke said, half joking and half genuinely mad.

Anxiety burst in me and flowed around, reaching every corner of my body.

This was it.

Did I tell him? Was now the moment I admitted my love to him? That I was jealous of Neji and wished him dead and in his grave by sun up?

But since when did I love him? How can you admit your love to someone when you haven't even admitted it to yourself?

The answer is simple.

You don't.

Either that or you run away as fast as possible and lock all your doors and windows.

I decided I wouldn't run.

I also decided that no way in hell would I tell Sasuke that there was even the slightest chance of me liking him like . . . that.

I shuddered.

Who was I kidding? I _didn't_ like him, or anyone, for that matter, in a romantic way.

No way.

Nuh uh.

Lies!

Lies, lies, lies!

I'm losing it, I know I am.

That kid was taking over, starting from my heart outward. Soon he would control my movements and speech, and suddenly I'd have to change my name, because Uzumaki Naruto is not that kid.

That kid . . .

I don't know him, and I don't want to know him.

And now, thanks to him, I can't even walk in a comfortable silence with my best friend without feeling awkward.

So I ran.

Dumb.

I said I didn't want to do that.

"I-I just remembered that I left the stove on!" I shouted back, turning a corner and grabbing the Popsicles quickly.

I dumped my stuff on the check out belt and tossed my basket to the side.

"Hurry Ayame," I whispered urgently, "I have to get out of here."

Sliding the food items across the beeper, as I'd formally named it, at super speed, Ayame asked, "Why the rush?"

"Love life," I said, grabbing my bags and turning to run out the door, "Thanks Aya, see ya!"

And then I was running.

Free as a bird.

I was half tempted to skip school the next day.

Sort out my thoughts.

I wish they were all written on paper to make it easier.

I halted at last at the door to my apartment complex and looked down the street.

No Sasuke.

It was almost disappointing.

I had kind of hoped he would follow.

I don't know why, I don't know what I would have done if he had, but to think that he didn't follow . . .

Kind of unlike him, I guess.

Maybe I was worried?

Whatever it was, I didn't look twice and simply went back up to my apartment.

Ramen made it a little better.

Hot and steamy.

It didn't answer any of the questions I asked it.

It didn't exceed its duty of deliciousness.

It was nothing other than ramen.

Not a psychiatrist.

Not a therapist.

Not a bigger bowl of ramen.

But, hey, you can't expect much from food except to be food.

That's OK, though.

I was full and that's all that mattered.

I dumped my bowl in the sink.

I don't think that was all that mattered.

I swept into the living room, ready for some "Who's Line is it Anyway?"

Before I'd picked up the remote, my house phone caught my eye.

The message light was blinking, so I hit the button, and leaned forward to listen.

_This is your only warning. Stay away from Uchiha Sasuke. I don't care what he is to you. Stay away or prepare for painful humiliation. _

My right eye twitched.

I'd never received a call so . . . not nice.

Such an unfamiliar voice.

Thuggish, manly, almost like a gangbanger.

I didn't feel the least bit scared, but when I looked at them, I found my hands were shaking with nerves.

Maybe I'd skip TV.

Maybe if I went to bed I'd wake up and find it was all a dream.

And maybe my high school life wasn't really turning upside down.

Maybe.

But not likely.

**TBC**

* * *

I've reread this chapter at least four times, but you know, that part where the thuggish guy says "This is your only warning . . . " etc . . .

It scares the shit out of me every time. I just can never see it coming.

Jesus H. Christ . . .

There's something wrong with that, it would seem.


	3. Late

**Those Weird Feelings No One Ever Gets**

I have a question.

What does love got to do with it? Got to do with it? What does love . . . Got to do with it?

We need some sex to "pump this shit up, dawg" or we'll all get bored.

* * *

Everyone does it once and a while.

OK, some people do it once and a while.

All right, maybe I'm the only one.

Someone like me, who's only acquainted with about four people, and only sees one of them on a daily basis, wouldn't really know the habits of the normal teenager.

You can't really define Sasuke and me as normal anyway.

But, I know for a fact that even my little perfectionist, Sasuke, has woken up late on a school day, even though it was just once.

Maybe only we have ever woken up late when it was a school day.

Or perhaps it happens all the time.

But as I laid facing the clock, the sun hiding and fooling me into believing it was still before dawn, all I was thinking was how bad my back hurt and how much I wished I could keep sleeping.

Not about Sasuke, or waking up late, or school at all.

My eyes wobbled in my sockets, settling back until my mind caught up.

I saw the red numbers clearly, glowing in my usually lively room, but I didn't register what they meant.

That is, until that kid, who had woken up hours earlier, waiting patiently for me to wake, shouted loudly at me about being late for school, and what, did I enjoy detention, and, oh, Sasuke would surely worry.

Realization stumbled in at last, and I was out of bed so fast that I'm sure I had heard the blankets tear.

Now, I'll admit that my room is rather cluttered, and the cleanest it ever gets is when Sasuke and I push all my crap to the side and play strip poker in the middle of my room.

Entertaining.

Of course, I always win.

Sometimes.

OK, it's fifty-fifty.

But, if you'd seen it, you'd have to admit that there was an obvious change after I left for school that morning.

For the worse.

Unless you like messy rooms.

In that case, for the better.

7:43.

I was rushing around the room, possibly as fast as three of the track jocks, drinking ten cups of coffee each, all put together.

Not like I've ever seen that.

Or anything like it.

And it's pretty lame.

But . . . I think it's funny.

Ahahaha.

OK, not really laughing.

The only thing that was on my mind was eight o' clock.

My time was set.

8:00.

School started at eight o' clock and my time was ticking and there I was, not able to get my pants to zip.

I was finally pulling on the nearest socks to my right hand when something on my bedside table started spitting out Bowling for Soup.

_Rock! She works at Hottopic, his heart microscopic, she thinks that it's-_

As the words echoed around my room and the guitar wailed, I dove over my backpack, landing brutally on my soccer ball and snatched up my phone.

"Hello?" I shouted into the phone.

I scrunched my nose in distaste and examined the cell phone.

I flipped it over and held the receiver to my ear.

" . . . the hell are you?" Sasuke was shouting when I got my phone right side up.

I rested the phone between my shoulder and cheek, pulling my backpack to me and shoving in my shoes. "Ugh, I slept in," I groaned, "I'll be there in a sec."

Beyond his phone, I could hear the bustle of daily high school life all around Sasuke, and it made me feel kind of bad.

Sasuke had always been bothered by the school crowds.

Really, big crowds like at concerts and movies, when he was around people with a wider opinion and more brain cells, were OK with him, but the regular school crowd: It annoyed him to no end.

Girls slapping his ass.

The idiotic atmosphere.

Loud gossip and complaining and prejudices.

I don't blame him.

Normally we would walk, or more like, skate to school together, and so once we reached the school we'd head straight for Mr. Hatake's.

No one ever went there; sometimes even Mr. Hatake would leave to the teacher's lounge after some time.

Just the way we liked it.

And here I was, pulling on the first articles of clothing I could reach, a little over a mile away from where Sasuke stood, waiting for me.

"OK, " said Sasuke, still within the muck of noise, "I'll be on the steps."

"Wah, no!" I screeched, rushing out of my room and jumping into my skates, "I'm just leaving my apartment now! You'll be late for class!"

"Hn . . . " Sasuke grunted.

I knew that meant, 'OK'.

But I also knew that he wouldn't obey.

"Alright, I'll stall Mr. Sarutobi for you."

I smiled to myself as I locked the door and, as if we'd planned it, the two of us simultaneously said, "Loves. Later."

I flipped my phone closed and shoved it in my pocket, then blasting down the hall and hitting the down button on the elevator.

What luck to get stuck in the elevator for three floors with the dog-walking lady from the fourteenth floor.

It stunk like crazy and the chihuahua kept biting on my roller blade wheels.

You can bet that, when the elevator stopped on the bottom floor, I was out of there like a speeding bullet just as soon as the doors started moving.

"No skates in the lobby!" Old Dude shouted after me, but he had hardly finished before the glass door swung shut behind me.

I was already halfway down the block.

As I skated up the one dip in the road, I concentrated all my thoughts on my prize.

I guess you could say it was Sasuke, but that sounded weird, so I decided my prize was P.E. first period.

Sasuke was better.

Hell, Sasuke was better than everything.

The wind blew my hair from my face as I started speeding down the hill.

And there he was.

I didn't even see the kid until it was too late.

"Uwah! Watch out!" I yelled, trying to stop my skates or swerve out of the way.

But I tried to swerve right and the kid ducked to the right to get out of the way, so it was all very ineffective.

Pulling my leg from the honeysuckle bush that had worked as a sort of cushion, I hissed loudly, the leaves and twigs rubbing against several good scratches and one pretty deep cut.

I pushed my self to a sitting position and examined my arms.

Skinned elbows and several bruises-to-be.

I'd been through worse, but that didn't make these wounds feel any better.

"Oi, sorry, man, I don't know why I didn't see you earlier, you were _right there_," I looked up and nearly fell back down.

Not a scratch on the kid.

His hair was even still perfect.

Did he fall or not?

"No big deal," said the kid in an almost eery but soothing voice, holding out his hand to me to help me up, "You missed anyway."

At first I hardly noticed his peace offering.

My head tilted in awe as I stared at the kid's face.

I'd never see such an excessive amount of eyeliner used before.

He wore so much that it almost looked like it was his natural skin color or something.

And on his for head . . .

I mean, this kid was my age and . . .

A tattoo?

I'd never seen anything cooler. His hair was even a cool color and he had a black and red thing going on with his clothes.

Can you say love at first sight?

Well neither can I, but that kid down in there wouldn't shut up about it.

"Are you alright?" the kid said, kneeling down, "I have some water if you want to use that to clean up your legs and elbows. They look pretty bad."

I mouthed something about beauty and perfection, and I'm sure it looked like I was doing nothing but chewing a giant wad of gum.

Still, nothing managed to come out.

"Here," said the kid, pulling out an Auqufina water bottle and one of those mini Kleenex tissue packs.

So mini and cute.

I like putting them on top of the regular size Kleenex boxes.

It's so precious.

With disbelieving eyes, I watched as the kid poured some water onto a tissue and dabbed carefully at the cuts on my legs.

"Do you think you can do your arms?"

Blinking, I nodded soundlessly.

What a moron (me, that is).

I finally meet someone new that I want to get to know, and I can't even speak.

The kid handed me a wet Kleenex and watched, with his hands on his knees, as I scrubbed the just-starting-to-crust blood from my arms and held the tissue to my cuts to slow the bleeding.

I was just about to toss my tissue when the kid took it gently from my hand and stashed it in his backpack.

"I'll throw it away at school," he said, standing up and holding out a hand once more.

"Th-thanks," I managed, grabbing his hand as we both made an effort of pulling me to my feet.

There was a swift moment of silence as I brushed off my shorts and shirt and ran a hand through my hair.

"So," the kid said, "Are you heading to the high school right now?"

" . . . Yes!" I shouted, remembering I was going to be late and heading down the street, "Thanks a lot for you help! Catch you around!"

I've never regretted running away from anyone more in my entire life.

I mean, with Sasuke, if I ran away I would always see him later.

This kid was new to me; I didn't even know his name and now, thanks to my idiocy, I never would.

My curiosity wanted to turn back and ask, but my responsibility, worry, and anticipation said it was a big fat, 'no', and it was three against one.

So I kept on, and suddenly I could see the school, my battle wounds stinging in the frosty air of January as it hit forcefully back at me.

My wheels squelched as I turned dangerously into the schoolyard and raced up to the steps, plopping down in Sasuke's lap and ripping of my blades.

"Took long enough," Sasuke grunted, peeking over my shoulder, "What's up with the blood? It's not that horrid, horrid Shishou?"

I stuffed my skates in my bad and yanked out my shoes.

"No, shut up. I ran into some kid and I flew into a bush."

And he laughed.

It was the only thing one could expect from Sasuke.

Nothing more, nothing less.

I stood from Sasuke's lap, my cuts stinging as the skin on my legs and arms stretched painfully.

"Nice outfit," said Sasuke as we padded up the stairs and through the double doors.

I paused a moment to look down.

And all I could do was blame Sasuke.

An entire outfit consisting of clothes Sasuke bought me or convinced me into buying.

I normally kept them in the 'do not wear, ever,' pile.

But I'd been in such a rush . . .

In all hopes, people had decided over night that it was a trend not to make fun of people anymore.

Yeah, in, like, 2587 C.E. (2)

Maybe.

I snorted angrily but said nothing.

He was the one that had a matching shirt any way.

'Too sexy for my boyfriend.'

Those kinds of things were always fun to buy, but sucky to wear unless you planned it out.

And here I was with a black shirt and the neon-white letters splattered across my chest, pink short shorts, and yellow knee-highs.

God dammit, this day was going from bad to worse.

All the time.

That aside, I'm sure you've heard the term 'weak in the knees'?

I've always thought that was a lame saying.

But now I understand.

My knees shook beneath me, my feet scuffling over the blue and white flooring, my footing awkward.

And now, all I could think of was that kid staring down at me with those freaky-cool, aqua-green eyes.

Who the hell was this kid?

He looked about my age, but why wasn't he at school?

And why didn't I get a better look at his ass?

No, no, no, that's just sick . . .

Still.

"Dude!" Sasuke shouted, hooking me under the arm-pits, "Are you on drugs or something?"

I stumbled and fell back into his embrace.

Warm and soft, just like always.

With a sigh, I fell limp and tilted my head back to rest on Sasuke's shoulder.

There'd never been a day when I'd wanted to skip school more.

I was tired, unnerved, anxious, embarrassed, and I forgot to do my homework.

Maybe Sasuke and I could just skate down to the board walk . . .

Have some ice cream . . .

Stop at the park near Willow St. . . .

Play on the swings . . .

Skate over to the record store . . .

"You two!"

The authority!

My instinct was to shout, 'Run!' and drag Sasuke with me out the two front doors.

But my voice clogged up at the back of my throat.

My feet wiggled around and wouldn't respond to my brain.

"What are you doing out of class?"

"Not being in class, obviously," said Sasuke coolly, lifting me to my feet.

The woman approached at such a pace that the "Jaws" theme started playing in my head.

"Don't you start with me," the woman snapped, stopping in front of us abruptly, hand on hip.

Very, 'Oh no you didn't.'

I imagined her as the rest of the girls in school.

But this time it wasn't one of those bitchy girls who placed themselves as queens of the universe.

It was really someone to fear.

Someone who really could bring punishment down upon us.

"Start what?"

Man, I love that guy.

Nothing phases him.

Of course, spontaneous kisses smack on the lips from someone you hardly even know could be an exception.

And when I don't answer the phone when he calls.

And when someone insults me.

And when he can't find his skateboard after school lets out.

OK, so a lot of stuff phases him, but not like stuff phases me.

I can't even look at a Fruit Loops box without going mad.

Or any cereal.

Damn cereal cracks.

They get me every time.

"Don't be a smart alec, mister, just get to class!"

"My name isn't Alec, nor is it ass, which would be the term you're looking for, right?"

"One more crack, and you both have detention!"

"Unjust!" Sasuke bit out.

Then he steered me around to head for the boy's locker room.

"My Naru didn't even say anything, crazy lady!" he shouted over his shoulder once we were far enough away.

"Dress code!" she shouted, "Those shorts are far too short!"

He sniggered. "You know she likes them."

I blinked, and it was a perfect, 'Did you say something?' moment, but I kept quiet.

So I was practically carried down the halls until Sasuke nearly tossed me into the locker room and slammed the door behind himself.

"Alright," said Sasuke, tugging me along by the hand, letting go once we were at our lockers, "Just tell me if you need help getting those unlawful shorts off."

"Just remember, you bought them," I snarled, stripping down to my boxers and tossing my clothes into my locker.

Sasuke looked down in disappointment, "Aw, no pink, three-year-old undies, with a puppies on them?"

"I think they're still under your bed," I replied, popping my head out of my P.E. shirt and snatching up my shorts.

"Should I hand wash them for you?"

"As long as you hang dry them."

Then we stopped.

In one of those ways where all you do is stop; not a pause, not an awkward silence, just a stop.

"Listening in, our we?"

I gave Sasuke a funny look, but when I heard someone step around the corner, I understood, and turned around, P.E. shorts in hand.

And I had to rub my eyes and look again to make sure I wasn't dreaming, like I hoped I had been for so long.

No, it was definitely her.

I mean, him.

"Sasuke," said Neji, nodding, "And . . . you."

"Naruto!" I said with pride and anger.

"Whatever."

"Don't you whatever my Naru," Sasuke said, rather calm for him when it was his unphasing-habit time.

He flopped his arms over my shoulders and leaning forward against me.

"What_ever_," Neji growled, clearly growing impatient.

"Or whatever my anti-whatevers."

It sounded funny.

Not Sasuke.

Neji.

I didn't know he was capable of laughing.

I mean, it was more like a snort than a laugh, but it was a sound made when one found good humor in something, so, laugh it was.

"What are you doing in here anyway? This is Sophomore P.E., not Junior," I said, Sasuke wrapping his arms around me like I was a big puppy dog.

Neji flipped some stray locks of hair from his face, and looked directly at Sasuke, openly avoiding my face.

"So, Sasuke, I know you're still getting over our little ordeal, but I was thinking we could hang out for a little while after school today. You know, just to talk and stuff."

Like that would happen.

Sasuke hanging out with a jerk-ass like this?

Like the big bad wolf having teatime with Granny.

Without eating her.

Just the biscuits.

"Sure, give me your phone number and I'll call after I get home, then we can plan something."

I looked around.

Who just said that?

Sounded like Sasuke.

But it wasn't Sasuke.

Not my Sasuke.

And no way was he letting Neji write an assortment of numbers all over his hand.

"Cool. Catch you later then."

And with that, Neji turned away, his long ponytail flipping behind him.

And he was gone.

"Wha . . . What was-?"

"I tried to tell you over the phone, and then at Ralph's, but you, ya know," Sasuke replied without even listening to what I had started saying.

I could tell he hadn't.

It wasn't and answer, it was a statement.

"So . . . what's . . . I mean, what's between you and . . . that guy?"

"Friends, I guess. He was pretty cool when I caught up to him on my skateboard. Said I was pretty good. Pretty fast. I think you'd like him if you gave him a chance. Just like Shishou."

Yeah, just like Shishou.

Everyone liked him, said he was a pretty cat, but he always hated me.

It's not cats.

It's Shishou.

It's not the rest of the school.

It's Neji.

We walked to class in one of our comfortable silences.

One of those silences where we're both thinking, so it's OK to be quiet.

And so my plans for the afternoon were ruined.

It was thrift-store raiding day.

A Sasuke and Naruto tradition for Thursdays.

And there it went. I don't even think Sasuke remembered about it.

All for the prissy, Neji, jerk-ass, queeny.

Or weenie.

Whatever.

**TBC**

* * *

(2) B.C.E. (Before Common Era) equal B.C. C.E. (Common Era) equal A.D.

Hope you enjoyed it. Ruh-ruh-ruh-read on-nuh-nuh-nuh.


	4. Beginning

**Those Weird Feelings No One Ever Gets**

On a role. Got a semi-plot and everything.

* * *

You know those days that go from bad to worse, to the dumps, to, simply put, a smear of shit?

They never get better.

At least not for me.

But what would ever cause me to believe that that day would get any better?

First period, Mr. Sarutobi made Sasuke and me run the track all period, and if we didn't get at least six laps we had detention, since we were late for class.

No detention, but my legs never hurt more. (LIE.)

Second period, we got a lecture for not doing our History homework, and had to read the questions and answers out loud in order to 'learn'.

All I learned is that, even if I had done it, I would have gotten every question wrong anyway.

Homeroom, some kid pushed me from behind: The ass hole.

"What's this?" Sasuke grunted later as we walked down the hall.

I didn't respond but to stiffen as Sasuke snatched at my back.

"Labeled," he proclaimed, holding up a piece of paper by the tape so I could read it.

'Fruitilicious'.

Fanfuckingtastic with a fucking cherry on top.

And no fucking sugar. Believe me.

Fourth period, our blender blew up in my face and I was rightfully proclaimed as a 'Fruity Fruitilicious Fruit Smoothy'.

And anyone that said it got a royal punch in the face.

Fifth period, I cut too deep into the damn rat and a gob of blood spurted out at me from the heart.

And all I got was a tissue to clean it off my face until I could go to the bathroom.

Ew.

Sixth period, Mr. Nara kept picking on me to answer problems I didn't understand, and after a while I just kept saying x equaled 24.

By the end of class, pi suddenly equaled the square root of 24 over 59.

Or so the class declared in their confusion amidst the utter chaos.

So now it was lunch.

It was finally just Sasuke and me, floating on our abandoned table among a sea of grass and several trees.

I squeezed my juice box forcefully, egging on every last drop to slip through the straw and into my mouth.

When I pulled it away and shook it, several drops remained, and it only pissed me off more.

And now I was just about to stand up and cuss out my juice box for not giving up every last drop, down to the very last bit of vitamin c.

Thankfully, Sasuke started talking, and it kicked my temper down several notches.

"Fun day, eh?"

He peeled a pepperoni from his slice of pizza and held it up to my face.

"Need a hot bath?" he asked.

I sighed gloomily and pulled the offered topping from Sasuke's fingers with my teeth.

"More fun than a blanket of knives on a bed of swords in the middle of a gas-fueled wildfire, yeah," I mumbled fitting my face between my hands, elbows resting on the table despite my burning cuts.

"That sounds more kinky than anything."

He took a bite of pizza, avoiding the pepperonis.

"If you want, you could hang out with Neji and me after school. You know, to make you feel better or whatever," he said.

Peeling a pepperoni off the oily cheese as Sasuke brought the slice to his mouth once more, I thought it over.

I really didn't want to be around Neji.

I wanted to be with Sasuke, and only Sasuke.

But, despite the fact that I always tried to be honest with Sasuke, unless . . . I was purposely trying to lie, like, with good intent; I didn't want to say straight out that I didn't and wouldn't ever get along with his new friend and wanted to stay as far from him as I could.

What a slap in the face that would be.

So I just took my sweet time chewing my pepperoni, feeling out with my teeth to make sure I chewed every bit thoroughly, and every little piece of pepper.

Which left my mouth burning from the broken pepper bits.

A good enough stalling strategy; now I needed to drink some water to cool it down.

So I did.

But my mouth didn't feel any better.

Too bad that was the last drink we had.

"Uh, I don't think so," I said.

I watched the plastic water bottle roll off the table once I'd set it down.

"I . . . Eh, that Neji kid doesn't seem to like me."

Sasuke sighed, irked, and let the full impact of fainting hit me as he used me as a support.

Of course, he didn't really faint.

But it felt like it.

"Well, your loss," he grumbled.

His jaw movements felt strange against my shoulder.

I pressed a finger on the top of his head and pushed it away slowly.

"Not in my eyes."

It came out a bit more sourly than I had meant it to be.

The last thing I wanted was to make Sasuke feel bad.

The guy didn't need his life getting any worse.

First he loses his family in a fire.

Then his guardian, a nanny, died in a cooking accident right in front of his eyes.

Now he was alone, except for his brother, who was hardly around now that he was in college and had a job.

He didn't even consider Sasuke's house his home.

The last thing Sasuke needed was to get bad-mouthed by his best friend.

Granted, we tried to avoid pity, since we agreed we'd both went through just as bad of experiences.

But it gave me an excuse not to start yelling.

Because I was tired and gloomy and I just wanted to hang out with Sasuke at home, read a book or a magazine. Just be in his presence.

And that kid in my heart thought so too.

Still, I refuse to say that we are on equal basis because of this.

It's only one time.

And he's lame.

So I win.

Sasuke sighed and let his head droop, disguising it to look like he had merely looked down at our lunch

He reached out and grabbed something and popped it in his mouth.

I couldn't help but wonder what was going on in that beautifully gelled head of his.

He knew I wouldn't have a good time if I hung out with Neji, no matter if I hardly knew him or not.

And it was too selfish for my taste to want to shout things about friendship and tradition in Sasuke's face to make him feel bad.

Not my taste to want to, but I really did want to, nonetheless.

Badly.

Break some sense right past his three piercings and through his eardrums.

Thankfully, I didn't.

Though I sort of regret it now.

But not so much.

I just wonder if things would have gone faster if I'd taken that route.

"Lick?" said Sasuke.

I turned warily to face him, my mind not yet running around like crazy, shouting things about Sasuke's tongue.

"Ah," I nodded, understanding and sticking out my tongue.

With a pop, Sasuke pulled a green lollipop from his mouth.

For a split second, things were normal again, and my mouth hung open, and the candy came nearer.

Then I could see it.

Saliva.

Drool.

Mouth juices.

No matter how you say it, it sounds gross.

I'm used to it with Sasuke though.

I mean, come on, we're best friends, like brothers.

But at that moment, it was clear to me.

As that kid started shouting loud enough that it felt like my whole body vibrated.

Vibrated with the words, 'indirect' and, 'kiss'.

In that order.

I wanted to dodge it.

The lollipop, that is.

Really, nothing could stop me.

But my sense told me I was being stupid.

And that kid told me I was being unreasonable and unfair to him.

So I stayed put and let the taste of artificial lime and sugar fill my mouth.

"Oh! Oh, hey!"

I blinked and Sasuke's pale face mirrored mine.

We turned, the white stick parting from Sasuke's fingers and jetting from my lips like a cigarette.

I've felt my heart skip one beat, but I counted three that time.

Scarlet-brown hair wisped over the same aqua-green eyes that had burned into my mind since the moment I saw them.

The same face I was sure I'd never see again.

"Heh, 's choo!" I slurred from behind the lollipop.

The kid smiled slightly, but the emotion spread over his whole face and throughout his entire being.

I'm so poetic.

He stepped closer to our table, a clear hesitance towards Sasuke peeling from him like ancient paint, flaking and curling.

"Are your cuts any better?" he asked, running his long, elegant fingers over the black strap of his tote bag.

My hands found their way to my legs, pulling them to my chest, my shoes making tapping sounds on the edge of the hard, blue plastic bench.

"Oh, yeah!" I said.

I smiled with hopes that it would distract him from the prickling blush that was growing rapidly over my cheeks and nose.

"He'll live," said Sasuke indifferently.

Never able to keep out of my life.

But that was fine.

I needed his help any way.

Just not if he was going to sabotage things instead of build them with me.

The kid's smile flickered, and I couldn't tell he hadn't expected Sasuke to speak to him.

"So," I said, rolling the lollipop around in my mouth out of nerves, "You . . . I never caught your name."

"Probably because he never told you," Sasuke said.

An automatic response.

I elbowed him in the ribs and flashed a smile at the red-haired kid.

He smiled back.

Speaking over the grumbles and curses that bubbled forth from Sasuke's lips like a boiling pot, the kid said, "Gaara."

I blinked.

I was just about to question his last name, when his added, "_Just_ Gaara."

Such a small and simple smile, but it radiated, like neon in a dark window, over his face.

"Fascinating . . . " Sasuke drawled.

H pulled the lollipop from my mouth and flung it around lazily.

"Shush!" I hissed, stomping on his toe.

He ripped out a yelp of pain and turned his back on me, sticking out his tongue.

I turned back to Gaara once more, my eyes still narrowed at Sasuke.

Then my eyes swung back over to Gaara.

He looked sort of like he was going to twitch and shout bloody murder at Sasuke any moment.

But at the same time, oddly attracted to the two of us.

Not in a sexual way, just drawn to us, I guess.

"Anyway," I started, kind of awkwardly, "You . . . ya know, wanna sit down? We have Skittles if you want any."

"Not green Skittles . . . " Sasuke mumbled.

"Be sure to eat all the green ones," I said with a wicked smile.

Sasuke likes green Skittles best.

I like red.

I never touch the green ones.

He never touches the red ones.

I'm evil.

"Well, I was actually heading for . . . well, I don't know . . . "

No makey sensing.

"I mean, I'm new here, and I was hoping to join the drama club, but I don't know where it is."

"Oh, is that why you were so late when I ran into you this morning?"

That was the first time I used the term 'ran into you' in a literal sense.

"Room 502, through those doors, take a right, down the hall, another right, and it'll be on the left side. Good luck. Happy trails. Buh-bye, now."

Wow.

Sasuke normally keeps his cool, but now he was so irritated he was standing up with his palms down on the table.

The muscles in his arms and hands tightened.

His fingers scratched over the blue paint on the table in rage.

I could sense Gaara was insulted by Sasuke's behavior.

He remained calm despite.

"Yeah, thanks . . . uh . . . "

Sasuke plopped back down, folding his arms and keeping his head down, bangs over his eyes.

"Sasuke," I supplied for Gaara sheepishly.

I felt like a bad dog owner whose black lab just snapped at someone's hand.

"And . . . I'm Naruto. Uzumaki Naruto."

A smile twisted over Gaara's features, forced and painful, but a smile non-the-less.

"Thanks . . . I guess I'll see you around . . . "

He paused.

It was obvious he wanted to make it clear he only wanted to see me 'around'.

But he stopped himself; nodded like we hadn't just almost become friends.

And there he went.

With a puff of anger I turned sharply in my seat.

Like a five year old might, I shoved at Sasuke with both hands.

With a loud, "Ack!" he slipped from the bench and face first onto the ground.

Once he was back in his seat Sasuke refolded his arms and just pouted for the remainder of lunch.

No matter how many times I tried to shout, then say, then plead some sense into him.

No use.

Maybe I'm just dense, but I couldn't begin to fathom what was wrong in the first place.

But despite that, we still walked to English class together.

And still snickered behind Miss Yuuhi's back when Inuzuka Kiba, this kid in the front row, got a peek under her skirt.

He gave the class a reassuring thumbs-up.

And we still sat next to each other in computer class.

Where things started getting sloppy again.

Sloppi_er_.

Shoot me before I have to relive it.

I mean it.

Take a gun and hold it to my head and pull the trigger.

No?

Fine.

You suck.

Anyway.

So we marched in, as always.

Dumped our stuff under the desk.

Sat down.

Turned on our computers.

The works.

And in strolled Mr. Hatake.

I find it comical how he's always late.

And he was whistling.

And I'd heard the song before.

And he took a seat at his desk, waiting for us to get settled in.

And he started singing . . .

"So take me back to Constantinople!"

And the whole class, save Sasuke, turned to look.

"No you can't go back to Constantinople!"

A few kids whispered.

"Istanbul, not Constantinople!"

A few kids giggled.

"Why did Constantinople get the works?"

And he pointed at someone to sing.

And that someone was Sasuke.

Who, and everyone saw this one coming, did not even know he was being pointed at.

So, with a smirk, I waited, and in a moment, Mr. Hatake was pointing at me.

And so I sang.

"That's nobody's business but the-"

I was seriously on a role, too.

I mean, I thought I sounded pretty good.

And who walks in?

I had completely forgotten he had this class as teacher assistant.

But there he was in all his _manly_ glory.

Glaring at me like I was doing a worldly wrong.

Like, littering or tagging a bus.

I think I would be on the right track to say he hates me.

A lot.

I mean, I hate most vegetables, but when I say he hates me, I mean . . .

Like, beyond broccoli.

With no reason.

I think.

And I hope.

Because that gives me reason to hate him back.

So my happy is totally ruined.

And it only took a few seconds.

And that's not all!

If you act now, you will get fifty percent off my sorrow and a free hunk of my gloom!

And a slap in the face.

Or, a slap in my face.

The bell rang and there was a mad rush to get out of the classroom as if a million lab mice had just been set free.

But Sasuke and I: We took our sweet, sweet time.

And I remembered then that it would finally be just the two of us.

Sanctuary.

It was so relieving, I actually let out a nice long sigh as I zipped up my backpack and headed out of the classroom behind Sasuke, my roller blades in my hands.

"Sasuke, wait up."

You know, if I were Sasuke, I wouldn't wait up, no matter what, but in the least he could expect Neji to use a more excited tone.

Say it like you mean it!

'Sasuke, my dear, my fine-ass-love-of-my-life, wait just a moment, sweets, and once I catch up, you will never have to wait again, for I will be the one; waiting on you hand and foot! Oh dear, let me carry your backpack, love!'

'No, insignificant fool! Bow down to me so I can give you a nice fine kick on the back end!'

I slumped in despair as visions of Neji, in a maid outfit, frolicking around after Sasuke, popped into my head.

I listened to each footstep.

Each tap of the shoe was like pins sticking into my ear.

And knives sticking into my stomach.

I almost felt like yanking him by that overly conditioned ponytail and tossing him down the hall behind us and jetting off without a trace.

But I'm too good a person.

"We're still on for after school?" Neji asked once he reached Sasuke's side.

The the side opposite I was on.

And now I felt like a Sasuke underling.

In pink shorts . . .

"Yeah, but I still have to head home first."

"Hn . . . What if I went with you until we got to your house?"

"Which way do you live?"

The rage built up inside, and I was really ready to explode.

Like, really ready, for the first time in a long time.

Ready for someone to set a bomb on me and see which went off sooner.

Me or the bomb.

And finally, it was slowly leaking out,.

My fists tightened around my backpack straps.

My knuckles went from tan to yellow to white.

I told myself it would be a bad idea, but I looked up at Sasuke, fire erupting in my eyes.

And when I did, my heart gave a flutter.

"My house is that way," Neji said, pointing to the left as we stepped out the front exit doors.

Which was the way the two of us lived.

"Oh, we live that way . . . " Sasuke said, pointing right, "Eh, we can board, or scooter, you know, when we catch up later."

I know I said I hate remembering this, but that moment . . .

I don't mind recalling it once and a while.

"Well, call me, OK?" said Neji, tapping down the steps and grabbing his scooter.

He had very little emotion in his voice.

"Yeah," said Sasuke, making his way over to his secret bush.

I almost missed it when I looked down at my skates to tie them.

And I really wish I had.

Wish I had just kept my head down a couple more seconds.

It was swift and his lips hardly touched skin.

However, it was obvious that my eyes didn't deceive me.

The second kiss Sasuke had gotten from Neji.

On the cheek.

Sasuke seemed just as surprised as I was.

And with gaping mouths we both watched as Neji rode off, waving merrily at Sasuke.

Though Sasuke missed the snide look and too-cool-for-you hair flip he gave me.

Oh, he was going down.

Along with every manicured finger nail that I just know he must have.

**TBC**

* * *

I like Sasuke as a not-avenger. He's different then his ninja self, but I don't think his OOCness is too bad.

Just read chapter 350. Is Suigetsu not the cutest thing since Naruto and Kiba or am I the only one? And when he has his tooth sticking out . . .

It's love


	5. Muffin

**Those Weird Feelings No One Ever Gets **

So the first of way too much angst begins.

After this story I'm going to write a lot of cute, lovey-dovey fluff to make up for all this.

* * *

"Did you want fries with that?"

"Do you have any?"

"Can . . . ah, shoot!"

Drew smacked the buzzer.

The audience roared with laughter as Wayne cracked his paper-white smile and trotted back up to where Chip stood, laughing along with the hundreds of others.

The four men plopped back into their red-cushioned chairs.

All with smiles, some still laughing.

"That's a million points each to Wayne and Collin," Drew declared to the world, "'Who's Line is it Anyway?' back in a second!"

I watched with drooping eyes as the snack fairy appeared on the screen, sitting on a giant Fig Newton.

With a sigh, I pulled the remote from the crack between the couch and hit the power button.

And collapsed onto the couch.

Not a thing had come up that excited me in any way since I left school with Sasuke.

I felt like asking him why he had lied to Neji like that, just to confirm it, but every time I opened my mouth to speak I blushed terribly.

So, the whole way home, down the street, going the wrong way, and turning back around later, we were silent.

And for once, it was awkward, like we were skating through molasses with no clothes on and Sasuke had just proposed using a spool of thread.

And though he looked normal, expressionless, I knew, just by standing near him, that Sasuke was just as shaken as I was.

My stomach grumbled and I rolled off the couch, falling hard onto the yellow-beige carpet.

Protesting at my slow pace, my stomach roared and clawed.

I almost began telling it to be patient, but I didn't.

As I drug myself into the kitchen, I made up a plan.

I would get myself a plate of Oreos and some milk.

I'd listen to some music while I read my book, "Things Not Seen," and ate my Oreos.

Then bed.

The milk splashed and swirled like a raging ocean of white as I poured it into a tall glass

After tossing several cookies on my plate, I headed back into the "family" room.

I was just on the part when Alicia was finding out Bobby was invisible when the phone rang.

I set my book open side down on my knee and grabbed the phone.

"Hello?"

My voice barely came out, not having displayed itself for the past, nearly, nine hours.

"I will give you one week," the person on the other line breathed out, rough and scratchy, "Stay away from the Uchiha and no one gets hurt."

"Who the hell are you?" I asked as if asking if he had any CDs I could burn.

The voice seemed vaguely familiar, but definitely different than whom I was thinking.

But still the same as the first time he called.

He'd hung up on 'hell' and I tossed the phone back onto my coffee table, turning back to my book.

'said Alicia.'

I think I read that line about thirty times.

My eyes were on the book; my brain was on the phone call.

Said Alicia.

It just had to be Neji.

Said Alicia.

It sounded nothing like him.

Said Alicia.

But who else would want me away from Sasuke?

Said Alicia.

Alicia? No . . . I didn't know any Alicias . . .

At last, I stuck my bookmark into my book and tossed it on the couch, finally slumping into my room.

Nearly suffocating myself under the covers.

It was instinct reaction to a phone call like that.

I couldn't even look out the window without expecting to see a large ax and narrow, red eyes glaring in at me.

I had a dream about Sasuke and Neji that night.

Sasuke was Bobby and Neji was Alicia.

Except Sasuke wasn't invisible.

And as he walked down the street, naked, with Neji, Neji holding out a long white cane and wearing big black glasses, holding Sasuke's elbow.

It was the scene in which Bobby pulled Alicia from the kid with the scooter.

And it played over and over in my head.

But instead of Alicia smacking her hand against Bobby's bare chest, it was Neji, hand gripping insecurely at Sasuke's toned muscles.

I woke to the howl of 'Punk Rock 101' and didn't manage to comprehend until, _Same song, different chorus..._

I rolled over to face my bedside table and snatched at my phone, flipping it open hastily.

"Hello?"

"What's for breakfast, Sleeping Beauty?"

With a snuff, I squinted at the clock.

Six fifty-five.

"You're not going to leave me alone until you're positive I'm out of bed and won't fall back to sleep, am I right?"

Sasuke scoffed, "Why would I have that in mind? I simply wished to speak to my precious and oh so dear best friend for a friendly chat is all."

"Alright," I sighed, swinging my legs over the side of my bed and stepping onto the carpet, "I'm out of bed."

"Of course, I do like spending time with my dear friend, but I wouldn't ever force him out of bed at such an early hour."

"I'm getting dressed," I said, pulling off my pajama bottoms and jumping into my gray jeans and tightening the already looped belt around my waist.

"Hope you're planning on something like yesterday," said Sasuke.

I could picture him looking coolly at his nails.

I pulled on a white shirt with a black design on it.

Once my head was out in the air again I said, "I'm deciding whether or not to burn those."

"Why don't you wear them sometime and you can leave them in my room again?"

"I don't thi-"

"Oh, gotta go, Neji's here, I'll meet you out front on the steps, ok? Loves. Later."

And he hung up.

The phone slid from my shoulder and clattered to the floor.

Sasuke had never had to stop a phone call with me because of someone else.

Even when his brother came to visit, he would just say to hold on a second.

And then I'd hear him telling his brother about how he had called someone for the purpose of talking to them, not to other people in the room and to wait until he was done.

I wasn't mad.

No, I was slowly passing the anger phase.

I was suddenly sad.

Sad and rejected.

But despite that, it hid behind fury, letting my anger eat off of it to grow to its maximum.

Neji.

What was it about him?

Both Sasuke and I had known him for such a short, short period of time.

What was it that Sasuke had heard; had seen that I hadn't?

Was he really so great?

So great that Sasuke could suddenly take time from his life, from me, to be with him instead?

I had always been Sasuke's only thing to think about.

We had been for each other, specially made for one another and no one else.

And now it was like, instead of two stars, just fine being alone, there was now a planet orbiting Sasuke, and I couldn't get my light past it willy-nilly, and it took all his attention from me.

And I refused to orbit Sasuke like I was his property or play thing or something.

We were equals and if that meant me telling it to him straight out, then god damn, that's what I'd do.

And now I sound like his wife; his angry wife.

But do you think I noticed while I was pulling on my socks in a rage?

I wouldn't have cared even if I had.

Slinging my backpack over my shoulder, I bustled out of my room and stopped in the family room, where I'd left my skates.

I was just nearly out of the lobby when she called me.

"Oh, deary, how are you this morning?"

Hellacious timing, Miss Carson. (3)

I stopped with my head down, not even beginning to wonder what happened with Old Dude.

"Fine."

"Did you have a good breakfast, sweetie?"

"No. I didn't have any."

"Oh, dear! Then come, come! I have some cinnamon-raisin muffins right here! Here, take one, yes, that's a good boy, now get off to school and become a doctor! That's it! And getting your exercise at the same time, good boy!"

As I rolled slowly down the sidewalk, I picked moodily at my muffin, flicking the raisins to the ground and making sure not to role over them.

And I didn't even notice when I got to the school, and, like I was programmed to do it, I turned into the school yard and up to the steps.

"Yo."

I looked up from my muffin to find Sasuke, not even three inches from my face.

"Ah!" I screamed, stumbling backward and falling to my rump.

"Jesus, don't scare me like that, you bastard!" I panted.

Sasuke smirked and held out a hand to help me up.

"'See we're back to G-rated clothing," said Sasuke, eyeing my outfit carefully as I pulled off my skates and pushed them into my backpack.

"And clothing that doesn't go against dress-code."

I flinched and nearly broke my backpack zipper in irritation.

What was _he_ still doing here?

"Let's get to Mr. Hatake's class," Sasuke decided, standing from the cement step.

"Hn." Neji nodded, folding his arms.

Shaking with anger, I stood from the steps and pointed a finger angrily at Neji, "Don't you nod like you're coming with us!"

"Why wouldn't I come?" Neji asked, raising a not-really-this-interested eyebrow.

"Because!" I shouted, "You're not . . . You're not one of us! We don't even know you! You're totally ruining-"

I felt a hand wrap around my wrist to stop me from flailing at least one of my arms.

"Naru, calm down. You have to get to know new people once and a while," Sasuke said calmly.

Remember what I said about bombs and blowing up?

Boom.

"Don't you preach me that shit!" I roared, snatching my hand away fiercely, "I started making a new friend, and you went and fucking ruined it! If you don't like my new friends, than I don't have to like yours! What the hell has been into you lately? All it's been is this freak show! What happened to us? _Us_? Like thrifting, and hanging out; just us? Did it take that little of time for you to forget?"

Sasuke's brow furrowed and he began to reach a hand forward, but I couldn't even stand to look at him.

"Naru..."

And that was it. My hand squeezed tightly around my half eaten muffin.

One might wonder where I would put all those crumbs, since I wasn't hungry or feeding birds.

Why, Sasuke's hair of course.

And with that, I pushed past him, and made sure to walk straight at Neji and shove him to the ground and step on his ankle, and hurried through the front doors and rushed down the hall in the direction of the boys' bathroom.

God, why did I do that? I know very well I'm capable of talking things out calmly.

At least I got to step on Neji.

Wish I could have stayed to watch it.

"Hey!" someone yelped.

And then I ran into them.

Paper's tumbled from the kid's arms and rained over me as I started gathering myself up from the floor.

"Sorry," I mumbled, leaning down to pick up the papers. Several gray spots appeared on them as I brought them into my hands, and I dropped them all at once.

I was crying.

Again.

Suddenly I was alone. Just me, in a dark room, constantly filling with the tears that fell from my eyes until there was no air.

Just tears.

And all I could do was stare down at my hands as they caught my tears before they slipped away and hit the ground.

"Don't worry about these," was what brought me back, and I looked up, "I was just about to recycle them, so it's OK."

My blurring eyes widened as the pale face looked up from the papers, no smile, but happy in a pleasant way that had to be sensed, not seen.

"Gaara . . . " I choked out, my fingers reaching my cheeks.

His eyes narrowed, "Crying?"

I rubbed frantically at my face and shook my head.

He stood and, without a word, grabbed my hand, pulling me to my feet.

And he dropped his papers again as he wrapped his arms around me in a hug.

Then it was over.

Like it was an accident or something.

"What happened?" he asked as we gathered his papers one last time.

I shook my head again and he pursed his lips but said nothing.

We stood at the same time, arms full of papers.

With a blush crawling over my cheeks, I dumped my papers into his arms and brought my hands back in to rub my eyes again and sniff loudly.

Gaara stared sorrowfully at me.

I really couldn't stand him looking at me while I was like this.

Especially with that expression.

"You want to bring these papers out back with me?"

It was a strange way to do it, but I could tell he was trying to comfort me.

So, without a word, I held out my arms and took half the pile and we walked down the halls in silence.

And amidst that silence, I was thinking.

Expecting Sasuke to pop up behind me.

Help me carry the papers.

Then we'd head back to Mr. Hatake's room after we were done helping Gaara.

He'd crack a joke or two about the muffin in his hair.

I'd laugh and Mr. Hatake would crack a joke about it too and leave the room, and that would be that.

But he didn't.

"Thanks for helping me out, they were all getting kind of heavy," said Gaara as we walked back the way we had come, our arms free of paper now.

"No problem," I said, trying my best to smile, "Hey, you never told me if you made it in the drama club."

"Oh, yeah, I did. They're a lot of-"

The bell rang and drowned out his voice.

"Oh! Gotta get to geometry! I'll see you later," he shouted.

"Yeah," I said, waving as he headed down the hall.

I kind of felt like just plopping down in the middle of the hall and crying.

Maybe the guidance counselor would think I'd gone nuts and send me home.

That's what I wanted, really.

To just go home and never come out ever again.

No.

What I really wanted was to wake up.

I wanted this all to be a dumb dream that Sasuke and I could joke about when we got to school.

And I wanted Neji to walk into eighth period after I woke up.

Then he'd end up telling us he was a girl.

A girl who thought Sasuke and I were undesirable dorks.

And she'd leave us alone.

But I kept wide-awake, and yet nothing changed.

And Sasuke was continuously brushing crumbs out of his hair as we stood side by side in the locker room.

I was just about to walk around him to get to class, when, as he pulled on his shirt, something, or more like some_one_, triggered in my heart, and tears burst over, my bottom lip quivering like it would on thirty Fahrenheit days.

Sasuke started looking up, like he was going to say something that he had planned for hours.

And then he stopped.

I couldn't help it really.

I just couldn't stay mad at him.

In our relationship it was make-up now, talk it out later.

So I'm sure he wasn't the least bit surprised when I stumbled closer and gripped his shirt sleeve, letting my tears soak into it.

I'd never been more happy to have those strong arms around me.

And, unseen and hidden by Sasuke's shirt and embrace, was a smile.

Because I knew, no matter how long it took, this would end well.

"On the bright side, it wasn't, like, gum or anything," said Sasuke as we ate lunch, side be side, elbow to elbow.

Like always.

"You deserve the gum more," I pointed out, a piece of fish stick falling from my mouth.

Stretching and laying his head across my lap, Sasuke just sighed and closed his eyes.

"You . . . " I started, but I decided we still had the rest of our lives to have this oh so important discussion I needed so desperately to get out of the way.

"Me . . . ?"

"You have a little bit of crumb right there," I said, trying not to sound like I had had to make it up.

I flicked at a spot in his hair just around the part line of his bangs.

Flicked hard.

For good measure.

"Hey . . . " someone said, someone familiar, and I looked up curiously, "Can I sit with you two?"

I smiled brightly at Gaara and looked down at Sasuke, who was starting to sit up.

"Sure," I said merrily.

Sasuke was up, and I felt like a girl talking to her dad and waiting for approval of her prom date.

He nodded.

Well, it was better than Sasuke pulling a snide remark or ignoring him altogether.

I was sure he'd say something like, 'I don't know, do you have an ass dysfunction? Because, if so, that's probably a no.'

And it wasn't half bad.

I was basically the only one talking.

Sasuke appeared indifferent, but I knew he was listening.

Gaara just nodded once and a while, his eyes wandering as he took in the scene of his new school.

Things were shaping up.

I guess.

The rest of the day went smoothly.

Neji had to file a lot of papers last period, so we left without saying a word to him.

Sasuke hung out at my house and we played Mario Kart for a while.

Sasuke kept winning and I kept getting stuck in the sand-whirl-pool-thing at the desert track.

And at long last, we were just hanging out in my room, talking, when there was a long silence.

And it kept going.

I don't even know where it came from.

But there it was, just a stretch of noiseless time.

Until . . .

"I'm sorry."

Blinking, I rolled over on the carpet to looked up at Sasuke, lying on the bed and staring at the ceiling.

"I've never had to try and deal with two friends at once. I guess I just didn't know how to keep things balanced."

He didn't move.

He just lay with his legs bent so his feet were flat on the mattress, his hands behind his head.

He tried to act like he was too cool; like he didn't care.

But I knew better.

I knew he couldn't look me in the eye.

He didn't blush, but it was obvious.

He was embarrassed.

I smiled lightly and laid back on my back again.

"It's OK . . . " I said.

Though that was a lie.

It hadn't been OK and it never would be.

But he apologized.

So I didn't think it would matter.

"Naruto."

"Yeah?"

That kid who used to hand out in my heart hadn't been around lately . . .

"Have I ever told you how much I love you?"

And I had been getting so used to the peaceful silence of him not running around like a mad man . . .

**TBC**

* * *

(3): Hellacious: Stole that word from my dad.

To flower.pot: Such a long review and I couldn't even reply! Thanks for the advice; funny that you said that thing about Itachi being protective; that was my main idea for him. I have to have him in here: I love that guy. So pretty. I'm half tempted to throw Kisame in here too.

And Kisame shouldn't be the only person with bad teeth . . . I mean . . . He did say he thinks Suigetsu is cute . . . (That's only one of the many things Kisame and I have in common.)

Thanks to all that critique me: I'm bad at taking advice, but if you lay it on lightly, I may not freak out.


	6. The Kiss

**Those Weird Feelings No One Ever Gets **

I've gotten a lot of ideas for this story, so hopefully it won't end as soon as I thought it would.

And I've gotten a part for Suigetsu.

Ah, yes, I can't wait to have him in here.

* * *

"L . . . love?" I tried to say, but my voice cracked and whined, and it came out as nothing more than a bunch of slurred stutters.

Sasuke stood from the bed and stared out the window for a few seconds, until, at last, he said, "I wish the whole world could know that you're the most important thing to me, ever."

He turned to look at me, his face stony and blank, but his eyes smiling a million smiles.

I attempted once more to speak, but it was quite fruitless.

Lips twitching to smile, Sasuke stepped forward in my direction.

Each step seemed to be in slow motion: nearer and nearer, until he was hovering right over me.

He looked to the door.

He looked back at me.

"My brother will be over soon. I guess that means I better get home."

My heart crashed and burned.

"Maybe I'll see you tomorrow, if my brother doesn't hog all my time."

He ruffled my hair and turned away, and out the door.

I sat motionless except for my chest, heaving with anxiety. My face burned and stung with a shade of red.

The front door slammed.

My heart pounded like mad, and my head throbbed.

Everything. It was all insane.

The days went by. I didn't visit Sasuke that weekend. I didn't go anywhere or do anything.

Life was OK. Just OK.

I had thought life was just OK a while back, but now, compared, life with just Sasuke and me seemed like a long lost heaven.

Now . . .

It was OK.

Gaara ate lunch with us everyday.

I talked, Gaara listened, and Sasuke sat.

Once in a while, one of them would have something to say, but it was seldom.

Wednesday, Gaara announced that the drama club would be holding a play.

And it was no surprise to hear him say it was, "Romeo and Juliet".

He told us he'd gotten the part of Friar Lawrence.

And he kept on talking, and for once he seemed quite ecstatic, though less jumpy than me when I got that excited.

Then Sasuke spoke.

And it was like God had just come down to earth to say something to this fucked up world.

I was nearly leaning forward with awe.

"When do tickets go on sale?"

"Next Monday."

"Cool."

Doesn't seem like much? Oh, it was the world to me.

And it reminded me . . .

Everything reminded me . . .

Every word he said to me, every time he set even a finger on me, everything . . .

It reminded me that I was the world to him . . .

It made me confused but . . .

I was always smiling around him then.

And the days went on.

And at last, it was Friday again. Sasuke's brother had picked him up, and offered me a ride, maybe bring us bowling, but I declined.

So I was cuddled up under my blanket on the couch, the wind howling outside, a storm most certainly heading in, and I was watching "Foster's Home For Imaginary Friends," and Bloo was just messing up on Berry's name again, when the phone rang.

"Hello?" I said, tearing my eyes from the TV screen.

"You were warned . . ." said person on the other line, "I gave you a week . . . And you still remain with the Uchiha . . . "

My eyes widened and my hands trembled, and in a flash, I dropped then phone.

I didn't even bother to shut or lock my house door.

Not even a second to put on my shoes or blades.

I was just running; running down the hall, running out of the elevator, running through the lobby, running down the street.

Running to Sasuke.

My breathing was labored and my head was spinning, but I made it to Sasuke's, and was running as fast as I could to the door, when I bumped into someone, causing me to fall down.

I looked up with teary eyes to find an older version of Sasuke staring down at me.

"Why, if it isn't Naruto."

I smiled painfully. "Hey, 'tachi," I said, struggling to my feet.

"What's your rush?" he asked.

This is where Sasuke got his I-could-care-less attitude.

But Itachi; Itachi was the king of not caring.

You see, when he spoke, you really wondered why he was asking and why you should answer, seeing as he certainly could not care less.

"Uh . . . " I twisted the purple cotton of my shirt. "Some . . . eh . . . some guy . . . "

"Some guy has threatened to come after you for hanging out with Sasuke, so you came here and hoped they wouldn't find you?"

I must have looked so weird right then: baffled.

Does not compute.

"How . . . Wh-who . . . ?"

"Kisame." I looked to the left, like I expected the man to be standing right there, and then looked back at Itachi.

"Why?" I asked, startled and stumbling backward. "Are . . . are you . . . ?"

"It was entertaining," Itachi said, rather bored with the whole thing. "Anyway, why don't you come in, I just made cookies."

As I followed behind Itachi, through the doors and into the large house, I couldn't even laugh at the thought of Itachi wearing an apron and scurrying around the kitchen, baking . . .

It was like I'd been hit over the head with a pan.

All that worrying . . . and it was all a joke.

"Just head on in the kitchen; Kisame can get you some milk. I have to call my professors to confirm when school lets back in."

I nodded silently and followed the long but familiar hallway to the kitchen, plopping down in one of the wooden chairs like always.

"Hey, kiddo," said Kisame happily. "You get our calls?"

I smiled sarcastically. "Ha ha and fucking ha."

"Aren't you too young to be talking like that?" asked Kisame, setting out a plate in front of me. "Did you want some cookies?"

"You guys are perfect examples of that," I commented, rolling my eyes. "What kind are they?"

"Oatmeal-peanut butter," he said. "We don't do it that much, do we?"

"Sure, I'll have some," I said. "Come on, are you kidding me? That's basically where I learnt it. My dad never cursed."

"Not in front of _you_," said Kisame, setting three cookies on my plate. "Milk?"

"Sure." Once the glass was out in front of me, I added, "How long did you two know my dad anyway?"

"He was our teacher when we were in sixth grade, and we always went to visit him in seventh, so, about two years. It was during our summer vacation that . . . you know . . . He always loved kids."

I smiled down at my glass of milk, several cookie crumbs floating around in it after my first dip.

I didn't want him back; that would be creepy.

But I missed him . . .

I must have looked like I was ready to drown myself in my milk, because Kisame sounded a bit worried when he said, "Did you come over to see Sasuke?"

I was ready to say no; I came over to hide behind him, but I didn't want to go into detail about how I nearly wet myself when I was sure someone was coming over to get a knife into my gut.

"Uh, yeah," I said, picking up the last cookie on my plate and standing from my chair.

"He's in his room. But he's got-- "

"Thanks, Kisame," I said, smiling and walking out of the room, catching his sharp, toothy smile as I left.

I don't know why I interrupted. I guess I didn't want to know. Or maybe I wanted to find out on my own.

I'm still debating with myself whether I would have rather heard from Kisame or the way I did.

"Hey, Sasuke," I said, opening the door to his room, "'tachi let me in. What's-- ?"

Oh.

Wow . . .

So intimate . . . I don't think he heard me until I slammed the door and slapped myself against the wall in horror.

Yeah, I knew then what Kisame was going to say.

"He's got a friend over."

Friend?

Oh no, that's not what friends do in their spare time.

I think I felt myself throw up a little.

Yeah, I'm over reacting. I sound like they were having sex or something.

But would _you_ be able to stay calm if you walked in on your best friend making out with your newest enemy?

Neji, sitting on Sasuke's lap, with his tongue shoved down his throat.

I'm sure you would have gone mad as well.

Considering he had told me . . .

What Sasuke . . . What he'd told me . . .

Love? What kind of love? For a while, I had thought he meant love . . . like . . . a couple might.

You wouldn't imagine how foolish I felt once I was out of that room.

The doorknob to Sasuke's room started to shake, and out of my apprehension, I dashed down the hall and back into the kitchen, where Itachi stood, leaning against the counter with a cup of coffee; Kisame stirring milk into his own steaming mug.

Itachi stopped in the middle of a conversation about some kind of new exhibit in the art gallery down by their University.

"Naruto," he said, turning to me.

Kisame turned as well, "Need something, kiddo?"

I felt my whole being, including my entire body, shake. Every one of my fingernails and every tear that was about to fall.

It all shook.

How could I have been so stupid? To think Sasuke loved me enough to want me as a boyfriend or something.

What an idiot.

We were friends.

Like brothers.

Of course; I was the one doing wrong all along, starting to get romantic thoughts about Sasuke.

Now it was obvious; how could I not see it before?

Sasuke loved Neji. Duh...

Though . . . love . . . That was a little early for two people who only knew each other for such a short time.

Still, for Sasuke to think of Neji as a boyfriend and not me . . .

I could understand.

But though I could understand, I was so shaken; I was literally on my knees, fingers gripping at the ground, hoping for something to hold, needing someone near.

I was in a state of absolute shock.

"Hey, kiddo," I heard Kisame say. So far, far away, when he was really kneeling down right next to me, his hand on my back.

I took deep breaths, trying to let it soak in. But, like a sponge, there's a point where you just can't take in much more.

And as I breathed, I could smell the faint scent of Sasuke. But it wasn't Sasuke. No, it was Itachi.

"Naruto," said Itachi, lifting up my face so he could see my eyes. "Can you stand up?"

I was trying so hard to listen, to reply, but it was like I was so far away, locked up, in a mold of rubber, not able to move.

But I managed to shake my head no.

No, I was trying to stand as they spoke, but it was even difficult just to shake my head.

I didn't notice my tears streaming down my face, more and faster than they had ever before.

Then, far away, I heard Itachi say something about carrying me home, and then I was lifted off the ground.

So out of touch, it was like I was floating.

It was Kisame. I could just tell. I don't know how.

I just could.

"Naruto!"

I squeezed my eyes tight.

Sasuke.

I knew that voice anywhere, anytime, any place.

I felt the soft clothe of Kisame's button up shirt in my fingers as I gripped it in distress.

Itachi was talking to Sasuke, calmly, saying something about shock and to leave me alone for a while.

I turned my head towards Kisame.

I felt eyes on me.

Burying my face in Kisame's shirt, I let the outside air brush over me, the world nothing but the sense of smell, sound, feel, and taste.

Seeing hurt too much.

The whole trip home, I cried.

For an hour, lying in bed with Kisame's presence, I cried.

I felt myself cry as I drifted into something like sleep, but still quite conscious of the world around me.

When Itachi came back, I was still crying.

Rolling onto my side to face them, I watched, like I was watching a movie, as Kisame, sitting on the edge of my bed, spoke in a hushed voice with Itachi, who had himself perched, one leg crossed over the other, on the rolling-chair near my computer desk.

" . . . didn't say he even came into the room," Itachi was saying. "He said he heard him shut the door though."

"What were they doing?"

"He wouldn't say."

Making out, of course.

Sucking face.

What else?

"Naruto," said Itachi without even looking at me. "Did you sleep well?"

Busted.

For what? I don't know, but I felt like I'd been caught doing wrong.

I sat up on my sheets, tears still leaking slowly out of my eyes.

"Yes," I said softly, tracing over the threads in my jeans with my eyes.

The mattress shifted as Kisame stood up. "Did you want to tell us what happened?"

Rubbing my face with my open hands, I shook my head, wiping my tears on my blankets. "It . . . it was nothing."

Kisame sighed and turned to Itachi for guidance.

"Go check on Sasuke and his boyfriend, Kisame."

I didn't hear much of what happened next.

I knew Itachi had stood and Kisame had left.

But my mind was now tightly wrapped around one word.

Boyfriend.

Itachi always knew very well what he was saying. He never said anything illogical. I'd never been lied to by him.

Boyfriend.

His boyfriend.

Sasuke's boyfriend.

Neji.

Perhaps he was making assumptions?

Or is that the way Sasuke introduced Neji?

Or, with all hopes, Neji introduced himself like that?

"Can you stand?" Itachi asked, back facing me.

I took a deep, rumbling breath and slid from the bed onto my feet.

"Good. How about we go out and talk for a while? I've been told the Baskin' Robbins down the street is good."

Stepping forward, I nodded. He wasn't looking, but I knew Itachi saw.

I don't know how, but it's an Itachi thing, I guess.

Chocolate.

I got chocolate.

I don't remember thinking anything other than that I was going to get, that I was about to choose, and that I was sitting down with chocolate ice cream.

And I stared at it.

So hard, I think it started melting faster.

"Sasuke told me."

I looked up at Itachi, stirring his smoothie with the straw.

Silence.

"He told me about what he said to you last week. About how he loved you."

My spoon stopped half way to my mouth.

"What . . . ?"

He continued as if this meant nothing. "He told me exactly how he meant it. He said he knew you'd be confused about what he had said."

My red eyes looked on in a pleading way. "How . . . ?"

Itachi stared. So hard, it was like he was staring right at one point on me, trying to burn a hole through it.

Then the smallest and faintest of smiles found its way to his lips.

"I'm going to let you find out."

"But . . . " I began, looking back down at my half empty cup of ice cream, cheeks reddening. "He was . . . he and Neji . . . "

"I know. They were kissing."

It sliced through me like a sword. The brutal, unkind truth.

"Sasuke is a special kind of person. You know this. Things will work out."

He said it like he already knew what was going to happen between us.

"But . . . " it's all that I could manage to say, "But . . . "

Itachi stood from his stool and took a sip of his smoothie, then heading for the door.

I scurried along behind him until we were walking side by side down the sidewalk.

"How about you come over for dinner on Wednesday?" said Itachi, tossing his empty plastic cup in a trashcan as we passed it.

I pulled my spoon from my mouth and placed it in my ice cream cup.

What was I supposed to say?

No.

Of course, that's exactly what I'd say.

To eat a whole meal with Sasuke, in his house, just four people?

And the whole point of that meal would be to get us together, right?

So I was going to say no.

I was _not_ about to do anything more idiotic.

I was going to only hang out with Gaara, I was going to change my phone numbers, and never answer my door to an Uchiha again.

I was . . .

"Sure, I'll come."

I was . . .

Hopeless.

And now I was also stuck going to dinner at Sasuke's four days from then.

Formal.

A formal dinner, Itachi had declared on our way back to my apartment.

I was hopeless, a goner, an idiot, broken hearted, and had to get a tuxedo by Wednesday.

Itachi knew it would end well.

But all I saw was trouble waiting to happen.

**TBC **

* * *

Last chapter's cliffhanger so owned this one's.

Ah well, I try.

I have big plans for that dinner. I don't think it will be next chapter; it might be chapter nine, even, but that's a good thing, because it means the story will be longer.

Well, at least Itachi didn't end up as OOC as everyone else. I do so like the way Kisame ended up, though that probably means he's OOC too.

Curse you flower.pot and your not-having-a-reply-button. You're reviews actually make me laugh a lot, and they're so long! I shake my fist at you.


	7. Discomfort

**Those Weird Feelings No One Ever Gets **

I was just reading FMA volume nine.

Lt. Havoc's pretty hot.

I can't believe who is girlfriend ended up being, though.

I had to pace around the house for a while after that one.

Jeez; and Al is still so cute! Ed too!

OK, I'll stop rambling and start chapter seven.

Not like there's a difference, really.

* * *

The rest of Friday passed.

Sasuke didn't call.

Saturday passed.

Sasuke didn't call.

Sunday passed.

Sasuke called.

The sun was setting, though it was hardly noticeable behind the dark clouds.

I had presumed that Sasuke wasn't going to regard me for the rest of our lives.

And I wouldn't have blamed him.

Now that I look back on it, I feel like an even bigger idiot than I had before.

If he hadn't called to explain things, and I wasn't so out of it, I would have certainly marched right over to his house, barged through the front door, and slapped him across the face.

Yeah, that sounds good.

But instead, I was sitting at my window, watching the stars appear in the gaps between the clouds as a middle-aged man I recognized from the second floor walk by, holding his daughter's hand, carrying an animal carrier with a large bow on it.

The phone rang.

I turned to look at it like it was talking to me.

It rang again.

I scratched the side of my face in consideration.

It rang again.

I sniffed uninterestedly.

_Hey, Naru . . . Sasuke . . . Eh, Itachi said to leave you alone but . . . he and Kisame went out to dinner, and . . . Well, uh . . . I'll . . . see you on Monday I guess . . . Loves. La-_

I listened.

He sounded scared.

It was hard to notice for most people, but to me, it sounded like he was crying.

My fingers trembled as I pressed the talk button.

"Sasuke."

A gasp.

"N-naruto . . . "

Silence.

I think he was just relieved I hadn't fled the country.

"Uh . . . hey," I said, hoping to break through the quiet.

"Hey . . . "

More silence.

It was unnerving.

I wished I were with him so I could see his face.

See what he was doing.

Any of his nervous habits?

Then what would I do?

Actions speak louder than words, so I presume it would be something like a hug, or a smile.

Unless he was sniggering and being a jerk.

No hugs for jerks.

Then we were both speaking at once, and all I could understand was the laughter afterward.

Once we'd stop there was more silence.

But it wasn't heavy or awkward.

I smiled.

I knew he could feel me smiling.

"Well, I better go before Itachi and Kisame get home . . . so, I'll see you on-- "

I had to say something.

Anything.

I don't know why it came out like it did.

"Why don't you come over?"

Dur.

Not good.

That was the last thing I wanted.

Or so I thought.

But it was all I had.

"Sure . . . Yeah, that sounds . . . cool."

At least it worked. Well, in the least, he wasn't saying no.

"Hey, bring your stuff, you can sleep over."

God.

I mean, damn, I'm such an idiot!

That was not what I meant to say!

I meant to say, 'Loves. Later.'

Doh . . . Man, this would not end at all smoothly.

"Hey, good idea . . . I'll be over in a second."

Phew.

"Loves. Later."

Despite my growing excitement, I was running around my flat like a lunatic.

Changing my shirt, brushing my teeth, changing into a shirt without a stain on it, shoving my diary back under my bed, choosing an even _better_ shirt.

I had one arm in the wrong sleeve when the doorbell rang, and I whipped off my shirt.

Smart.

I ripped the door open, half forgetting who would be there.

At least we were both blushing.

"Nice shirt," Sasuke commented, pointing to my bare chest.

His blush faded.

My blush grew.

I pursed my lips and clung to my shirt, holding it to my torso, "Shut up. I . . . I was . . . "

"Not wearing a shirt?" he supplied.

"Yes." I smacked a hand to my face. "No, wait, I was-- I was just in a rush!"

"Making things nice for me?" he smirked and swept past me, his bag slung over his shoulder. "You're such a sweetie."

"No . . . I . . . Gah . . . " I pushed the door closed angrily, running a hand through my hair. "Annoying as ever."

"But that's the way you like it, right?" he said, stopping so I would bump into him.

With a growl, I shoved him to the side, but a smile found its way to my lips.

Sasuke dropped his stuff in my room and came back out with a small box.

"Brought a movie," he tossed me the box and plopped down onto the couch, elbows supporting him on one arm rest and feet propped up on the other side of the couch.

"What is it?" I asked, popping the DVD out of the blank case.

"_The Departed_."

I set the DVD in the player and sat down on Sasuke, seeing as he refused to make room for me.

_The Departed_ it was.

I'm normally pretty good with horror films; you know, the stuff that will never ever happen in my lifetime or the lives after mine. But this was no horror film.

Oh, no. This was the real deal, the CIA, a modern Irish mafia.

I know that something like what was in that movie could never happen to me. Nonetheless, everything was unpredictable, everything freaked me out and gave me the chills.

Gah! There he was, Costello, there in the window! My window!

No . . . wait . . . it was Shishou . . . Just Shishou . . .

Damn you, Shishou.

I was seriously breaking down. That normally didn't happen with things like movies.

Or anything at all.

But now I had my legs hugged to my (still) bare chest, as I hadn't managed to find a moment at which I wasn't completely absorbed in the movie and mortified by it to pull my shirt back on, and I couldn't even pull my wide eyes from the screen.

"It's a nation of fucking rats," said Mr. French as they drove towards the scene of the . . . well, I assume you could call it a scheme.

With bated breath, I watched, on the edge of the couch, as they headed straight into the trap.

"Don't do it, don't do it, don't do it . . . " I squeaked, trying to keep my eyes covered.

But I couldn't help it. I had to watch. I had to find out.

"Ah, fuck it," Mr. French said just as his car and the building it had ran into was bursting into flame.

I flinched, and almost withdrew, but my hands were midway to my face when they stopped.

The gun . . . right to his head . . . and . . .

I found myself gripping Sasuke's arm like I was holding it on until the medics came to sew it back in place.

"I-is it over?"

Black eyes burned through me. I could feel them; I didn't have to look.

Sasuke kept quiet, like he was debating whether to say yes or no.

"No . . . That rat for Costello is about to kill him."

"Kill . . . wh-who?" I asked, though it was thoroughly muffled by Sasuke's back, as I had buried my face there.

"Costello."

"But . . . but weren't they on the same...?"

A gun shot. My arms flung around Sasuke's torso and I kept as close as possible.

Was that the movie or was it in my apartment building somewhere . . . ?

"You . . . " Sasuke started, and I almost thought he was about to stop there. "You can, uh . . . watch again."

My head pulled from the soft cotton of Sasuke's shirt and I looked at the screen.

That's when I felt it.

At first I thought it was Costello, come to kill me.

I turned, horror-struck, to look to my shoulder.

But that wasn't Costello's hand.

That was Sasuke's.

Gripping my shoulder.

But not for himself: for me.

My fingers twitched around Sasuke's arm, and I was ready to let go.

Ready to be a stereotypical man.

But they soon regained their strong grip, and I leaned against Sasuke, letting my hair drape over his shoulder and arm.

Screw manliness. I was fine being a wimp.

Not like I was interested in girls that only wanted manly-men anyway.

I ventured to take a peek at Sasuke's face.

Did he care? Too into the movie?

I mean, he _did_ have a boyfriend.

His eyes were forcibly locked on the TV.

Not the movie or the plot or the actors.

Just the TV set.

His mouth was set in a solid frown, trying to keep his concentration.

And his cheeks: Pink.

My hand that wasn't gripping his arm began to reach up to touch his cheek, but it stopped halfway and reminded itself of Neji.

Neji: Always in my way.

Before I knew it, the credits were sliding down the screen and Sasuke was standing up and stretching.

"Man, I love that mo-"

He looked down at his arm, where my hand was securely glued around it.

A fierce blush jumped onto my cheeks and I let go.

"Heh. Sorry," I said, my hand shriveling away and plastering itself to my other hand, keeping them neatly folded in my lap.

I found myself looking more and more stupid as I spent more and more time around Sasuke.

Sasuke looked about the room, until his eyes lay on the clock on the VCR. They screamed 'distraction'.

"Only eleven," he said smoothly, running his fingers through his black-silk bangs. "Wanna go crash the drive in? We could do the waitress thing again."

Picturing Sasuke in a skirt back then; it was a joke, something funny.

Now, imagining the orange and white plaited skirt just barely hiding a pare of pink panties as it swept over his creamy thighs, the skin-tight, white-cotton, button-up shirt beneath the two-sizes-too-small sweater vest, topped off by the orange paper hat . . .

The orange would probably look better on me but . . . wow.

"Uh . . . Naru . . . ?" I looked up. "Your nose . . . "

I held a hand to my nose with a furrowed brow, eyes locked on Sasuke's in confusion.

Then my eyes jetted to my hand as bright red dripped over my tan skin.

"Do movies really turn you on that much?" Sasuke snickered, bending down and snatching a tissue from the coffee table and sitting beside me. "Hold still."

Just reaching up to accept the tissue, my brain hadn't been prepared for Sasuke to hold the soft paper to my nose, setting the other hand beneath my chin and pushing back my head.

"They say this will make you drown in your own blood."

"What? Bastard, leggo!"

"Pfft, who would believe that though?"

With a quick twitch of irritation I relaxed, scowling none the less behind the blood-soaked tissue.

"There," said Sasuke, pulling the tissue away and reaching for another. "It's stopped."

An evil glint flashed in his colorless eyes and he smirked manically.

"Care to share with me what you were thinking of, ickle Naru-pie?"

I reddened further; afraid my nose would start bleeding again. "None of your business! You- you- !"

"Heh, wasn't that Gaara kid, was it?" he egged, walking his fingers up my arm.

The image of Gaara in the same outfit flashed by and I couldn't help but think thoughts that were illegal for me to view on the internet.

"No!" I said-- and it was the truth-- slapping his hand away, "It was nothing! God, can't a kid get a nosebleed without being called a pervert? Sheesh . . . "

"You do spend an awful lot of time around the librarian; that Jiraiya guy."

"I'll have you know, he's very intellectual, OK?" I shouted, right in his face.

Right in his face.

Too close.

Way too close.

Like, noses touching.

"So, did you want to go or not?" Sasuke asked, his smirk increasing in sarcasm, nearly completely filling the gap between us, the words escaping from his lips and whisking over mine.

"Ah . . . ah . . . " I stammered, my entire face red; I could feel the heat rising from my skin. "I, ah, I mean, the . . . uh . . . "

"One kiss means yes, two means no."

My face flashed through several expressions until settling on the basic embarrassed-shocked-and-slightly-grossed-out.

OK, it's not too basic, but very easy to pull off in a situation like that.

"Wha- ?" I burst out, jetting away and pressing myself against the couch, "I-I . . . Stop doing this!"

Rolling his eyes, Sasuke sat back, as he'd been leaning forward, and asked, "Just out of curiosity, do you still have those old things?"

If I could have gotten redder, I'm sure I would have.

"No! Th-that's stupid!"

"If you're lying . . . then there's no way I'll find them in your room anywhere, right?"

"No! Y-you can't look!"

"So they are there?" he sneered, standing up with a hand on his hip. "Maybe I should force you into one?"

"You know, I'm awfully tired."

"Or what about last years Halloween costume?"

No.

No way.

Not last years Sailormoon cosplay.

All Sasuke's idea, I swear!

I had recommended Bleach, but Sasuke insisted that I'd have to be Rukia because she wore the skirt.

But What the crap? He's the one with black hair.

Sometimes that guy is a worse pervert than Jiraiya and Kakashi combined.

"I don't have them!"

"Yes you do. I can see it in your eyes." He grinned. "You'd think I'd be able to tell when you're lying after spending half of my life with you."

"I don't have them!" I clenched my teeth.

Say something sarcastic: we're friends . . .

"Besides, why would I keep clothes in my eyes?"

Lame.

"Lame."

"Can't we just . . . "

Can't we just make out like you did with Neji?

Can't we go out and share a smoothie?

Can't we just take a walk to the beach, hold hands?

Can't we just call each other 'love' and be done with it?

"Can't we just, I dunno, go to the skating rink? I-I don't want to wear . . . " My voice faltered and disappeared, along with my confidence.

Sasuke stood from the couch, hands in his pockets. "Well, we don't have to _go_ anywhere . . . " he said as casual as it gets. "But . . . "

I rose an eyebrow. I didn't know it then, but I was in for big trouble...

"But what?" I asked cautiously.

"Hey, I forgot, I brought something else besides that movie," he said, the faintest hint of excitement in his voice. "Stay right here, I'll be right back."

Yes . . . Wait, was he ordering me around in my own house?

"Yeah, whatever." I lay back onto the couch. Whatever it was, I knew I wouldn't be able to dodge it . . .

Take it in style.

Several minutes passed. How much stuff did he bring? I mean, he doesn't have that big of a backpack.

The door to my room burst open. I sat erect at once; a flash of orange and black hit me before I was being stripped of everything I had on.

Yes. Everything.

"You bastard!" I screeched, trying my best to resist. Futile. "Get the-- ! What the fuck-- ? Bastard!"

At last, he got up and looked over his creation.

I fell off the couch and scrambled to my feet, back facing Sasuke, looking over the damage.

Sonic uniform. Great. Just great.

And to top it off: Blue, lacey panties, orange stockings, and lipstick.

"Bastard!" I shouted, turning around, my cheeks the same color as the 70's pink over my lips.

Looking at his nails like Mr. King of the Whole Wide World and Several Bags of Chips, Sasuke simply said, "Didn't you say that already?"

Anger boiled over inside me. "Why am only I wearing one?"

"Because you're cuter, obviously."

"But . . . !"

"I thought we could go down to the pier, play some games."

"Not in this! Unless you wear one!"

" . . . And then you pretend to be my girlfriend. See what the kids from our school say."

I was just about to retort. Ready to complain about only me, and why can't he be my girlfriend instead? Then it occurred to me.

"Well . . . I mean, what about Neji?"

He wasn't considering. He wasn't ignoring. He was suddenly stricken. Shocked by my words.

"What about him?"

I swallowed down anything holding me back.

We just had to talk about this. It hurt, and I'd rather wear a skirt to the pier with Sasuke holding my hand and grabbing my ass, but . . . it couldn't just be swept into a corner until Neji came around again.

I couldn't keep pushing him away when I only knew part of the story.

"I mean . . . he is your . . . your girl- I mean, boyfriend, right?"

It looked hard, but a small smile managed to stitch over his lips. "Yeah . . . I mean . . . " he struggled to keep his smile. "Yeah . . . "

I fiddled with the edge of the skirt, "Then . . . why do you . . . keep treating me . . . like . . . "

His smile melted away, and behind it was a genuine smile, his dark eyes shining with warmth. "I told you, I love you. Isn't this the benefit I get from that or something?"

"Love . . . But . . . what does that mean?"

Bye bye smile. Hello smirk.

"Anything. You tell me."

I crinkled my nose. I love Uchihas and all, but they are so much harder to understand than people like Kisame and Gaara.

Kisame was cool; no messing around, no trickery with him. Told you straight and that's that.

Gaara was . . . well, he's, er . . .

That skirt started sounding really nice on him . . .

Damn Sasuke and his pervy mind.

"Stop messing around!" I said, absently pulling on the skirt, hiding my legs, "I-I don't get it!"

"I'll tell you if you go to the pier with me," said Sasuke with an unpleasant glint in his eyes.

"No!"

Well, that didn't work.

"You said go to the pier, not to hold your hand!" I argued, yanking at my hand, though it showed no results.

We were strolling down the sidewalk, heading for the pier, the crowds getting larger as we neared the beach and the sound of crashing waves and laughing friends, families, and the screams of girls: mainly girls in my situation.

I always thought the girls who screamed about nothing with those annoying, high-pitched tones were annoying, but now I really sympathize.

"This is all part of the contract."

"What contract?" I ground out, squeezing Sasuke's wrist to keep him from tickling my thigh again.

"The one you signed, of course."

"Since when?"

"Since we left."

"Left where?"

"The place."

"You bast-"

"Nice girlfriend, Uchiha!"

We both looked behind us to find two kids from our P.E. class. Dear lord, why these people?

"She's hot!" said Chouji, standing next to Sasuke and leaning over to look at me. "Flat chest, but still!"

"I'm not deaf, you idiot!" I growled. "Don't talk like I'm not standing right here!"

"Feisty."

My head whipped to my left, where the second of the duo stood, looking me over.

"Looks don't matter anyway," said Shikamaru, looking away and becoming suddenly interested in a movie poster to his left.

"What about Temari? She's _really_ hot!" Chouji garbled through a mouth of kettle corn.

"Temari has personality."

"And I don't?" I shouted, right in his ear.

"Not as far as I'm concerned."

If the damn panties I was wearing weren't riding up, I would so have kicked his ass.

"Go away."

Shikamaru and Chouji looked up at Sasuke, one eyebrow raised each.

"You gonna keep her all to yourself?" Chouji whined. "She doesn't even go to our school!"

"You keep talking like that, and I'll be all- fucking- over you!" I screeched, grabbing him by the collar.

He grinned.

I swung at him, but Shikamaru grabbed my elbow before I made contact.

"Chill, babe."

I whipped my elbow from his grip.

"Don't you call me-- !"

Two bodies thudded to the ground and Sasuke wrapped his arm around my waist and pulled me to him.

"People aren't objects. Treat anyone like that again, and I will beat your skulls in."

They backed off, Shikamaru walking away, Chouji grinning stupidly at us.

"You mean your girlfriend will?"

"Hell yeah, she will," Sasuke hissed.

I stomped at him as he slowly disappeared into the crowd.

"And Temari smells!" I shouted after them.

With all honesty, I'd never taken the time to smell her, or any other girl, for that matter.

We stayed out pretty late. If I hadn't been wearing a skirt, things would have been really great, but I think you can guess what my problems were.

Anyway, it was all right. We went on a couple of rides, got some food, rode some more, almost threw up, played some games, the works. Laughed, shouted, smiled, laughed some more.

Everything was just as it should be. The world was spinning again as it had before.

"Think we should head back to your place," said Sasuke as the crowd thinned out and a pelican landed on the bench with us, eying my churro hungrily.

"Aw," I whined, breaking off a piece of the sugary-bread and holding it out to the bird. "Can't we at least stop at Borders first?"

The bread vanished along with the bird. "I don't know . . . "

"Please?" I begged, turning to Sasuke with wide eyes.

Something about those eyes, that look, that he's never able to resist.

"Fine. But not for too long."

"Yes!" I shouted, diving across the bench and suffocating him in a hug.

"Nice lace, sexy-thing," some guy said as he passed with his friends, looking at my nether-regions and winking.

Sasuke's half-empty cup of Mountain Dew hit him on the back of the head and soaked his hair and jacket.

"Don't you . . . hit on my girlfriend!" Sasuke snapped, standing from the bench.

For a moment, I was sure a fight was about to break out, and I tugged at Sasuke's arm. "Stop it, you bastard! You're gonna get yourself in trouble!"

But the guy's friends laughed and they kept on walking. Some friends they were.

With a puff of satisfaction, Sasuke grabbed my hand again and headed off the pier and towards the street of shops and restaurants, muttering, "If only they knew they were hitting on a guy."

We stopped in front of Borders.

"One book," he declared, holding up an index finger. "I'll buy you one book, and that's it. Then we leave."

"Okee day!" I said, pleased.

Pushing the door open, Sasuke stepped aside and let me by. "Alright, go get your book, I'll be up by the newest releases."

I nodded and let go of his hand, heading for the manga section, skidding to a stop in front of the shelves.

"OK, OK, not much time," I said, tapping my fingers together. "Um . . . _One Piece_? No, I have a lot of those. _Full Metal Alchemist_? No, no . . . _Card Captor Sakura_? Nah, Sasuke would never let me live it down."

My eyes scanned over the various bindings, title after title, artist after artist. "_Samurai Deeper Kyo_?"

I pulled the first volume of my new discovery from the shelf. "Samurai . . . demons . . . battles . . . Almost like _Inuyasha_. Sounds good."

I felt eyes and looked down the isle.

A boy, about ten or so, was holding some manga about ninjas with a yellow haired kid wearing an orange outfit on the front.

"Yes?" I inquired, turning, a hand on my hip.

"You're . . . those whiskers . . . Just like . . . Just like . . . him!" His eyes lit up and flashed a million different levels of ecstasy. "You-you even wear orange! Can . . . I have your autograph?"

I scowled.

"Scars. Stitches. God, they're _not_ whiskers, you brat!"

And with a quick flick of my tongue and a wrinkle of my nose, I turned away, my skirt twirling around my legs.

"Kid's crazy," I grumbled, hugging my selection to my chest. "Whiskers, whiskers, what the hell ever."

I strolled over to the new releases table, looking for the black hair.

It wasn't hard to find.

And neither was the long, black ponytail right beside it.

Or the pink lips upon fair skin as I got closer and closer.

That fucking little . . .

**TBC**

* * *

Flower.pot: I don't like being tormented! I need a reply button!

I really want to add Lee to this fanfiction . . .

I think the song _The One That I Want _from the movie _Grease _fits this fic nicely. Mmmhmm.


	8. Sleepover

**Those Weird Feelings No One Ever Gets**

Five-thirty AM, and I am about to pass out from editing and beta-ing all of these chapters.

* * *

As I neared, my senses clenched and tingled inside me, preparing to burst, but consulting one another first; was that really so smart?

Sasuke noticed.

I think he noticed far before that, like, the moment I'd pulled a book from the shelf, but just shifted emotions now.

Or at least the emotion on his face.

Hardly noticeable, but it was there.

He set a firm hand on Neji's shoulder and pulled him away from his face.

His lips moved but I could not hear nor understand from where I'd stopped, several tables away.

Neji seemed displeased, and ever determined, but Sasuke shook his head, his lips moving to the melody of his all-knowing, though not-caring, voice.

Then, with what could have been a sigh, Neji waved and turned, his ponytail brushing against Sasuke's cheek. He passed me without a glance and strode through the double doors, looking back at Sasuke one last time.

Gone.

I bustled over to Sasuke in a daze.

"What . . . What did you say?" I asked trying to hide the excitement from my voice as I got a bit closer than I realized, my book pressed against his chest.

He took the book, reading the back as he spoke. "I said I had more important things to do than to go to a movie."

My heart soared.

He didn't make it sound too significant, but it sounded like a million harps, blending smoothly with twenty violins and thirty cellos booming in the background.

A chorus of light shining in, giving Sasuke's face a new shade and angle as I looked at him in the orange glow of the corner street lamps.

I hadn't mentioned any of this to Sasuke.

Nor did I say a thing about the way his eyes reflected the night sky or the way I took in his figure, pasted against its background of houses and fences, not quite fitting in there, nor anywhere, unless I could see myself standing there with him, hand in hand, heart to heart.

It hurt to think I had missed it.

By just a day or so.

I was only twenty-some hours late to realize I wanted him, before someone came along and swept him up.

But, despite my obligation to admit that I wanted him-- loved him-- when I really started noticing, I wouldn't have been so reluctant to let the words slide from my tongue with so little struggle to find my way out of it.

Now I see that it's foolish to keep avoiding it: I'm madly in love with Sasuke and I would greatly like to claim him as my own boyfriend, in front of Neji and anyone else who would care to disagree.

But foolish is what I've been known to be, so there was no avoiding that: Besides, Sasuke . . . well, he liked Neji.

And it's just as childish not to admit that there was a possibility of Sasuke not just liking, but loving, Neji, but that one seemed to be in my favor.

Sasuke only loved three things: Itachi, tomatoes, and me (and not quite in that order).

To let in an outsider to such a short and stingy list with such ease?

Not likely.

He'd loved each of us for as long as he can remember, as he's told me, and to know someone two weeks and declare it was love; no, no, no.

I would never do that, and it was even less likely with Sasuke.

Because, what did Sasuke really love beyond his list of three?

Not even anything poetic, like the colors in autumn, the first snow in winter, the birds of spring, the radiance of summer.

He didn't even seem to notice seasons at all, and turned an indifferent shoulder to most of the beautiful things in life like that.

He's more of a what's-important-now? kind of guy.

The lock clicked in placed and I set my bag and keys on the kitchen table, standing behind Sasuke, whom stood in front of the open fridge, eying my vegetable drawer carefully, searching for any hint of red.

"So, hot stuff, where'd you stash my clothes?" I tried to sound sarcastic, like I was ready to laugh, but I was twice as ready to get out of the skirt and stockings and back into boxers and pants.

"Not telling," said Sasuke, sorting though my rotting celery and brown lettuce.

"Oh, yes you are," I said, placing my hands firmly on my hips.

"What if I don't know?"

"You do know and you will tell me. And if not, you will pay the consequences."

"I'll pass."

"Sasuke!"

"Where're your tomatoes?"

I rolled my eyes and looked over at the clock above my oven. 12:46.

"Whatever. I'm going to bed. Screw you."

"From behind or-- "

"Shut up!" I snapped, but I said it with a goofy grin nonetheless.

With a sigh, Sasuke stood from his crouching position in the light spilling from the fridge and shut the door. "Fine, fine, I'm not hungry anyway."

My goofy grin faded to a more pleased smile and I practically floated along behind him as we headed for my room.

We kicked off our shoes and socks and Sasuke stripped off his grey tee shirt and jeans, produced a pair of blue pajama bottoms and a matching shirt and pulled them on.

With a short yawn, Sasuke stretched and slipped under the covers.

"Well?"

"Well what?" I said, shuffling through my messy room.

"You going to sleep or not?"

I shook with anger.

My entire figure quaked and shuttered and I turned around like a malfunctioning robot.

"If I could find my pajamas . . . " I said through clenched teeth.

He stared at me for a second, keeping himself up with his elbows and fore arm against my comforter. "What, you think I hid them from you or something?"

"It wouldn't be unlike you."

He faked a pained expression and flopped onto his side, his back facing me. "Fine . . . whatever . . . I . . . " He sniffed loudly and obnoxiously. "I... never liked you anyway."

I rolled my eyes and continued looking.

I was almost sure that he'd hidden them, but they weren't in any of the obvious places.

At last, I found my giant _Orange Fanta_ shirt and pulled it on, though I couldn't find my bottoms anywhere.

So, as Sasuke lay there, possibly asleep, probably awake, I dropped the lingerie to my ankles and hopped into a pair of green boxers and snuggled into bed, my back facing Sasuke's.

I thought, in the least, he would notice the shift of the mattress, but I suppose he woke particularly early that morning or was just tired, because he was definitely not faking it.

At least he wasn't at first.

As I stared off into the complete darkness, searching the crevices of the night for answers and sleep, finding nothing but the Jack Sparrow poster on the opposite wall and the bright paint of my room, I heard the springs creek beside me as Sasuke rolled over in his sleep.

I shuddered as his hand brushed over the fabric covering my back, wishing deep-down that it was conscious.

But soon I could feel his smirk behind me and his hand run down my leg. "Nice pants."

I slapped his hand irately and scooted away. "Perv."

"You bet."

And for what seemed like an hour, it was as silent as the grave, just as night is better off as in a sleeping teenager's home for one.

Sasuke's breathing was steady like the wind through the grass and his hands remained-- quite pleasantly-- to himself.

Sitting up, I turned to look down at Sasuke.

It hurt.

To know that that peaceful face-- full of serenity; dreaming of things I knew he'd never stop to tell me unless I asked-- belonged to someone else.

To someone who could never begin to fathom what went on in that pretty little head of his; anything he would ever dream; think of dreaming; dream and not remember.

I knew, and I wanted to know more, but I was left on the side lines.

There was no one to blame really.

Neji liked Sasuke, Sasuke liked him back, and I just happened to realize that I liked Sasuke too.

I was late, but that wasn't even the fault.

The fault was that I didn't know: I didn't know what went on behind the scenes.

Why Neji?

Why Sasuke?

What happened?

What did he see?

How did this come about?

How long?

Was it my business?

But that's not even a fault I could change.

My mind buzzed with a million thoughts and questions and ideas and I couldn't sit still.

So, off to the kitchen I trudged, where my thoughts brought me to wash the dishes.

On the bright side, I wasn't doing something bizarre, like skydiving.

I wouldn't be the least surprised if I had thought of that at least once in the few seconds that it took me to make my way noiselessly out of my room and into the kitchen, though.

Just like every other room in my apartment, the kitchen was settled and soundless and so dark that it was practically just never ending blackness aside from very few silhouettes painted across the walls and tile on both the ground and counters.

My feet made the softest of padding sounds as I walked carefully across the kitchen and turned on the microwave light that shone down onto the range.

The flame-tinted light flooded over the stove and poured over the counter space, seemingly lighter as it wandered farther from its main source of energy, going no further once it reached the last few tiles before the carpeting, into the family room.

In the sink, the dishes were a mountain of dried ramen and soggy cereal.

Twisting the knob on the sink, I let the water get hot as I sat myself on the counter top, waiting.

The water was soothing.

But, as it ran and heated, I took a trip to the bathroom.

When I came back, the water was warm enough, though I can never understand why it's better to have hot water than cold for dish-washing.

Like I was programmed to do so, I picked up the Dawn soap and squeezed the blue gel-slime over my dishes and snatched up the sponge.

And that was that. Everything just came; I moved without thinking about my actions.

And on the inside, I was thinking about something else, because now, I had time.

_Isn't it obvious? Something happened between Sasuke and Neji after that kiss. How much have I missed? They're always spending time together. I guess I can't blame Sasuke; he must see something in that guy, something Neji only wants Sasuke to see. I suppose I _am_ being a little tough on the guy, assuming he knows nothing of Sasuke when I don't know a thing about him.  
_

I scrubbed at a particularly uncooperative spot on one of my plates. _But what's up with Sasuke and letting this guy treat me like crap? He doesn't even say anything, yet alone hit him, like others. What am I supposed to do, hit Neji _for_ Sasuke? I wouldn't mind, but what would Sasuke say? Tell me to back off his boyfriend? His boyfriend, who treats me like some kind of rotten servant. And he expects me to be nice to that guy, and then he's totally apathetic towards Gaara, who's trying hard enough to get along, for my sake._

The plate in my hand shimmered and I stared down at, tilting it, and my distorted reflection morphed to the point that I could see the solemn but desirable face staring up at me with black-ringed aqua-colored eyes. I smiled at it as my own yellow hair and tan skin replaced it.

Then I remembered . . .

_Gaara has that play this Wednesday. I wonder if Itachi will come so we can all just head back to Sasuke's for dinner. It'll be like dinner theatre. I dunno if he and Kisame are into that kind of stuff or not though. They like literature, reading, but I wonder if they like drama._

Before my hands had stopped working, every plate was cleaned, and my hands kept going until every dish was dried and stacked neatly back in the cabinets.

"Cool," I said to myself in a low voice.

I turned to the clock on the stove. 1:37.

Definitely time for bed. I _did_ have P.E. in about seven hours, meaning I'd have to wake up in five hours.

So back to bed I went. I snuck back into my room, shutting the door behind me and tip-toeing back to my bed.

It felt so nice to have to be quiet; to be careful not to wake up my guest, my temporary roommate. That what I did in my house mattered to people around me. Like living another night as a tiny, two person family.

The bed groaned as I slipped back under the blanket, to find Sasuke had taken up the entire bed.

Sleep on top of him, snuggle under him, or sleep on the floor.

My house. Floor was not an option. I refused to be forced out of my own bed.

On top of him. He was always very grumpy if he was woken up. The worst time had been when he punched his own window and caused it to crack terribly.

Underneath. Well, still a chance he would wake up, but it was far safer. With all hope, the snuggling would be enough to get his mind off of being woken up, and he wouldn't destroy my room.

I took a breath to gather my self confidence, and dove under the blankets.

There was a tiny bit of room on the edge, but just about enough to fit half of my body, being squished against Sasuke.

With the most delicate bit of force, I snuggled up to him to get him to scoot.

Worked pretty well.

Now I fit on the bed, but I wouldn't be sleeping comfortably.

More snuggling.

I'm sure I would have been ten times as red in the face if Sasuke was awake.

Grumbling drunkenly, Sasuke rolled over, now facing me.

I swallowed down my nerves.

An arm slung over me, and with a deep, easy yawn, Sasuke pulled and I was hugged to his chest, my face flat against his collarbone, my lips tingling from the sensation of the collar of his shirt and the extravagant texture of his flawless skin, toying with my senses.

Amazing. If Neji didn't really see anything in Sasuke except for his excellent beauty, I couldn't blame him.

He wasn't just an average type of cute, not even Prince Charming cute.

People didn't turn and say, "Oh, he's cute," and forget all about it.

He was carved deep into your memory; you would always see him.

I know, years from now, grown women will walk around, remembering Sasuke's face, still fantasizing about him being like the perfect man; respecting all women, kissing hands, bowing, that crap.

You could fall in love with him just by passing him, without even clearly seeing his face, and that would be that.

You could date a million more men, but Sasuke would always be that guy sticking out like a daisy in a field of dandelion weeds; so much more lovely, but never smelling quite as sweet.

And all that time I'd known him for so long, and still, I never fell for him.

I suppose it was gradual.

Day after day I fell deeper; like a centimeter each time, and now, after nine years; nine years of spending time with him, three in which the hormones kicked in and I realized I _could_ possibly fall for someone, and in which I began my long, individual thinkings of, "What's wrong with the color of his skin? What's wrong with his religion? What's wrong with their sexuality? You don't like it, leave them alone. All fine and dandy with me. I think being different is fun; more variety," and that was probably where that kid came from.

Secretly growing and adapting and liking what he saw.

Until he was big enough, in which he looked out his little windows, wanting a glimpse of his true love, to find he was kissing another boy, or girl, whatever, and then ran off after him, when his host ran the other way.

So much that kid had built up.

And now it was leaking out, like a seal had broken, and right now, things were going crazy.

"Mmmm."

It came from Sasuke's throat like the purr of a cat, and my thoughts ran wild wondering what he was thinking.

"Nnn . . . mmmnnnn . . . "

The delicious sounds of lust.

Though he could be having a dream about having a whole acre of tomato vines, and he was sitting down to eat one now.

Never know.

Lust sounded so much more like Sasuke.

After more irresistible insight to Sasuke's dream and finally managing to turn around so I had my back pressed against Sasuke, finally able to breath, I fell asleep, Sasuke's breathing like a lullaby, his arms like the blanket of protection that I hadn't had in so long . . .

All the kids were gone and the sun was setting.

Good riddance.

They always made fun of me because I still liked playing in the sand box.

But fine.

I grew up liking it and I would go on liking it, no matter if they tried to stop me or not.

My dad always liked it and played with me; why not keep on?

If he was so great and stuck his feet in the sand up until his death, why not me as well?

A shadow cast over.

Not of a tree or slide.

I turned around and faced a pair of kaki shorts.

"What . . . what do you want?" I growled, my lip trembling as I looked up at a pale face framed by black bangs.

"I heard about your dad," said the kid, staring solidly at his sneakers. "My family died too. Last year."

"I know," I grumbled, turning away to fiddle with my sand bucket.

I heard the kid shuffling, and he said, "My brother wanted to . . . he wanted to help you . . . "

"I don't need help..."

Silence. I felt like a jerk, but I wanted to be left alone.

"Please let us help. We lost out mom and dad too . . . we . . . want to help."

Shouting. I wanted to shout at him, ask him what he would know about me; he didn't understand.

But he did. He understood well.

Just like he said, he wanted to help.

With teary eyes, I turned around, an angry expression etched over my features.

The kid looked distant, sad. It took him a minute to register I'd turned around.

"What . . . are you going to do if I come?"

"My older brother . . . said he has a plan."

A smile found its way to my heart and faded over my lips.

"O . . . K."

He held out his hand.

I reached up.

A kid came frolicking by, between our hands, then grabbed Sasuke's arm, and ran off.

I was alone.

My chance had been taken.

Darkness.

I could feel it.

And a distant buzzing sound.

I swatted at a bee.

The sound didn't stop.

Shaking.

This was awful.

Was this the end?

I felt like I had been sucked into a black hole.

"Naruto," someone said, and my eyes peeled open.

The room was grey, slowly becoming brighter.

"You awake?" came another grumble behind me.

I slammed my alarm off and relaxed back against Sasuke's figure.

My blurred vision slowly focused and I read the time aloud.

"Five-forty."

"Your alarm goes off this early but you're still late so often?"

"I set it so I'm ready when you get here."

"What would you do without me?"

"A lot of detention is what I'd do."

I recalled my dream as Sasuke relaxed back onto the covers and sighed easily.

"I had a dream about the day we became friends."

"Guess that means you won't be telling me scene by scene what it's about."

"But there was this part."

I stopped.

Should I tell him?

Tell him about how the younger version of Neji my mind had formed had come by and snatched Sasuke from my life?

How foolish would that be?

"And . . . ?"

"Kisame was there."

"Such brilliance your mind produces."

"Tell me about it."

"We should check your IQ. Maybe it'll be high enough that they'll want to pay you big bucks: we can get a brain transplant, and trade out your brain for mucho moola and a used brain."

"Good plan. Let's start with trying to find and IQ test."

"An IQ test you will be able to pass."

"Or you could give me all the answers."

"Didn't we just agree that you had the more brilliant mind?"

"Ye-- Hey, stop putting your feet on my legs, they're cold!"

"That's it."

"What's it?"

"It's the legs."

"Do I wanna know?"

"Nope."

With a heave and a groan, I pulled myself to a sitting position and pulled my knees to my chest.

Sasuke's arms did not move. He remained firmly clinging around my waist.

"Sasuke . . . "

"Hm?"

"Let go."

"Nah, I'm fine this way."

"So?"

He snuggled against my shirt and sighed wistfully. "You don't care that I, your best friend, am in a comfortable position as it is?"

"I guess I don't," I said, looking down at the top of his head. "Besides, we have to eat breakfast."

Persistent. He wasn't about to let go.

"We should go out to eat."

I rose an eyebrow at his hair. "Like where?"

"Like that nice place down in Huntington Beach . . . or that café in Pasadena . . . "

"That's, like, a half hour away."

"By car."

"You think we'd go faster on blades?" I said with disbelief.

"No. But I have plenty of money for bus fare."

"Alright, enough messing around, we can go out for breakfast, but in this area, like, down the block or something."

"Fine." His hands slipped away and he stood up, pulled his slippers from his bag, fit them on, drew my pajama bottoms from his bag, tossed them at me and said, "Get those on and a pair of slippers, and let's go."

I hopped into my pants, but stared incredulously at him. "Shouldn't we get dressed?"

"Are these not clothes?"

A smile sneaked onto my lips and I stepped into my slippers and followed him out of my room-- his skateboard under his arm-- and we left the building, Mr. Old Dude shouting after us about skateboards in the lobby.

Not like we were using it.

"Let's get going," said Sasuke once we were out the double doors.

My smile flickered and disappeared. " I left my blades in the-- "

"I know; that was the point."

I furrowed my brow.

One foot on his board and one on the cement, Sasuke grabbed my arm and pulled me aboard, wrapping my arm around his chest.

Instinctively, my other arm followed, and we were off.

"So, where are we going?" I asked as the wind whistled in my ears and combed through my hair.

He said nothing. At first I thought he hadn't heard, but the silence wasn't absence; it had a, "You'll see," air to it.

Fine.

As long as I got food.

That's what mattered.

And that we didn't get in an accident.

But it's wasn't likely.

"Hey watch it!" some pink-haired girl shouted as Sasuke zipped past her.

"Shut up!" said the blonde girl walking with her, her voice fading as we sped down the sidewalk, away from them. "That was Sasuke you were shouting at!"

A stupid grin made its way to my face.

I felt so privileged when I did stuff with Sasuke.

People stood out of his way, it was OK for him to be a jerk.

Which is what made the others stupid and him cool, but still.

It was like riding with a prince.

"Hold on tight."

"What? What for?"

"Just do it."

I hesitated. Was he just being a pervert or something?

I obliged anyway.

I suppose he felt my squeeze, and took it as a green light.

"Here we go."

"Wait, wh-- ?"

My feet parted with the board and we soared over a mail box and a fire hydrant.

Back to the board they went, my embrace around Sasuke having increased ten fold.

"Wh . . . Sas . . . Tell me when you're going to do stupid stuff like that!" I shouted into Sasuke's back, my fingers gripping desperately at Sasuke's shirt.

"If I told you, you wouldn't have let me do it."

"Well, then, don't do it in the first place, you bastard!"

Silence. I knew he wanted to smirk or something, but I don't think he was.

Why he didn't was beyond me.

The apartment buildings and homes thinned out and the buildings became restaurants and shops. We passed the skate shop, the used-book shop, the thrift shop, the place we got our shoes from, the deli, the doughnut place.

All very average places.

Sasuke had just managed a jump over some kid that was bending down to get a nickel off the side walk when we finally stopped.

"Here."

I looked up.

The large sign just above the door and just under the roofing read, _Egg Heaven_.

"Kisame says this place is good," said Sasuke, stepping off his board and flipping it into his hand. "I-- "

He looked down at me.

"Did you want breakfast, or are you just going to hang out there all day?"

"You . . . scared the crap outta me!" I cried, slowly letting go, my arms shaking.

I knew how to skateboard, but ever since the fifth grade, when I tried to do a jump and fell off, resulting in seven stitches across my forehead, I knew skateboarding wasn't my thing.

I never told Sasuke I was afraid to do a jump on a skateboard, and I never gave him hints.

It wasn't his fault. It was mine.

Rolling his eyes, Sasuke grabbed my wrist and, his board under his arm, strolled into the restaurant with me stumbling along behind him.

"Two and a half," said Sasuke to the waitress when she came to seat us.

It would be that, on any other occasion, the waitress would look at Sasuke like he was crazy, tell him that there were no skate boards allowed, and go tell her manager.

The advantage of the enchanting black eyes and milky white skin lands it again.

"Yes sir! A table for the lovely couple!" said the waitress with a big smile and stars in her eyes.

Couple? I looked at Sasuke's hand, fingers wrapped magically around my wrist.

Couple.

I could see where she was coming from.

Was she like those girls online?

Those gay-boy fangirls?

Who made pairings in shounen manga, when there were no girls at all; was that what she was?

Getting excited by two boys together?

"A table by the window," she said happily. "Would the miss prefer something else?"

I said nothing.

I hardly knew she was talking about me.

"He's a boy," said Sasuke.

So bored, it sounded like he yawned it.

"O-oh!" the girl stuttered, blushing dangerously. "Oh, my, I'm so sorry! I didn't mean it like that!"

I blinked and looked down at myself as the girl hurried off to get us menus.

I guess I kind of looked feminine; more so than Sasuke.

But my disposition was still broody when I sat down across from Sasuke and next to his skate board.

"Stop smirking like that," I growled at Sasuke. "I don't really look like a girl; she just . . . must not like same sex couples, so . . . she just presumed, because I'm . . . less manly looking than most guys . . . in the face . . . that . . . "

"OK, OK," said Sasuke, waving me off. " I get it; you're girly, but not that girly."

The waitress rounded the corner and our conversation came to a halt.

"Here are your . . . your menus." She stumbled over her words like a love struck five year old. We took the menus, and she added, "I'm . . . I'm really sorry about that, sir. I . . . I didn't mean it like that . . . I mean . . . I wasn't trying to be rude . . . it-it wasn't an insul-"

"Yes, thank you, now if we can get to our menus," said Sasuke, snapping his menu open, glaring into it angrily.

The girl nodded several times and took her post back at the door once more, glancing nervously back at Sasuke every few seconds.

I smiled and waved at her before turning to my menu.

Miss: me? Jeez.

"What are you getting?" Sasuke asked from behind the large menu.

I scanned over the lists of food, the names, the prices, the contents of each dish.

"I think . . . I'll get some chocolate-chip waffles . . . and . . . some sausages."

He set down his menu, nodding like he understood where I was coming from.

Wait for it . . .

Nope.

Jut as I expected; he did not tell me what he was getting.

No big deal. He didn't tell me a lot of stuff, and it wasn't because he didn't want me knowing, he just didn't.

It was him, and I couldn't change that.

I just wish he could figure when I want to know something so I don't make an idiot of myself by asking.

Like . . . about his love life.

"Are you two ready to order?" said another waitress.

She was a little older than the last, so falling for Sasuke didn't seem possible, and if she had, she was well put together.

Sasuke nodded, waving a hand at me to go.

"I'll have a glass of apple juice, no ice, an order of chocolate-chip waffles, and a side order of sausages."

"Did you want hash browns, home fries, potato-"

"Hash browns."

"And for you?" said Hello, My Name Is Shuri, turning to Sasuke,

With a sniff of thought, Sasuke said, "I'll have the bell pepper omelet, and can you put tomato in that?"

"Sure, we can do that for you."

"Cool . . . and I'll have a glass of orange juice with that."

"OK; did you want hashb-"

"Home fries."

"And did you want sa-"

"Bacon."

"Alrighty. Your plates will be out in a bit. Just call if you need anything; my name is-"

"Shuri."

The waitress smiled painfully at Sasuke as she collected our menus. "Uh, yes..."

With a nod from Sasuke and one from the waitress, she left us, and Sasuke propped his feet up on the table.

"You're such a jerk," I sighed as if I was discussing the weather.

"Yeah."

And speaking of the weather, "You think it's going to rain?"

Sasuke stared at the sky; his face looked more like he was simply thinking deeply.

"It could. The clouds still haven't let up all the time they've been here, but today might be the day."

"Then shouldn't we be wearing, y'know, more weather worthy clothes?"

He shrugged and let one of his slippers slip off and tumble onto my lap. "It would help, but this is all I brought."

"Smart move."

"Well, I'm sure it'll be fine, even if we get soaked to the bone."

"You call that fine?"

Sasuke ignored the glasses set in front of us. "A little water never hurt anyone; that's why they invented the shower, because it wouldn't hurt anyone."

"What about that movie? _Psycho_."

"The guy killed her, not the shower."

"It was still creepy and still in the shower."

"You're just paranoid."

This went on for a while.

Random debate-like-conversation about _Psycho_ and movies and my fear of suspense and not horror and Sasuke's dislike of any book or movie with a happy ending.

"I dunno, I just don't like them. Too unreal."

"But . . . don't you like seeing everyone end up happy?"

"I don't really care; it's all fiction."

As we spoke, Shuri bustled over, carrying a large tray with two plates on it. "Careful now, the plates are hot."

I quickly grabbed Sasuke's slipper out of the way, and she set my plate in front of me.

Sasuke did not move his feet.

Good lord.

"Um . . . sir. . . I have your meal . . . "

Sasuke nodded. "Yes, I see that."

"Would you . . . I mean, did you want your meal in front of you, or . . . um . . . "

"I would like it on this table."

The woman didn't seem to comprehend, but set his plate down in front of the chair where Sasuke's skateboard sat.

"Enjoy your meals," said Shuri with a grimaced smile.

"Thank you," I tried with an embarrassed smile.

She nodded and headed back to the kitchen once more.

I shoved Sasuke's feet off the table and chucked his slipper at his head. "Bastard."

"Yeah."

He grabbed his slipper from under the table and pulled it onto his foot.

And so came the lecture.

I won't make you experience the torture, since it's so boring.

I was the one giving it, and even I was bored by it.

Sasuke pushed his plate away, dabbing his napkin at his lips. "Nothing beats a nice long lecture about how to act in public over breakfast. So says the king of no manners."

I looked down at my shirt, where I spilt most of my hash browns, brushing them off quickly and wiping about a half cup of catsup from my face.

"Shut up," I grumbled, standing from my seat. Sasuke stood as well.

And then . . . something strange happened.

"Let's go," said Sasuke . . . picking me up.

Yes, he picked me up.

Wrapped his arm around my middle, hitched me up, and slung me over his shoulder.

At first I was too stunned to say a thing, and Sasuke was half way through paying for our meal when I began to shout.

"Sasuke! You bastard! Put me down!" I wiggled irritably, trying to break free.

"So, even though he's a boy, you two are a couple?" the girl at the register asked.

"No," said Sasuke, folding his bills up and slipping them in his pocket.

"Really? Oh! Then . . . I was wondering, if . . . if you could stop by around two? That's when my shift ends . . . "

"I have a boyfriend," said Sasuke, turning away and walking towards the door.

I lifted my head to look at the girl as we left.

She seemed hurt.

I couldn't blame her.

It was like a condensed version of what was happening to me . . . but . . .

Sasuke would never walk away from me for good, right?

It was the only thing on my mind as we rolled along the streets, people turning, girls giggling and pointing; a couple of people even whistled.

But it didn't quite kick in until I heard a whole crowd laughing, and as Sasuke got off his board and walked through the crowd, I realized what was going on.

And the first thing I wondered was "Is Gaara seeing this?"

Indeed, he was.

**TBC**

* * *

This chapter is boring.


	9. And Here Comes Another

**Those Weird Feelings No One Ever Gets**

Sorry for the late update, I've been... busy... um... busy slacking... that is... And fangirling over Suigetsu. I'm good at that.

Well, this chapter will not be the drama-free fluff we saw last time. Gomen. It must be done.

But hey, two new characters are introduced. Fun...

Oh, I dunno if I'll have Kisame and Itachi in this chapter, but if I do... Wow, I'm trying so hard not to make them into a pairing. This isn't a KisaIta fanfic, but I really like that pairing...

Ah well, at least they're here. For the people that don't like that pairing, you can pretend they're just friends, and to the KisaIta supporters, you can pretend they're dating. I like the latter...

Well, here goes nothing and some Winterfresh that I was chewing yesterday... Ew...

-----

He saw my butt first... Way to start things off.

Sasuke trotted up the stairs to the door. My face was splattered red and I had my eyes closed tight.

We were walking down the hall when I heard him.

"Sasuke." Gaara's voice.

Oh crap! Crap! Serious crap!

Why? I don't know... I guess I didn't want him, of all people, to catch me being carried...

Or... just carried by Sasuke...

"Gaara," said Sasuke, walking past.

For a second, I wanted to call out. 'Hey Gaara! What's up?' But my nerves kicked in, and I covered my face with my hands.

If I can't see him, he can't see me...

"And Naruto," said Gaara, a little more animated than when he spoke to Sasuke.

I parted my fingers and peeked through. The smallest of smiles adorned his lips and he had two plastic bags of newspapers in his hands.

"H... Hey, Gaara!" I called, waving as I bounced on Sasuke's shoulder, still heading down the hall.

Shifting his bags, he waved as well, "See you at lunch."

I smiled, and we turned a corner.

"Dammit, Sasuke..."

"What?"

"Don't you 'what' me. You know I wanted to talk with Gaara."

"So you did... Well, well, learn a new thing everyday."

"Shut up."

And he did.

"Sasuke?"

No reply.

"Sasuke!"

Nada.

Sasuke turned into a classroom; Mr. Hatake's, obviously. Mr. Hatake was at his desk, reading the book that he always kept a book cover on to keep kids from knowing what the book was about.

Of course, we knew. It was a novel that our librarian had published years before, when he was an author and not a school librarian. Rated eighteen and up. For Sexual content.

He wouldn't let us read it...

"Yo," said Mr. Hatake, eyes not moving from his book, "Now that you two are here, I can leave..."

And he stood. Just about out the door.

"Going to go visit your boyfriend?" Sasuke blurted.

Kakashi's hand froze on the doorknob. "Who would that be?"

"... Mr. Umuino..."

"The vice principal?"(5) Kakashi asked calmly, and without waiting for an answer, continued, "What would make you ask that?"

"No reason."

"Because you make a cute couple!"

Sasuke turned to look to see who had spoken, and I had only just got a glimpse of our principal coming through the door before I was facing the opposite wall.

"Ah, Tsunade, good morning," said Kakashi happily.

"Good morning, Kakashi, and..."

"Uchiha Sasuke," said Sasuke nonchalantly.

"And..."

"Lemme down, Sasuke!" I cried, flailing my arms and kicking my legs.

"Sasuke and Lemme Down. Very well."

"Uzumaki Naruto!" I corrected hastily.

"Naruto and Sasuke. Glad to meet you... or... your backend. Any way, Kakashi, Iruka asked me to stop by your classroom on my way to the art room. He said he'd like to talk to you."

"Who's Iruka?" I whispered to Sasuke.

"So he _is_ your boyfriend?" Sasuke asked as he shifted me on his shoulder, also answering my question. I groaned angrily.

"Um..."

"Well!" said Tsunade, and I wished I could see what was going on, "Good luck, Kakashi!" The next bit was in a lower tone, but I could still hear it. "I want every juicy detail later..."

I heard high heels clacking away, becoming fainter and fainter. "Well, see you eighth period," said Kakashi, and he shut the door quickly.

"... That was different," said Sasuke.

"Let me down."

"You think they're seriously dating?"

"Let me down."

"Though Tsunade was right about them making a cute couple..."

"Let me down."

"You're no fun."

But still, he did not let me down.

And for almost an hour, until the bell rang, I was slung over Sasuke's shoulder as he read something called fanfiction.

"'Kiss me,' he said, grabbing his shirt collar. 'You want to, I can see it in your eyes.' Kotetsu looked away. 'I... I mean... I don't... Please, Izumo, let me-'"

The bell rang and Sasuke tapped the mouse, closing the screens, and shuffled out of the computer lab...

With me still over his shoulder.

"So, basically, people write stories using characters from other stories?" I asked, now used to being over Sasuke's shoulder

"Yeah," said Sasuke, "Like that one was from some manga called Naruto."

"I saw that one... at Borders. Not close; some kid had it."

"It's a pretty weird one, I hear."

"Why's that?"

"I dunno; but I think it's weird since all the names are similar to people at this school. Main character's name in Naruto, he's on a ninja team with a guy named Kakashi and Sasuke and some other girl. The main plot is of the kid Sasuke running away to get power to kill his older brother, Itachi, and Naruto tries to get him back, I guess."

"That's creepy..."

"We should read it..."

"I'll pass thanks."

"Oh, no, we should find out the other characters and pair them all up..."

"You're sick."

"Yup."

"I wonder what other characters are in there?"

"I was reading spoilers on wiki-pedia."

"And...?"

"The team they're on consists of four people; Sasuke, Naruto, Sakura, and Kakashi. Other teams have some kids named Kiba, Ino, Shikamaru, Chouji, Hinata, Shino, Tenten, Lee, Neji, Temari, Kankuro, Gaara-"

"Woah baby!" I cried, and the people that had been staring at us gave me strange looks, "I've heard of almost all those people!"

"Even the girls?"

"Yeah, Ino and Sakura; haven't you seen them? Big _you_ fans, pink and blonde hair, really popular."

I felt Sasuke shrug underneath me and we turned into the locker room. "I could care less."

With a sigh, I relaxed, limp and heavy on Sasuke but I said nothing. I, too, could care less, but I wish Sasuke would acknowledge when I might care, and care that I care...

Which sounds strange when you say it fast...

"Hey, Uchiha, nice doll, you carry that everywhere you go?" called some kid holding his PE shirt in his hand. His hair was black and similar to Mr. Hatake's... I think his name was Abumi or something...

Sasuke turned around, and I stared down at the ground and the back of Sasuke's legs. Anything to keep from looking at all those kids.

I could feel the anger and malice smoking from Sasuke's eyes and I almost felt like him holding me would bring me to roast. I was almost glad didn't have to see Sasuke staring at this guy. Anyone watching, even from a position like mine, knew very well Sasuke didn't have to say a thing to set this guy straight. Of course, that didn't keep him from doing so.

"Insult him again and I'll be sure you never use your that mouth of yours ever again."

The room seemed to shake as the kid swallowed nervously. And Sasuke whipped away and strode back down the isles to our lockers. When I looked, the kid was shaking and staring at me like I was work of the devil.

Such kindness. But hey, whatever works, right?

I think the fright of it had spread; spread like a disease might. Half the school population avoided even glancing the tips of Sasuke's polished nails, and if they found themselves looking, they quickly averted their gaze down at the rather cute kitty faces on Sasuke's feet.

At least people stopped making fun.

Not only had the fear spread, but the gossip; the novelty of a student carrying around his best friend, and not putting him down in any class. But the way Sasuke went about it kept all the teachers from punishing him. Quite amazing.

Lunch came and the school as a whole squeezed into the cafeteria and several kids took a different turn and went outside. Which is where Sasuke went.

With a grunt of discomfort, Sasuke took a seat at our regular table. He gripped me securely around the middle, and I foolishly believed I was free at last, when he repositioned me to his shoulders, where I sat, piggyback style.

"Oh..." I groaned burying my face in his hair, "God, Sasuke, when will you let me down?"

"Maybe by the time I go to bed... maybe..."

"Or, just as an experiment, how about right now?"

"How boring..." said Sasuke, fiddling with the fluff on my slipper.

There were several scuffling sounds and I peaked out from behind Sasuke's head.

"Ah, Gaara!" I said as the boy took his seat across from Sasuke.

He nodded, smiling the most unnoticeable smile.

"Well, now that you're here to save our table, I have to go buy us lunch."

I blinked, and finally registered as we were headed towards the cafeteria, and waved back at Gaara.

Then I realized.

"Wait... you don't have any money!"

"Nope."

"Then... Sasuke, how did you buy breakfast?"

"I swooned her."

I growled; "You bastard, that's stealing!"

"Not if she gives it to me of her own free will. Just like this girl will do." We stopped at a table near the doors to the cafeteria, and Sasuke crossed his arms coolly, looking down and the two girls I had mentioned to him earlier; Ino and Sakura.

The girls stared up, completely awed. "S...Sasuke..." the girl with the pink hair stuttered.

"Yo..."

The girl with blonde hair rubbed her eyes and looked again. "What... I mean... H-hi!"

Sasuke turned his head away, too cool to look at this scum apparently. "I have a dilemma."

Those girls jumped all over it. Nearly every girl near by, in about a twenty-foot radius, were on their feet as well, leaning close to Sasuke but never touching him. It was a muck of sound, and I wrapped my arms securely around Sasuke's neck to make sure I didn't get separated.

_What is this shampoo?_ I thought as the deafening squeals and hum of giggles prodded at my brain, _Like watermelon-kiwi... smells good… _I buried my nose deep in Sasuke's black locks and took deep breaths, blocking out the world. Just Sasuke and me... alone... it had been so long...

"Oh, Sasuke, please tell us, we'll help any way we can!" I heard for the millionth time.

At last, Sasuke sighed, and the girls held their breath as his lips parted to speak. "My cute friend here has failed to bring money for lunch, as have I, as we don't have any pockets."

The girls took a moment to look up at Sasuke's 'cute friend' and clap their hands and giggle in delight, before raining Sasuke in dollar bills.

"Spend my money!"

"No, no, spend mine, I have five dollars!"

"I have a twenty!"

"You can have my college savings if you'd like, Sasuke!"

"I'll sell my car; you can have that! Please, please!"

Counting several dollar bills in his hand, Sasuke nodded to himself and turned away, leaving the girls struck dumb in a heap of dollars, spread over the ground like autumn leaves.

"... Whoa..." I said with wide eyes, "Is that... how much food... We're going to get fat!"

"We?"

"... What is that supposed to mean?" I growled, leaning over Sasuke's head.

Sasuke flipped through his stack of bills, "What contribution did _you_ make, moron?"

"... You're going to let me go hungry?" I shouted, gripping Sasuke's hair, "Bastard!"

"Watch the hair, man."

I growled, but said nothing. We were in the cafeteria in no time, every person stepping aside, making a walk way for Prince Sasuke, ruler of all that is nail polish and emo. Even the entire lunch line stepped aside and let Sasuke to the front.

"What do you want to eat?" Sasuke asked, placing a slice of pizza on his tray.

"Ramen!"

"You need variety in your life."

"But... I like ramen..."

"Fine," and with a mocking fangirl-ness, he said, eyes wide, "Anything for you, Naruto."

"Shut up."

And he did... again. God damn him.

Seeing as he had shut up, I ordered our lunch for him, the lunch lady distraught over why I was talking while on Sasuke's shoulders and Sasuke paid, not a word spoken.

You could say he's an idiot, but silly sounds cuter.

Damn you, kid... down there... I... shouldn't like Sasuke... Sasuke... he's... dating Neji...

"I said," Sasuke's voice rang in through my thoughts, "Do you want miso or barbeque pork ramen?"

Blinking, I managed something that began with an 'm', and Sasuke nodded under my chin, handing several bills to the guy behind the snack stand, who couldn't seem to stop staring at me.

"Queer," Sasuke stated simply as we headed back to the lunch table.

"Who?"

"That kid, did you see the way he was-"

"Was what?" I asked as Sasuke's tray clattered onto our table. No reply. "Sasuke! Was what? You've made me curious! C'mon!"

Still nothing. God, idiot... I looked up to give Gaara a questioning look when I saw he was talking intimately with two boys our age.

"I really don't like the song..." Gaara drawled, running his fork through the puddles of salad dressing in his plastic bowl, "Disturbing."

"Immature," added the boy to Gaara's left. He was wearing small, round sunglasses and a scarf hiding his mouth, but I knew right away it was Aburame Shino.

"Come on!" said the last kid; Inuzuka Kiba from my Language Arts class, "You must admit, it's funny!"

I parted Sasuke's hair to get a better view. "What's funny?"

"It's the-" Kiba began.

"Nothing, Uzumaki," Shino said, covering Kiba's mouth, "Nothing; it's not important-"

"-the Enormous Penis song!" Kiba finished.

I know for a fact that I was blushing only god knows mayhem, and I could sense that Gaara and Sasuke were embarrassed as well. Shino... he's just weird and... normal-ish.

"How... wh... what are the lyrics?" I stuttered. Curiosity is not one of those things I can contain very well.

"You don't want to-"

"Well, if you must know!" Kiba interrupted Shino, "It goes..."

"Kiba..." Shino snarled, gripping his shirt sleeve, "Don't you dare..."

"Whenever life gets you down! Keeps you wearing a frown!" Kiba sang; not so loud so the whole yard could hear, but definitely tables neighboring.

"Inuzuka, what kind of idiot...?" Gaara mumbled, covering his eyes in a way one might if they're friend was stripping n front of a large crowd.

"And the gravy train has left you behind! And when you're all out of hope, down at the end of your rope-"

"Kiba, I'm serious..."

"And nobody's there to throw you a line! If you ever get so low that you don't know which way to go, come and take a walk in my shoes."

Several tables of kids were now turned to watch as Kiba sang. Party because, and this is just an assumption, no one ever sings in the middle of lunch on completely average days, and partly because Kiba is part of choir.

"Never worry 'bout a thing, got the world on a string, cause I've got the cure for all of my blues!"

"Kiba... No, not another word!" Shino growled, squeezing his arm. But he only sang louder, and now the entire yard was looking, and several kids from inside the cafeteria had come out to hear as well.

"I take a look at-"

"Kiba!" Shino shouted desperately.

"Inuzuka!" Gaara snapped, slamming his fists on the table.

"-my enormous penis, and my troubles start a meltin' away! I take at my enormous penis, and the good times are here to stay!"

I felt a surge of satisfaction flow over me. At least my anticipation wasn't for nothing; that was certainly worth hearing...

"Got to sing and dance when I glance in my pants-!"

"If you don' shut up..."

The courtyard filled with giggles as girls turned away blushing and guys snorted out their milk.

"-and the feeling's like a sunshiny day! I take a look at my enormous penis, and everything is going my way!"

And so it continued, and by the end of his song nearly all of lunch A was falling out of their seats laughing. All but Shino, Gaara, and Sasuke that is. I tried not to laugh, but I didn't manage to cover a few snorts.

"I take a look at my enormous penis, and the good. Times. Are. Here. To. Stay!" Kiba finished up, now standing on the table.

Oh lord... Out of all the guys I sat with, I had ended up with the only three who didn't find it funny in the least. I really don't know what their problems are; he was freaking singing about his enormous penis; how much more comical do you get?

"Wow," Sasuke said, and I almost thought he was going to laugh, but I feel foolish now just thinking of thinking that, "That was... retarded."

I felt myself slump in disappointment. Sasuke never shared opinions with me on all the small things like that. Like when he had tried to get me to wear nail polish and spike my hair a million times, but a million times I refused. At least we shared views on the big things, like sexual preferences, religion, that stuff.

Since we grew into making those decisions together and at the same time, we sort of decided them together; we came to a conclusion by ricocheting off one another's ideas. Clever, yeah?

Well, for an eight year old, right?

Kiba hopped down from the table where his short performance had taken place, and smiled goofily at us. "Ha, you like it?"

I felt myself twitch. Like it? It was hard to say. Like it didn't really place my feelings...

"Back to the main subject," said Gaara irately, "Just stop by around three and we can practice together. Bring your script and try and invite Ten ten, since she's one of the main characters as well."

Shino nodded. "You have a computer?"

"Yeah..."

"Alright, I have my CD that holds the music and sounds that will be in the play, so it will be like the real thing."

"That should really make us ready for Wednesday!" said Kiba. He was thickly ignored. "Damn you all to rot in hell," he snarled.

"Well," Shino said, his mysterious voice making me shiver, " See you later. He grabbed Kiba's hand and was ready to leave, when Kiba snatched his hand away.

"I can walk by my-" he stumbled away in anger, his feet squelching on the wet grass.

His knees shook as they hit hard against the edge of the bench and he collapsed onto the seat.

The same seat as Gaara.

He practically took up the same space as Gaara, almost draped over him.

And his mouth for sure took up the same area as Gaara's.

Don't play stupid now; you know what I mean.

The second time I'd seen a friend get their first kiss taken from them.

And it burned like fire over my entire soul.

Owwie...

**TBC**

-----

(5): Changed him to the vice principal since I accidentally made Kurenai the Language Arts teacher. I'll go back and edit later.

To Cassidy: Brilliance... Though her plot is to keep me from responding... Ha, flower.pot! We're talking about you behind your back! Soon I shall have an entire army against your not reply button ness! Gimme your email address or I'll get all Mangekyou Sharingan on your booty! If I was... an... Uchiha... and I was... looking you in the eye... and killed my closest friend... Damn.

So... is Sasori's hair red or silver? I've found a way to add Sasori and Deidara so I wanted to make sure... I've seen more of red, but I've seen a lot of silver too...

Anyone anti-SasoDei? Say so now so I don't add that pairing without a warning in the summary (which is boring to do and takes up all my character limit).

Same reason why I can't have KisaIta, which is one of my favorite Akatsuki pairings... If someone disagrees with the pairings then I'll add the characters, but I won't pair them, 'K? Ha, and I know I added a bit of KakaIru in here, but I guess I wasn't thinking, and I'm not taking it out. Bwahaha.

Chapter 352... Oh Suigetsu, how I love you, I am such a fangirl. (0)(0) Suigetsu, you're the best ++ Lawl.

So stole that from Naruto Abridged... More importantly, 352! I loved the ending, with the... stuff! I had to read it a billion times and stare several minutes at every picture of Suigetsu.

A friend of mine and I were having conversation about this chapter; Kiba being in the drama club too. She said he should be a jock, and I said no way, and then she suggested they be in an animal rights club, and I said ok, but I originally wanted them to both be in the drama club, to show that Kiba isn't afraid to be in front of large audiences, so... owned.

Random Crack Play:

Script:

Kiba: I will forever be mighty, for I am Romeo, the great, great Romeo! Thou shall bow to me and my awesomeness!

Ten ten: Oh, Romeo, you so pwn the world!

And so they have a buncha lines... and Gaara's lines? Or... line?

Gaara: Oh... I'm dieing. _Dies._

Audience: S_tanding ovation._

This chapter was short! Wah! Gomenasai!


	10. Their Romeo or Juliet

**Those Weird Feelings No One Ever Gets**

Well, well, well, look who decided to keep promises.

Man, I suck.

Yeah, well, I reread this entire fanfic and thought, "Even if my fans all hate me now I must continue for the sake of me liking my own fanfic."

So, my conclusion is that you _may_ kill me once I finish writing this fanfic.

-----

Sasuke didn't carry me the rest of the day.

I know he was respecting my space and feelings but...

Wah, I felt so lonely.

Gaara is -not- the type to go for another guy so easily just because he kisses him but... If it happened once it could happen again.

Damn, my luck is bad.

Neji was openly surprised to find me disregarding him after school. I would have laughed if I hadn't been upholding my sorrow.

It was actually kind of silly; being sad.

Not like there was no reason to be sad.

Though I had far more problems then some guy kissing the person I had a little crush on.

I didn't even know his last name... Actually, I didn't even know if he had a last name...

Sasuke told Neji that we had to clean his garage after school and no he didn't have time later.

It was seriously gross when Sasuke called him "babe" and told him he didn't want him to get dirty.

Man, I tell you, that would have been an insult to me but that freak took it in stride. I felt it was in order to mention his breaking a finger nail as well.

Sasuke held his skateboard under his arm the entire walk to his house and said nothing.

I was indecisive as to whether I preferred this or not.

Part of me wanted to tell him about what I was thinking. Another part said this was just plain stupid because not even I knew what I was thinking.

Why did I care? I knew I wanted Sasuke and no matter how far out of my reach he was I had eyes for no one but him.

Perhaps it was the way everything I wanted and held near was being snatched out from under my nose, as if my parents and childhood hadn't been enough?

Or maybe my manlyish pride was kicking in at last after all these years and I was jealous that everyone was losing kiss virginity but me?

Or _maybe_ something was planted into my body by the jealous waitress at breakfast and now I was being controlled to overreact and freak out about everything and soon I would be hyperventilating over my Cheerios and Sasuke would leave me for good and have Neji on one arm and the waitress on the other?

I'm getting the feeling that it's not the last one...

Without a word Sasuke decided that yes, we should go to Starbucks, no, you're not having any caffeine, and yes, you can have a blue berries and cream frappichino.

Lucky for him he knew me too well and knew exactly how I liked it.

We strolled back down the street once more, and I was still in a daze that Sasuke hadn't cracked the old joke that, "How is it blue berry and cream if you don't have whip cream on the top?" when he stopped.

I looked up from my drink to see what he'd stepped in when Sasuke turned to me slowly and casually and said, "...You're OK... right?"

It was a very good question.

Yes, I'm fine physically and mentally. No, I'm not OK, first the love of my life is stolen from me and now I'll never be able to look the runner up in the eye again. Yes, I'm with my best friend, a blue berries and cream frappichino and there's no homework; what could be better? No, my entire family is dead, my best friend is preoccupied with his new boyfriend, and I cry at night when I think about you.

"Yeah..."

He stopped to sip his coffee.

"... Why do you like that kid so much?"

He didn't look at me.

"... Why do you like that freak show so much?"

I meant to hit the nail on the head, but I didn't think I'd hit it _that_ hard.

"Neji?"

"No, that other weird guy that you're dating."

"You just don't know him..." I felt the concrete crack beneath my feet as Sasuke glared holes into it.

"Well, you don't know Gaara."

"Neither do you!"

"Better then you do!"

"At least I know Neji well!"

"Well enough to suck his tongue out of his face?"

"Yes, that well!"

"Since when? You've known him no more then two weeks! Did you even know him before that kiss?"

"... I didn't but... but you never heard what he said to me... I don't know where you went but you missed it!"

"You see! It's the same with... He's..."

We stopped talking and slowly looked at each other.

The idea that we could have possibly been fighting was worse then imagining that we'd both eaten dog poop from a tray made of rotten horse liver using the still venomous fangs of a snake for forks.

Yeah, it was pretty bad...

I didn't know what to say. It felt like the end, though I knew it was just going to end up as another beginning, but nonethe less I felt dirty, ashamed to have fought, though I'd hardly said anything that rude...

Sasuke began walking again. "I'll tell you."

And tell he did...

"After you left I managed to head him off but he didn't even try to turn around or pass me. He just stopped and looked at me... It was... weird... He... really respects me. I know... I know you respect me, but he... I've never felt so significant. It's like he feels I'm a god. It's not in that creepy worship way or retarded obsession way... I think he feels that I'm... I dunno, I've never... felt it before... The way he wants me... After you left he didn't say anything... he just gave me this look and this nod and it seemed like his attitude toward me... I couldn't just force him to stay where he was on that road... I just... don't know..."

I'm proud to say that if I were explaining how I feel about Sasuke it would be a lot cleaner then that.

And a lot more romantic and heart felt, might I add.

With the phrase, "burning passion" more then once.

Yeah, I had noting to say. I know for fact that he took my silence the wrong way, but what would I say. "Good, I approve, stay with him and marry"? I wanted him to myself, that would totally ruin it. "I don't care, he's slime, dump him". Sasuke would probably forget who I am and what I was to him in the small time of a week.

We made it to his house and it was clear Itachi understood the situation right away. Poor Kisame however...

"Hey, kids, up for some-? Whoa, what's with the getup? Gonna have a slumber party? Hello? Anyone home?"

Officially: No.

Sasuke and I just sat. Not often does that happen. Breathing and sitting. Just sitting and breathing.

I, personally, didn't know what to say without ruining anything so my mind was coming up with my opinion of what Sasuke was thinking.

That idiot, following me home, why didn't he just get lost? If he doesn't like my boyfriend then he can't like me. Over seven years isn't as valuable as my two weeks with Neji anyway...

Yeah, he was probably imagining someone in pink panties and a small, pink top, but you can never be too careful.

"I guess I get it."

I said it... Well, Sasuke said it... at the same time I said it.

However, it was Sasuke who asked, "Get what?"

"I get why you hang out with Neji... I don't really get why it's him, but I get that... there's something... I don't see..."

"... Me too..."

Proudly presenting my next greatest accomplishment: Uzumaki Naruto hugs Uchiha Sasuke! Crowd goes wild!

He was warm, I was feeling lonely, end of story.

He hugged back.

I spent the night. Itachi offered me a guest room for the first time.

Mistress slept at the foot of my bed. I'm guessing she sleeps with Itachi because the room and bed smelt like Itachi and she never slept with Sasuke.

I imagined Itachi sleeping with Kisame and I ended up needing a glass of water and some water splashed on my face.

Nonetheless, good old Itachi knew what he was doing.

So far away I always felt when I slept alone in my house, and after our argument, being separated seemed as if Sasuke and I were calling a divorce. However, the same roof was already close, but the same bed... All I could see was what Sasuke had done in that bed with Neji. Maybe nothing... probably something...

Why was he here? Because he respected Sasuke. If it was respect he was looking for, Sasuke could have asked me. I would have booted up the honor and respect. Why did it have to be another person? Perhaps it was that I was his best friend, not his lover. Perhaps it was because he just didn't like me like that... or at all.

The more I think the more depressed I get. I know Sasuke loves me: I don't know how and I don't know why, but in some twisted way he does, and if I can't trust him enough to believe at least that then I can't trust that he's really a male, and just trust me without question on this one, he is definitely a boy.

The next morning I opened my eyes to see the embarrassingly familiar picture of Itachi in a frilly pink apron telling me to get up and I quickly sped to the bathroom to escape where I found Kisame flossing his dangerously sharp teeth.

"Oh, hey, sorry..." I said, "You mind?"

"Nah, go ahead," he said, plucking his floss out from between his teeth, "You sleep OK? I know you had to sleep in Itachi's bed and his bed in sort of lumpy..."

I do not want to know how he knows that.

"Yeah," I unzipped my pants and let myself go, "I was fine... Uh, out of curiosity, where did Itachi sleep?"

"With me," said Kisame, tossing his string of floss in the garbage can and putting away the floss.

"Ah." Oh my good lord, ew. Ew, ew, ew, ew! How strange and bestiality-like. I start gagging just thinking about it...

Yes, now that you've told me you've slept with my best friend's brother you can get out of here.

Without a word he did just that and I almost fell to my knees in relief and shock.

Sasuke sat next to me at breakfast and I leaned over to whisper to him once Itachi was preoccupied with Kisame.

"Did you know your brother slept with Kisame last night?" I said fervently.

"So?" Sasuke said through the largest mouthful of eggs I've ever seen a human intake.

"Are they...?"

"Human? Yes."

"No, you moron, are they... dating?"

He said nothing but pointed. I looked up and watched as Itachi mentioned something about a great day and kissed Kisame's oddly blue cheek. Kisame grinned and waved before going to the back door.

Yeah, well, I kind of screamed in a not-too-loud way.

"You said homosexual couples are OK!" Sasuke said, outwardly broken hearted. He gripped his shirt for effect.

"Itachi and... But it's...!"

Utterly disturbing is what I call it. Too many people are getting into homosexual relationships lately. If I wasn't in So Cal I'd start freaking out. But what, are straights a dying breed or something?

"No, I understand," Sasuke whispered as we watched Itachi and Kisame waiting at the door. They stood there for the longest time, talking, Kisame laughing and Itachi fixing Kisame's shirt collar.

I turned back to my eggs, asking them why and when and how long but they just looked up at me with big yellow faces.

I think my problem is that I'm not observant enough and they've been going out ever since I met them and I never knew.

Who the hell else was, is, or had been gay...? It was funny in a creepy way...

"Oh my god," I gasped as I stabbed my egg.

"Woah, woah, calm down," Sasuke said, grabbing my fork from me, "I know it's a shock, but believe me, all eggs spew yellow slime when you stab them, OK? And I don't, so don't even think-"

"What if my own father was gay and I never knew it?" I said, feeling my own forehead, "I feel so..."

"Betrayed? Lied to? Hungry? Horny? You know, if it's the last one-"

"Your father was not gay," Itachi said simply, sitting down across from the two of us at their large kitchen table.

"...Do you-" I started.

"Cross dress? Strip? Prostitute yourself?"

"Would you stop trying to finish my sentences?" I growled, shoving Sasuke's head.

"I do not."

"Do not what?" Sasuke and I said together.

"Do any of those," he seemed kind of shaken as he sipped his tea.

"Oh..." I tapped my fork on my plate, "Uh, well... do you mind... uh, tell-"

"It's been three years."

How does he do that?

"You've been... dating...?"

"You're just don't pay any attention," said Sasuke with his toast half way shoved in his mouth.

"I have another crucial question. Why doesn't he-"

"-have all the manners I do. I have no idea."

"I was secretly brought by the police; we're not real brothers," Sasuke said and it would have sounded cool and indifferent if he had swallowed his toast first.

With my luck the rest of my day would be just as disturbing and everyone would admit they were gay and had been dating someone of the same sex for the last three years, Neji would admit to being a lesbian, dump Sasuke and I'd have him to myself.

With my luck my day ended up being so normal I found it more disturbing then not.

Sasuke and I rolled on over to school and we ended up being too early to even get into the building.

We sat in silence side by side on the steps. I was watching the birds and I believe Sasuke was replaying a porno in his head, but I could be wrong.

There was so much to say. Starting with "sorry" was the best route but then what? Sorry for what? Speaking my mind? I wasn't sorry for that and I wans't sorry for being rude when I did so.

Sasuke had been unintentionally rude for the last few weeks and his boyfriend was a total ass hole and Sasuke was responsible for him like a parent is responsible for their kid so he was, there for, extra rude.

OK, I'm sorry. I'm... noy sorry, but I want you to apologize. I'm sorry for hating your boyfriend because it's hard on you, but I still hate him.

"I'm sorry."

I looked up. Was that me or him? I was sure I hadn't said anything...

"Listen I... know you don't like Neji and... I know that my hanging out with him gives less time for just us... but... I'm going to try to make sure things work out... and... and I'm not going to force you but... can you put up with one date with him? We'll just... I dunno, go to the arcade together, the three of us..."

Like that snot knows how to play video games.

"I..."

I don't like Neji. Dunno if you've noticed, blinded by his non-existent awesomeness, but he doesn't really like me either. He's an ass and I don't know what you see in him but I know what he sees in you and trash like him isn't worthy of your respect and love.

I don't like Neji, never will and never would I spend over three minutes with him of my own free will.

If we all go out together things will get sticky. You don't know it but he's my competition so it's your own fault if I push him in front of a moving car on the way there.

"I guess it's worth a shot."

A bird flew away from out ruckus.

I can't tell if it was a tackle or a hug...

"I'm sorry I have to do this..." he said to me.

Too many horror/suspense/thriller movies: I thought he was going to slit my throat or something.

Nah, he just hugged me and it wasn't until after he let go and stood up that I realized that he was sorry that he had to make things hard: hard on me and hard on us, not that he was sorry that he had to hug me.

I untied his shoe lace as he stood watching the clouds move over head.

"I'm sorry too."

He looked down at me and kicked my hand as I untied his other shoe lace. "Sorry for what?"

"Sorry that you have to make it hard." I turned away and watched the clouds as well.

If that was the only way to be one with him then by damn I would stare at the clouds all day.

"You moron," he said, using my knee as a perch where he tied his shoe at.

He looked at me and he told me that he was sorry he had to make it hard but he wasn't sorry that he liked Neji and that he wasn't going to stop dating him, but he wasn't going to stop loving me either.

Yeah, he didn't say anything but that's what he told me. You get it, right?

As I stated, uneventful day. Gaara invited me to his house to watch him and the rest of the cast practice "Romeo and Juliet". He told me Sasuke could come but Sasuke said he was going to be pimping out his skate board.

It took me a while but I built up the nerve to ask him if he was really going to be hanging out with Neji.

Yeah. Yes, he was.

Then why doesn't he just say it in the first place?

Because he doesn't want me to feel like Neji's more important.

... Well... who is more important?

He told me I was, duh, and said he was going to catch up with Neji and left me alone in the hallway.

Gaara found me standing there, half shocked and half giddy with joy, and told me we should walk home together.

I was quiet for once and that left him silent as well.

I don't know why but I kind of expected him to talk for once.

Finally we reached his house (it was nice looking) and he dumped a load of paper in one can, a bag of plastic in the next and another bag of glass in the second to last.

He walked me to his front door and I said, "What's up with all the recycling?"

"Saving the world," he shrugged.

"You know, we have a club for that."

"I know, I'm in it."

He was oddly involved for a kid who never talks to anyone.

"What other clubs are you in?"

"Sculpture, poetry, future leaders."

"Sculpture?"

He opened the door.

Hell yeah, he was in sculpture.

The entire living room was a museum of fine vases, statues, and figures.

"Holy shit..." I mumbled.

Being loud felt like the entire room would collapse.

"They're all mine."

He led me to the kitchen, which was nice but more klutz friendly, and tossed me a soda.

"How long have you been sculpting?" I said after a tastefully long and loud burp.

"Since I can remember." He pointed to a mess of sticks, leaves, and dirt, "My uncle saved my very first piece."

I whistled low and long. "He must like your stuff."

"Dunno, he never told me."

"He must like your new stuff."

"Maybe." He sipped his soda. "He's in an psychiatric center."

"Oh." Damn I hate it when that happens. You assume that you're one of the only people whose parents are gone and so you forget that everyone else might be alone too. It brings out my inner idiot.

He caught me before I threw my can in the garbage can.

"Oh yeah..." I said as he put it in a special can labeled "aluminum". "So, who do you live with?"

"Sister brother and dad," he said.

"Really? No one's here..."

"Sister's at rugby practice, brother's at some theater contest, dad's the mayor so he's always gone."

"Mayor of _here_?" I asked, astonished, "As in, all of here?"

"Yeah."

I shut my mouth with a snap. "But we live in, like, a really big... I mean, it's Long Beach, for Christ's sake!"

Mental breakdown much?

He shrugged, "Someone has to do it."

"So you moved from a different high school, not a...?"

"We moved from down by the beach to up here."

I gripped my hair. "This is like... worse then being the mayor of L.A.!"

"Not really," he said, and he finally smiled. Actually, it was a smirk, but it was close enough. Well... not really, but it would have to do.

"But it must suck being the mayor! I mean, this place is full of crime and crap..."

"He's not the friendliest of people."

I eyed a bowl of M&M's sitting on his counter. "Glad you don't see him a lot?"

He slid the bowl towards me. "Yeah. We get on well enough by ourselves."

Through the sensation of a red M&M I decided against asking about his mom. If he wanted me to know then-

"Yeah, so, just us three most of the time. Mom asked her brother to watch over us before she died but he's shown us why it's bad to try and raise kids."

"What was wrong with him?" I asked, popping a brown M&M in my mouth.

"He decided that since my mom died giving birth that he'd blame me for her death and... yeah, it got kinda messy." He pulled up his shirt and, I'll admit, it was extremely uncomfortable to be blushing when he pointed to a large, white scar on his stomach.

I held my breath until he lowered his shirt and even then I was ready to pass out.

His stomach. That was hot, that was really hot... He has abs... He has abs! If I could get my hands-

Ew, I'm perverted like Sasuke!

I hang out with the wrong crowd, I really do. What would Dad think of me?

_"You damn perverted kid you."_

Now that was really creative.

"...tried to kill me," Gaara finished.

Did I ever mention that I sometimes forget that I should be paying attention to someone rather then something totally different?

No? Well... now you know.

I coughed up a gulp of soda. "Your uncle did?"

"Yeah."

I filled a dreadful silence with my hacking up soda.

Jesus, is everyone in this damn world gay with a tragic past?

"Hey, are you gay?"

Oops. No, no, wait, wait, that's not what I meant.

"Hm?" He looked up from his soda can where I guess he was reading the nutritional facts. He does seem like the type to read the ingredients on the cereal box at breakfast...

I coughed again. "I said, how's your play?"

He gave me a "that's-not-what-you-said" look. "It's fine."

"What's with the small part?"

"I'm new." He broke off the little metal can opening thingy and dropped it into his his drink.

"That's a dumb reason," I grumbled, pocketing my own... little metal can opening thingy.

Bringing it home to Sasuke... I always feel ridiculous for doing things like that...

Does he think of me that often? Absently grabbing things for any of my collections that he knows would make me happy?

For the last three years I'd been picking up... those metal things from cans off the street. I would stop in the middle of blading in the middle of a busy street just to pick one up because I know, I know he'll smile when I give him that little thing...

He'll say, "What a waste of time, grabbing these when it's my collection," and then he'll stash it away and smile at me and the stupid, worthless little piece of trash metal will remind him and he'll say we should get a soda and then we'll go scavenging for the can tops and we'll end up laughing our asses off...

Does he think like that when he sees bottle tops?

What stupid questions I ask myself... He probably thinks that he'll feel guilty if he doesn't pick it up for me...

Or maybe he does want that one little moment of-

"Naruto?"

"What?" I jumped, "Oh, yeah."

"Did you want a napkin, I said."

"For...?" I looked down.

For a giant root beer spill down the front of my shirt. Right...

By the time I was as red as I could get, Gaara mopping up the front of my shirt with a paper towel, the door bell rang and Gaara set the soggy paper in my hand and rushed to the door.

Why, oh why, did he have to smile at me like that before he left?

Yeah, that kid down in my heart, he's totally up for double timing with Sasuke and Gaara.

I grabbed another towel and pressed it to my front.

What a compete and entire sicko.

Not me, I swear, I would never do that!

But that kid is... he's gross... and not me; I'm me, not him.

Gaara came back to the kitchen with Kiba and Shino trailing behind.

Oh my god! Are they gay too?

That was rude, please excuse me...

Kiba laughed and said something about Shino's great special effects.

Then he slapped his ass.

Oh my god! Are they gay too?

Well, didn't Sasuke do that to me a while back?

But... isn't he gay?

Holy shit...

Um, oh yeah, well, their practice thing went pretty coolly. That Ten Ten girl played Juliet and Kiba played Romeo.

It was funny because Kiba is the exact same height as Ten Ten rather then taller.

They started to skip the kissing scene but then Shino said that if they didn't practice, even that, that they would choke up on stage.

Kiba growled and blushed.

Oh my god! He must be gay.

But they kissed and it looked like they knew what they were doing.

Am I the only person on this friggin' planet who's never kissed anyone?

Anyone? Anyone but me?

I rest my case.

Yeah, so they practiced that once and then Shino said to do the scene over again, he messed up on the lighting, and they did and he said to do the kiss again and Kiba said why doesn't he kiss her instead and he said no and then Ten Ten said why doesn't he kiss Kiba and he said he would.

Yeah...

Everyone must be gay.

Halfway through one of the scenes Ten Ten had to answer her phone and then she started leaving, said her boyfriend was waiting out front to bring her to archery practice.

... Then Ten Ten's a really chesty guy. Because I swear the world consists of gays only.

"Then who's her boyfriend?" I asked once she was gone.

Kiba went "Ahhhhh" after a nice long drink, wiped his mouth with his sweater sleeve and said, "I know you know Hinata."

"She's dating Hinata?" I screeched.

"She said 'boyfriend' you moron," he snarled, "Anyway, have you ever met her cousin?"

"No..."

"Hyuuga Neji?"

"Oh, yeah, what about him?"

"Well didn't you just ask who her boyfriend is?"

"Yes."

"And I'm telling you it's Neji."

Mmhmm... Mmmmmmmmhmmmmmm...

Hmmm...

Mmmmm...hmmmmm...

"Hyuuga Neji..." I said slowly, scratching the side of my face.

"Jesus, you know, long pony tail, looks like a girl."

"... Yes."

"Well that's him, jeez." He crushed his empty soda can on my head.

"He's shocked because he thought Neji was a girl," said Shino, wrapping up a wire and fitting it into his bag.

"Neji's... Sasuke's boyfriend..."

"Yeah, I heard about that," said Kiba, "Looks like he's two timing then because I know for fact that Neji's dating Ten Ten. They sit together in the back of my art class."

"...And..."

"They make out, duh," said Kiba, rolling his eyes.

"But... he does that with Sasuke..."

Shino looked at me like I'd just said that Neji breaths, "He's cheating, then."

"... I have to... go."

And go I did. I grabbed my skates and was half way down the drive way before they were on properly.

Cheating. Neji. Neji was... Neji... cheating.

How the hell does that work? Neji can't just cheat on Sasuke. Sasuke's Sasuke. He would know. He could tell...

Did he know? He had to know. Was it true? Kiba said he saw it... was that before he was dating Sasuke? Perhaps Ten Ten has a knew boyfriend.

I saw it at a stop light. Ten Ten was sitting shot gun.

I skidded to a halt by the window and tapped.

Ten Ten seemed shocked.

Neji was even more shocked.

"Ah, Naruto!" said Ten Ten, holding a hand to her heart, "You scared me."

"Is this your boyfriend?"

"Huh?" she looked at Neji, "Yes, this is my-"

"Good luck at your play," I said quickly, and before either could say a word I snapped a picture with my phone and started off again.

I did not look back at the car.

Sasuke...

Would he believe me?

Sasuke...

He knew I didn't like Neji...

Sasuke... please believe me...

But... I had... I had proof...

Sasuke...

Would he believe me or Neji?

Sasuke! Please...

I didn't stop to take off my skates.

Itachi waved to me from the couch from behind a newspaper.

Itachi...

"Itachi!" I shouted, pulling out my phone as I stopped in front of him, "Neji is-"

"Cheating? I know."

Well...

"Does Sasuke-?"

"No."

"Do I-?"

"Do what you think is right."

"Will he b-"

"You'll know if you show him."

There was a long silence followed by a loud bang, that was me, hitting the wall before backing up and making it through the entry way to the hallway properly.

"Sasuke!" I shouted, slamming his door open.

He was sitting on his bed with his headphones on, folding paper cranes.

He always did believe that tale from "Suduko and the Thousand Paper Cranes"...

I stared.

He was peaceful. At ease.

Would he still be able to compose himself like that after I told him what I knew...?

I hugged him. He had started looking up just before I grabbed him but he didn't say a thing.

He rubbed my back. Consoling me... He wasn't seeing...

"Sasuke..."

"What's up?"

I pulled away and pulled out my phone.

"Aw man, break your phone again? Listen man, we'll buy you a new one. Hey, we should get unlimited texting this time! I.L.U.L8er."

He made the key pad motions with his hands.

"Do you know who Ten Ten is?"

He raised an eye brow. "No..."

I showed him a picture I had taken of the cast of Romeo and Juliet. I pointed at Ten Ten.

"Ah... OK? You like her?"

"No... but... I know someone who does..."

"I thought we agreed to keep rumors out of our-"

"No! It's... She had to go around five o' clock; her boyfriend was picking her up for archery."

"Oh, it's because she's ta-"

"What time did Neji leave here?"

"Uh, not long ago wh-"

"What time, Sasuke?"

"Jeez, I don't know!" he had started leaning away. Man, he wasn't going to get it.

"Was he in a red Honda?"

"Yeah..."

"Where'd he say he was going?"

"Home to dinner?"

"He lied."

"Stupid! He called his mom to ask if dinner was ready and then he said he'd be right over! You've got to-"

"He was picking up Ten Ten from-"

"You just said Ten Ten went with her boyfriend!"

"Well don't you get it?" I growled, "Who do you think her boyfriend is? Kiba even said-"

"How can you trust that imbecile? Can't you just ac-"

"I don't trust him, I trust my own two God damn eyes!"

I flipped open my phone.

I pointed to the person in the back of the picture.

"I took this on my way over."

He took the phone from me and stared hard at the picture.

He was getting the point.

He was seeing.

-----

Wahhhh, read Naruto chapter 384 today. Holy shit. I ran out of my room, ran into a wall, and called my friend the moment I finished, then read it four more times.

I can't get over the fact that there was a butt shot of Itachi _and_ Sasuke.

I'm a little out of practice in this style of writing but I'll get back into the groove.

I'm curious: What does everyone think Sasuke will do after/if he beats Itachi? Man, I hope he helps Naruto and the rest in the fight against Tobi...

And Tobi and Sai were in the anime! How strange it was...

OK, that's all. Oh, and I recommend you all to taste Cheese Cake Hershey Kisses. It was weird but tasteful...


	11. Ten Ten is a Male

**Those Weird Feelings No One Ever Gets**

So, here I am.

Yeah, I'm proud to say that I'm writing this the same day that I posted last chapter.

On New Year's Eve... I have no life and nothing to do. And currently it's a little over three hours to 2008.

So, what's the zodiac this year? Who will be dancing at the banquet?

Yeah... Fruits Basket... Aharharhar...

I read all your reviews. I fear for my life (still) and I thank you all.

And I'm shaking my fist at you, flower.pot!

But that aside, let us be off!

-----

It was silly but I checked the clock and found it had been fifteen minutes that Sasuke was staring at my phone.

I'm still debating whether he was trying to be sure it was Neji or if he was in shock.

I couldn't blame him. Even I, who hates Neji with a thousand blades of yakkablakka bleck through his chest and down his riffergubbba throat until he burns forever in some kind of skillet... find it surprising.

No doubt my surprise is different than Sasuke's... Sasuke trusted him and believed he could respect him and be respected by him...

I'm just surprised to hear he's dating a girl, or that a girl would date him at all.

Honestly, I thought Neji was trash and shit and scum but I didn't expect him to go so low that he'd cheat. I'm not shocked that he's cheating but I thought enough of him that I could trust my best friend in his hands.

I was more anticipating Sasuke's reaction and proud and surprised of myself for remembering to take a picture.

"That's Neji."

That was a start...

Then he laughed. It was soft and low and cracking but it was a laugh.

It got creepy when he was full out cackling and rolling around on his bed.

"Man!" he cried, sitting up with a strange smile on his face, "Man alive! How glad I am that Itachi used to take archery!"

He grabbed his skate board and sped out of the house.

What in hell was that?

Let us find out, shall we?

I followed on blades as Sasuke sped down the street, weaving through cars and past people and over cars and under people and slamming into cars and jumping over people.

He had no idea where he was going...

Take it back. He only seemed like he didn't, but there was the red Honda, parked by the shooting range. (6)

But I guess he didn't know how to get in properly because he stopped by the railing of the bridge we were on and looked down upon it.

"We're gonna wait..." he said, eying Ten Ten and then looking to Neji.

He laughed when he saw Neji. I think he was imagining what he was going to do to him.

Then he slammed the edge of his skateboard to the railing, leaving a fine dent, and he turned his back to the shooting range.

I was scared (for Sasuke, of course) but still my heart smiled. He believed me. He really believed me...

He believed me so strongly that he was about to kill a guy...

"Hey, hey, Sasuke I know you're mad but... Listen, don't kill him!"

"Killing him would only put him out of his misery," he said sadistically, "I have to keep him on edge. We'll teach him to wrong an Uchiha. We'll teach him to mess with my best friend..."

He was grinning like a maniac... well, actually, I think he is a maniac but still...

Fingering his skateboard, Sasuke looked back down at the practice. They were taking a break and Ten Ten was standing by Neji, laughing and chatting.

I only watched them begin to kiss for a split second before I looked to Sasuke.

He was jumping over the bridge.

"Sasuke! Don't kill yourself over that one guy!"

He landed smartly on his feet.

I looked to the archery practice. They were too far away to notice.

I looked back down. Sasuke had his arms outstretched to me.

"Dear Venus. What have you done to us? Why is this happening to me?"

As I prayed I swung my legs over the railing and let myself drop.

"You know, Venus, I wouldn't be doing this if it weren't for you."

Sasuke was still smiling evilly when he caught me.

"Amen."

"You said you were agnostic."

"I was praying to the Roman god of love."

He touched a hand to his heart like he was having a stroke. "Good grief, I thought you were doing something weird like praying to the Christian god, or Alla."

"What's wrong with that?"

"... Anyway! We have a life to destroy."

I sighed.

"We could be arrested for-"

"Let us be off!" He punched his fist to the hair and grabbed my hand.

And off we were indeed.

Note to self: Bushes are not friends.

"Ow, god damn it, Sasuke, why did you have to choose a thorn bush?"

Especially ones with large prickers.

"Well, it was this or get caught!"

And bees.

"Ow! Ow!" I swatted several times, "Well, he'll see you eventually!"

"I want to wait until the crowds have passed!"

And ants.

"Eck! Well, go kill him now so I can get out of this damn bush, for the sake of my fine body!"

"That is something to waste... However! You see, I've formed a plan. You're going to stop him and start discussing the fact that he's a dirty two timer and that he should go rot in hell and then, once everyone has gone home but him and his slut, I'm going to hit him upside the head!"

"She's not a slut!"

"Just tell me my plan is good so people won't get suspicious of a talking bush!"

"You're only going to hit him once?"

"I'm going to hit him on random days so he'll become paranoid, see? Amidst that I will begin calling his house and he'll believe I'm going to come after him, and he'll get really scared, see? And then I'm going to tell him about how wrong he was to treat my friend like shit and to believe I was dumb enough to never find out about him cheating, see? Then he'll never come near me again. But, see, I'll be following him and-"

"Did you hear that?"

We've been caught! I clung to the branches of the bush for comfort but my hands just started bleeding more.

"Probably a rabbit."

"Shoot it!"

"I'll miss!"

"Then I'll shoot it!"

I looked in the direction of Sasuke with wide eyes but found nothing but leaves and darkness. Nonetheless, I knew he was still there...

An arrow hit my roller blade and I near about died.

I looked down at my blades and a big arrow protruded from it.

I love you skates. I really do. Remind me to treat you to nachos sometime, because I owe you one...

"I think you missed."

"Not like you'd have hit it!"

"Would you punks settle down? Keep practicing or I'll make you stay after!"

"Yes ma'am."

Why did it have to be archery practice? Oh, why?

"Ah, shoot! I missed again!"

I think that one hit Sasuke... I smell blood. Why... why?

It had to have been at least three hours... My cell phone told me it had been forty minutes.

Liar.

"Go talk to him!" Sasuke hissed.

No time to waste. I jumped from the bush and strolled smoothly over to Neji where he was talking to Ten Ten and handing her a water bottle.

I stepped up right when he had been leaning closer.

"Neji."

He jumped.

Ahaha! Unlimited texting says I.H8.U!

"Ah, Naruto!" said Ten Ten, smiling, "I didn't know you were into archery!"

"He's not," Neji scowled, staring hard at me, "How did you find out, you little fuck?"

"Neji!"

"Reliable sources, you piece of shit."

"Wh-what is this, Neji?" Ten Ten said, stepping away. She grabbed a hold of an arrow too, which scared the hell out of me.

"Just a friend."

"You don't deserve friends!" I bit at him and turned to Ten Ten, "Listen to me, this guy has been cheating on you!"

"Wh... N-no! No he hasn't!"

"Sure you have, hm? Gonna tell your girl friend or are you going to lie to her too?"

"Don't listen to him, Ten, he just wants to date you, probably." He took her hands and smiled at her. "I'd never do something so-"

"I already know who I love and I'm doing this for their benefit, not mine or hers. If she doesn't was to believe me, that's fine, but I know you know and I know someone else that knows."

"I would never cheat on my girlfriend!"

"But you'll cheat on your boyfriend!"

"I don't have a boyfriend!"

"N-neji?"

"Oh, then Sasuke's a girl?"

"I don't know who you're talking about! Get away from us, you're crazy!" He pulled Ten Ten towards his car, "C'mon, we should call the police."

Ten Ten looked at me hard.

Oh, boy. She believed me.

"Who?" she asked me, tears welling up but a stern expression on her face.

I was sure if I told her she'd shoot an arrow at them.

"I can't say."

No, but I could show you. I grabbed Neji by the wrist as Sasuke stepped coolly out of the bush, his skateboard behind his back.

"Hello there, _babe_," said Sasuke, stepping up to Neji and nodding, "Having a good time?"

"Wh-what the hell are...? Ah, how are you?"

"Oh, I'm just fine. How's your little friend here?"

Ten Ten looked to Sasuke.

She wasn't dumb. She knew who this was.

"She's... fine-"

"I bet you think she's fine," Sasuke snapped, right in Neji's face, "That's the only reason you're with her, hm? Because she's fine? Because she's hot? Because she's a blast in bed?"

"I don't know what you're thinking but we're not like that."

"Neji?" Ten Ten snapped, "Not like what?"

"Sw... Ten..."

"You said you loved me!" Ten Ten sobbed, tears spilling down her face.

"Strange," said Sasuke, patting Neji's cheek, "You said the same thing to me."

"Sasuke, listen to me..."

"Listen to what?" he said as if asking what Neji wanted for breakfast, "More lying? More swooning? About how much I should trust you and how much you respect me? Listen to your compliments and intelligence? You may have been smart and you may have trusted me and you may have respected me..."

He kissed Neji's cheek.

I gagged.

He swung his skateboard up and it cracked as it hit Neji's head.

I blinked in shock and grinned like monkey.

"But you also fucked around. And fucking, my dear, is meant up the ass and in bed only. You were sticking it in a whole 'nother place."

"I don't think he heard that last part."

"Nobody cares," he said with a smirk, stepping on Neji's face.

I smiled and looked to Ten Ten.

She was on her knees, eyes wide, tears sparkling.

Oh yeah... she was a girl... Duh.

"H...Hey..." I said, kneeling down in front of her, "You OK?"

She sobbed lightly.

"H-he... never... I..."

I smiled warmly. "Listen if he was going to do something like that he didn't deser-"

Is that "Ten Ten is a Chesty Male" offer still up?

Because she just stabbed an arrow through his hand.

"You're probably fucking your cousin too..." she growled, pulling out a knife and holding it up to Neji.

"Uh..." I started.

Sasuke was watching with a smile. I looked at him with worry. Wasn't this going to far?

He kept grinning.

Ten Ten tossed Neji's pony tail all over his limp body.

Like I've said, too many action thrillers...

Ten Ten drove us home in Neji's car.

Sasuke sat up front and the two discussed everything that made a piece of the already solved puzzle.

"I can't believe I didn't see that!" Ten Ten cried, pressing a hand to the top of her head, "Picking up his cousin... yeah right."

Sasuke rolled his eyes and kicked his feet up on the dashboard. "Yesterday he told me he was going to his aunt's to clean her attic." He shook his head in shame.

"Uhm..." Ten Ten looked quickly from the road to Sasuke and back, "He told me he was going to a movie with his family..."

They were silent.

"That cheating, traitorous little shit!" Ten Ten shouted, slamming her fist on the steering wheel.

Sasuke leaned back in his chair.

He was plotting.

I, meanwhile, was being paranoid in that back seat.

No, I did not wet myself.

I decided that the best way to get out of things, just in case Neji or anyone else called the cops, was to tell Itachi.

Oh yeah, Itachi will already know by the time we get home. Yeah, he'll know what happened and he'll know what to do...

Ten Ten stopped at Sasuke's house.

"You need me to drive you home, Naruto?"

"He's staying here," Sasuke said, grabbing my hand. "Hey, wait out here, I have... some artistic qualities I'd like to spruce this car up with."

Ten Ten grinned and turned the engine off.

About fifteen minutes later Sasuke and I watched as Ten Ten drove off and the words "Give me a condom and I'll fuck anything," disappeared down the street.

"Won't he paint over it?" I asked as we stepped inside the back door, "I mean, he doesn't want the world to know that he really will fuck anything."

"True dat," said Sasuke, nodding and pulling a tomato from their fridge, "But not before everyone knows that he enjoys fucking sheep."

"How do you know this?" I gasped.

"Elementary, dear Watson," he said, tapping his nose.

"Don't tell me you let a sheep fucker fuck you?" I said, sticking out my tongue.

"I wouldn't let even you fuck me." He pulled out a can of whipped cream and topped his tomato.

"What?" I said, "And I'd been planning for so long... What the hell is that? A French side dish?"

"It's delicious is what it is," he said through a mustache of whipped cream.

I demonstrated my distaste by sticking my finger "down my throat".

"So, when was this fuck fest scheduled, my dear?"

I blushed. Duh... Duh! I keep forgetting that I like him like that...

"I was... joking," I muttered, slumping into a chair.

"Aw, no sex for Sasuke?"

"Not unless you want Neji's corpse."

"I'd screw a girl and I'd screw a boy but I wouldn't screw a freak like Neji and I wouldn't screw a corpse, and I certainly wouldn't screw Neji's corpse."

"Good," I mumbled, pulling a carton of cranberry juice from the fridge.

"Did I mention that I would screw boys? And blonds and idiots and blond idiots; which are basically one in the same, and roller bladers and people who look good in orange miniskirts."

"Man oh man, too bad my hair's purple," I said, lifting the juice carton to my lips.

"I believe it's yellow."

Itachi passed and pulled the carton from my hand while I spoke.

"Uh, so it is," I said, pulling on a lock of hair.

"Well, what do you know?" said Sasuke, hopping up to sit on the counter.

"Looks like someone's getting screwed tonight," said Itachi uninterestedly, handing me a glass of cranberry juice.

"I thought you told Kisame 'no more'," said Sasuke.

Itachi gave him The Look.

Let me explain. The Look consists of two things: pure hatred and the entire world slowing to a halt.

"I think he meant me," I said roboticly (7). A side effect of The Look.

Sasuke rolled his eyes but said no more.

"I did," Itachi drolled, "How was your little boyfriend?"

"Oh, just dandy," said Sasuke.

"Very well. I'll tell the police that you were home at the specified times."

Did I not tell you? I did tell you! Zat guy eez ze mastah.

Psshhoooooo.

"We _were_ home..." said Sasuke, cocking an eyebrow.

"Yes, I know, that's why I will be telling them that."

"It almost sounded like you were going to lie to them or something, jeez."

"Unthinkable." He swept out of the room with a quick wave.

"That guy, I think he's going daft."

"But we weren't home..."

Sasuke gave me a look like there was something wrong with me.

"Is there something wrong with you?"

I smacked my head, "Sorry, sorry, too much ramen; goes to my head."

"You better lay off that stuff, buddy, or the law might be after you."

I shook my head solemnly. "Jesus, what was I thinking? I have a wife, two kids and a job! How could I do something so stupid...?"

"Listen, pal," Sasuke said, setting a hand on my shoulder, "We all make mistakes. As long as you stop now things will be fine."

I sniffed exaggeratedly. "Y-yeah, s-sorry man..."

"Don't worry, these kind of things can be replaced."

"But it was your brothers right arm!"

"... Well, you know, we'll work it out. You just take a Tylenol and get to sleep."

"Right, right..." I ran a hand down my face.

Silence.

Laughter.

"Oh my god, that was dumb!" Sasuke said between laughs.

"You started it, dude, you totally started it!"

"Trend setter," said Sasuke, striking a pose, "Follow me blindly, minions.

"Pssh."

"I said follow me blindly!"

"Yes sir! Sorry sir!" I saluted.

I hadn't laughed so much all week.

It felt incredibly natural.

That night I slept in Sasuke's bed with Sasuke. We stayed up until twelve playing strip poker.

I lost.

I felt very naked.

I was very naked. Very naked indeed.

Sasuke said that, because I lost so bad I had to sleep in what I was wearing.

Which was nothing.

In the end he allowed me my boxers.

I've never appreciated thin cotton more.

Despite my position I was not harassed/molested/raped.

In fact, Sasuke kept to himself with his back to me.

Neither of us got much sleep.

I stayed up listening to Sasuke.

Sasuke stayed up crying.

He finally stopped and fell asleep after I turned over and hugged him.

It felt wholly like my fault.

I didn't cheat and I didn't tell the guy to cheat but... I didn't have to tell Sasuke he was cheating.

Did I?

...Yes I did.

"Did I...?" I mumbled when I knew Sasuke was asleep, "Did I do the right thing?"

I don't know a lot.

"Yeah, you did."

I smiled.

I don't know a lot, but I know Sasuke smiled too.

"Out of bed with your hands up!"

I jumped and looked to the door first thing. It was closed.

I looked to the person beside me. He was sitting Indian style and laughing at me.

"You should have seen your face!" he howled, "'O.M.G. they're come for me!'"

"Well, I didn't do anything, did I?" I snapped. "I.H.U."

"U.R.A.Q.T." He pinched me cheek.

I grumbled and started for the bathroom. "B.R.B."

Kisame gave me a funny look as I past.

"I knew they should have gotten that unlimited texting..." he said as I shut the bathroom door.

Itachi made breakfast again. And wore his pink apron.

I think he did it because Kisame liked.

Because Kisame did like it indeed.

Gaara mentioned the play that night at lunch and Sasuke mentioned having bought front row seats and I mentioned that I was madly in love with him and hugged him so tight he had to push me away.

That day in cooking we were making pudding. By the way.

"Alright, just do what you do and give it your best shot," said Miss Mitarashi with what Sasuke called a Naruto grin. Me looking like a freak lady like her? Yeah right...

"She did the grin!" Sasuke said as he started boiling some water.

"I know," I snapped.

"She's, like, your long lost sister."

I snapped several bars of chocolate into small pieces. "No. No she's not."

"I think she's kinda cute."

"Then you think I'm cute, you idiot," I chucked a chunk of chocolate at him.

He caught it... in his mouth.

"Yes."

"Yes what?" I said, dumping the chocolate in a bowl.

"Yes I do." He grabbed out a large rubber spatula.

"You do what?" I wined, dropping the bowl on top of the pot where the water was beginning to simmer.

"I do think so," he said, twirling his spatula.

"About what?"

If I were sitting reading this then I would have looked back to see what he thought so of, because I had already forgotten.

He kicked me lightly on the butt. "Yes. I do think you're cute."

The egg I'd been cracking dropped to the bottom of my bowl and splattered.

"Ah!"

Sasuke looked over my shoulder. "Do we have to have the egg yolk talk again?"

I hit him with the nearest wooden spoon. "Don't tell me things like that when I'm in the middle of a crucial operation!"

"Things like what?"

"Like telling me I'm cute!"

"Crucial operation?"

"I have to concentrate when I crack eggs, OK?"

"Or else this happens?" he smeared a drop of egg yolk over my nose.

I grabbed his hand and shoved his finger in his mouth.

"Did you know that raw eggs have the chance of giving you salmonella poisoning?"

He wiped his finger on his apron and stuck out his tongue.

"Ah hink mah tugg ith iffected!"

I handed him a glass of water and pushed him towards the melting chocolate.

"Is that even legal?" he said after a few minutes, "Wasn't that like an attempt at murder?"

"You won't die from salmonella poisoning."

"But you'll get sick! And then you die!"

"We'll make a deal," I said, stirring several ingredients, "If you die of salmonella poisoning I'll eat a dozen raw eggs."

"But why would I care if I'm dead?" he sobbed.

"OK, if you die I won't do anything."

"You won't mourn?"

"I'll mourn."

"For the rest of your life?"

"Sure."

"But why would you do that if I was dead?" he scoffed.

"OK. When you die of salmonella poisoning I'll just move on with my life."

"Now I'm for sure dying of salmonella poisoning?" he screeched.

"Just shut up and stir."

Yeah, and he shut up and he stirred.

"Hand me that serving cup," I said as I prepared myself to dish out our finished pudding.

Sasuke turned from his dish washing and handed me the two cups.

Silently.

"Thank you."

He turned back around and washed his dishes.

Silently.

Miss Mitarashi decided that since we had time we could either cool our pudding and eat it tomorrow or eat it warm right there in then; whichever we preferred.

Not a single kid in the class wasn't eating.

"Not bad," I said, with my spoon in my mouth.

Sasuke nodded.

"Would you talk already? Jesus."

"We're professional chefs. Badabing," he said, making a drum beat motion with his finger and spoon.

"Not professionally," I pointed out.

"No. Professional chefs just not professionally."

"Correcto."

"You have a mustache."

"Shit," I slapped my hand over my eyes, "I was supposed to keep looking young and reserved forever! How did I start getting old?"

"Avenged Sevenfold," said Sasuke, popping his spoon into his mouth, "And not that kind of mustache."

I looked out at him between my fingers. "What?"

Sasuke, who is a complete and entire pig, though not as bad as me, finished the rest of his pudding, like a pig, licked his lips, like a pig, and wiped his mouth, like a refined gentleman.

"Over here," he grunted, motioning me to come closer. With a sigh a shifted my pudding in front of the next seat over and sat myself in the chair next to Sasuke.

"What?"

"This mustache."

He grabbed my face.

OK, no, I've said a lot but this is one thing I don't know if I'll be able to say again...

What do you mean I have to say it?

I do not get payed for this!

No, I will not do it if you make Sasuke do... that...

Leave me alone!

OK, fine! Ugh...

He... licked my... mustache.

Apparently it was made of pudding.

Here I quote it was "slimy yet satisfying". (8)

Hey, a teenage boy can watch and enjoy Disney movies, can't he?

I don't want to go into detail...

Stop poking me with that thing!

OK! Fine!

It felt like slimy fish.

Happy?

And I didn't taste anything!

But pudding...

Now... Now leave me alone!

"Hmmm... I can't decide what tastes better, you or the pudding..." said Sasuke, smacking his lips tastefully.

I shoved him off his chair and scooted away in an embarrassed rage.

"Let's say it was the pudding and you can lick that instead."

"I didn't get that great of a taste of you, y'know," he said as he pulled himself back onto his chair.

"Good, let us leave it that way," I grumbled into a spoonful of pudding.

"Or you could just spend another night in my house in my bed..." he said scooting his index finger across the table towards me.

"Or I could spend the night at my own house after dinner at yours," I snapped, smashing his finger.

"Good plan, I'll come too."

"Now I remember why I decided I wouldn't give you a key to my house."

"Speaking of which, would you mind lending me one of yours?"

"I fear you'll rape me..."

"You have every right."

I looked at him. He grinned.

"Why don't you go buy yourself a dildo and a prostitute and leave me out of it?"

"It could be a threesome!"

"Foursome, including the dildo."

"Can I lick your face again?"

One. Two Three. Four. It skipped four beats this time.

Very good question indeed...

**TBC**

-----

(6): Holy mother of Bush, that's a real place. Good thing I know Long Beach well...

(7): That is not a real word.

(8): Lion King

I wonder if Neji died...

HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERY BODY!

Bring out the dancing tubas.

Let us bring in the new year with a big SasuNaru fuck fest.

No, then I'd have to change the rating...

Well, I think Sasori and Deidara will come in soon (Oh, Sasori and Deidara...)

And now I have to read "Romeo and Juliet" in order to do this whole play thing...

Ta ta for now.


	12. Black Thong

**Those Weird Feelings No One Ever Gets**

My email isn't sending me your review updates...

Oh the agony!

Because I just woke up and I'm lazy, please accept this as a reply to all your reviews:

Thanks a million! Dunno if I really will read Romeo and Juliet... and I'm not quite sure what's going to happen with Gaara.

Thank you again! And thanks to you, the anonymous reader who never reviews! Thanks for your silent support!

-----

I will start off by giving away all the stuff you were anticipating:

Sasuke did not lick my face again that day.

Sasuke did get a good taste of my face again that day.

Itachi did already know about the play.

We did end up in formal clothing.

I did not finish my pudding.

I wrapped it up with plastic wrap and headed out of the classroom with Sasuke.

"This really suits you," he said, tapping the plastic wrap he'd wrapped around my head.

I shook my head in his face and his bangs became staticy.

He shrieked and fell to his knees.

"Of all the bloody things, why this?" he licked his hands and pressed his bangs down.

"I still can't believe your brother thinks I should marry you... Probably to get you off his hands..."

"Stop acting cool," he said, grabbing my ankles, "Aren't you the goofy one here?"

"If you weren't such a dork, I would be," I said, sticking out my tongue.

"Timber!" he shouted.

Timber? What the hell? Doesn't that mean wood? Or when some thing's... falling?

Oh, me.

Right...

"Ah, my pud-!"

Proud to say, I saved the pudding.

Not my face.

"Tally-hoe!" Sasuke shouted, grabbing my leg and dragging me down the hall.

"No! We're dissecting cat today! Lemme go!"

"You don't even like cats."

"I like Mistress!" I cried, kicking my one available leg at Sasuke.

"Sure you do."

"I don't wanna die!"

I think some of our by standers thought Sasuke was really going to kill me.

"I won't kill you yet."

"You didn't leave room for a dramatic pause after 'you'."

Sasuke dissected a cat in fifth period.

I stared at the instruction packet and plugged my nose fifth period.

The fur was still on the cat...

It looked exactly like a cat...

"What is that, Biology II or Puke Resistance class?"

"I think it was both... You'll have to ask the principal. She's a tough lady though... it's probably Puke Resistance..."

"Ugh... she scares me... Did you do the math homework?"

"...On the back of a paper crane."

"Do you have said paper crane?"

"Nah..."

Ah shit...

Is it clear to you yet that our day was slow and uneventful?

Well, how about we skip to the most exciting part of my school day?

Neji wasn't in Mr. Hatake's class that day. Sasuke was laughing.

"Wonder where my pretty little assistant ran off to," said Mr. Hatake as he wrote on the board.

_Tell me why you're going to the play this afternoon and how long you will stay awake._

"Heck yes!" I said, opening a new file and doing a little dance in my chair.

"'Dear Mr. Hatake, I am going to this stupid play because my best friend is forcing me with whips and chains...'" said Sasuke, using a pen to conduct his speech.

I gasped, horrified. "How dare you say something like that! Aren't you the one always molesting me?"

"'Dear Mr. Hatake, I will stay awake through the entire play so I can molest my cute little friend...'"

"Ack!" I scooted away, "You would do it, too, you porno."

""Dear Mr.-'"

"Porno!"

"Listen, I know you have internet access, Uzumaki, but please, if you really want to jack off hold it it for just a few more minutes, OK?"

The class sniggered.

"Yeah, man," said Sasuke, huddling away from me and glancing at me like I'd just admitted I slept with little boys, "What were you thinking?"

I threw a chunk of eraser at him.

After class, Sasuke and I had to hang around but Mr. Umino came in and was speaking to Mr. Hatake so we sat on the floor and gave each other chalk make overs instead.

It wasn't until Mr. Hatake was about to pull the stupid scarf he wears over his mouth at all times down that he remembered us.

"You two can get out of here," he mumbled as he began pushing his scarf back off.

We strolled casually out of the class room and then ran through the halls acting like Native Americans.

"Oi ee oi ee oh! Oi oh!" Sasuke howled, pounding his chest like Tarzan.

A teacher in passing gave us a funny look.

We stopped messing around when we got out front on the steps.

We were expecting him to be there.

He wasn't there.

I looked at Sasuke. He was smiling.

And it wasn't maniacally or sadistically or evilly or anything.

It was soft and far away.

"Hey..."

I looked up from my skates. I grunted in response.

Sasuke knelt down, his skateboard under his arm and brushed at the chalk on my face.

I blinked.

"Good thing this stuff comes off easily," he mumbled before kissing my cheek.

My eyes grew wide and I shut them quickly as the chalk dust wafted into them.

As I rubbed my eyes Sasuke shouted, "I'll race you to my house!"

I looked up from my fists. He was already gone.

I touched my cheek. The feeling was still there.

I smiled and jetted down the street after him.

As I got closer I heard him singing "A Little Piece of Heaven".

"_I can keep you lookin' young and reserved forever with a fountain to spray on your youth whenever! 'Cause I really always knew that my little crime would be cold that's why I got a heater for your thighs!_"

He stopped at a busy street and swung around the street sign/stop light/pedestrian signal pole and sang a long and loud "La!".

Perfect.

I sang the rest of the line.

"_And I know, I know it's not your time, but bye bye!_"

And I totally ran into Sasuke while hugging him and singing at the same time.

Those who ever doubted my multi-tasking skills were dreadfully wrong!

He probably would have fallen over if he hadn't been gripping the pole.

For dear life.

He pointed to the sky in declaration. "_And a word to the wise, when the fire dies you think it's over but it's just begun!_"

He smacked the "Pedestrian Crossing" button on the pole.

I stuck out my tongue and made a farting sound.

"My hips fit you nicely," he said, flipping his skate board into his hand.

"I think it's that I fit your hips nicely."

"That statement is true is well," he said, setting me upright as the little green man glowed across the street. He smacked his board to the asphault and sped across the street.

I jumped over the curb and followed him, slipping under him as he attempted to do a jump.

"What the fuck?" he shouted.

I bladed backward and gave him a face.

Some lady with her little girl hurried across the street, scowling at us.

I waved merrily.

Sasuke made a face and waved back.

I paused for a moment, forgetting, and then remembering and began balding my fastest down the side walk.

Then he passed me up. That jackass.

"_But baby don't cry!_" he sang as he passed me, "_You had my heart._"

And he waved as he swerved away from a fire hydrant.

Did he mean that?

I slowed down.

... This is exactly what he wants!

I sped up and slowed down.

Someone had just gotten into a car accident.

I came to a stop.

Some idiot on a skateboard.

I rolled slowly over to the crowd and glanced at the skateboard.

Ha, Sasuke decorated his skateboard the exact same way.

Someone in the crowd shouted, "Get the fuck off of me, I don't need any help!"

Funny, that idiot sounds like Sasuke...

... "Sasuke!" I shouted, pushing through the crowd of people who growled at me when I made it to the middle.

He looked up at me and his eyes widened. "Ah, shit!" he hopped to his feet, "Where's my board? You're totally going to beat me at this rate!" He started for the crowd who slowly began parting.

"You idiot!" I shouted, following him, "You just got hit by a car!"

With out a word he picked up his board and started down the street again.

"You complete loser!" I screamed following him.

Surprisingly, he was going very fast.

Let me clear things up: We've both been hit by a car at the very least ten times each.

I will admit, I've been hit maybe five to seven more times then Sasuke has.

Half the time I run into the car rather then the other way around. (9)

"Would you slow down, you're going to kill yourself!"

"I'll slow down if you catch me!" he yelled, pushing his foot again the ground and speeding down a hill.

OK, OK, I can play games if that's what you want, you moron...

I reached the hill and jumped.

It wasn't a very long or lasting jump, but it got me caught up and I sped up just a little and stopped in front of Sasuke.

"You suck," I panted.

"That sounds oddly sexual," he said, way too innocently.

"Where did you... get hit?" I said, catching my breath and pushing up the sleeve of his sweater to check his arms.

"It wasn't hard," he said as he rolled his eyes, "Are you going to rape me? In the middle of the street too... I like your taste."

A car honked as it past. Sasuke flipped him off.

"Well where was it?" I growled.

"Stomach."

"OK," I said, turning away and rolling casually down the hill.

He rolled slowly along side me. "You're not going to check it?"

"No."

"Well," he was walking backwards in front of me with his board under his arm, "I'll show you!"

"Pervert!" I shouted, pointing at him, "He's harassing me!"

He lifted up his shirt and I started down the street at high speed once more. "Last one there has to wear a dress to the play and dinner!"

Damn fire hydrant. Popping out of no where.

And that caring, loving, compassionate, sympathetic little Sasuke passed me, saying, "You gonna wear a corset?"

Was he saying I was fat?

I'll kill him.

I untangled my self from the hydrant and then proceeded to untangle my own limbs and hopped to my feet.

We'll skip me stumbling over a crack in the cement and almost running into a stop sign and get right to me getting to Sasuke's house.

I slumped onto Sasuke's porch and kicked off my skates.

"Hey there, handsome."

I refused to turn around.

"You got blood on your plastic wrap!" said Sasuke, pinching the plastic wrap on my head.

I held up my pudding angrily and showed him how I'd spilled most of it and lost the plastic wrap.

"Ugh, I don't want that stuff."

I shoved it at him and passed him into the house.

"I am _not_ wearing a corset," I grumbled, pouting and slumping onto the couch next to Itachi where he was flipping through a magazine of different styles of frames for glasses.

"We have a corset," he said offhandedly.

"I told you you'd go blind if all you ever did was read."

"I knew and I took the risk." He tapped one of the pictures on the page.

Scooting, I peered down at the page. "Those are cool."

"I want them in red..."

Even Itachi has a taste in fashion... how disturbing...

"When are you two getting yourselves out of my house any way?"

Itachi flipped a page and I looked up at Sasuke.

"We wanted to stay for your little dinner."

Sasuke made as if he were shuddering.

"If I have to listen to you and Kisame doing each other one more night I swear I'll move in with Naruto."

I clung to Itachi's arm. "Don't let him do it... I'm scared."

"Go take a Tylenol, Sasuke."

Sasuke grumbled. "It didn't hit me that hard."

It was silent except for the faucet running in the kitchen and Itachi flipping the page of his magazine.

"Hey... Itachi?" I said slowly.

"Hm?"

"How do always know what's going on?"

"How do you mean?"

Cough.

Emotionless.

Cough.

"Like... You knew Sasuke got hit by a car... you knew Sasuke beat the crap out of Neji... you know what I'm going to say half the time..."

"Have you ever read Sherlock Holmes?"

He flipped the page again.

"No."

"Well. I can tell what is happening around me by close observation, and the closer I look the more I know."

He flipped the page again.

I let go of his arm and slid from the couch.

"What happened to me on the way home?"

"You ran into a fire hydrant."

He didn't even look up.

"What color was it?" said loudly.

"Yellow."

Darn. I sulked away, considering changing my shirt as I went.

About an hour later, Sasuke and I were playing Yahtzee! and Sasuke was winning.

Lucky him.

We were playing on which shirt I would have to wear seeing as mine had pudding all over it.

I wanted to wear Sasuke's _American Dad _shirt.

Sasuke wanted me to wear a lacy, see through pink... thing.

I think it was really a lamp shade cover or something...

Once he won Sasuke was sitting on me and trying to force me into the lamp shade cover when the door opened.

"Hey-" Kisame stopped and stared at us.

We stared back and Sasuke seized my sudden lack of resistance to yank the shirt onto me.

Kisame stepped out and shut the door.

"Get me out of this lamp shade cover!" I screeched once Kisame was gone.

"No! No! Keep it on!" Sasuke laughed, pinning my hands to the floor.

We silenced as the door opened again.

Kisame slowly closed his eyes.

Sasuke sat up and hopped off of me.

I propped myself up with my elbows.

Kisame opened his eyes again. "OK, now that I'm sure you aren't about to start anything weird the exact moment I shut this door..."

I pointed at Sasuke.

Sasuke pointed at himself.

"... Anyway... Itachi told me to give this to you," Kisame said to Sasuke, hanging a tuxedo on the top of the door, "And he told me to tell you," he said, turning to me, "that you need to come with me."

I hid behind Sasuke. "I will not wear a corsette!"

Sasuke grabbed me and held me out to Kisame.

Kisame grabbed me by the wrist and pulled me down the hall.

"Someone help! They're going to make me dress up like a girl! I swear I'm a man!"

"A boy, maybe. You don't know what a man is until you've become one."

"I'm scared..."

"As you should be," he said, grinning.

"I'm getting raped!" I shouted, "Someone help me! I'm being raped!"

Kisame shook his head and opened the door to Itachi's room.

"I refuse to let you use me!" I screamed, yanking my wrist from Kisame (with no positive results on my behalf, unfortunately), "Rape! Rape!"

"Naruto, calm down."

Itachi just kissed my cheek...

Isn't he, like, twenty?

I rubbed my cheek and stuck out my tongue.

"Put this on," Itachi held out a dress.

"Nuh uh," I snapped, turning my head away.

"Yes, or we'll have to put you into it."

"No."

"You made the deal yourself. You're the one at fault."

Kisame's right, I'm not a man, because a man would keep his word.

"You won't get away with this!" I declared as Itachi tightened a corset around my torso, "I said I wouldn't wear one of these things."

"Convenient that he wasn't wearing a shirt," said Kisame, holding my hands above my head.

"Ow! Not so tight," I snapped as Itachi tied me up.

"Kisame," said Itachi, tossing something at Kisame, "Get him into those."

"No! Not that! Anything but that!"

After Kisame nearly ripped my bottom half off trying to... get me into... something, I surrendered and they got me into the stupid, dress.

I stared at myself in the mirror.

"I look like a tomboy from the Renaissance."

Itachi placed a large, curly yellow wig on my head.

"I look like a girl from the Renaissance."

"Are you doing his make up?" Kisame asked as he pulled a tie around his own neck.

"No." Itachi spun me around and pushed me lightly out the door.

And the door was slammed in my face.

I slammed right back on it. "I am not a doll! This will not happen again! You hear me?"

No response.

I growled and trudged to Sasuke's room.

Better get it over with.

Strange, strange sounds came from that room.

OK, no, I'll just go home...

"Whooo!"

What in hell was he doing?

I pressed my ear to the door.

"Crank that, whooo!"

... Grah.

I cracked open the door and peeked inside.

Some freak was dancing around in Sasuke's room with nothing on but _The Simpsons_ patterned boxers, a white button up, which was not buttoned, and a pair of gigantic head phones.

Oh, wait, that was Sasuke doing the Soulja Boy.

"_Soulja boy off in this hoe! Watch me crank it! Watch me roll! Watch me crank dat Soulja Boy then Super Man that hoe!_"

He was mid crank when he saw me.

He slowly lifted his hands to his head phones and pulled them away.

"It's not what you think."

I glared at him.

"It was stuck in my head!"

"What is that crap doing on your iPod?" I cried, heartbroken.

"It's Itachi's!"

"Itachi doesn't listen to music," I pointed out.

"Touché."

"Now hand me your iPod."

He did so.

"I will be manipulating this," I said as I searched through my lace and folds for a pocket.

I turned several times until I was able to drop the small contraption into a pocket on my right side.

I advise anyone who meets Sasuke to never turn your back to him.

"Anyway," I began as I tried to turn around. "Guh did I snag on something?"

I turned the other way.

Yeah, snagged on Sasuke's hand.

"They're black," he said, leaning down to get a better look, "Holy shit, these are thongs!"

He started reaching for them.

I smacked him across the face.

"Don't even...! Those are...! Itachi...!"

He laughed as he rubbed his cheek.

"Don't even touch them when I'm not wearing them!" I shouted, pressing my hands to the back of my skirt.

"Yes, ma'am."

"I am a male!" I screamed.

I plopped to the ground in an explosion of fabric and boyish attitude. (10)

Sasuke continued to get dressed. As he tied his shoes he called for me.

"Hey, button this for me, hm?"

"This is why I think your mother really is resting in peace," I grumbled, "Can't even button your own damn shirt."

I started from the bottom.

"Don't forget to tuck it in," I said, fumbling with the second button up.

"Hey, did they do your nails?" Sasuke said as he took one of my hands.

I blushed.

Damn it.

Sorry, but I don't know if it's me or that kid... who... isn't me!

"Ha!" he shoved my hand down his pants.

"Ahhhh!" I cried, yanking at his grip, "Let me go! Ack, is that your-? Ew, Sasuke, stop it!"

Ew.

Ewwwwwww.

"My ball s-"

"Don't say it out loud!" I shrieked, pressing a hand to his mouth, "Let me go! This is infested with Neji related nastiness!"

"Meh," Sasuke said behind my hand as he lifted my other hand out of his pants.

I stumbled back ward and held my hand away from myself.

"Ugh! It smells like Sasuke nastiness!"

"It's covered in Sasuke nastiness," he said, smirking and buttoning his shirt.

"Arrrgh!" I rushed out of the room and into the bathroom.

I think I washed my hand about four times.

When I went back to Sasuke's room he was giving his nails a fresh coat.

I crossed my arms and kept to myself.

"Gonna take a seat?" he asked from his bed, dipping his brush into the black paint.

I stared. He was peaceful...

I'd thought that I'd never see him like that again...

I'd been having so much fun with him all day... I didn't notice how easily he'd been laughing...

Was it a front? Was he hiding his sorrow?

I stepped closer. He didn't lift his head.

How long would it last?

I'd find out sometime.

I kissed his forehead.

"Nah, I'm just gonna wait out front."

I waited out front for about fifteen minutes, waiting for all of them.

Itachi came out in a tux.

Kisame came out in a tux.

Sasuke came out in a tux.

Of course I was going to be the only one in a dress.

"You're the only one who looks like a girl," Kisame explained from the driver's seat on our way to the play.

(Itachi had known before we told him.)

"Itachi looks like a girl."

"He looks like a man with long hair," Kisame corrected.

"Do you wear mascara?" I asked, leaning over the seat in front of me.

Itachi shoved my face back. "Put your seat belt on."

"If I wore a tux I'd look like a boy," I snarled as I buckled up.

"And if the rest of us wore dresses we'd all just look like guys in dresses."

"Keep your eyes on the road," I barked, sinking moodily into my seat.

"Fine, fine," said Kisame, turning back around in his seat.

The car grew silent.

I glanced at Sasuke.

He was staring out the car window.

His hand was on his forehead.

I tilted my head to get a better look.

I smiled.

Because he was smiling.

I reached to the floor of Kisame's car.

My bearings: four rubber bands.

Thank you for being a college student, Kisame.

I scrounged up two more rubber bands from under my butt and stuffed all but one of them in my underwear.

"What in name of Jaws are you doing?" said Kisame incredulously.

"Nothing!" I said, slipping my hand quickly out from my dress skirt.

"Jesus, can't you wait for better times?" he grumbled.

"I was adjusting this stupid thong you put on me!"

Kisame grumbled but said nothing more.

Sasuke was watching me.

I sat on my rubber band.

He mouthed the words, "You sicko."

I nodded solemnly.

He laughed.

Perhaps it wasn't a front.

I shot a rubber band at Sasuke once we were stopped at a stop light.

He pounced on the opportunity.

"Trying to start something, punk? Huh, huh, huh? Bet you are! Lucky you're a girl or you'd be raw meat! Where's your boyfriend now? Huh? I said 'huh?'!"

I pushed his hand off my collar and shoved him away with my foot.

He took my shoe.

"Your breath seriously stinks."

"Your shoe seriously stinks," he said, "but it's very cute. Mary Janes... Great choice."

Tapping his chin, he examined it carefully.

I wiggled my toes.

"White lacy kindergarten socks?" Sasuke said, turning to Itachi, "You have good taste. You sure you don't cross dress?"

"I'm sure."

"Lies!" I exclaimed.

Kisame parked.

"Everyone out!"

I opened the door and stepped out with my unexposed foot but moved not an inch more.

"Ah, at last," said Sasuke, getting down on one knee and pulling my leg out by the ankle, "I believe I've found the person whom will fit into the shoe!"

"Oh!" I squealed in a high pitch tone, "Prince charming, you've found me!"

He slipped on my shoe and held out his arm.

I wrapped my arms around his offering and kicked the car door shut with my foot.

"Lady-like," Kisame warned.

I curtsied.

"Whoa, Uchiha!" a voice shouted.

Itachi and Sasuke mirrored one another as they looked up as if this was the most pointless thing to do in the world.

"Still with the same girl?" Choji laughed as he, Shikamaru, two girls who I knew as Haruno Sakura and Yamanaka Ino and another girl who I'd never met before stepped up to us.

I stuck out my tongue.

"That's the same one," said Choji, nodding and pointing at me, "What's your name?"

Looks like someone learned their lesson.

"Uzumaki... Kushina."

Ha, lookit me, Ma, I didn't forget.

"What're you doing with a guy like this?"

"She just has bad taste," Shikamaru said, biting off a hang nail.

I pressed myself against Sasuke. "Shut up, he's my hubby."

"Are you related to Uzumaki Naruto by any chance?" Sakura asked.

I shrugged. "Cousins."

Kisame patted my head and said, "Well, we've got a play to see. Nice meeting you."

He smiled and the group of them leaned away from his freakish smile, nodded and started towards the auditorium.

"They're dressed awfully casual," I grumbled as Sasuke towed me along to the auditorium behind Itachi and Kisame.

"We're high class," he said smoothly.

"We or you?"

"... Me."

"Ttch, ass hole..."

"Well, you're the wife of a high class man; that makes you somewhat high class."

I grumbled.

We sat in the front row.

There was only room for three.

I recommended we sit in a different row.

Sasuke recommended I sit in his lap.

Three to one.

Sasuke, you're so lucky this dress in cushiony, because I know you're lap is bone and muscle only.

The seat next to me was empty but there was a jacket on the seat and a soda in the cup holder.

Fine, fine...

The curtains opened and the lights dimmed.

I leaned back against Sasuke grumpily.

He squeezed my knee.

I squeezed his hand until he started saying it hurt.

Pleading, more like.

I pouted some more.

The guy next to us finally showed up.

I glanced at him.

Poor guy must have sprained his hand.

"You have those rubber bands?" Sasuke whispered.

"How did you know I had them?" I whispered back.

"I wouldn't let up an opportunity to see your panties."

"Perv."

"Do you have them?"

"Yeah."

"Give 'em here."

"No! I was planning on shooting them at you."

"Give them up for a better cause."

"You're going to do something perverted," I grumbled.

He pointed at the person next to us.

I must have looked really silly with my skirt lifted up and my hand down my panties.

But, hey, why should I let Neji sit next to us like he can get away with it without at least minimal damage?

-----

(9): Reference to my sister who ran into another car while bike riding last week.

(10): Potter Puppet Pals

I'd like to declare that my shower smells like strawberry Jello.

Happy New Year again, everyone.

To start off my New Year, my wifey called me when I had just woken up!

There is no better way to start the New Year then with a call from my Sar-chan.

I think I'll take her to the movies before we have to go back to school...

I love you Sarah! Eee! Fangirling! I started drinking tea just because I know you like it! (And because I'm not allowed to have juice anymore and I swear on all that is righteous that I'll never drink tomato/vegetable juice ever again...)

Speaking of which, all this tea makes me feel like Shigure...


	13. Love Note

**Those Weird Feelings No One Ever Gets**

Well, anyone notice how goofy FFN was acting?

I sat at the computer yelling until it would let me view my own story.

But still! I look to my email and there it is! Your love.

Thank you all so much for reading and supporting this story. I know a lot of the characters are horribly OOC and I make mistakes but you stick with me.

Thank you!

-----

_La, la, you are my friend! Ah, ah, I can't remember the words in Japanese! You are my friend, do do do do do do do!_

What...?

I said I was going to watch the end of this anime episode before we...!

Why are we rolling? Let me get some pants on first, God!

OK, OK, is the mic on? Should I... Should I say that thing, you know, "Testing, testing..."?

Oh, oh! Live? Why live? I thought we always edited it! What? No!

Ack! OK! Um...

Uh... let me... OK. Er... I doubt Neji realized it was...

Stop that, you're making me...!

OK, breath... Ahem...

I doubt Neji realized it was us. Thick headed asshole...

He didn't look over after being hit by the first rubber band either.

Or the second one.

"These smell weird," Sasuke whispered as he picked up another rubber band from my hand.

"Now you know that you're not the only one who as a raunchy smelling... thing."

"On your behalf, I won't provide the word you're looking for."

"That's a first..."

The rubber band snapped as it hit its target.

"Ow," Neji growled, turning around in his seat and rubbing his face.

We laughed.

"You think I sh-"

"Shush!" I growled, "Gaara's up!"

Gaara stepped onto the stage in a long, brown robe holding a basket.

"The grey-eyed morn smiles on the frowning night, chequ'ring the Eastern clouds with streaks of light; and flecked darkness like a drunkard reels from forth day's path and Titan's fiery wheels..."

Was how he started...

And he went on and on and on and on...

And then he took a breath.

And kept going on...

"Good morrow, father," said Kiba casually as he stepped onto the stage.

I let out a nice long breath of relief.

That was ten times worse then Mr. Nara's never ending lectures on pi and infinity.

"What... what language was that?" I hissed.

"Old English," Sasuke whispered back.

"What was he saying?"

"I dunno."

"Yes you do."

"Yeah, I know. Just watch the play."

I fell asleep right after Kiba shouted, "O, let us hence!"

I woke up at the words, "...and her Romeo".

"Wha...what...?" I grumbled as Sasuke pulled me to my feet as he clapped.

"Clap."

"What?"

"OK, take your right hand and smack it into your left hand."

Oh, that thing!

So I clapped.

"Don't tell me they're doing an encore?" I growled as we all sat back down and the cast stepped out on stage, "I don't think I can handle much more of this."

Sasuke pointed.

The cast bowed.

Thank you, Shakespeare, for not making an additional twenty minute encore for this play.

"Encores are only for music," Sasuke said, exasperated as he clapped.

"Well, you never know!"

The lights came back on.

I glanced at the seat beside me.

"Ah!" Neji, screeched, jumping from his seat and starting through the crowd.

"Hmm..." Sasuke mumbled as he stretched out his rubber band.

Bullseye.

Excuse, I mean, bullshit'seye.

Neji clenched a hand over his eye and pushed through the crowd.

They reacted hostilely.

"Did he just...?"

"Yeah," Sasuke said with a bark-like laugh, "Shoved to the ground like shit. Bravo."

I scratched my thigh and looked to the stage...

Oops...

Wait, how do girls itch their thighs if they can't do it while everyone's looking?

Oh wait... do girls not get itchy?

Man, those lucky bastards...

"Hey! Let's go see Gaara!" I said excitedly, grabbing Sasuke's hand and hurrying through crowd.

There was, like, this ginormous crowd at the backstage entry way.

Crap...

"Try getting through using your lady-like charm," said Sasuke.

I snarled. "But I'm not a lady!"

"That doesn't mean you don't have lady-like charm."

I kicked him in the shin and stepped up to the first person at the back of the crowd.

Something good... something clever...

"Tell them that you're on for the next play," Sasuke whispered.

"But there is no next play..."

"They'll buy it with your get up."

"It wasn't my idea!" I wined.

Sasuke shoved me at the first person.

"Guh, um..." I pulled on the sorriest and saddest face I could manage, "Excuse me, um, I have to get ready for the next play..."

"Oh yes, excuse us," said the man, pulling aside what could have been his wife and stepping back.

"Excuse me..."

Well, that worked like a charm...

"Well, that worked like a charm," said Sasuke, pushing through the door.

"Stop saying whatever I'm thinking!"

"Great minds think alike."

"Pssh," I said, flipping my curls, "I don't think like you, you think like me."

"Well, I was thinking first since I was born first, so you must think like me."

"Well, I have the thought before you have the thought."

"No, I have the thought, you have the thought, and then I speak the thought in words."

"... Well... I make a prettier girl!"

"Yes, yes you do."

Ha, me thinking like Sasuke... I never replay pornos in my head... freak...

As we neared the cast there was a sweep of brown clothe.

"Hey, it's Gaara!"

Sasuke scratched is face.

"Yeah, that's him."

I raised an eyebrow at him and looked back to Gaara.

I stumbled backward.

Sasuke caught me under the arms. "Should I carry you?"

"He... he..."

"He is not wearing a shirt."

"Ah!" I covered my eyes.

"That's the good old Hollywood spirit. Play your role and play it like you mean it!"

"Is he wearing a shirt yet?"

"Yes."

I took my hands away.

"Ah, no he's not!" I cried.

"Ah, you fell for it," Sasuke sighed happily.

"Stop that!" I snapped, smacking him blindly, my other hand over my eyes.

"I didn't know you felt that way," Sasuke said, grabbing my wrist.

I peeked down.

"I swear I didn't mean it like that!" I shouted, pulling my wrist from his grasp, "I don't know where that thing's been!"

"You'll willingly sit on my lap but you won't willingly slap my ass?"

"It was an accident!"

"Did you want to touch it again?" he asked, turning around.

Yes, with my foot.

I kicked him and turned back to the cast.

"Yo!" I shouted, rushing up to a fully clothed Gaara, "You did, like, totally awesome!"

"Naruto?" he said in surprise, looking at my costume, "Oh, uh, thank you..."

"Did you have to wear make up?"

"No..."

I furrowed my brow and grabbed the nearest piece of clothing.

"Hm, it won't come off..." I rubbed his cheek with a different part of the fabric, "Weird."

Gaara pushed my hand away. "I don't have any make up on," he said softly.

... Oh!

"Ahaha!" I said sheepishly, tossing the clothing aside... Man that sounds kinky...

Wait, can I do that again? Live? But I just...!

I am not a perv! I'm nothing like Sasuke!

Fine, fine... Jeez...

"Sorry, I thought... uh... that... Never mind! Uh, anyway, you did really great!"

"Oh, I get it, you thought he had make up on because he was blushing..." Sasuke said to himself.

I stepped on his foot.

Gaara nodded in response to my praise.

"Hey, I thought you had a small part but that was really big compared!"

"Yeah... it was pretty hard to learn all the lines..."

"I hear you, I'd never be able to do it!" I said, grinning like an idiot, "I didn't even understand half of what you said."

"Oh... was I too quiet?"

"No! No, I just-!"

"He's just too daft to understand old English," Sasuke muttered.

I stepped on his other foot.

"Ah... I see. Well, Old English is... A lot of people don't understand it..."

"Do you understand it?" I asked.

Just keep talking... He's still blushing, oh jeez... Just keep... talking...

"Yes... But, I... I've read the play before so... I didn't understand it that time... I... needed someone to explain... a little."

... Was he trying to make me feel less stupid?

That's different...

Because I will admit, I am stupid...

Strange...

"Naruto?"

Huh?

"He's overwhelmed by his own stupidity."

I turned around.

"Whoa, whoa, I don't have any more feet!"

I stomped on both of his feet at the same time.

"Uh, I," I started as I turned back to Gaara, "What's this?"

I took the folded piece of paper from his out stretched hand.

"I have to get my stuff; my siblings are waiting for me..."

"Um..." I stared at the paper, "OK..."

He smiled. "I like your outfit."

I forced a smile.

"Now that we're done here..." Sasuke muttered, grabbing my arm and tugging me to curtains.

"Don't you want to take my note from me and make fun of it?"

"Nope," he said bitterly, pushing aside the curtains and pulling me onto the stage.

"But it's from a really cute guy!" I said, waving the note.

"Sure it is," he grumbled, jumping from the stage and walking down the nearly empty isles.

I swung my legs over the side of the stage.

"Didn't you want to see my panties when my skirt flies up once I jump down?" I shouted after him.

Some of people left in the building looked at me oddly.

"Why don't you go show them to Gaara?"

Is that what it was?

Jeez... I don't even think that's allowed if he thought he could just go and date some guy for a couple of weeks as if I wouldn't care...

Are there rules to romantic relationships? That's against the rules, right? This can't be allowed...

Oh yeah! It's called hypocrisy...

"What the hell's up with you?" I snapped, holding up my dress as I caught up with Sasuke.

He shoved his hands in his pockets.

"...Ah!" I smiled slowly.

So that was it...

"You're jealous..."

"Of what?" he growled, shoving open the auditorium door and stepping through it quickly.

"Of Gaara!"

"Of some anti-social guy with too much eye liner?"

"Because he likes me!" I huffed, grabbing the sleeve of Sasuke's jacket, "Right?"

"Why should I care who likes you? It's who doesn't like you that concerns me."

"Well, because you know I like him? Right? Ha, you're such a dork, being jealous of someone over me!"

Apparently, no, he did not know I liked Gaara...

"You what?" he hissed, turning on me and snatching my hand from his sleeve.

"Like... him..."

Sound escaped his mouth but he didn't form any words...

He shoved my hand at me and turned away, storming over to the car, kicking over a trash can on his way.

"What the hell has gotten into you, you bastard?" I shouted, running after him, "You were the one who always said I was obvious!"

"You are obvious," he growled, throwing open the car door, "but I didn't want to hear it with my own ears."

"Well, why the hell not?" I cried, leaning through the car door.

"Up and at 'em," Kisame said as he lifted me off my feet and into the back seat.

I jumped as he slammed the door.

We drove off in a dead silence.

The silence reached its fingers outside of the car.

The whole world seemed to have hushed.

"You two used to fight like that when you first met," Kisame said casually.

"Kisame," Itachi said lightly but harshly.

"Right..."

After a few years we finally made it to the restaurant.

Stepping out of that car was most similar to reaching the surface after diving into the ocean after jumping of a tall, steep cliff.

I panted as if that's exactly what I'd just done.

"Come," Itachi said, grabbing my wrist and pulling me to the front of the restaurant.

Most everyone in the place was dressed as we were. The women all wore large, poofy dresses and the men all wore tuxedos.

The only exception was the waiters, who all wore poofy Renaissance outfits, and some guy in a regular suit.

"Good evening, sir," said the waiter at the front of the restaurant, "How can we serve you this evening?"

"Reservation. Uchiha," said Itachi.

"Ah yes. Follow me."

We followed in a single file line: Itachi, Kisame, Sasuke and me.

No one sat until Kisame pulled out a chair and motioned me to sit.

I flopped into it, Kisame catching the back of the chair as I tipped backwards.

Sasuke sat exactly opposite of me, glaring at everything that wasn't at our table.

"Sasuke," Itachi warned.

Sasuke didn't move an inch.

"What the hell are you doing?" he hissed angrily, tugging at Kisame's hand.

Kisame set Sasuke on the chair next to me and sat in Sasuke's previous seat next to Itachi.

"Stop acting up like a child would," Kisame growled, tucking his napkin into his shirt collar.

Itachi yanked it out and draped it over Kisame's lap. "We're not at Carrows, Kisame."

"Sorry, love..." Kisame muttered as our waiter stepped up to our table.

"Here we are," the waiter said in a snuffy English accent, passing out our menus, "Please take your time. Are you decided on your drinks or did you need time?"

"Coke," Sasuke said simply, not touching his menu.

"How about you, miss?"

I stared at a painting on the wall... What a cute couple... under an umbrella in the rain...

There was a jab in my side and I struck an angry glare at Itachi.

"She's a little deaf," Kisame explained to the waiter, "He wants to know what you would like to drink, sweetie."

Girl... right...

"Uh..." I buried my nose in the menu," Umm..."

Itachi whispered something to Kisame.

"That means she wants a chocolate milk. I'm very sorry, please excuse us," said Kisame.

I clutched my menu.

"Ah, yes, it is not a problem. For the gentlemen?"

"I'll have a water and he will have a glass of your finest Bordeaux," Kisame replied.

The waiter nodded and I wondered absently why he didn't write anything down.

I swung my menu at Itachi's head and he tilted his head and I missed.

"I can order for myself!"

"Your voice is oddly boyish for a female."

"I didn't want chocolate milk!"

"Yes you did."

"Well, what if I hadn't?"

"You did."

"And if I hadn't?"

"Well, you did and that is what matters."

I pouted.

"That works on only one person at this table and he is not involved in this conversation."

Stupid curiosity...

I let up on my attitude as little as I had to.

"Who...?"

Itachi pointed at Kisame.

Kisame stared hard at his menu.

Uck.

I reached for my menu once more.

Itachi snatched it away.

"What the hell?" I hissed, reaching over him for my menu.

"I know what you want."

"No you don't."

"Yes I do."

"What is it, then?" I said, narrowing my eyes.

"You and Sasuke both want spaghetti."

Damn him...

I dared a looked over at Sasuke.

His arms were crossed and he was glaring at his bread plate.

I dared to guess that he wasn't going to touch his menu for the rest of the night.

"I have to go to the bathroom," I muttered, standing and fluffing out my dress.

Nobody even looked at me.

Fine then.

Fine... You suck too, go die...

I swept over to the bathrooms and stepped inside.

Finally. Sweet relief. I took one step and someone grabbed me by the arm.

I looked up at Kisame.

"What?" I growled.

"I think you picked the wrong door."

I glanced at the urinals.

"No! C'mon, let go, I have to take a piss!"(11)

Kisame spun around and stepped back out the door.

"Ass, let go," I whispered.

He opened the door to the ladies room and gave me a light push.

No... No...

Enemy territory! Kisame, come back! Save me! Someone help me!

I pressed myself against the wall.

My reflection stared back at me with wide eyes.

The entire room was mirror.

Fancy... but...

I turned around and looked at my dress.

I was hot stuff...

One of the stalls opened and I tensed.

The woman, wearing a dress similar to mine, hardly glanced at me.

Oh, jeez, what now...?

I glanced around in panic.

Urinals, urinals...

I stepped hesitantly forward and glanced around once more.

Urinals...

I looked at the woman who was fixing herself up in the mirror.

Oh, God, if you actually exist, please send me a sign... please send me a urinal...

I pressed my legs together and wiggled.

Potty dance.

Everybody do the potty dance.

I seriously had to go bad.

Eeeee, urinal!

I stared at the stalls.

Maybe...?

I rushed into the nearest one and shut the door quickly.

I heard the woman outside zip her bag and make a, "Hmmph," sound.

Shut up, bitch, I have to go.

No mirrors in here...

I stared down at my dress.

Guh...

I lifted up my dress as high as it would go and pressed my chin down on the fabric, holding it up and revealing my retarded panties.

OK, now...

I fiddled with the damn strings and lace until I finally dropped that death trap to my feet.

I mulled over the complexity of life as a woman as I went.

Thank you, Mom, for birthing a baby boy.

Thank you, Dad, for raising me as a guy.

I flushed with my foot and held up my dress with my hands.

OK...

I turned around and tried to reach for my panties.

My head hit one wall and my ass hit the other.

Nnn...

I crouched down and hit my head on the toilet paper dispenser.

Thank you, family genes, for making the probability of my being a boy more possible.

With one hand hardly hooking my stupid panties with the tips of my fingers, I unlocked the stall with my other hand and scooted backwards.

So far, so good...

I yanked my panties up and let my dress fall back over my legs.

I turned to walk out of the bathroom.

Well, hello there tall curvy lady.

I smiled sheepishly and wiggled my fingers at her.

She gave me a look and stepped over to a small counter which she began spreading her make up on.

Again, I started for the door when I heard the woman mutter, "Doesn't even wash her hands... Glad she isn't my daughter..."

With an incoherent grumble I shuffled over to the sinks and rinsed off my hands.

Now what...?

I looked around.

Paper towels, right...

I dried my hands hurriedly and rushed out of the bathroom like a dark fairy out of Fairy World.

Kisame gave me a small, merry wave as I trudged back to the table.

"I will kill you," I whispered, sitting back down and crouching to hide my face, "They don't even have urinals in that war zone!"

Itachi sipped his wine and Kisame laughed.

I looked carefully to Sasuke.

He dipped his straw into his coke.

Of course he didn't give a shit.

And if he did he was holding it in.

Itachi and Kisame whispered to one another but other then that we did not speak.

How completely and entirely awkward and annoying.

Sasuke didn't even drink his coke.

He didn't mention that I'd grown another mustache either.

I licked it off myself.

All the fun we could be having...

I imagined what Sasuke was thinking...

Wait, not a porno...

OK, there...

Neji... Gaara... Naruto...

Was he really jealous? Did he really want me?

Perhaps he thought the same thing would happen to me if I went out with Gaara?

Maybe he just didn't like Gaara...

Maybe... he just didn't like me...

That was stupid...

Right?

The waiter came back and I moved my empty glass out of the way.

He set down some colorful pasta in front of Itachi, a plate of something like steak in front of Kisame, and a plate of spaghetti between Sasuke and me.

With a bow he bid us a good meal.

I stared at the plate of spaghetti.

I stared at Sasuke.

He stared at the plate of spaghetti.

Kisame and Itachi ate.

I stared at them.

Kisame swallowed and looked at us funny.

"Something wrong, boys?"

Sasuke and I pointed at the single plate.

"There a bug in it?"

I turned to Itachi.

"If you aren't hungry then don't eat, we'll pay, calm down."

So that's how it was.

I stared at the plate again.

The steam drifted up to my face.

If anything happened like in _Lady and the Tramp_ someone was going to have a fork in their head.

**TBC**

-----

(11): Am I the only one who hates it when guys say that?

Hmm... I'm making one little request... I am arrogant and stingy...

Please review. I promise if everyone that reads this chapter reviews this chapter I won't ever ask again.

And then you're welcome to keep your joy and opinion to your selves.

Other wise... I'll stop writing.

...OK, no, that's a lie. Even if not a soul reviews I'll keep posting.

Anyway, I feel like a dork for asking you guys to review...

So, bye.


	14. Un

**Those Weird Feelings No One Ever Gets**

Thank you all so, so much for your support and reviews and I'm sorry for making such a silly request.

It's just, I see other people with as long a story as mine and I think, "One thousand plus reviews? Why can't I do that?"

Guess I just need to try harder and become even better at writing!

-----

Itachi and Kisame set down their silver wear.

They stared at us.

"You're already skinny; people will think we're starving you if you just stop eating," Kisame pointed out, sipping his water.

"I live alone," I pouted.

"You're not my guardian," Sasuke snarled.

"I know you're... not getting along right now but-"

"Kisame," Itachi interrupted, then turning to the two of us, "You two should respect your elders."

"You're only twenty," I muttered.

"That's five years older then you." Itachi swirled his wine around in his glass. "Eat or Kisame will feed you."

I imagined Kisame feeding the two of us...

Ew, pink apron, why do you haunt me?

I imagined Itachi feeding the two of us...

Oh my gosh, what is up with Uchihas and being so damn hot?

I stabbed my fork into the spaghetti and slurped it up.

Itachi picked up my napkin from the table and reached over.

I turned my head quickly and took the napkin.

"I can do that myself!"

With a quick, heated glance at Itachi, I wiped the napkin across my face and picked up my fork.

Stupid spaghetti, all tasty and still hot...

"No, you can't," Itachi stated simply, pinching my chin between his thumb and fore finger and licking the napkin.

"Ack!" I tried to push his hand away.

He wiped.

He licked.

He wiped again.

"There."

"Ah!" I pressed my hands all over my still-wet face, "E-ew! Itachi and Kisame germs!"

That was so wrong...

Pink apron...

"Uck, I hate you, pink apron!" I groaned, wiping my face with the palms of my hands.

"My name is Itachi."

"... That's what I said."

"You said pink apron," said Kisame, pointing at me with his fork.

"Uh, I stuttered?"

"'Itachi' doesn't even sound like 'pink apron'," he said.

"They're closely connected, OK?"

"I'm sorry, Naruto, but not only am I taken but I think you should try and stay within your age range."

I had always thought of these people as family.

Some family they are...

With a grunt and a blush I shoved away my plate and turned my head.

"Sasuke," Itachi said slowly.

"I'm not hungry," he muttered.

"You may be angry but that doesn't stop you from being hungry."

"Your presence ruined my appetite," Sasuke hissed.

"Sasuke, would you just eat?" Kisame pleaded.

Sasuke said nothing.

"Mmmph!" I cried through a mouthful of spaghetti.

Itachi pulled his fork from my mouth slowly and with a strange glance at him I chewed.

"Mmmmph!" I wailed through a mouthful of Sasuke.

"Now will you eat?" Itachi asked calmly as he forced our faces together.

My eyes were wide as they reflected in the ink puddles of Sasuke's eyes and he shared my surprise.

"Mmm! Mmm nn nnnn mmm mmmph!" Sasuke shouted, trying to pull his head back.

I swallowed my mouthful of spaghetti quickly.

That caused strange tongue movements and I slammed my mouth shut against Sasuke's.

"Mmmm nnn nnn!" I growled, shoving at Sasuke to attempt an escape.

"Not until you either make up, make out, or eat."

Sasuke glared at me.

I was stricken by the sparkling at the corners of his eyes.

I hesitated.

With an unsteady but single movement I reached up and touched his tears.

He smacked my hand away.

I tensed and glared right back.

Itachi stared.

Damn him...

He let go of my head only.

My lips rested softly against Sasuke's.

I leaned away slowly.

Itachi nodded and let go of Sasuke.

Sasuke stood abruptly from his chair and threw the nearest item at Itachi.

Whatever it was, Itachi hardly blinked before tilting his head out of the way.

"Damn you! I don't know what you're thinking but it's retarded and you should start keeping to your own business and out of ours, you little fuck!" Sasuke snarled, pointing at Itachi accusingly.

Itachi looked on as if this were a movie.

I listened.

_Our_ he had said...

It was still ours... was it? OK, OK, that's... good...

A woman stepped up to our table heatedly and slammed down a fork.

"What is this, un?" she barked, pointing down at the fork and getting in Sasuke's face, "Are you trying to start something, un? I'll take you on any time, punk, un!"

Sasuke and I stared on in awe and Sasuke looked a little shaken.

"Uh, no, lady," Sasuke said quickly, stepping away from the woman," I wasn't aiming for you, I was-"

The woman bunched up her dress in her hand and jabbed Sasuke's chest with a polished finger, "Excuses, un? Don't do things you won't take responsibility for, un! You think you're so cool, but you're not un! You need a lesson, un! I'm trying to enjoy myself and you're ruining my night, un!" she jabbed Sasuke several more times here, "You wanna take me on, un? Huh, huh, huh, huh? Un!"

Sasuke mouthed several apologies but no sound came.

"Please," Itachi said dryly, lifting his glass from the table, "You're a little loud... As always."

I looked to Itachi with wide eyes.

"He really didn't mean it, Dei," Kisame said with a faltering smile, "Listen, have a seat, we'll get you a drink."

The woman took her eyes from Sasuke at last and looked to Kisame and Itachi.

"Ah!" she squealed, clapping her hands together, "I thought this idiot here looked familiar, un! He looks just like you, 'tachi, un! He's your brother, un?"

Itachi nodded solemnly.

"Don't act like it's an insult!" Sasuke barked, balling his fists.

"Shut up, punk, un! You're a dork kid any way, un! Don't act cool, un!"

Sasuke made to retort when someone spoke over him.

"Deidara, you're making a fuss over nothing."

I turned, already in shock about the woman who had stepped up and made such an ordeal over a fork, to look at the man who had come up behind the woman.

I recognized the hair color at once, however, the resemblance stopped there and I calmed before I made any sudden assumptions.

But, c'mon, it's not everyday you see someone with hair identical to Gaara's.

"Ah, Master, lookit, lookit who I found, un!" the woman said, grabbing the man's wrist and pointing to Itachi and Kisame.

"I know," the man said.

"Hey, take a seat, hm? We'll get you guys a drink," Kisame said, smiling.

The woman plopped right on down into Sasuke's seat.

"Right, I'll have a margarita, un," the woman called Deidara said, crossing her legs.

I noticed that Sasuke twitched.

"Actually," the man said, lifting Deidara up by the hand and pulling her from the table, "we were just leaving."

"Stop acting like I'm tipsy,un," Deidara snarled, yanking her hand away.

"You're not tipsy, you're drunk," the man said, pulling Deidara to himself and away from our table.

"Where are you guys staying at that would have you around here?" Kisame asked.

"We're staying at the fanciest hotel we can find, un!" Deidara proclaimed, hiccuping.

"We haven't really found a hotel," said the man, gripping Deidara's shoulder.

Deidara giggled wildly.

"Would it bother you entirely," Itachi finally spoke, "if we invited you to stay at our house?"

Sasuke growled.

"We wouldn't want to burden you," said the man, bowing his head.

"We could have an orgy, un!" Deidara cried.

There was silence throughout the entire restaurant.

I snorted.

"Please, it will save you," Itachi said, then sipping his wine.

Deidara cackled.

"'tachi wants to have an orgy too, un!"

"Deidara," the man warned.

Kisame smiled once more. "Why don't you step outside with our cute little friends here and think it over?" As he spoke he motioned to Sasuke and me.

The man hardly glanced at us before nodding.

"Then we'd be pedophiles, un!" Deidara cried aghast.

"Quiet down," the man said to Deidara, walking to the exit.

"I'm not wearing underwear today, un!" Deidara cried, throwing his hands in the air.

They stepped outside.

Sasuke and I turned as one to Kisame and Itachi.

"What in hell are you thinking, inviting that phsyco into my, not your, my house?" Sasuke snarled.

"'Cute littles friends'?" I snapped.

"Just get outside with them," Kisame said, all too obviously exasperated, "We'll be out in a moment."

"But you-!"

Itachi pointed calmly to the door.

A warmth spread through my hand.

I looked down at the grip Sasuke had on my hand as I was drug through the restaurant.

It tingled...

I officially cannot understand real boys.

Because I don't think I count...

But Sasuke might...

And I know I can't even understand his name let alone the rest of him.

As I said, however, that's a big "might" because... I mean, it's Sasuke.

When we stepped outside the man with Gaara's hair color was lighting a cigarette that Deidara was holding.

As soon as she spotted us Deidara waved frantically. "Hello mini-'tachi and friend!"

I waved slightly.

Sasuke did not.

The man looked up from his lighter, stashing it in his pocket, and nodded at us.

Deidara proceeded to wave at the people walking and driving by.

"On his behalf, I'm sorry about Deidara's attitude," said the man as Sasuke pulled me a few steps closer.

His... I ignored it.

Sasuke shook his head. "It doesn't matter. I'm used to it."

I glared at a piece of gum on the concrete. Just because I act goofy one time after drinking tequila...

I mean, all I did was put Sasuke's underwear on my head...

The man shrugged. "Anyway, I'm Sasori."

"Sasuke."

Sasuke jabbed me in the ribs with his elbow.

"Naruto," I hacked.

"Deidara, un!"

Sasori rolled his eyes. "I'm sorry, he's normally more civil."

"He...?" Sasuke started.

Deidara danced the "I'm a Little Teapot" dance, puffing smoke from his cigarette at the "all steamed up" part.

"Yes."

"Could be your brother," Sasuke whispered to me.

He was more then right. Deidara even shared my yellow hair and blue eyes.

It was silent.

A car sped by.

Deidara spun around, her... his dress swirling, and waved merrily at the driver.

Sasori pushed Deidara's hand down and then had to continuously push Deidara's hands from his face.

As we stood I felt a drop of water.

"Raining, pouring, un!" Deidara shouted, throwing his arms in the air.

"We know, Deidara," Sasori said irately.

"Let's strip naked and run around in the streets, un!" Deidara cried to the heavens, turning his back to Sasori, "Undo me, un."

"We are staying fully clothed," said Sasori, slapping Deidara's hands from the ribbon's on his dress.

"And we can sing, un!" Deidara said as he undid Sasori's tie, "_It's raining men, un! Hallelujah, un! It's raining me, un! Amen, un!_"

"Are we watching them or are they watching us?" I inquired as Sasuke slipped from his jacket.

"We're watching blondy over there," he said, "Here."

I looked at his offering.

Jacket.

"What in the world are you doing?" I said, stunned.

"I thought it was obvious," he said, "Handing you my jacket, of course."

"Why in the world would you do that?

"It's raining."

"So put it back on, idiot!"

He dropped it on my head.

Tch.

"Since when are you speaking to me anyway?" I said from under the jacket.

No response.

"...Sasuke?"

No response.

"Ah, no, I didn't mean I didn't want you to speak to me!"

I looked out at him,

He wasn't there.

"Sasuke?" I turned around.

Oh, you goof, what have you done?

I turned the other way.

Leave it to me to lose something like Sasuke.

At last I glimpsed him.

I kicked him in the head.

"What the hell are you doing?" I shouted.

"He's peekin' at your at your panties, un!" Deidara said as he tried to get Sasori's shirt off.

"I was..." he paused. "... sheltering from the rain."

"Like hell you were," I snapped, yanking my dress from off his head.

He stood slowly.

"You have nice legs."

I turned my back on him.

"Stop acting like I'm a girl, damn it!"

"Ha, me to, un!" Deidara said.

I turned around.

Sasuke dropped my skirt.

I scowled and looked to Deidara.

Sasori shoved his skirt from his hands.

"Not on the street, you moron," Sasori hissed.

"Did you see them, Master, un?" Deidara said, tugging on the front of Sasori's shirt, "They're purple, un! Purple panties, un!"

"Good," Sasori said, grabbing Deidara's wrists and holding them down and away from both of them, "Now calm down."

"Master is holding my hands, un!"

"Yes, now quiet down."

"Master has a crush on me,un!"

"This is disturbing," I muttered.

"I think it's cute," Sasuke said, "Wish you'd do that more often. Maybe I should try getting you drunk..."

"I'm never going near alcohol again, thanks to you."

"Bah..."

A hand touched my shoulder and I jumped several thousand feet in the air.

Do I have to explain the action/thriller/suspense/horror thing again?

Didn't think so.

"Have you made up your minds?" Kisame said to Sasori (and Deidara... sort of).

I looked to Itachi, who was just stepping outside the restaurant.

"We wouldn't want to impose..." Sasori said.

"We want to play charades!" Deidara stated firmly.

"It's not a problem," Itachi said.

"Well..." Sasori began, grabbing Deidara's hand from his ears.

"Really."

"Fine," Sasori sighed.

"Very well. Where's your car? You can follow us home."

They talked it out.

I looked at Sasuke.

Sasuke scowled at the clouds.

We were all silent in the car.

When we neared my apartment building Sasuke told Kisame to stop.

I looked at my shoes and got out when Kisame parked.

Sasuke followed.

I gave him a look but he was already shutting the car door and walking over to Sasori's parked car.

"Naruto and I are just getting out here. My house is just down the street. Just follow Itachi."

Sasori nodded and rolled his window up.

Deidara sang along with the radio and we could hear him as they pulled out.

"_I don't want relationship, I just want bang, bang bang, un! I don't want to know your name, I just want bang, bang, bang, un! I don't want to meet your mom, I just want bang bang bang, un!_"

"Weird guy..." I grumbled to Sasuke.

Well, I thought I was grumbling to Sasuke.

He was, apparently, already at the front of the building.

"You just gonna stand there and get soaked?" he called.

I trudged angrily up to the door and into the lobby.

"What is this?" Old Dude growled, "Didn't I say that this boy is not allowed in this lobby? And what is this ridiculous get up? You're getting the carpet wet!"

Sasuke turned around and pointed at Old Dude.

"What the hell is wrong with you? Do you treat all your guests this way? Just because he's a kid doesn't mean he isn't paying to stay here! You should be grateful, Jesus!"

"Don't use the name of the lord in vain!"

"Would you die already?" Sasuke shouted, pulling me into the elevator and scowling as it closed.

I was silent.

He was silent.

The door opened.

Sasuke started out first.

I followed.

Silently.

I opened the door.

Sasuke stepped though.

I shut the door.

His chest was wet and cold and his grip was tight.

I guess I wasn't too surprised that he pulled me into his arms first thing.

I wasn't surprised that he didn't say anything either.

All he did was hold me and shiver in the increasing cold.

I don't know how long he'd lasted on his feet but when that one small sob escaped his knees finally buckled.

We fell to the ground.

At last I wrapped my arms around him in return.

He withered and slumped against me.

At some point his sobs increased and when he silenced I knew he had fallen asleep.

I pulled him away and looked at him.

His face was shining with tears and rain.

He had no hint of sadness on his face.

I guess I missed that when he was actually awake.

I managed to get him into some dry clothes and onto my bed.

Like a parent I tucked him in, kissed his forehead and shut off the light.

I left the door open.

It was hardly even twelve.

I ate whatever I found and got myself out of the heavy dress and dripping wig.

In boxers and a shirt I watched the rain like you watch a television.

There was a scratch at my door.

I stood and went to the kitchen.

When I opened the front door the stupid cat was already walking down the hall.

I fell to my knees and called for him.

"Shishou."

He stopped.

"Shishou."

He turned around and came to me.

I held out a piece of sandwich meat.

He ate it and sniffed my hand.

I petted him.

He rubbed against me and purred.

I pat his head and stood.

He made to follow.

I pat his head once more and shut the door slowly.

I never realized how uncomfortable my couch was until that night when I lied to sleep on it.

When I closed my eyes I found out how confused I really was.

It was so entirely frustrating.

There was no single thought to think but a million shouted out to me.

I cried until my head ached and still I couldn't sleep.

The clock read three.

That's when he came out and sat beside the couch, thinking I was sleeping.

He slept on the floor.

I woke him up and told him to go back to bed.

He took me with him.

I cried.

He knew it too.

I fell asleep once he pulled me to himself.

I woke up around noon the next day.

Sasuke was still asleep.

For breakfast I had some Coco Puffs.

Shishou had a bowl of milk.

I turned on the TV and turned the volume on low.

My message machine blinked at me.

I glanced towards the direction of my room and then played the messages.

"Naruto, this is Itachi. I've called the school. Don't bother going in."

It stopped there.

My heart sped up. School! I'd forgotten it even existed!

My heart slowed down. Itachi. What a life saver.

The rain pounded on the window. It must have rained all night and day...

I sat on the couch until four watching _Blue's Clues_ and _The Backyardigans_.

I swayed to all the songs.

Sasuke stepped out of the room.

Uniqua and Pablo sang.

" Morning..." Sasuke said, sitting down on couch beside me.

"Afternoon," I replied, looking up.

His eyes were red and his face was flushed.

Believe me...

He was still beautiful.

In fact... he was even more beautiful then usual.

"Sleep well?"

"Yeah," he said, leaning against the back of the couch.

"Hungry?"

"Kinda."

"I have your favorite."

He looked to me lazily.

"Do you?"

"Mmhmm."

"...Kay."

"Kay," I turned back to the TV.

"Well?"

I smiled. "Well?"

"You gonna get it?"

"Nah."

With a groan Sasuke stood and an orchestra of silver ware, dishes, doors, cereal, and boxes preformed behind me.

He spilled milk on the couch when he sat down again.

Neither of us cared.

We stayed inside all day.

Not many words were spoken.

Once we had several rounds of thumb wars but even then it went unannounced and without closing.

I lost twice.

Sasuke told me I smelt funny.

He stuck my head out the window.

I said I thought I smelt like wet dog.

He said I smelt good.

Freak.

At some point we watched _A Wonderful Life_.

Afterwards we played _Battleship_.

Once he got one of my ships, he asked me if I'd like him to give me the moon.

I told him I didn't need it.

I didn't tell him that he was already enough.

But he is... just so you know.

I lost in battleship.

We played Go Fish.

I lost.

We played Black Jack.

I lost.

We played strip poker.

I... OK, OK, I lost.

Sasuke was mid-making fun of me when there was a knock.

"Go get it!" I hissed, grabbing a pair of boxers.

"Nuh, uh, uh," Sasuke said, snatching them away, "Remember the deal?"

"Then go answer the door, bastard!"

"Fine, fine. But it _is_ your house..."

I chucked a pillow at him. "Go answer it!"

And answer he did.

"Oh, hello."

I listened intently.

"Hm," Sasuke of course, "What do you want?"

"Uhm... this is Naruto's house?"

Familiar...

"No."

The door slammed.

"Sasuke!" I shouted, "Who the hell...? Why did you do that?"

Sasuke came back in with a sour expression.

"Salesman."

"No it wasn't," I growled.

"Yes, it was."

"No it wasn't!"

"Yes, it was."

"Stop messing around! Why did you say this isn't my house, you 'tard?"

"So that I could see you naked longer?"

I threw another pillow at him.

"You complete and total bastard!"

Sasuke flopped down on the edge of the bed.

"What would he tell you that he couldn't tell you later, anyway? He'll end up just giving you homework and you'll get over it."

"Guh, I hate you," I growled, turning my back on him.

"No, you don't."

"Shut up."

Silence.

"So, who was it exactly?"

"God," Sasuke rolled his eyes, "Gaara."

I scowled.

More silence.

"It was probably about that stupid note anyway..." Sasuke muttered

I blinked.

That note.

I scrambled to my feet and ran into the bathroom where I'd hung my dress to dry.

With a little effort I found the small slip of paper.

"What are you doing?" Sasuke called.

Ignoring him I opened the note.

The hand writing was neat and small.

The paper was wet and torn.

The message was brief...

...but astounding.

**TBC**

-----

Wow, look, it's Dei and Sasori. Strange since they're... y'know.

Yup, tomorrow's my last day of winter break. Ugh, I hate school...

So, anyone have a Gaia? Look for me, I'm Puppzze. PM or comment or add me or something. We can _bond_.

Anyone else having a break down because Naruto isn't updated this week? Just me?

Fork to Itachi's head idea belonging to Jill BioSkop.

Thanks again for all the love. See ya.


	15. Calling Out

**Those Weird Feelings No One Ever Gets**

Hey guys. Hope you aren't too agitated that I've been away so long. Just remember, complaints and anger won't do much good.

Yeah, I changed my name. This is the same Hazy Daze. Sorry if it caused some confusion.

Anything underlined would have been crossed out in the original/be crossed out if I could cross things out.

* * *

As perfect as I had always thought Gaara to be (you know, beautiful and well put together from the inside out) his note writing skills did not reflect his awesomeness.

Most of the note was scribbled out, but I could still read what wasn't meant for my eyes.

_Dear__ Darling Most Precious Mr. Uzumaki Naruto,_

_In my most sincere voice, If you will trust my written word, There are no words to _

_If I could buy a million roses for every moment I think of you_

_Simply put, You make my heart beat faster then it should and my breath catch._

_I love you. I adore you. I wish you were Please let me make you happy._

_Love, Gaara_

I still don't know why he didn't just get a new paper.

I stared hard at the note, willing the ink to wiggle about until it became a message, something to tell me what to do.

There was nothing _to _do without help.

Lie.

There were a million things to do, but for the sake of me, I was to seek help.

Who to choose? Which side to take? Should I love? Maybe I should wait? Maybe I should follow my heart (which was pointless, anyway)?

Help . . .

"Sasuke!"

I staggered to my bedroom.

Sasuke looked up from the book I normally keep beside my bed.

"Naruto . . . ?"

I think he was startled that I was willingly coming to him despite my lack of clothing.

" . . . Sasuke."

"What is it? What?" He was already on his feet and heading towards me.

"Don't!" I snapped, beside myself, "Agh . . . " I turned my back on him.

"You . . . can wear some," he tossed a pair of boxers at me, "boxers."

I slipped them on quickly and finished my dramatic scene.

With all my acting skills (which is mean and untruthful and conniving of me) I stumbled forward two feet, Sasuke staying perfectly still and rigid, and threw myself the remaining two feet.

"Sasuke," I breathed, gripping at his bare shoulders and falling all over him like a giant, wet leaf.

By this time I think he realized nothing was wrong (or at least I made it appear that way, though there was a world of things wrong).

"Hush," he said softly in response to my several fake, though rather convincing, distressed groans, "Shhhh . . . "

I sniffed several times and buried my face into the crook of his neck.

Working like a charm.

Man, what a bitch.

When I'd play-calmed down, Sasuke said, "You gonna tell me what's wrong?"

I sniffed and mumbled, "I need help."

Like hell I did. Anyone who lies to their friend like I did needs a lot of help.

"Was it that note? I knew it, that asshole was just out to hurt you, people do that a lot in this day-and-age, all they want is to see you suffer so they can laugh at your expense and leave you in the dirt with no where to turn but to dig yourself right down to hell where you at least get comforted by knowing what's going to happen to you and that the devil can't trick you anymore then he has since there's no lower then hell and . . . "

He came to a slow stop when he realized I was crying.

I actually wasn't acting anymore either.

"Woah . . . are you-- ?"

I'd lost myself to my sadness.

"Sasuke!" I choked out, "Sasuke, what do I do? Help me! I need you!"

I clung to him like a baby koala to its mama.

That's what I needed . . . My mama. A mama. Any mama.

Sasuke would be my fill-in-mama.

He played the part perfectly. Rocking and hushing and kissing on top of the head.

I'd become so inattentive to the rest of the world that I didn't realize I was no longer on my feet until I opened my eyes to see I was sitting curled up in Sasuke's lap.

My senses rushed back to me like a freight train.

Every place where Sasuke's and my skin met, like his arms around me, my arms around his neck, my legs around his torso, my chest against his chest: Every single spot, every cell seemed to be filling my mind to bursting point.

"I need help . . . " I whispered through my never ending river of tears.

"I will help."

This is where I take my dive off the deep end.

I promise I return shortly to Norm. City, but not until I cause as much damage as possible.

Please buckle-up and prepare for bumps and falls. Keep hands and feet inside the norm at all times. Thank you.

I looked up . . .

(Here it comes . . . Oh, god, someone stop me . . . )

Sasuke looked down . . .

(We're pulling a cliche here, hold on to the safety bar . . . )

He didn't kiss me.

He looked at me with sad but smiling eyes.

I kissed him.

He didn't move.

I worked my lips over his, fitting us perfectly together.

He kind of tasted like a strawberry milkshake and hush puppies.

"Have I ever told you how much I love you?"

Sasuke's words hummed through my head.

At least they did until Sasuke moved his hand to my hips and reeled me in.

Then they rang (loud).

It seemed as if every move he made spoke the words he had said so long ago.

But he didn't move his lips or his face or his head.

I urged him onward, tilting my head to the side.

Take the lead, I thought, I'm not built to be dominant.

Sasuke stayed put.

I leaned myself against him and jerked my head upward, my teeth pressing against my closed lips.

"Move."

Sasuke obeyed by leaning back until he laid against the bed.

Our lips never parted.

I pulled away briefly until diving back into our never advancing kiss.

Again I pulled away and kissed him many times in rapid procession, speaking between each kiss.

"Why . . . won't . . . you . . . kiss . . . me?"

Sasuke spoke smoothly and without pause even as I kissed him.

"I won't accept you unless I know you're in love, not just desperate, even if you make it so tempting."

I leaned away.

"I do love you."

"You need help."

"I need your help!"

"I can't help you by giving you sex, Naruto."

"I don't want sex! I want . . . you to kiss me."

"I can't help you by kissing you, either."

I slid from his lap and under my blanket, hiding my head like he wouldn't know where I'd gone.

"I want you to kiss me," I grumbled like a child.

I was most certainly acting like a bratty child.

It suited me.

"I want to kiss you."

"Then kiss me, foo'!" I barked from under the blanket.

"I'll know when the time is right."

"Get out of my house."

The mattress squeaked.

"Get out! And don't come back unless you have ramen or a kiss for me!"

I heard him dress.

"And take your stupid love too! I don't want any of it!"

I heard him walking away.

"I said _get out_!"

The front door opened.

There was a pause.

Wait . . . stay . . .

Don't leave me.

I need your help.

I want you to . . . to . . .

"**GET OUT!**"

The front door closed softly.

. . . help me.

I didn't go to school for the next two days.

I didn't get any phone calls.

Someone knocked the night of the day I yelled at Sasuke.

Itachi left a note.

_Calm down. Seek help. Stay home._

The Thursday that I finally went to school was a short day.

At least for me, anyway.

I woke up early and made it to school before Sasuke.

I searched through the halls like a drunken man.

I found him.

He looked at me in surprise and even smiled for a split second until he realized something was wrong.

I stepped up to him and he dropped his box of newspaper the moment our lips made contact.

He actually kissed back.

He took the lead.

When he began to pull away I shoved his note back at him.

I looked into his black-rimmed, aqua eyes.

"I need help."

Then I ran home and cried all day.

He said something to me just before he had smiled for the brief moment, but his words didn't filter correctly at the time.

Now I recall.

"There you are."

Is it big? Is it meaningful? Is there a hidden message?

I decided it was nothing.

I was plotting on what shit I was going to do next while I let my tears soak into my pillow when the phone rang.

I picked up.

"Naruto."

I sniffed and wiped my soaking eyes.

"What day is it?" I asked.

"Saturday. Still need help?"

"Nn."

"Come to the Starbucks on your street, I'll treat you."

"I don't need coffee."

"Come."

I hung up.

I got dressed.

The Starbucks was empty aside from the employees.

I grumbled.

"Did a guy with a black ponytail and lines down his face come through here?" I asked the girl at the counter.

"Actually, yes," she said, grabbing a cup of something and a post-it note from under the counter, "He said to give these to you."

A large vanilla latte and a note.

I took them wordlessly and left the shop.

While standing at the corner of my street I gulped my latte and read my note.

_Come to the pet shop on Ocean Blvd, I'll treat you._

Well, the stupid latte woke me up and I was never going to have plans for any Saturday night for the rest of my life.

I went.

"Excuse me, did a guy with a black ponytail and lines down his face come through here?" I asked again, but this time to an elderly woman in the pet shop.

"Yes, he did," she said sweetly (more sweetly then I effin' deserve), reaching under the counter and pulling up a box with holes in the top and sides and a post-it note on top. "Told me to tell you not to open it but to be sure there's a little friend in there for you. Now be careful with that, hon, don't shake it and be sure to keep it up right. Have a good night, sweetie!"

I waved and read the note out in front of the store.

_Come to the nearest Baskin-Robinns, I'll treat you._

This time I took my time. I peeked into the box through the holes and saw nothing but darkness. I looked around the street and saw a Baskin-Robbins at the end of the block.

Then I headed down the street.

I stepped up to the counter of the Baskin-Robbins.

This is when the box moved on its own.

The cashier and I stared.

"Oh, um, how can I help you, sir?"

I looked up. "Oh, right, did I guy with a black ponytail leave a note for me?"

"Yes, he did, actually," the man said, grabbing a cone and scooping in some peanut-butter-chocolate concoction of ice cream.

I took it and the note and said good evening to the man as I left.

_Come to the Queen Mary, I'll treat you._

This was out of hand now. What was Itachi going to give me at the Queen Mary? I don't even think they're open as late as I was up.

I turned to go home.

What if he had something important for me?

I turned back around.

You know what, he'd see me eventually.

I turned home.

What if he was going to help me?

I nearly sprinted down the street.

No. This is foolish.

And I was settled.

Shortly after that I was home.

I stepped into the lobby with my box and notes.

Itachi stood from the couch.

"It's good to know that you aren't so out of shape that you'll go to the Queen Mary at seven o' clock just so I can treat you to something."

I held up the box.

"What is it?" I asked.

"Someone to keep you company."

"Why?"

"You are lonely."

"No I'm not . . . "

Why, yes, I am . . .

That was when it dawned on me: I _was _lonely.

That explained friggin' everything!

"So that's it . . . " I mumbled.

"It most certainly is."

I looked at Itachi sincerely.

No, I didn't kiss him.

I just hugged him.

"What do I do?" I whispered, "What do I do?"

"You feed it everyday and treat it like the most precious thing in the world. Give it a lot of attention and let it inside your heart."

"Not the cat," I said, rolling my eyes.

"I know."

"This is not make-out cliff, you rotten kids!" Old Dude shouted.

I grumbled and slipped away from Itachi.

Itachi stood and stepped up to the counter.

I frowned.

"Ebisu," Itachi said, nodding.

"Well, well! If it's not Uchiha Itachi! How are you?"

Itachi said nothing as Ebisu nearly shook Itachi's hand right off his wrist.

"I wonder if you allow pets in your apartment complex, Ebisu," Itachi said as he pulled his hand towards himself.

"Why, of course we do! You know," said Old . . . Ebisu, leaning forward like he was telling a secret, "We only allow small pets and cats, but we've had several people with dogs, and my co-worker thought they were so cute that she just let 'em stay!"

"I'll believe it," Itachi said without emotion, "Thank you."

He turned away without a response to Ebisu's admiring smile.

Everyone wants to be as cool as Itachi.

True story.

"Come along," Itachi said with a flick of his fingers.

I scrambled to my feet and followed him to the elevator like a baby duck.

Quack . . .

Itachi had the door to my flat open before I even reached for my keys.

"Have you been watching me in my sleep?" I asked uneasily.

"When you were little."

He turned on the lights and shut the front door.

"What about now?" I asked as I followed him into the kitchen.

"Not recently, no," he said as he set a pot of water on the stove.

I allowed him to sit me down at my kitchen table.

"But you still have my keys?"

"Yes."

I fiddled with the tape on my box of anti-loneliness.

Itachi pulled out a pack of ramen and ripped it open with ridiculous Uchiha grace.

Yes, an Uchiha can even use his grace when opening a pack of ramen.

I finally opened the box.

Itachi dropped the ramen in the pot.

A little black, white, and brown ball of fur sat perfectly still in the corner of the box.

I poked it gingerly.

Itachi pulled out a fork.

The ball of fur stirred.

"What is it?"

Itachi looked up.

"A friend."

At last I lifted up my little friend.

That was the moment when I knew what love was.

Two little eyes opened slowly to look at me and several little whiskers twitched.

Then it yawned.

And my heart was stolen.

"H-hi . . ." I said slowly, setting the kitten on the table.

The kitten stretched and yawned again, scraping its little claws against the table.

I lowered my hand to its tiny pink nose.

I gasped.

It had licked me.

"Don't suffocate it," Itachi said as I smothered the mewing little contraption with love and cuddles.

"Oh my god! What the hell is with you? You are so fucking cute!"

The kitten mewed in response.

I rubbed its head.

I squealed.

It had purred.

And it kept purring, all throughout my meal.

And that was the only sound.

I hardly slurped. Itachi remained as quiet as an antique vase on a dusty shelf.

At last, when the kitten was nosing its way through the remains of my dinner, I spoke.

"What do I do?"

Itachi looked directly in my eyes.

"What do you think you should do?"

The kitten settled down in the middle of my empty bowl.

I stroked it with my forefinger.

Itachi folded his hands.

The phone rang.

"I should answer the phone.

"It may be a start."

And answer I did.

"Hello?"

Someone coughed on the other line.

"Yes, is this Uzumaki Naruto?"

I frowned at the unfamiliar voice.

"It is . . . Who's this?"

"This is Sasori, a peer of Itachi. I believe we met once before."

"Oh, yeah . . . Did you want to talk to Itachi?"

"No . . . Well, I suppose I should . . ."

I frowned again and handed the phone to Itachi.

"It's Sasori," I said uncertainly.

"So it is," Itachi said as if he'd been anticipating it.

I sat at the table and watched the kitten sleep.

As I watched, Itachi spoke calmly with Sasori.

I ignored him and named the kitten.

I checked under the hood.

A boy.

Well, now we could better relate.

I decided to name him Minato after Daddy.

"Minato," I said softly, stroking the multi-colored fur, "Minato . . . "

A firm hand yanked me from my seat and out my front door, Minato mewing behind me.

"Where are we going?" I asked once I caught my breath, which had fled me in my shock.

"Itachi," I said exasperatedly, "It's late and . . . I think I might straighten some . . . you know, things out tomorrow, so I need to get to sleep; I can't keep playing your games."

"This is not a game."

By this time we were out in the middle of the street, Itachi pulling me along at a fast pace.

I gave him a look.

"Then where are we going?"

"To the pier."

We were running now.

"What's at the pier?"

"You'll see when we get there."

But I didn't see.

"Wait here," Itachi said, heading down the pier.

I caught my breath and marveled at his lack of fatigue.

I looked around.

It was far too dark to see anything out of the norm, but knowing Itachi, it was probably something small and not easily noticed.

"Don't," I heard Itachi say in a strong and clear voice.

Someone else said something too softly for me to hear.

"What is the point of this?"

Again, the quiet voice spoke.

"If you speak loud enough, he'll hear you," Itachi said.

"Don't play games with me," the other person said, just loud enough for me to hear.

Without thinking, I stepped forward slowly.

I hit my knee against something cold and hard.

"Ow!" I hissed.

"I said to wait," Itachi spoke, very obviously to me.

"Naruto?" the other person said in a shaky voice.

That other person was Sasuke.

"Sasuke?" I yelped.

"Naruto, just wait back there," Itachi said.

"Itachi, what's Sasuke doing here . . . ?"

I took several steps forward.

"Naruto, no!" Sasuke shouted.

"Naruto, just wait," Itachi said.

My eyes filled with tears.

I knew what he was doing there.

I stopped.

"Sasuke," Itachi said, "Come."

I watched as his shadow beckoned Sasuke forward.

"He can't see me," Sasuke said, "He can't."

"He won't," Itachi said smoothly, "Naruto . . . "

I swallowed.

"Go home."

I took a step back.

"Go home."

I heard Sasuke cough twice.

Then he shouted.

"**GO HOME!**"

I stumbled backward.

I couldn't.

I had to stay. I had to.

"Naruto," Itachi said, "Go home. We'll call for you."

I shook my head and I knew he couldn't see it.

So, to show him my answer, I walked slowly forward until I could see Itachi, who had both eyes on me.

Until I could see Deidara, who was holding Sasuke's arms behind his back.

Until I could see Sasuke.

Sasuke, who was drenched and shivering and struggling, with bits of seaweed in his hair.

Sasuke, whose crying eyes mimicked my own.

**TBC**

* * *

Four words: "Not the bugs! Grooooss!"

R.I.P. so-and-so, who I won't name for the sake of others. I shall miss your awesomeness and sexiness.

I got a hair cut, so now I'm super hot. :inserthearthere:

Can someone tell me what a male turkey is called?


	16. Baby Beluga

**Those Weird Feelings No One Ever Gets**

Wow, you guys really need to chill. I can understand that you didn't get was going on at the end of chapter 15.

That's the point, guys. Unless you can figure it out on your own, you're not really supposed to know until this chapter.

Ice cold, guys. Be cool.

* * *

"Don't!"

I don't know who said it.

I don't even know if I was the one who said it or not.

"Don't!"

"Don't!"

"Don't!"

You know, I've heard that word, that _conjunction_, my entire life.

"Don't you lie to your dad, now, Naru. Just tell me what you did."

"Don't touch those cookies, Naruto, they're for later."

"Don't blow bubbles in you milk, now, babe."

"Woah, don't touch that!"

Don't do this, don't do that.

I was a pretty bad kid, so people always told me "don't".

Then, when I got older it was still don't.

"Don't be late for class!"

"Don't disrespect me!"

"Don't look away from me, Naruto. Don't."

Everyone I know has told me "don't".

Sasuke too.

And now I heard it again.

"Don't!" Sasuke shouted.

Tears ran down his face, colliding with the sea water that had settled all over his body.

"Don't. Don't . . . Please, don't . . . "

I looked at him with crying eyes.

I stepped closer.

"Don't!" Sasuke shrieked.

"Don't!"

I fell to my knees directly in front of him.

Sasuke whipped his head away, struggling against Deidara's grip.

"Don't! Naruto, get out of here!"

I touched his cold cheek.

"Don't . . . look at me . . . "

Then everything was dead.

Not one of us moved, not Sasuke, not me, not Deidara, not Itachi.

The night settled and the pier creaked as the waves slammed into the old wooden supports.

The world stopped spinning.

A tear fell from Sasuke's eye to my still fingers.

I moved first.

Then Sasuke.

My hand slid from Sasuke's cheek.

Sasuke turned his head towards me.

"Why?"

I wasn't able to stop the word from coming, so it came.

"Why?"

Sasuke stood, Deidara scrambling to keep a good hold on him.

"Sasuke, why? Why?"

He wouldn't look at me.

"Sasuke! Why? Why?"

Itachi held Sasuke by the wrist and led him down the pier.

"Wait! Sasuke! Why? Why did you do this? Why? Sasuke! Answer me!"

Deidara knelt down beside me where I sat on the wooden planks.

He handed me a handkerchief.

My lower lip lost control of itself in a fit of trembling.

"S-Sasuke! W-w-why?"

I could no longer hear or see Itachi or Sasuke.

"**WHY?**"

The night closed around me.

Deidara stood.

I stared blankly at the handkerchief.

"Your face is wet," it said to me.

I dropped it to the wood.

"Why?" I asked it.

"Why, because you're crying, of course."

I cried even harder.

A hand gripped my shoulder.

"I can give you a ride home if you want, un."

I looked up at Deidara.

"I can bring you home, un."

He held his hand close to my hand.

"Come."

He slipped his hand around my hand and pulled me to my feet.

I followed him silently to his car.

He opened the door for me.

I sat.

He shut my door and got in on the other side.

The radio started playing when he started the car.

"Bring me to Sasuke."

Deidara looked at me.

I didn't see his expression.

"He's sick right now, un."

"I don't care. Bring me to him."

"I'll bring you home, un."

He started down the street.

"Sasuke is home."

Deidara slowed to a near stop.

"I want to go home," I said.

We were silent for a spell.

Deidara turned the car around.

"I'll bring you home.

I buckled my seat belt.

I saw a man on a street corner in a fancy suit.

I saw a man on a bus stop bench under his blankets.

I saw my reflection.

I saw my tears running down my face.

I saw Sasuke's house.

I looked to Deidara.

Deidara was getting out of the car.

I followed suit.

Deidara opened the front door for me.

I stepped inside.

Sasori sat in the living room, alone, doing nothing.

"Sasori," Deidara said softly.

Sasori stood and held Deidara in his arms.

I took a step back and neared the front door.

I didn't want this.

I wanted Sasuke.

Kisame came down the stairs.

I ran to him like a child to its mother.

How I needed someone to hold me.

Kisame laid a hand on my shoulder and patted my back.

"Let's get you home."

"No!"

I clung to his shirt.

"Sasuke's asleep, kiddo. He won't be awake 'til tomorrow."

"I'll sleep here then!" I shouted, clawing at Kisame's shirt as he pulled me away.

"I think it's better you don't, champ. I'm sure Sasuke will call on you once he wakes up. Come on, I'll give you a ride."

"I'm not a little kid!" I barked, yanking my wrist away when Kisame tried to lead me to the door, "I'm staying and you're not stopping me!"

Kisame frowned at me.

"Kiddo, you need some sleep. I'll bring you home and make you some ramen and-"

I turned away and rushed down the hall.

I heard Kisame coming up after me.

I was faster.

"I'm not leaving!" I shouted back at him as I wrenched the door to Sasuke's bedroom open.

I slammed and locked the door behind me.

The door knob rattled and I heard Kisame shout, "Naruto, you have to go home!"

I turned from the door.

Itachi looked at me with weary eyes.

I looked around in panic for Sasuke.

There was no looking far.

With his eyes closed and his head in Itachi's lap, Sasuke slept soundly, no longer wet but for his damp hair.

I looked at Itachi.

He stood carefully and left the room soundlessly.

I heard him tell Kisame not to bother with "it".

They were not behind the door; I could sense it.

Sasuke slept on.

I'd guess that drowning takes a lot out of you.

I knelt beside his bed.

I looked over every one of his features.

The most obvious was a dark bruise the size of the bottom of a mug in the middle of his forehead.

There were great, dark circles under his eyes, and over them were porcelain-white eyelids rimmed with long, thick, dark eyelashes.

His nose was rather thin but tilted up just at the end like a cat's nose, a ring hooked between his nostrils like a bullring, and a barbell at the top, just between his slender, straight eyebrows.

Pink splashed over his usually pale cheeks and his face looked thin and hollow.

I touched his cheek.

He was burning hot.

I nearly panicked.

I pressed my hand to his forehead.

On fire.

I thought about calling for Itachi.

Of course . . .

He probably already knew.

I touched Sasuke's damp and tangles bangs.

Sasuke tensed.

I whipped my hand away.

He stirred and rolled over.

I sighed.

I never remembered falling asleep.

That night I dreamed (12) of someone to hold me.

I dreamed of someone who was there by my side for hours as I cried.

That someone turned into my father.

And I became a little kid again.

And so Dad sang to me.

Just like he would when I was little.

He grinned wide and ruffled my hair and laughed when I called to him.

He set me in his lap and wrapped his arms around me as the sun set, and he sang, softly but clearly.

"_Baby beluga in the deep blue sea. Swim so wild and you swim so free._"

I yawned and leaned against him.

"_Heaven above and sea below and a little gray whale on the go."_

I closed my eyes.

"_Baby beluga. Baby beluga. Is the water warm? Hey, your daddy's home with you so happy."_

And in my dream I fell asleep and when I woke I was several years older and in a strange room.

I stood from the bed and looked around frantically.

"Daddy? Daddy? Daddy, where are you?"

I called and called until my tiny voice was sore and lost in a sea of tears.

I hurried from the room and right into the arms of Itachi.

And he scooped me up as I cried for my father and cried for my home.

And in a slow, hardly audible voice he whispered to me.

"_Way down yonder where the dolphins play, where they dive and splash all day . . . _"

I hiccuped and stopped my sobbing.

"_The waves roll in, the waves roll out, see the water squirting out of your spout._"

I rubbed my eyes with balled fists.

"_Baby beluga. Baby beluga. Sing your little song, sing for all your friends, we like to hear you._"

And I fell asleep in his arms, clinging with all my might onto his jacket.

And when I awoke I was fifteen, lying in the middle of a deserted road.

I stood, aching and confused.

And a hand reached out for me, calling to me.

"Come along, baby beluga, come along."

And then a car ran me down.

I woke with a start like you do when you wake up from a dream in which you're falling.

I gathered my wits and looked around the room.

Sasuke sat, like a recovered patient (which is, I suppose, what he was) up right in bed, hands in his lap, staring out the window.

And singing softly.

"_Baby beluga. Baby beluga. With tomorrow's sun, another day's begun. You'll soon be waking . . ._ "

He turned his eyes on me.

"And look at that," he whispered, "He's awake."

It was so true.

So true.

I was awake.

Awake to a new day.

Awake to a new realization.

I knew what I'd not been able to grasp.

I was lonely, yes.

Terribly lonely.

Deep inside: My insides were lonely.

My heart was lonely.

But . . .

Always, always there was someone there to prop me up.

Always.

Depending always on other people gets you nearly nowhere in life.

But I'm so terribly hurt.

Always I've been lonely.

Ever since I was a baby, growing up without a mother, I was lonely.

And then it was just me, no Daddy, no Mommy, just me.

And I was scooped up at my lowest hour.

And then I was alone again, Itachi having gone off to college.

And there was Sasuke, who was already my friend, and now willing to be my support.

And now, when I'm having growing pains and love sicknesses, I need someone.

I need to grasp someone's hand, struggle and struggle until I can stand on my own.

Then, forever will the two of us, whoever it may be who is by my side, be there to help up the other when they've fallen.

It's just a piece of the love jigsaw.

I looked into Sasuke's eyes and saw nothing but three words there.

_Another day's begun._

"Why?"

Sasuke frowned.

"Why?"

He turned his head away.

I pulled myself from the floor to sit on Sasuke's bed.

"Why?"

I spoke softly and gently like a mother would to her new baby.

Sasuke didn't move.

"Why did you do that?" I asked curiously.

He whispered.

"So I can hear," I said.

Sasuke turned to me.

"Because I realized I could never have you."

I opened my mouth to speak.

He continued.

"But . . . I guess I was wrong."

A million thoughts went through my head, a million things to say.

What if he had drowned?

Was he asking himself that as well?

Why didn't he come speak to me?

What made him think he could never have me?

I inhaled deeply and evened myself out.

"Tell me the story."

He frowned.

"Please."

He sighed.

"It was something at lunch yesterday . . . "

And he folded out a story.

It was something at lunch yesterday.

Gaara had come (once more) to the lunch table in hopes that I would be there.

I wasn't.

But Gaara was missing me so badly; he just had to express it to _someone_.

"Good afternoon," Gaara said, sitting across from Sasuke.

Sasuke looked up from his pizza, which he had cleared of pepperonis.

"What?" Sasuke growled.

"Just thought I'd sit with you," Gaara said in a monotone.

Sasuke turned back to his pizza.

There was a silence.

"How's Naruto?" Gaara asked eventually.

Sasuke shot him a sharp glare.

"I don't know."

This had relieved him, seeing as he had thought Gaara might know something about me that he didn't.

Then again, this made him even sadder.

He didn't know and he didn't know how to find out.

"Hm . . . " Gaara said slowly, "Well . . . I saw him the other day in the morning . . . "

Now Sasuke was paying his full attention.

"He didn't say much but . . . he didn't look too good."

Sasuke pounced.

"What did he look like?"

Gaara frowned.

"Um, he was a little disoriented . . . staggering and . . . crying. The weirdest part was when he kissed me. Not like I mind, but it was kind of strange how after that he said-"

"He needs help," Sasuke said levelly, standing from the table and walking away.

He spent the rest of the day in school, going about his usual business.

That night he didn't sleep.

He locked the door to his bedroom and didn't make any effort to answer when Kisame and Itachi called on him.

The next day he spent the same way he had the night: in his room in the corner facing the wall.

All the while he had thought.

He had thought about how he loved me so dearly, he had thought about how he wished to be loved.

He had thought about how I had kissed him, how it had felt and tasted and lasted hours after I had sent him out.

He had thought about how desperately he had wanted to kiss me back, he had thought about how desperately he wanted my love.

He had thought about how I had kissed Gaara.

He had thought about how little he must mean to me.

Then he thought about how pointless life was altogether if he didn't even have me.

He thought about how he knew we'd never be together like he wanted.

He thought in a rush how he'd never be able to face me again, how he'd never receive my love, how there was no meaning anymore.

He thought, as he climbed out his window, of how Kisame and Itachi were away and how he knew Deidara, who was on the front porch, would never notice anything strange about him just walking from his own house.

He thought then of how he must look exhausted and desperate and depressed and very, so very, suicidal.

He thought of how he was a faster runner then anyone at Deidara's age, so he ran.

And he was chased.

And he was wrong, he was not a faster runner then Deidara.

They were equal.

But Sasuke had the lead by at least a quarter of a mile as Deidara had simply been walking behind for most of the time until he realized it would be best to chase after Sasuke.

And Sasuke reached the pier as the sun was setting.

That's when he made the jump.

Sasuke assumed that Deidara had paused at the railing, looking for a sign of Sasuke in the water.

"But I tell you," Sasuke said as he sat in his bed, "I was so exhausted, there was no way of rethinking my decision and I sunk like a stone. I was in some kind of before-death bliss and all I thought of was you and how happy you would live to be."

When Sasuke woke up he thought he was being reborn into the world already as a something, opening its eyes, figuratively or literally, to the world for the first time.

It was dark and he was wet and cold.

He opened his eyes to a blank, starless sky.

But then he remembered: he remembered his jump and the chase and being in his room.

And he remembered me.

"You're a good diver, un."

Sasuke turned his eyes, which burned with salt water, towards the source of the voice.

Deidara sat not a foot away, dripping wet, ringing out his hair.

Sasuke frowned.

He was alive.

And the moment he realized this he jumped to his feet and headed for the railing once more.

He would not fail.

But Deidara was quicker this time, fully awake and on his gaurd.

He dove at Sasuke's legs and slammed his to the ground.

The impact of Sasuke's head against the ground kept him dizzy for just long enough that Deidara got a firm grip on him that Sasuke couldn't break.

For at least and hour Sasuke struggled against Deidara.

"But, you know, I think only those first few minutes were a real problem for Dei . . . Some time during my last leg of yanking and cursing and wiggling, Deidara pulled out his cellphone and actually made a call. That's a helluva way to ruin a guy's pride."

Then Itachi showed up and Sasuke knew the fight was lost for the day.

But then I was there.

I was there to see him.

That had to count for something.

But he just couldn't have me knowing what he'd done.

He just couldn't have me knowing how low he'd gotten.

He couldn't let me know that he was capable of falling to so many little pieces.

And then I asked him why he'd done such a thing.

But he couldn't say it.

Suddenly he didn't know.

Here I was, looking at him like the most precious thing in the Universe.

And there he was, soaking wet due to his attempt at suicide.

Which was due to his believing I didn't even care for him.

"And that's my story."

I think he was taken off guard.

Because I was smiling.

And then I decided there were only so many things to say at this point.

And I chose the best of them all.

I pressed two fingers gently against the bruise on Sasuke's forehead.

"I love you."

Sasuke pulled my fingers slowly from his bruise and just held on to them.

"I shoulda known," he said.

Then, simultaneously, we glanced at the door.

Locked.

I looked to Sasuke.

He was looking out the window with a smile over his lips.

"When you said, 'don't come back', where did you mean?"

I frowned.

"I dunno . . . I was . . . I wasn't thinking. I was . . . "

We were silent for a moment.

"I guess I meant . . . not to come back to me."

Sasuke smiled and turned to.

"Without . . . ?"

I blushed and scowled.

"Ramen or a kiss," I said as softly and quickly as I could.

Then he was there.

Right in front of me.

"I'm back," he said.

And he finally kissed me.

And I was finally held like I needed to be.

And on that morning the sun shined through the curtains and lit up our bare skin, our naked bodies.

And we touched each other like I'd never known was possible between us.

**TBC**

* * *

(12): I was sure it was supposed to be "dreamt". Isn't that a word? I'm going mad.

Been updating/editing some previous chapters. I'll probably do the first one again since that thing is hell on a stick.

I haven't changed many things aside from grammar, tense, punctuation, spelling, the works. Nat is Ayame now, so he got an update: he's now no longer a goofy boy but a charming woman.

Check it out if you like . . . You won't hurt my feelings if you comment again/for the first time.

With the mention of Sasuke's nose, I'd like to say that my friend Emily and the guy who played Mr. Darcey in the 1995 "Pride and Prejudice" are tied for cutest noses I know.


	17. He is Beautiful

**Those Weird Feelings No One Ever Gets**

Thanks for all the great reviews guys. It's much appreciated (and loved).

Let's get to one-thousand! Fuck yeah!

* * *

Birds sang out in the trees beyond the window.

Sasuke sang with them, molding it into a song.

"I made love with my best friend," he sang, "and he was so beautiful . . . He didn't call for me but he never closed his eyes."

I hadn't closed my eyes.

Sasuke would kiss me, he would lean in close as he pushed into me and I would look into his eyes.

He never closed his eyes.

"His sweat sparkled and ran down his face and he was so beautiful . . . "

A cool breeze swept through the open window and made my bangs, damp from sweating, dance over my forehead.

I pulled Sasuke's blanket around myself and Sasuke was left bare.

With tired eyes, I looked at his exposed body, toned and glistening with a combination of our sweat.

Every cell on him was amazing.

Every breath he took was beautiful.

Every sound he made was a song.

"And now in the morning light his face shines like melting wax and he keeps smiling at me and he is so beautiful . . . "

Every song he sang was a gospel.

He came closer to me, placing his hand on mine.

Every touch he placed on me was a kiss.

"And he's still smiling at me, even when I sing stupid songs to him and he is the most beautiful."

"You're beautiful," I said.

And I kissed him.

And he kissed me back.

And someone slammed on the bedroom door.

We didn't part.

"Sasuke! Itachi told me to check on you, un! Come on, you need some medicine, un! You don't want pneumonia, un! Hello! Wakey wakey!"

Sasuke tilted his head.

I leaned further into his kiss.

"Sasori! Come here, un!"

Sasuke twisted his fingers around mine.

There was a soft knock at the door.

"Sasuke, are you awake? We need to come in."

I slipped my free fingers into Sasuke's empty hand.

The door knob rattled.

Sasuke pulled us both under the covers, even with my hands still in his.

With the sun just barely filtering in, we kissed.

My stomach pressed against Sasuke's and they rolled against each other as we breathed through our noses.

A cup was placed on Sasuke's side table.

"Sasuke," a stranger called from outside of the blankets.

I wrapped my arms around Sasuke's torso like holding on to a pole that you try not to slide down from.

A hand pulled back the blankets and Sasuke never stopped kissing me.

"Take this medicine," Sasori said, pointing to the side table.

Sasuke grunted.

Our lips didn't part.

Sasori dropped the blankets and I could tell he locked the door before he shut it.

Sasuke broke away and smiled at me.

And I laughed, kicking the blankets into a kite that crumpled to the floor.

We had cereal for breakfast.

"Catch," Sasuke said.

I jerked my head to the side and opened my mouth wide.

A small cereal piece fell onto my tongue.

We walked to the pier that afternoon.

Children ran around, chased by their parents, everyone laughing.

Sasuke laughed too.

And he said, "I think I'll always laugh here from now on."

And he turned to me like he was going to kiss me.

And he reached out like he was going to hold my hand.

But he didn't.

So I'm just going to pretend that I imagined it.

I slept in my own bed that night.

Sasuke slept in my own bed too.

And when I woke up he wasn't there.

I decided that I'd already foreseen this.

And I had, but I'd ran water over it and washed it down the drain.

I didn't want to think about it.

Sasuke was in the kitchen playing with Minato.

And he smiled when I came in.

And he said nothing.

And we went to school walking and not speaking.

And we sat on the steps in silence.

That day Sasuke went home early with a cold.

Gaara was happy to see me.

"Naruto!" he said, the loudest I'd ever heard him speak, "Where've you been?"

"Home," I said sheepishly.

And he actually chattered away that day during lunch.

And he really didn't say anything.

I went home early too.

But I ditched.

And I spent the rest of the day with Minato.

And I spent the next day in a daze, doing as everyone told me.

"Naruto, go to school."

"Naruto, get home, school's out."

"Naruto, why don't you come on over here? Sasuke would like to see you."

"Naruto . . . sit," Sasuke said hoarsely.

I sat.

Then I sighed and said, "Did you get a cold?"

Sasuke shook his head.

I frowned.

What else could it be?

"Did you choke on something?"

Sasuke shook his head.

I rose an eyebrow.

"Did you-"

Sasuke went into a coughing fit and shook his head

"Then what is-"

"I have pneumonia," Sasuke said, his voice wheezing and struggling against flem.

Then he told me about how 61 thousand or so people died from pneumonia a few years back.

He said there was always that chance that he died too.

"You're not dying."

He said he might be.

"You're not going to die."

He said he might.

"Sorry," he said.

I stood and left.

And for the next few days I was as I had been that day.

Lost.

Sasuke called on me that Friday.

I answered the door as if someone had said, "Naruto, I know you're asleep, but can you answer that?"

Sasuke bowed his head to me.

My heart raced.

"You're alive."

"I hope you hadn't been thinking I'd been given a death note or something."

I stepped back.

"But are you . . . ?"

"I've been treated. I should be better eventually."

Then, at that moment, I realized I didn't have a reason for ever leaving his side.

We were silent.

My words burned and spoke in harsh, quick voices in the pit of my stomach.

But I stayed silent.

Sasuke shifted and coughed several times.

And kept coughing

He leaned against the wall and coughed until he was just clearing his throat.

I hugged him.

When I began to let go, he left.

He coughed at the elevator.

I watched as he watched me.

Until the two doors closed in front of him.

And down he went.

That night I wasn't so out of it that I could just sit until I fell asleep.

But I couldn't work up the nerve to call anyone.

So I occupied myself by writing the first of anything that wasn't shorthand or assigned to me.

_My Favorite Things:_

_Cats_

_Ramen_

_Skating_

_Music_

_Food_

_Cookies_

_Cartoons_

Minato stepped over my paper at this point and rubbed against my hand.

I stared at him for a moment.

Then I grabbed a black marker and wrote over my entire list in **BIG BOLD LETTERS**.

I wrote only one word.

_**SASUKE**_

And I went to bed.

The next Monday was Valentine's day.

I didn't realize it until I saw I had a message on my phone.

"Hey."

Sasuke's voice startled me.

"Um . . . Just thought I'd let you know I'd be in school today."

There was a long pause and I thought he had finished.

"Uh . . . Oh, and today's Valentine's day."

I frowned for a split second.

"Um . . ."

I started at the phone.

Um what?

"Loves . . . Later."

There was a click.

A click that I turned away from with a smile.

So, things weren't going so bad.

But I was on my guard.

Minato and I had pancakes and milk for breakfast since I had time and then I bid Minato a good day and headed out the front door.

I bumped my head on something.

I looked around quickly.

Then I looked up.

"What in the world . . . " I started.

I blinked.

Balloon?

I untied a taught ribbon from my doorknob and pulled the balloon down.

It was a red heart.

I looked around.

Taped on my door was a homemade Valentine.

On it, taped on like on a ransom note, were the words:

_BEaUTifUL DaZZLinG Love oF mINe_

I fingered the traditional pink lace glued around the edge of the white heart.

As careful as I could, I slipped the Valentine into my bag.

Then I got into the Elevator.

I nearly got squished between the doors when I saw it, I was so shocked.

Spray painted in pink paint on the back wall of the elevator was a message.

_I Made Love With My Best Friend. He Didn't Call For Me, But He Never Closed His Eyes._

I didn't take my eyes off it until I reached the bottom floor and the elevator doors slid closed in front of me.

I backed slowly from the elevator, tingling all over and every time I stepped.

"Morning, sweet thing!" Ms. Carson called, "C'mere so I can give you some chocolates, hon!"

I accepted them as politely as I could.

"Made 'em myself!"

I could tell. They looked extremely Ms. Carson; very decorative, pink, and floral.

"Now go become a doctor!"

I smiled and waved as I left the building.

And there in front of the entrance to my building it was written in pink chalk.

_He Didn't Talk To Me After That And He Didn't Stay With Me When I Was Sick, But He Was Still Beautiful._

I smiled painfully.

Then I made my way to the corner.

And in the middle of the street it was written in yard-tall, foot-wide, pink-chalk letters.

_He Was Sure I Was Going To Leave Him Alone, Alone In This World, But He's Just Too Beautiful._

I ran down the street until I saw it, written in pink sharpie in the corner of a speed-limit sign.

_And Now's My Day To Refind Him Now That I've Refound Myself, And Today's The Day I Tell Him He's Beautiful._

And I ran until I was at the empty school yard.

And it was there, on the steps in pink chalk, starting from the bottom steps to the top.

_He Smiles, Which Makes Him So Beautiful.  
_

_And Today's The Day That  
_

_So Innocently Offered Me  
_

_Reclaim The Love That He's  
_

_And Today's The Day That I_

And up the stairs I went, balloon bobbing on my wrist, bag flopping against my back.

I burst into Mr. Hatake's room.

"Sasuke?" I said, looking around.

Mr. Hatake shook his head.

"No, I'm Mr. Hatake."

"Has Sasuke come through here?"

"Just to write that," he said.

But before he had even finished speaking I had read the message, written in hot pink marker on the white board.

_And I'm Not Sure Of The World And I'm Not Sure What Comes Next, With Us Or With History, But I'm Always Sure That He's Beautiful._

"Where'd he go?" I asked hurriedly.

"Said something about smoothies."

And off I was to the cooking room.

And on a tray on the first desk from the door was a cake, and upon it, written in pink icing in tiny letters was:

_Holding His Hand Is Like Being Kissed More Passionately Than Fire Burns, And I'm Not Sure If He Wants To Hold My Hand, But No Matter What He Ends Up Doing,  
_

I looked to Mr. Teuchi, who nodded gruffly towards a cupcake on his desk.

"For me . . . ?" I asked.

"Yeah,yeah."

I looked down.

It was written in red icing on white frosting.

_He'll Always Do It Beautifully_

My lips twitched and I looked to Mr. Teuchi.

"You lookin' for that friend of yours? He went to the football field."

My eyes widened.

Please tell me it wasn't too bad.

"Thanks!" I said, running from the classroom, cupcake in hand, and jetting to the football field.

And there were a dozen cheerleaders out on the field, getting practice in before school began.

"Um . . . Has anyone seen Uchiha Sasuke pass through here?"

They giggled and started on how cute he was, when one cheerleader, who was actually smart enough to wear a sweater, pointed to the bleachers.

I looked up.

Crafted by lining up pink boxes, it sat on the benches, each letter at least eight feet high.

_And I Love Him More Then Anything, And All I Want Is Him To Be Happy, And All That Makes Him Happy Is Me_

I slowly turned to look at the other set of bleachers.

_And It's So Beautiful._

Several of the girls 'aw'ed.

The rest frowned and scrunched their noses.

And I rushed to the front of the school where Madame Cheerleader-In-A-Sweater had pointed.

I looked around frantically when I arrived.

Not one thing to see that I hadn't already seen.

Then I got the idea.

I squirmed under the bush.

I pulled out his skateboard.

I lifted up the note.

_He Thinks I'm Beautiful, He Thinks We're Beautiful, He Thinks Love Is Beautiful, And He's_

I stood up.

Someone was walking on the steps.

I watched as he disappeared.

And he left me standing there.

With two words spoken.

"So beautiful."

And no matter how magical it all was, I couldn't stand to simply absorb it.

I raced after him.

And when I grabbed him, he was smiling.

And when I kissed him, he was smiling.

And when I slid away, he turned down the hall and kept walking.

"Beautiful," he said.

And I checked my clothes to make sure I wasn't in short-shorts or something.

And he didn't hold my hand and he didn't look at me.

And when I finally spoke all he said was, "You sound like you're singing."

And I smiled despite myself.

And Valentine's day commenced.

Sasuke received twenty guys' share of chocolate.

Kiba gave me a Valentine from Hinata.

"She said she didn't think she could do it herself."

It was one of those cheesy cartoon Valentine's you get in boxes, companied with a box of candy hearts.

It wasn't her fault that there was no Valentine to compare to my first Valentine of the day.

You know, I've a funny past with Valentine's Day.

Every year I would get one Valentine, only one.

What a jip, huh?

Anyways, so I'd get one and scarf it down and Sasuke would get at least thirty.

What a bitch.

But Sasuke can't stand sweets. (13)

"Here, Narusauras" he'd always say, shoving his trash bag of candy at me, "Have it."

"Thanks," I'd say, shaking my head, "It means so much to have second-hand candy."

And that was all it was: second-hand candy, eaten beside Sasuke who munched on Hot Cheetos and Lucas as I stuffed face with chocolate.

And it meant nothing more then recycling and saving food.

So, it was a little surprising when Sasuke shook his head as we headed to lunch when I inquired towards his candy haul.

"No?" I snapped, then trying again to be calm. It was strange to be so put together around Sasuke, but his attitude called for it and so did my feelings.

"Why not?" I said slowly, containing myself, "You aren't going to eat all that candy, even if you try to, and I know you don't want to try."

Sasuke just smiled. He'd been doing that all day, and though it may seem that it would have gotten annoying, it still had its charm and it was starting to get kinda cute.

My lips twitched and I struggled against the words that pressed outward and I, with much hard work, remained silent.

When we reached the lunch table Sasuke dumped his stuff and turned towards the boy's bathroom.

And I was left with Gaara, who had jumped to his feet the moment he saw me.

"Naruto!" he said, a hand over his heart.

If I hadn't been feeling so awkward, I probably would have joked about him having a heart attack.

But the moment I let myself look into his eyes, all was lost.

"Um . . . " I lowered myself carefully onto the bench across from where Gaara stood.

He may have been excited to see me, but he was not one to be easily lost to his feelings, and he could see clearly that there was sometjing awkward and twisted between us.

He sat across from me in silence.

I twisted the string of the balloon between my fingers.

"I see you found it."

I looked up at Gaara.

He smiled softly. "The balloon."

I frowned. "I thought . . . this was from . . . It's from _you_?"

Gaara nodded.

I touched my bag, willing the Valentine to come out.

"And that . . . that heart on my door? Is that . . . ?" I said, heart racing.

Gaara nodded.

"I hope you don't mind." he said, smiling.

Smiling: softly, carefully, genuinely. Smiling.

I pulled a typical-teenage-drama-scene.

I stood quickly, blinded by my indecisiveness and confusion, rushing to the bathroom.

Someone hooked me by the arm but I didn't look back until I found that struggling against their hold was pointless.

"Sasuke!" I gasped, having not expected to see him (which was dumb, since he _had_ gone to the bathroom).

I think he was sticking to his odd little thing of not saying anything unless it was him hitting on me in the most romantic way.

He tilted his head and said nothing.

I frowned so deeply that he frowned at my frown.

Then he let my arm go and walked away and it was quite clear that he wished me not to take a single step.

And I didn't.

And when Sasuke came back with his backpack and garbage bag, he stopped by my side and held out his arm.

I looked at his arm, then to his face, and to his arm, and to his face.

He hardly shifted.

I bit back a sarcastic remark and obliged, wrapping my own arms and hands around his offered arm.

Then he led me away.

And in my eruption of awkward emotion that leaked out due to Gaara's presence, I blushed like a rose all the way through the empty hallways, where Sasuke stopped and, with me on his arm, sat beside Mr. Hatake's door.

And he pulled out a box of chocolate from his backpack and handed it to me.

I smirked.

"Thought you said you weren't going to give any to me," I said, taking the box, "What, chocolate for lunch?"

Sasuke smiled softly. "This Valentines, I'm not giving you second-hand chocolate."

I looked to the box.

The wrapping was silver and white with a white bow.

There was no tag or card.

"But isn't this from someone else?" I asked, looking to Sasuke.

"Yes, from me."

"To me?"

Sasuke nodded.

I frowned. "Let me get this straight: It's a Valentines gift directly from you to me?"

"Yes."

"And no one gave it to you before this?"

"Unless you wish to count the UPS guy."

I frowned again.

Then, slowly, without ripping the paper, I opened the package.

And, beneath the paper was a golden box.

And on the box read several words.

However, I can't recall them as they were all in French.

"Sasuke!" I hacked, nearly dropping the box, "What, did you go to Switzerland for this?"

Sasuke shook his head.

"No, but I did special order them."

I shoved the box back at him.

"You must be mistaken, this must be for Itachi from Kisame, you're just stealing from them because . . . because . . . "

"Naruto, I bought you fine chocolates. Believe it (14)."

"These must have been, like, a hundred dollars!"

Sasuke said nothing, but ended up smiling.

I frowned (again).

And I kept frowning until Sasuke placed a hand on my shoulder.

And my heart beat like it was trying to tunnel its way out of my chest.

And I looked to his hand and set the box in my lap.

Fine, I thought, I'll keep the damn chocolates . . .

As long as you keep your hand there.

But he didn't.

He moved it to the other shoulder as soon as I leaned my head against his shoulder.

And even then he didn't keep his hand there.

He moved it: to my hair and face and waist and thigh and hand and right back up to my shoulder.

There's not much more in this world that I could wish for than such things.

Of course, nothing lasts forever.

Same as that; it came to a very abrupt stop.

Or crash, I'd call it.

For Sasuke and I both jumped to our feet when we saw him.

I'm not sure what he was thinking, but he stopped thinking it when he saw us.

And Neji ran as fast as his feet could take him from us, leaving a very broken and confused Gaara in the middle of the hall for Sasuke and me to look upon.

**TBC**

* * *

(13): I'm not actually sure if this is canon or not. He seems the type and I thought he said once that he disliked sweets, but once he said, "I was planning on buying some sweets, but it's useless now." I can't tell if he was lying (out of embarrassment that Kakashi was actually not late for once) or telling the truth.

(14): HO'SHIT. IT'S BACK.

A friend of mine said, "What happens to the kitten now that Naruto has _Sasuke _to screw?" I think she thought Naruto was screwing the cat. Zoophile . . .


	18. Holding Hands

**Those Weird Feelings No One Ever Gets**

Ho'shit, I'm back.

Been a while. Since I'm here and having many people read this, I have three requests:

One- I would appreciate anyone/everyone reading a newer one-shot of mine called, "Where the Sun Soaks In" (it is SasuNaruSasu). And . . . review.

Two- I would appreciate anyone/everyone reading my newest story (which is only a prologue so far) called, "Beauty" (still SasuNaruSasu) . . . Review.

Three- I would appreciate anyone/everyone taking my pole: I can't figure what you people want until you vote, so please help out!

Yes, and that's it; don't do it just because I say, either, just do it if you want/if you want to make me happier than I already am.

Well, let's see what this chapter ends up like if I write while listening to Billy Joel and Modest Mouse . . .

* * *

A silence sat itself between the three of us like a great, hairy, drooling beast.

It was so large that it bumped into us when it shifted and it swallowed up the lingering echo of Neji's footsteps as if they were crumbs on a plate.

I scratched an imaginary itch on my ankle with the bottom of my sneaker.

The word, "So . . . " danced about my lips and leapt onto the Beast, laughing and plucking hairs off its great head until it snapped its teeth, and the small So disappeared with a tiny shriek.

Suddenly, it came upon me.

I tensed.

I flexed.

I squeezed it in.

I bit my lip.

It came.

Normally, I wouldn't care, but the Silence stared at me in the face and watched my every move.

I ripped one.

Oh, it was just a little "putt" of a sound.

But, lordy, did it smell.

The beast yipped like a puppy and disintegrated with a sour face.

"Oh," Gaara gasped, covering his nose and mouth with a handkerchief he'd been holding.

Poor Sasuke was a little worse off.

"Oh, my god!" Sasuke howled, backing away and fanning the air in front of his face.

If ever the color red existed, it could have been found on my face.

Any other time, any time but that time . . .

"Jesus . . . "

Despite his disgust, Sasuke still had a very strange charm and romantic air about him.

"I didn't mean to," I grumbled. "I tried to hold it in . . . "

"Um . . . I have to go," Gaara mumbled, hurrying away with his handkerchief wiping away his tears.

"He left," I said, ingeniously.

"Did he?" said Sasuke, his usual self leaking out at his seems.

"Shut up. What do you think Neji was up to?"

"Charming the innocent," Sasuke said, attempting his cool front once more, though the effect was lost.

"But with Gaara?"

"Strike them when they're down," he said matter-of-factly, gathering his things and standing by my side.

"Down?" I said, following him towards the end of the hall.

"Yes, down."

"How, now?"

"Brown cow."

"Sasuke!"

"Well, he was obviously saddened by your rejection--"

"I didn't reject him, I was just--!"

"--and Neji took up the oppurtunity to strike once more."

"But I didn't reject him!"

"You never rejected me, either."

I fiddled with the corner of my box of chocolates.

"Where are we going?"

"Well," Sasuke began, taking in a mighty lot of air, like an old man does when he's preparing to tell an old, forgotten tale, "we're going to find Neji, and if we don't find him, then we'll go home."

"But, haven't we skipped enough school for the year?'

Now, for some insight!

If you haven't noticed, this would be a mighty fine time for us to hold hands.

And I really wanted to, really.

If I had had the chance, I would have, you know, done that knuckle-rub, or bumped my hand into his, like girls do in movies.

Or, you know, I guess I could have just held his hand.

And, I suppose I really could have, but I pretended like he was holding his bag on the side that I was on.

Which is . . . not true at all.

But, I mean . . .

Well, he was . . .

"Meh, I'm sick of all this crap. Besides, Kakashi will cover for us."

"He will?"

I stared woefully at his hand, hanging freely at his side.

"Yeah, I told him we had important stuff to do."

I held my box of chocolates to my chest with both hands.

Ignore it, ignore it, do not want to hold his hand.

Not any kind of whim or fantasy of mine.

Nope, not me, no sir.

"Like what?"

His hand swung casually at his side.

"Like college work."

He flexed.

"We don't have any college work."

I should really let you know that, of all the things that attract me, I have one that is a little out of the ordinary . . .

"But Itachi does."

I mean, muscles are really a give or take . . .

"He's in college, so I would guess he would."

And if Sasuke were, like, fat, I wouldn't care . . .

"Yes. So, he wrote off a false note for us like he was some kind of college professor."

But I have this really big thing for, you know, veins.

"Ah . . . "

Like, when they pop out.

"You don't get it."

Yeah, Sasuke knows it, too.

"Ah . . . "

I reached down and hardly hesitated for a moment.

Until he did the flex thing again.

"So, we can just go home."

And again . . .

"Ah . . . "

I really couldn't stand it anymore.

I reached down, staring at the blue line across his hand, and held out two fingers.

Just a poke. Just a little tap.

He moved his hand, and the spell was broken.

But, he did have a back-up.

I made to move my hand away, but he laughed, and it was so . . .

It was so . . .

Well, whatever it was, it made me stop.

I wanted to just drop it, but my Sasuke-sense tingled and I felt his smile.

And then I was feeling his hand in mine and I was lost to him (well, re-lost).

"Yeah, let's go home," I said, in a daze.

He touched his finger-tips to mine.

"And play some video games," he said.

"Video games . . . "

"And I'll win."

" . . . And I'll win."

" . . . And you'll win."

"And I'll win."

For the record, I actually won.

As I did my newest victory dance (since I never had one, since I never win), Sasuke fiddled with his remote, then suddenly looked up at me.

"Oops."

"Shush!" I hissed, "I'm relishing the moment."

"We forgot to find Neji."

I stopped.

And I slumped to the floor.

"Can you never grant me happines?"

"We should go beat him up at his house."

"We should not," I grumbled, turning off the TV and PS2.

"We should go on a date."

When I finally understood, my heart skipped and raced and tumbled.

I leaned back against the TV, but apparently it had moved, because I ended up falling backwards.

"A date?"

"Yes, a date."

"But . . . what . . . ?"

"You know, the little, wrinkled fruits."

"Oh . . . "

"Like where you take the one you love out somewhere special so you can do crap together, you idiot."

"Don't mess around with my brain when you talk about this stuff!"

I flapped my arms like a bird would its wings.

"Well, you've been asked out on a date for the first time. What do you say now?"

"I've been asked out once before, OK, I'm not that lame."

"You've just been asked out by a guy for the first time. What do you say now?"

What do I say?

I was at a loss for words.

Almost sure it began with a 'y', but I was lost in the sound of the hammering of my own heart.

"Mmmm, nnyyuuuuhhh," I said.

"That clears things up nicely."

"I'm thinking!"

"What, there's a chance that you're going to say no?"

"No!"

"What?"

"Yes!"

By now, I was even confusing myself.

"Should I ask you more slowly?"

I pursed my lips.

"Will you . . . go on . . . a date . . . with me?"

"Maybe I should say no, just because you're a douche."

"My treat," said Sasuke, pulling out his wallet and waving it between us.

"Yes, fine, I'll go on a date . . . with you."

My heart crawled up my throat.

"What's with the pause?" Sasuke asked as he pulled his shoes on.

I strapped my shoes on and grabbed my jacket.

And I mumbled.

"Can't hear you," Sasuke sang as he handed me my keys.

"This is my first date. Jesus."

"How cute," he said in the single most annoying tone ever.

"Stuff it; your first date was just the other month, so leave me alone."

"I can't really leave you alone if we're going on a date.

I punched the down button at the elevator with all of my might.

"Fucking a', quit it."

"Moody, are we?"

I was about to use every foul word I knew to repent for the disdainful pink in my cheeks, but he had taken my hand and led me into the elevator.

And I couldn't speak, due to a vital organ gushing out of my mouth.

My heart pounded so hard that it was starting to give me a headache.

"Sheesh, chill, Naruto. We're going on a date, almost like we have before; we're not heading to the alter or anything."

Of course, that only made it worse.

"Alter . . . "

"No, pizza."

"Argh!" I groaned, gripping my hand around my throat, "Can't breath."

Then he stomped on my toe.

"Fuck! What the hell?"

"Can you breath now?"

"Well, yeah . . . " I grumbled, wiggling my toes in my shoes.

That's when I went to itch my nose.

But there was a hand stuck to my hand.

"Aw, Monsieur Naruto, tu embrassez ma main?"

I looked at his porcelain hand around mine.

"I don't speak . . . French."

"Of course, I know that," said Sasuke, pulling my hand back towards his own face.

I frowned.

My heart smiled and giggled.

"Je t'adore."

And he kissed my knuckles as the elevator came to its stop.

"Now, to the pizza joint," Sasuke declared, dragging me to the front doors.

"Sure as hell wish I knew French."

"Bet you do."

"You just do that to be cool, don't you?"

"Would you prefer a different language?"

"English, please."

"Aw, Naruto, you kiss my hand? I adore you."

"You do?"

"Jeez."

The evening air skipped beside us as we walked down the street, waving its cool air at our necks.

But our hands weren't cold.

One of them each, anyway.

Sasuke stayed true to his word and brought me out for pizza.

One half loaded with crap, the other half pepperoni.

And we ate at the most romantic spot . . .

"How do you fit it in your mouth with all that stuff on it?" I asked as I pried my eyes from the ocean to look at Sasuke.

"Like so."

And he stretched open his mouth with his fingers and shoved it in.

"What happened to tradition in pizza?"

"Well, it made it here, and we Californians couldn't decide over pizza or salad, so we added them together."

The sun tiptoed into the sea and left a pink mess for the moon to wipe up.

"Mama mia!" I exclaimed, shouting Italian-sounding-gibberrish at him and waving my slice in his face.

"Ravioli!" Sasuke shouted back, poking me between the eyes.

"Canoli!"

"Fettuccine!"

"Bambino!"

" . . . You have crab grass!"

"Do not!"

"Do to!"

"I don't have any grass!"

I threw a pepperoni at him.

"Eat it!" he said, thrusting a mushroom in my face.

"Argh!" I grabbed his wrist. "There's a fungus among us!"

"It's squeaky."

"So? That doesn't make it much more appetizing."

He prodded my lips with it.

"Fungusss."

"Why would I eat it after you called it that?"

"Because it's coming from my own fingers?"

"No."

"A food is a food, no matter what environment it comes from."

"Russian fungus!"

"Don't stereotype the Russians!"

A seagull landed beside us.

"Give it to him," I grumbled, turning to my slice once more.

"Can seagulls eat mushrooms?"

"Dunno."

The seagull boasted through its stride and flew away.

The waves crashed and called to the sky to come greet them.

We listened to them speak to one another.

I was reaching for another slice when Sasuke grabbed my hand.

"Hm?" I looked up.

He thrust his face at me and jammed his lips to mine like kids do with puzzle pieces that don't match up.

With his hand that wasn't supporting him, he pinched my chin until my lips parted.

I've heard of rough kissing, but this was just weird.

"Sasuke!" I tried, though the result was, "Fermer!"

He forced his tongue past my lips and then, quite abruptly, pulled away.

"Tastes like pepper," he said, picking a piece of pepperoni from his tongue.

"What the crap?" I shouted.

Then I felt it.

In my mouth.

"You fiend!" I barked, sticking out my tongue.

Lo and behold, the evil incarnate fungus sat there tauntingly upon my tongue.

"Well, now that it's there, eat it."

At this point, I didn't know whether to shit or go blind. I guess you could say that having a face-pounding kiss on the roof of a house not belonging to me had kind of gotten me flustered.

"If you don't . . . " Sasuke began, but his "if you don't"s are usually pretty hard-core, so I swallowed the vermin whole.

"Aghh!" I cried, dieing on the spot.

"Don't flatter yourself."

As I slowly lost my life to the demons, I looked to the ocean once more as I picked up the last slice of pepperoni.

"Like this spot?" said Sasuke, flopping onto his stomach with his pizza.

The purple of the sky greyed without the sun beside it.

The waves kissed the shore on its cheeks and eyelids.

An older man carried his cooler off as he left for the day.

"Yeah."

I tossed my crust aside for future-passing seagulls.

Sasuke finished his crust and folded the pizza box in half.

"Come on."

He jumped.

I followed.

After tossing the box, Sasuke grabbed my hand.

"Home?" I said as he led me down the street.

"No way, this date isn't over yet."

When we reached the sand, Sasuke slipped off his shoes and stashed them under someone's porch.

I did the same.

"Cliche," I said as Sasuke pulled me towards the shore.

"A walk on the beach?"

"Yup."

"I know. But we live here, so, why not?"

I wiggled my toes in the wet sand.

"Why not?" I said.

Sasuke smiled.

His hand was soft.

The water was cold on my ankles.

"Let's go," said Sasuke, and I made to turn back to the buildings.

He stripped off his shirt and dropped his pants.

"You're not going to . . . swim?" I said, backing away.

"Of course I am. You too."

"No way! It'll be freezing by now! And it's still winter!"

Of course, I ended in my boxers anyway.

After he wrestled my clothes off of me.

"Let's go!" he shouted, rushing towards the horizon and diving in.

I stepped in slowly.

"Holy mother of God!"

I looked out at Sasuke.

"Fuckin' cold!" he laughed, his voice splintering with the chills.

"Well, see you!" I said, walking away.

I made it threes steps before he grabbed me and pulled me in.

"Oh my god!" I screeched, grasping desperately for the surface. "Oh my god!"

"Cold, huh?" said Sasuke with a shivering voice.

"No shit!" I gasped, standing and dripping wet.

Sasuke made retarded faces at my boxers as they clung to me.

"Quit it," I hissed, shoving him into the water.

"Come on!" he said, tugging me in with him.

"Aaagh!"

Sasuke laughed merrily.

When my body was as used to the water as it would get for the time-being, I listened.

Sasuke's laugh was dieing down slightly as he calmed, but it still rang true.

I listened to his voice, dark, but with the same darkness that a rich hot cocoa would have. Like dark chocolate.

His happiness was stained into his laugh like red wine, and tears and seawater clung to his eyelashes and the corners of his eyes as his happiness exploded.

I bobbed dazedly in the water for a moment before pushing through the water once.

I touched my lips to his as his last laugh faded into sound-less happiness.

I'd never kissed anyone besides my dad before that.

I mean, I guess I'd been kissed before, but I'd never been the kiss_er_.

The cold of the water slunk away from me without notice, and my fingers slid over Sasuke's wet shoulders.

His lips cushioned mine like tiny, blushing pillows of sweet flesh.

I never felt the cold water on his arms when he wrapped them around me.

When he kissed me back, my upper-hand was lost, and the dominant and submissive roles washed into the ocean.

The ocean wrapped its salty arms around us and kissed us with foamy lips.

A threesome I will always recommend.

The sand stuck to our feet when we walked away and our clothes absorbed the water dripping off of us.

We didn't wear shoes on the way back.

"Want some ice cream?" Sasuke asked.

I swung our hands forward and backward with every step.

"There is never a moment I don't want ice cream."

"You'll have to share with me," Sasuke said.

"You're going to have to get one helluva big cone."

"As long as there's no mint."

Sasuke's allergic to mint.

"Darn. But if it'll keep you from dieing."

"Glad you care."

"Tell me about it."

We got a double scoop of cookies 'n cream.

And shared.

At first, we just switched back and forth as we sat on the curb.

Then Sasuke stole a lick while I had it.

Then a war broke loose.

We nearly lost a noble scoop due to that bloody battle.

It ended in a truce after the third time we tongue-bumped and Sasuke leaned over the top of the cone and kissed me.

Then I ate the rest of it and he had no idea.

We decided to stay at my place so I could take care of Minato.

I licked the stick of the ice cream off my fingers.

Sasuke played with the fingers of my other hand and swung our shoes at his side.

We stepped into the lobby of my apartment building.

"Sasuke."

We both looked up.

I dropped my hand from my mouth.

"Neji," Sasuke said solidly.

**TBC**

* * *

Oh yes, and, for those of you on the East Coast (of the US), particularly in PA; I HAVE COME. That's right, folks, I'm moving out east. See you there.

And ho'shit, newest Shippuden closing song: " . . . please kiss me all night." Yes. And so I hear that Kishimoto-sensei approves of SasuNaru/NaruSasu/SasuNaruSasu. Huzzah! We have won! (Don't take my word for it, though.)

Displayed in this chapter is the extent of my knowledge of the Italian language. Wait, are biscottis Italian? Because I know that word too . . .

You know what I've always wanted Sasuke/Naruto to say in this fic? "Bros before hoes." It suits the characters that I've developed for them here.

And, regarding the latest Naruto chapters: Sasuke is still a douche-bag, what's new?


	19. Depth

**Those Weird Feelings No One Ever Gets**

Four AM and I'm deciding to start a new chapter? (I also finished it at 5:20 AM. Jesus.)

* * *

I was folding my clothes at the Laundromat.

The dryers thumped about me and clothes spun in hypnotizing circles.

I'd been sitting on a washing machine, watching my own clothes spin.

And I'd been thinking of Sasuke.

It was just after he broke up with Neji and I'd thought that perhaps this was my chance.

But Sasuke's crying eyes surfaced like packing peanuts in water each time I thought of how to make my move.

He loved Neji.

He had loved him, and wanted to be with him forever.

Just like everyone else does with everyone else.

Something about Neji, something special, had pulled Sasuke in, and he fell in love.

Maybe it was the way he kissed him so straight-forward.

Maybe it was the way he didn't care what anyone else thought.

Maybe it was the way he looked when he smiled for Sasuke.

Whatever the reason, Sasuke had thought of him as something amazing.

And whenever we saw Neji in the classroom, whenever he passed us in the hall, I would look at Sasuke.

And his eyes would bleed and his heart would cry and his love would rip a tiny bit more.

But he never blinked.

And as I dropped my folded clothes into my basket, I wondered if he would ever tell me.

I wondered if he would ever tell him.

Because even Sasuke knew he still loved him.

And as Neji stood from the couch in the lobby, brushing locks of hair from his eyes and looking at Sasuke with his white stare, I understood.

He _did _love Sasuke.

He loved him a lot.

I watched him, his fingers twitching once, his eyes never moving from Sasuke's.

And I could see it, as if it were painted upon his pale skin-canvas.

He'd never loved anyone as much as he had loved Sasuke.

"Hey."

Sasuke glanced out the glass door to the evening sky.

"What are you doing here?"

"Your brother said you'd be here."

I looked to Sasuke.

He glared at the stars.

"Well, I am. What do you want?"

Neji touched his pocket, as if he wished this was over the phone.

_He'd hang up on you_, I thought.

Neji knew this.

"I just wanted to talk."

Sasuke's eyes flitted towards me, and then back to Neji.

"Too bad you're too good to say anything in front of my boyfriend, seeing as, you know, you're too good for everyone."

Neji glared at his feet.

"Guess you were even too good for me, right? So good, you needed two people at once who never knew about eachother. So good, you couldn't even tell us what was going on."

"If I could just talk to you— "

"If only I'd listen."

I touched Sasuke's arm.

He looked to me.

"Sasuke," I said slowly, looking in his sad eyes. "You're too stubborn."

He frowned angrily.

"You have to listen to him," I said, pleading with my fingers, touching his cheek.

Neji shifted.

I swallowed.

"Come up to my apartment, you guys can talk there."

Neji looked at me, an off-guard shock bouncing off of him.

I sat down on the couch beside Sasuke.

Neji scratched his shoulder uncomfortably.

"Do you have an extra— ?"

"You came to talk, not have tea and sitcoms. You have feet," Sasuke stated simply.

"Right . . . "

"Well?"

I shifted to sit half-locust.

"I wanted to . . . I wanted to apologize."

Sasuke leaned against the back of the couch.

Neji frowned deeply.

"I really . . . I mean, I wanted to tell you . . . because I thought you'd understand. But . . . I just didn't want you to leave me, and things were already starting up with Ten Ten, and I knew if I told her that I was already seeing someone, and if she knew it was another guy . . . I didn't want to lose her either . . . "

He stuck his hands in his pockets.

Minato strolled by, carrying one of his toys in his mouth.

"I was going to tell you, I really was, you have to believe me. It was only a few days that we'd been together when you found out."

Sasuke crossed his legs.

"What would you have said?" he asked stiffly.

"I would . . . have told you that I liked someone else . . . too."

Sasuke shot a nasty glare at him.

"Why didn't you tell me right away? Thought I wouldn't understand? Like you know me . . . "

Neji stood up straighter. "I did think you'd understand. You're smart, Sasuke, so smart, but I . . . loved you so much, I didn't know what I'd do if you left me. And really, Ten Ten was; I mean, she's really great. She's independent and strong, and that's amazing to find in people nowadays, but she doesn't need anyone, not a soul. She was more like a friend than anything, and I think she needs someone more independent than me, and— "

"Love is a big thing," Sasuke said, watching Minato romp about the room. "Sharing it with more than one person is OK. People are so possessive; they think they are for only one person, and their one person is for only them. There's more to it than that. We're each our own person, not someone else's; we love who we love, and if it's more than one person, than that's where our wings will spread to, and that's where we'll fly.

"But love is about trust. It's OK if you were with someone else and loved them too. It's not OK that you wouldn't tell me, no matter what reason you had. You weren't trusting me; trusting that I loved you and would understand."

He pulled a butterscotch candy from his pocket.

"We missed out on a lot of fun threesomes because of you."

Neji smiled for less than a split second and looked at me.

"So, there's no chance for me?"

I glanced to each side.

"I don't know," said Sasuke, touching my hand. "We'll see."

I looked him.

I was starting to regret that I'd let Neji into my apartment.

"You wouldn't mind hanging out sometime, would you?"

"Fool me once," he muttered, tapping my fingers like piano keys.

Neji shook his head rapidly. "I wasn't fooling you, Sasuke, I was going to tell you."

" . . . shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me."

"Sasuke, I can promise you, I was going to tell you, I just didn't know how: If you were to have left me . . . "

"You need trust. Trust in me that I will understand and that I love you; trust in yourself that you've found someone you can trust."

I sunk into the couch.

Neji rolled the toe of his shoe over the carpet.

"Can I call you?"

"You have a phone and a voice, I guess you can."

A smile twitched at the corners of Neji's lips.

"Might I call you?" he grumbled.

"I think you might."

Neji glanced at me one last time.

"I'll talk to you then," he said, heading for the door.

I listened, holding my breath, until the door clicked shut.

"Guess it's my turn," Sasuke said, looking at me.

"What?" I muttered, looking at my lap.

"You know . . . yeah, I think you know: I like you a lot."

I pursed my lips.

"It sounds funny saying it, since he was here just a second ago, but, I love you."

I blinked.

"I dunno, I'm sure I love you more than him. You're so important. I can't believe I didn't let you know last year."

"Last year?" I yelped, dropping my feet to the ground.

He smirked.

"Yeah, at the very beginning of the school year."

I touched a spot behind my ear.

"L-last year? Like . . . like when? Like, last August?"

"Like, at the beginning of the last _school_ year, you dope."

"Freshman year?" I blurted.

"Freshman year," he said smoothly.

I stared at him in complete disbelief.

"Well, it was when we didn't have our first period English together, and I kept turning in my seat to look at you, and you weren't there." He grinned.

I frowned deeply, almost humorously.

"And then," he laughed, "I'd see you the next period, and remember how I'd always hug you? Man, it was like I hadn't seen you for ages."

I recalled vaguely.

"It was really weird when I figured it out. I mean, we'd just talked about homosexuality before, but we never did or didn't apply it to ourselves, and then it was, like, bam."

He smacked his hand on the couch cushion.

"I was thinking back and forth all the time. 'Do I like him like that? For real?' But really," he looked at my face, my mouth still slightly open in shock, "it wasn't a question of whether I liked you or not, just a question of whether I was ready to accept that I wasn't completely straight."

He folded his legs half-lotus and turned to face me.

"You know though."

I nodded.

"You've never cared," I said robotic-ly.

He smiled.

"Naruto."

I made a fish face at him.

He rose an eyebrow.

"Yes?" I said, relaxing my face.

"OK, listen up."

I stuck my ear against his mouth.

"Ready."

He pulled my face away.

I smiled.

He smiled.

"I love you," he said.

I smiled.

More.

"I love you," I said.

"Naruto," he said.

I dropped the smile.

"I told Neji I love you."

I looked at him steadily.

"And he knows that I love him."

I bowed my head.

"And he knows that I love you more than him."

We were quiet.

"You still love him," I said at last.

"Yeah, I do."

I laid my head on his shoulder and wrapped my arms around him.

"Just don't let him do anything to you anymore," I growled.

He placed his hands on my back.

"No, no."

I smiled into his skin.

He pressed his lips to my neck.

"Your turn."

I frowned.

"What?"

He shrugged. "What?"

"Are you talking about Gaara?"

"I dunno," he said, wiggling forward until he sat in my lap.

"I like him, but . . . I don't really know him that well."

He pulled cat hair off of my shirt.

"And . . . I like how mellow he is . . . "

He pulled a couch-fuzz off of my sleeve.

"He's really good looking too . . . but that's . . . not really important."

"That reminds me, how about me?"

I gave him a look.

"What?"

"What about me? Am I good looking?"

I rolled my eyes as he brushed cat hair off of my jeans.

"You're so conceited that you need everyone and their mothers to tell you you're pretty."

"I'm so modest that I only need to hear it from you, and then, if you don't say it, it doesn't matter."

I absently plucked a cat hair from his shirt."

"Yeah, yeah, you're hot."

He looked at me.

I looked at the wall.

"Alright, alright, you're good looking."

"That's all?"

"I like your face," I grumbled.

He kissed my cheek.

I smiled.

I love him.

I really do.

I don't think I love Gaara.

I like him a lot.

But I don't love him.

It feels so unfair.

Everything I have is for him. My heart's front door is open to him.

But I guess I can understand that he loves two people at once.

It's just, I'm so selfish: I want him all to myself.

He's his own, so I guess it's pretty stupid.

I almost spent the night at his house that night.

And I spent two hours playing poker with Deidara, Sasori, Kisame, and Itachi.

And Sasuke spent two hours on the phone with Neji.

"Three twos, un!" Deidara said, slamming his hand out to show us.

"Straight," Sasori said, laying out five clubs.

I tossed my hand aside grumpily.

Kisame sighed and put his cards face down.

"Straight flush," Itachi said calmly, displaying his diamonds.

"You cheat, un!" Deidara shouted, pointing accusingly at Itachi.

"I don't," he said.

"You dealt, un! You cheated!"

I handed my cards to Itachi as Deidara stormed off into the kitchen.

"Where's your booze, un?" he roared.

"No booze," Sasori shouted, pushing his cards towards Itachi.

I was just about to make a comment when the doorbell rang.

"I got it," I said, standing up.

"Prob'ly those two," Kisame said to Itachi as I walked away.

I frowned.

Probably Neji.

I gritted my teeth and swung open the door.

Or not.

Two men stood on the doorstep

"Yo, punk," said the shorter of the two.

He had alarmingly silver hair.

"I'm not a punk," I growled, gripping the door.

"Is this Itachi's place?" said the taller one.

As creepy as it may sound, he had thick, black stitches all over his face.

I began to push the door closed.

A hand from behind me swung it back open.

"Come in," said Itachi, stepping aside. "Naruto, this is Hidan," he gestured towards the silver haired man, "and Kakuzu."

"Naruto," I said, stepping away.

"No one asked," Hidan said, snapping his gum.

I snarled.

"Shut up, asshole," Kakuzu grunted, smacking Hidan on the head.

Not happening. I would _not _hang around this Hidan guy.

When I closed Sasuke's bedroom door behind me, he was still on the phone.

"Yeah, I do," he was saying as he glanced at me and made room on his bed. "But I dunno."

I plopped down next to him.

"Do I have to tell you until your ears bleed? I can't love anyone if I can't trust them."

I leaned against the wall.

Sasuke glanced at me again.

"No."

I could hear Neji.

He was shouting.

"Just one chance!" he screamed.

Sasuke frowned angrily.

"Naruto never needed second chances."

I stared at my hands.

"Yeah, yeah, I get it."

He listened.

He seemed unimpressed until he sat up, his eyes wide.

Then the talking on the other line ceased and his eyes lost their compassion.

"Fine. But one thing, one other thing, and that's it. Adieu. Farväl. Adiós."

He waited.

"Alright, but not alone. I'll see you then."

He hung up and flopped his head face-down into my lap.

"That was pretty damn long," I said, plucking a hair from his head.

"Guy knows how to talk. What can I say?" he muttered, muffled by my pants.

I set my hand on his head.

"What'd he say?"

"Just going on about how he's never been with anyone like me and didn't know what to do to keep me, and saying stuff about how everything was real and that he didn't lie about anything else and that . . . "

I waited, running my hand through his hair along his scalp.

" . . . that he wants to learn how to trust and be trusted and stuff. He said he doesn't care if I date him or if I love him, he just wants my help."

"You gonna help him?"

"Yeah. I mean, he asked, so that means he wants to do something about it. So, yeah."

I made to speak, but he sat up suddenly, just inches from my face.

"I suddenly feel like making out with you."

My "just-friends" instinct kicked in and my cheeks prickled and warmed.

"What?" I yelped, leaning away.

"See, I was thinking about how I told you earlier that I realized I loved you back at the beginning of freshman year, and all that time I wanted to just-- " he punched he fist into his open palm, "--all the fuckin' time. Like, really wanted to just tell you and, like, jump you or something."

"Yeah?" I said, freaking out internally.

"So, I've been waiting a year to suck your face off, and now I can do it without getting socked in the stomach."

His eyes glowed with unleashed excitement.

"If I say I don't want to, you're going to molest me, aren't you?"

"'Course."

I had hardly begun to pronounce the 'f' in _fine_ when he slammed his face to mine, gripping my hair and pressing his warm tongue against my lips.

I attempted a yelp, but he swallowed it up.

I'll be the first to admit, Sasuke knows how to kiss.

Once he got all his energy out of his system (after a solid five minutes of trying to breath out of my nose) his hands slipped from my hair and relaxed around the back of my neck.

I pulled away and breathed.

But not for long, obviously.

He wrapped his arms around me and leaned back onto the bed, pulling me down with him.

"You're really sexy when you're lacking oxygen," he said, leaning up to kiss me again.

"Wait," I panted, cupping a hand over his mouth.

He waited.

"I have . . . a question."

"Hmm?"

I looked him straight in the eye.

"Why didn't you tell me you loved me earlier?"

Sasuke touched my wrist slowly and I moved my hand.

I regretted my question at once.

I already knew why.

But why did I have to ask?

To hear him say it?

To see him make the connection?

He frowned, realizing my trap.

"Because . . . " he stared at my forehead, "I didn't want you to . . . say no."

I looked at his eyes.

He looked at my nose.

"I know: . . . Love makes all sacrifices. But . . . I mean, there are a million things you could have thought besides loving me back or accepting it."

Suddenly, a smile overcame me.

I kissed his forehead.

Whatever.

Just whatever.

"That's more of a sacrifice," I said. "Love does make sacrifices, and telling someone you love them, even when you know they may walk away, is one of them, but not telling them and having to keep your love to yourself, smiling when you aren't happy . . . "

I pressed my lips to his cheek.

"Be happy, now."

His eyes became glassy.

"I love him," he said, his voice jolting at the end of his sentence.

"I know."

"I don't . . . I don't like it."

He wrapped his arms around my neck.

I frowned for him and placed a hand on his back.

"I'm so glad I love you, too," he said, a laugh in his crying voice. "You're so easy to love. It's easy to love you when you love me too."

I pressed him against me.

"I do love you."

"I'm sure," he said in a moth's-wings voice.

I do love him.

If he didn't love me, I'd say I love him too much.

There's this big bulge in my chest because I love him so much.

What would I do with all of it if he weren't here?

I didn't even know I had all that love packed away in me, sleeping in the soil, waiting for water.

Sasuke was so amazing to Neji that he made him change.

It had to be love.

But Sasuke rained on my soil, shone on my sprouting smiles, until I burst into a flower.

These two loves are so different.

I don't even understand them.

Sasuke sighed and snuggled against me.

I breathed in his scent through his hair.

"If I had to ask one of you to marry me, I want you to know, it would be you."

He smiled into my shirt.

"Really?" I said softly.

"Yes, really," he said. "You're a part of my soul. Neji is a receiver of my affection. Get it?"

I laughed.

"Guess I do."

He pushed the top of his head into my stomach.

"Kay, can we go back to making out?"

I bent down to meet his eyes.

He puckered his lips.

I grinned and kissed him.

A fist slammed on the door.

"Why does this always happen to us?" I grumbled.

Sasuke shrugged.

"Yo, punks, get the fuck out!"

"Your brother has loud friends."

"I heard that, you shit-head!"

The door flew open.

Itachi, Kakuzu, Hidan, and Deidara stood in the doorway, Hidan looking ready to pounce.

"What?" Sasuke grumbled, turning his head, so close to me that his hair touched my cheek.

"Use condoms and lubricant, un!" Deidara said, giving us the thumbs up and walking off.

"We're sleeping on their fuck platform?" Hidan growled, crossing his arms. "Fuckin' sick, dude."

"Hidan and Kakuzu will be sleeping in your room, Sasuke," said Itachi. "You can either sleep on the couch or on the floor somewhere, or I can give you a ride back to Naruto's."

"You're kicking me out of my own room?" Sasuke hissed, glaring death at the three of them.

"Think of it this way," Itachi said, sighing, "Naruto has a smaller bed and no parents around."

"Takes out the excitement of getting caught," Sasuke said simply.

"You can be as loud as you want."

"Same."

"You can do it in every room of the house."

"Not as many rooms and same."

"You don't have to listen to anyone else do each other."

Sasuke stood and swept from the room.

I started putting my shoes on.

"Out, fuckin' punk," Hidan grunted, dropping his bag on Sasuke's bed.

"Shut the fuck up," I snapped, standing up.

"What the fuck did you say, bitch?"

I gave him the evil eye and followed after Sasuke.

Itachi grabbed my arm.

"Naruto."

I looked at him.

"Yeah?" I said, guiltily.

He smiled the biggest smile I'd ever seen him smile (ever).

"I must say, I'm much happier to walk in on you and Sasuke, rather than Neji and Sasuke."

I grinned.

"It's much nicer being walked in on than walking in on; gotta say."

He leaned down and kissed the top of my head.

"It's all you from here on out. You'll do fine."

I walked off smiling.

Sasuke was waiting on the porch.

"Ready to go fuck?"

I rolled my eyes.

"Not with that line, I'm not."

"Hey, baby," he said, snaking an arm around my waist, "I'll be the outlet to your plug."

"Not with that, either."

"You're the Libra to my Leo."

"Yeah, I know."

He rolled his eyes.

"Don't you _get it_?"

We were walking down the street at this point.

"Dazzle me."

"You're the next most compatible element to mine after Sagittarius and Aries!"

"Yippee."

"It was _meant to be_."

I smiled at the stars.

Sasuke puffed out his cheeks and rested his head on my shoulder.

"I'm going to meet Neji at my place tomorrow."

I glanced at him.

"Will you come?"

"Sure."

A cloud moved towards the stars.

"I kind of feel like being around you all the time nowadays. Weird."

I watched as the stars peaked out behind the cloud.

They winked at me, waving their handkerchiefs and blowing gaseous kisses.

"Good thing I like you, or that would suck."

**TBC**

* * *

_Love Me Like You_ by The Magic Numbers kind of reminds me of Sasuke's situation in this thing. So does _I Don't Believe You_ by The Magnetic Field.

Yeah, yeah, Neji's back. I realized that Sasuke and Neji's relationship had never gotten any depth, and now that Naruto is an even bigger part of Sasuke's life, he'll get more insight and begin to care (I _do_ actually think this stuff through, sometimes). So, whatever, don't complain, blah blah, Sasuke's a complicated guy, he must have felt a lot for Neji to love him in the first place.

Besides, I really do love Neji. (My second favorite pairing with Naruto in it is with Neji.) Sasuke and I want to give him a second chance to be a _good _bitch, not a bitch bitch. (Which _is _canon. You guys always say, "Awww, you made Neji a bitch," and even if I over did it, he is pretty conceited; or was. I mean, back in the chuunin exams, he was a bitch bitch. But I love him.)

Don't complain, there's no use. I made up for it with Hidan and Kakuzu and a bunch of SasuNaruSasu (longoverduejeez), anyway, right?

Ironically, in Western Astrology, Naruto's element is air and Sasuke's is fire. I wonder if that was planned. (I'm earth element, by the way. I'm compatible with Shino . . . What the crap? I'm not really into that stuff, though.)

Harhar, this closing was long. But it had to be to prevent you anti-this-fanfiction-Neji people from ripping out my throat. Just listen to some Bob Marley and chillax.


	20. Crack

**Those Weird Feelings No One Ever Gets**

Hello, guys. I'd like to say before I start up that this is not a chapter update.

I'm stuck on "Those Weird Feelings", though I still have ideas for it, so here it is: A crack chapter.

Hm.

* * *

"You."

Sasuke looked up from his dinner plate.

Four pairs of eyes-- one calm, one indifferent, one shocked, and one rather full of mirth-- stared at his from all around the table.

Sasuke grunted at Kisame in a reply, going back to his corn(PORN).

"You can tell us, you know," Kisame said, leaning across the table with a rather surprised frown.

"OK," Sasuke said, popping one of the kernels on his cob with his fork.

There was a hush of expectation.

Deidara, apparently, could not stand the wait.

"We know you're a dirty pervert-boy, un!" he shouted, standing from his chair. "There, I said it, un!"

"He's not a pervert, Deidara," Sasori said, shaking his head.

"Is so," Deidara muttered, taking a seat once more and reaching his fork for Sasori's glazed carrots.

Itachi shook his head. "Just because he had sex doesn't mean Sasuke's a pervert."

Kisame nodded in eager agreement. "He's just . . . not a virgin!"

Sasuke chucked an ice cube at Kisame. "Shut up."

"Well, it's perfectly OK!" Kisame said, catching the ice cube, "I mean . . . "

"No it's not, un!" Deidara bit out, "Not being a virgin is dirty and- and- and . . . perverted!"

"Deidara."

Deidara turned swiftly to Sasori, his hair bouncing on his shoulders as he did so.

"Deidara, you're not a virgin."

"So?"

"So, you're a hypocrite."

"I never said I wasn't perverted, un!"

Itachi sighed. "Enough, Deidara. Sasuke may do whatever he pleases, and that includes having sex."

Sasuke buried himself unpleasantly in his dining.

"Get a chastity belt on this boy, un!" Deidara pointed his fork at Sasuke. "And everytime he gets hard . . . his dick shall be stabbed with spikes, un!"

"Deidara . . . " Sasori and Kisame said together.

"To prove my point, I won't have sex for the next year, starting now, un!"

Sasori sighed. "Deidara, how about a round of naked mattress wrestling tonight?"

"OK!"

"You are so ditsy," Sasuke grumbled, pushing his empty plate away.

"Your mom, un!" Deidara growled.

"My mom is dead, moron," Sasuke muttered, standing.

"Your mom is dead, un?" Deidara gasped, horrified. "How weird! I thought someone was missing from this house!"

"Yeah, like, everyone?" Sasuke said.

"Deidara, have some decency!" Kisame snapped, "This is a tender subject."

"Too bad we can't say the same for Itachi's steak, un," Deidara noted.

Itachi tapped his knife on his cement-block dinner.

As Deidara giggled, Sasori bopped him on the head. "You are far beyond rude."

"Your mom, un!"

"My mom is dead," Sasori said, calmly.

"Dammit! You guys ruin the fun of the 'your mom' joke, un!"

Kisame shifted in his seat, seemingly grateful for the change in topic. "What about you, Deidara, is your mom alive?"

"Nope!" Deidara smiled.

Sasori frowned.

Itachi stood.

"I'm going to go jack off, take a shower, and go to bed. Whosoever finds me in their bed can expect a good fuck."

With that said, Itachi turned away and stalked off.

Deidara frowned. "What if you're in Sasori master's and my bed?"

"Expect a threesome," Itachi called.

Deidara giggled madly, tapping his fingers together. Sasori yanked Deidara's pony tail and told him to hush.

"Threesome with Itachi, un!" Deidara squealed.

Sasuke stepped slowly to the back door.

"Sasuke, please, if you're hungry, finish your dinner," Kisame crooned.

"Not . . . hungry anymore," Sasuke grumbled.

Deidara reached for Sasuke's plate.

"He's afraid Itachi's going to be in his bed, un!" Deidara declared, scarfing down Sasuke's share of glazed carrots.

"Deidara, one more word, and you'll be more afraid of me than you are of Itachi," Sasori hissed.

"Deidara's not afraid of any weasels, un!" Deidara shouted with a mouthful of carrots.

"I will rip this beautiful mop of hair right off your pretty, empty head," Sasori said venomously.

Deidara said nothing; just grimaced.

"Please, Sasuke, finish eating," Kisame said softly.

"I do not want to get screwed," Sasuke said, glancing at the door.

Deidara made to speak, but stopped himself, reaching for his ponytail.

Sasori sighed. "What Deidara is -trying to say is 'Yes, you do, un!'"

His impersonation was so precise, it was scary.

"That was scary, un," Deidara mumbled.

"You spend too much time together," Kisame said, tapping his fork on his plate.

"Every waking moment!" Deidara said loudly, jumping at Sasori, who frowned, wide-eyed, before he was tackled. "I take him everywhere, un."

"OK, bye, I'm going to go jump off another pier, have fun, don't get cum all over the beds, I'll be back in a few days, take care, bye," Sasuke hurried for the door.

"Sasuke," Kisame said angrily.

Sasuke opened the door and rammed his head purposefully against it.

"Ow," Deidara said as he (totally) molested Sasori.

Once more, the door opened, hitting Sasuke in the head, but this time, someone came in.

"Here, bitches!" Hidan shouted, kicking his shoes off and passing Sasuke as if he were an awkwardly-placed lamp.

"You're late for dinner," said Kisame, taking his dirty dishes to the sink.

"We ate out," said Kakuzu, shutting the door behind him and ruining Sasuke's escape plan.

"Who eats Itachi's fuckin' dehydrated meals anyway, man? Not me; not when my boyfriend is loaded like a gun!" Hidan took a seat on Deidara.

"I am not your boyfriend, un!" Deidara shrieked, scrambling to get out from under Hidan. "I've been happily married in Canada, un!"

"Serious?" Hidan said, actually standing for shock.

"We were a little early to marry here in California," said Sasori.

"Marriage . . . " said Kakuzu in disdain.

"Marriage!" said Hidan, shaking his head in surprise.

"Mawwiage, un!" said Deidara, starry eyed.

"M-marriage!" Sasuke choked, and, at last, pried his attention from his brothers fucked up friends to his plan.

Which consisted merely of running for his life.

Which he did.

Which worked.

"Naruto!" Sasuke howled, slamming his fist to the door again and again. "Naruto! Naruto!"

"Leave me alone!" said the inside of the apartment.

"C'mon!"

The door flew open.

"Can't a guy go to bed at a reasonable hour without having a hand down his pants?"

"I'm not here to fuck you," Sasuke said slowly, scratching his nose. "In fact, I have no idea where you're getting this from."

Naruto shut the door and went back to bed.

"Yo, c'mon!" said Sasuke, slipping in after Naruto and locking the door. "I have something important to talk about!"

"Feed my cat," Naruto grunted, sliding into his room like a ghost.

Sasuke looked to Minato, who was all but dead, knocked out on the couch.

"He's sleeping."

"Good job."

"Are you high or something? Jesus!"

There was no reply.

"Naruto?" Sasuke peeked into the room.

Said Naruto was already asleep, half-way on the bed and half-way off.

"You are so dumb that I doubt you can do something even so simple as swimming," Sasuke sighed, lifting Naruto's lower half onto the bed. "What the hell were you doing today?"

"I knew it!" Naruto grumbled, waving his hand about to ward Sasuke off. "I knew you were trying to get into my pants!"

"I dunno, I'd rather get you out of them then get me into them."

"I knew it."

"You were falling off the bed; did you want me to leave you like that?"

"I like my toast jellied, thanks."

"I'll keep that in mind."

"Back up the truck, Bob, I've got the tuna."

Sasuke gasped dramatically. "And who is Bob?"

There was, surprisingly, no answer.

"Anyway, Naruto, I came here to talk to you about something."

A conversation with a can of pineapple preserves might have been more intense.

"Yo, wake up."

He prodded Naruto gently with his toe.

"I told you the air vents were a good idea!" Naruto said to his pillow.

"I should have listened," Sasuke said mournfully. "Now get up and we'll discuss in depth my lack of respect for air vents."

Naruto grumbled something incoherent.

Saske plopped on the bed in defeat.

"I don't need no education," Naruto mumbled before slipping into a much deeper sleep.

"Oh, no problem, I was just going to bring up the subject of marriage and how to cook fine steak, but if niether are important to you, I understand."

Naruto slept.

Sasuke smiled.

"You make yourself hard to resist," he muttered, kissing Naruto's forehead and standing up. "Well, good luck with the tuna. Don't forget to wake up in the morning."

He left.

"Another glass, Jude! And another letter from Prudence!" Naruto declared.

And life went on.

**TBC**

* * *

Well, the story will be continued . . . hopefully the crack won't.

Hopefully. Because that was just retarded.

The tuna line comes from a friend who actually said that in her sleep.

And I seriously want you guys to guess the second to the last line. That would be cool.


	21. DDR

**Those Weird Feelings No One Ever Gets**

OK, guys, sorry, but I don't think this one will be very good, since I got stuck and uninspired.

* * *

I rolled over in bed.

_It's too early to wake up, I know it is._

However early, I opened my eyes.

The room sat scalp-deep in ink and gouged out my eyes as soon as they were open.

I held my hand an inch from my eyes and attempted to squint it back into existence.

"What time is it?" I mumbled, turning to my alarm clock.

The familiar red glow was either hidden or gone, for there was no time to be told.

I made to reach for my side-table.

It was unusually hairy that night.

"The crap . . . ?" I mumbled, patting around for my lamp switch.

"I'm trying to sleep, here," Sasuke grunted.

"Turn on the light."

"No."

"What do you mean 'no'? Turn it on."

"No."

I heard him roll over, and he shoved me down from my sitting position.

"Go to sleep."

"What time is it?" I said, propping myself up with my elbows.

"I dunno, I unplugged your clock."

"Why, you idiot?"

"It's too bright. I dunno how you sleep with that thing right in your face."

"You've slept here hundreds of times, and this is the first time that's happened?"

"This is the first time I couldn't sleep," he growled, tugging on the blankets.

"Count sheep."

"My mind is too unimaginably complex for that."

"Why can't you sleep, weirdo?"

I managed to touch the curtains, and the lights of the city beyond dripped into my room.

Sasuke's eyes shone in the darkness like wet pebbles.

"I hurt," he said.

I smiled softly, secretly wondering if he could see it.

"Sasuke, no matter what happens with Neji, things will be OK. And you'll always have me to turn to, if that's comforting for you in any way."

I reached out carefully and touched his sloppy bangs.

"Not that," he growled. "Jesus, you're such a softy that you'd be a couch cushion if we hadn't come along."

"Then what are you talking about?" I said, losing my sympathy. "Did you hit your head or something?"

"Think back to an hour ago."

"We were playing scrabble."

He sighed.

"What else?"

"Um, we made smoothies?"

I could hear his patience winding down as if it was a loose string pulling from a shirt.

"And?"

"You spilt smoothie down your shirt when Minato jumped on your lap?"

"You're warm."

"Because I'm under the blankets."

"Oh my god. Just keep guessing, you idiot."

He mumbled something about my lack of sleep.

"You took your shirt off, and there was, like, smoothie everywhere."

"Yes?"

"Is that it? You're cold from smoothie?"

"Keep going."

"You shoved my face into the smoothie crap . . . "

"You're so slow at this shit. How can you not remember?"

I fell back onto the bed.

"Tired."

"You kind of fucked me, you moron."

I rolled over to look at him and our noses touched.

"You mean I topped?" I said in disbelief.

"You topped."

"I remember now!" I said, sticking out my tongue. "Can't believe I got away with that."

"Shut up."

"I hurt your pride," I sang. "I'm cool."

"You hurt more than that," he growled.

I was silent for only a moment before laughing in his face.

"Oh sweet Jesus! Your _ass _hurts? Oh my god, I think I just busted a gut!"

"Let's hope it was your dick. I wasn't cut out to bottom."

I rolled over until I was lying on top of him.

"Your feisty attitude makes the situation cute," I said.

"Geh uff!" he grunted, shoving me back onto the bed. "I was born to fuck you, and you know it."

"Hell nah," I said. "I have so much more fun screwing you than being screwed by you."

"There's absolutely nothing you like about having me doing you?"

"Well," I muttered, grateful that the darkness concealed my red face, "I do kinda like the way you . . . do that one thing, but not as much as— "

"What one thing?"

"The . . . lick-thing."

"Oh! The thing where I— "

"Don't say it out loud! Anyway, you can't tell me that Neji never did you."

"We never had sex."

My soul began to hug strangers and toss flowers about.

"You mean I'm your first and _only_?"

"No."

"What?'

"I gotta tell you: Itachi and I . . . well . . . "

"_What_?"

"Yes, you're my first and only."

"Don't _joke _about that kind of stuff!"

"It was funny, no?"

"No!"

"Incest is funny."

"No."

"Whatever, your face is funny. Anyway, Narusaurus, I was thinking while you were asleep— "

"How long was I asleep?"

"Probably four hours. I probably woke you up because I kept kicking you. Anyway— "

"Why the crap— ?"

"I was wondering: What do you think about Neji? I realized you never told me."

"You never asked me."

"Well, I didn't think I'd have to ask. I thought you'd say something, since the two of us had been dating."

I remembered how I'd thought Sasuke ridiculous for never asking my opinion on anything.

Oops. My bad.

"Why didn't you ask earlier?"

"I wanted you to tell me on your own, if it was major. Now I'm curious."

Oopsies.

"I dunno."

He was silent.

"Well, he's kinda rude . . . "

I felt him play with my hair.

"OK, so he's a complete dick-wad. I have no idea what you see in that guy. He's the biggest jerk I've ever met, and a total whore."

Sasuke ran his fingers along my hairline.

"He probably went to some academy for pimps, whores, and bitches. He's such an ass that I'm seriously surprised at how nice he smells. I'd usually beat the crap out of him if you didn't like him so much. I wouldn't save that guy from a mob of deranged monkeys if someone paid me for it."

I gritted my teeth and attempted to tear the mattress in half.

Sasuke kissed my cheek softly.

"I want you to get to know him."

I frowned deeply.

"I don't _want_ to get to know that douche-bag."

"_I _want you to."

"Sasuke, he's the biggest bastard I've ever met. I don't even want you to know him, but I will not go as far as knowing him myself."

"Just do this for me. I'll be hanging out with Neji a lot in order to help him out, and if you come along, you can help, and if you got to know him, I think you'd really like him."

"No, Sasuke, there's no way."

"You'll come along, though?"

I frowned.

"Yeah, fine."

"Go to bed."

I sighed and shut my eyes.

As I fell down a three-hundred step stair case in a castle in the Sahara, a soft nudge made me slam to the ground, which cracked open and laughed at me.

"Naruto."

I rubbed my head.

"Ow . . . "

"Ow? Whatever, wake up."

I glared up the staircase at the talking bear.

"I'm awake, obviously," I growled. "I just fucking hit my head on a stone floor and you think I'd be asleep?"

"Naruto. What, did you die? Wake up."

I opened my eyes.

"Hm . . . ?"

"It's Tuesday, come on. We have to get to school."

"No," I grumbled, rolling over.

In the end, Sasuke bit my thumb until I finally got up.

Gaara did not sit at our lunch table that day.

Or any other table, as far as I could see.

And that day, I met the most bad-ass girl in my entire life.

She was beating up a guy in the hallway for calling her a hoe.

And she totally knew what she was doing.

Gotta say, she was pretty too, with pink hair. I think I've seen her before, though.

But, she was also a Sasuke-idiot, so she was out.

But, man, if ever anything was hot . . .

After school, Sasuke and I did our homework at his place.

"Give that back, un!" Deidara was shouting as he ran past us in the living room.

"Pay me, shit-head!" Hidan laughed, holding Deidara's latest sculpture above his head.

"I don't owe you any money, you fucker, un!" Deidara said, kicking Hidan in the shin.

"You fucking dick!" Hidan howled, dropping the sculpture.

"Bastard, un!" Deidara screeched, scooping up the two pieces of his sculpture and shoving Hidan into the wall.

"Fuck you, it's your own fault for fucking kicking me!"

"Sasori!" Deidara cried, holding his sculpture away from Hidan. "Mastar Sasori, un! Hidan's being an ass-wipe, un!"

Sasori sighed in the other room.

"Hidan, get your ass in here!" Kakuzu shouted.

"Don't ruin my house," Sasuke said simply, leaning over and correcting my math problems.

"Shut up, brat! You're not involved, un!" Deidara hissed.

"Just don't ruin it," he said again.

"I will fucking tear your fucking throat out, you little piece of shit!" Hidan shouted at Sasuke as Kakuzu dragged him into Sasuke's room.

"Don't ruin my room!" Sasuke called after them as he tapped the point of his pencil on the correct answer on his paper. "Just do the same thing for every problem, like that."

"But that was the last problem," I said.

The doorbell rang.

The house was silent at last.

The sanest man in the house answered the door.

"Oh, Neji," said Kisame. "Come in, come in."

Sasuke hesitated in his actions for only a second before going about his English homework.

His body moved as if it were an ancient system made of wood.

Deidara hissed as he looked from his sculpture to Neji. "Another kid?"

"They're only three years younger than you, Dei. Give it a rest," said Kisame, shutting the door behind Neji and walking back into the kitchen.

Sasuke stared scorch marks onto his papers.

I tapped my eraser rapidly against the coffee table.

After a minute or two of producing clay out of his jacket pocket, Deidara set his finished product on my papers and gestured at it.

"Good as new, right, un?"

"What does a brat's opinion matter?" I grunted.

"Answer the question, un!" Deidara demanded, pointing at the sculpture.

"I guess. But the sandy color is boring. Why don't you paint it?"

Deidara's face lit up.

"Why don't I paint it, un . . . ?"

He scooped up the sculpture and rushed into the kitchen.

"Sasori, un! I need paint, un!"

I looked up.

Neji caught my eye and nodded towards Sasuke.

I scowled and patted my open hand on my chest.

_Mine. _

He frowned deeply.

"There," said Sasuke. "Done. Just copy those." He stood up. "Want a coke?"

"Meh, sure," I said, writing down the problem number on my paper.

Sasuke swept past Neji without a glance.

While Sasuke was in the kitchen, I could feel Neji's urge to say something to me growing.

But I was the enemy.

I heard Sasuke open the coke as he walked back in and set the can in front of me.

"If it seems like there's, like, a sip less or something, then you're delusional."

"Probably Itachi," I said.

"Oh yeah, it was. But he won't tell you that."

"Sasuke!" Itachi called.

"OK, it wasn't Itachi, it was me."

"Don't ignore your guest," Itachi said.

Sasuke glanced feverishly at Neji.

"Coke?" he said shortly.

Neji smiled, but his voice was crying in deep sorrow.

"Sure."

I realized then why I had let him into my apartment the day before.

"They're in the refrigerator door."

Neji's smile dropped.

"Ugh," I grumbled, standing and walking into the kitchen.

Itachi watched me with a knowing look as I got a coke from the fridge.

"Here."

I tossed the coke at Neji.

He stared down at it.

"Thanks . . . "

I sat myself down next to Sasuke, leaning over my papers.

"No problem."

The interaction between the two of us and Neji grew thinner and thinner until it was a broken thread on the floor.

Sasuke shook his head.

"You can't even copy right. It's four plus five, not nine plus five."

"I hate this algebra shit," I said, erasing and rewriting.

A shadow parted the glass between us and Neji and Sasuke and I looked up at Itachi.

"Neji," said Itachi, setting a hand on his shoulder and leading him over to the couch where Sasuke and I sat. "It's been a while. Have a seat."

Neji, who seemed absolutely wary towards Itachi, carefully took a seat next to me.

"Uh, yes," Neji mumbled, looking down at the top of his coke.

"How about you boys finish up and I'll drive the three of you to the mall."

It was a statement. There was no getting out of it.

And so it was.

In the back seat, I sat between Neji and Sasuke.

I leaned carefully towards Sasuke's ear, resting my chin on his shoulder.

"What the fuck happened to helping him out?" I breathed.

Sasuke stiffened and tapped his fingers on his knees.

"I don't know what's wrong. I'm nervous," he whispered.

We glanced at Neji, who stared out the window sadly.

"Well, do you have a game plan?"

"I was thinking about just talking first."

Itachi glanced in the rear-view mirror.

"Sasuke," he said in his low voice.

Sasuke sat alert. "What?"

"Tomorrow my university is having something of an open-house for high school students. I signed you out of school so you might come take a look around."

"You signed Naruto out, right?"

Neji shifted uncomfortably.

"No. Sorry, Naruto, I didn't think you'd want to come."

I shook my head. "I wouldn't like it."

I wouldn't like being without Sasuke even more.

"Then I'll go to school," said Sasuke.

"Sorry, Sasuke. You're going to have to go with us."

Sasuke paled.

"More than one? Like, all of you nut-jobs?"

"All of us as in Deidara, Sasori, Hidan, Kakuzu, Kisame, and me."

"Why didn't you say something earlier?" Sasuke growled.

Itachi stared at the road. "I have to have some sort of grasp on you, Sasuke. Mother and Father aren't here to keep you on he right path, and I'm very busy. I know you want to go to college, and I need to help you, as a college student, as your guardian, and as your older brother."

Sasuke crossed his arms, but a look of content slipped out and over his face.

When Itachi stopped in front of the mall, we said our goodbyes, waved our cell phones at him to assure that we could be reached, and got out.

He drove away.

Sasuke and I threw a shady glance each towards Neji.

"Um . . . " Neji slid his hands into his back pockets.

"Let's go," Sasuke grumbled, taking my hand and pushing open the door to the JC Penny.

I quickly stopped the door from slamming in Neji's face.

"Thanks," he mumbled.

I looked away from his bleeding eyes before he could look up at me.

"What'd'ya wanna do?" Sasuke said, looking to me. "I kind of felt like going to the arcade."

"Sounds good."

I narrowed my eyes as he looked into them.

He furrowed his brow.

I nodded back at Neji.

"You have to talk to him," I whispered.

He frowned deeply. "I don't know what to say."

"Neji," I said, looking back at him.

He looked up from his feet.

"Hm?"

A look of surprise dusted his features.

A look of horror struck Sasuke's face the same way one strikes a gong.

"You like DDR?"

A smirk slid over his lips.

Did he ever.

"I hope you know this is war!" I shouted, stomping angrily on an arrow after losing for the third time against Neji.

"Just because you suck . . . " he said, crossing his arms, though panting nonetheless.

"No!" I pointed at him accusingly. "You cheat!"

"You suck."

He shrugged.

"Woah, woah, I _will_ win, once I figure out how to debug this piece of shit!"

I kicked the machine.

"Just accept it."

"There's no way!" I howled, tearing at my hair. "I am unbeatable! Right, Sasuke? Right?"

"Not anymore!" he laughed.

"Air hockey!" I shouted, pointing at the table. "I know I can beat your sorry ass at _that_! This is my _domain_! I rule!"

I lost.

I fucking lost.

"Perhaps there is a new king?" Neji sneered.

I chucked my little hockey-bumper-thing at him.

"Queen, more like it," I hissed.

"Anything else you'd like to lose at? I'm pretty good at pinball, racing, shooting . . . "

"Get the fuck out!" I growled, crossing my arms.

He laughed with a sharp sourness.

"Since you used your money, how about I treat you to a smoothie?" he laughed.

I took note of the sudden cheer in his voice.

"Yeah, yeah, whatever," I grumbled as Sasuke and I followed Neji out of the arcade and to the food court.

Sasuke smiled.

I turned my head towards him.

"What's the smile?"

"I could ask you the same thing," he said, not looking at me.

I frowned.

Of course, I was _not _smiling.

He shoved me.

"That was good," he said. "You done good."

"Tell me about it."

He shook his head as we stepped up next to Neji at the Juice it Up.

I took note that Sasuke was standing next to Neji.

And that he was two inches taller than Sasuke.

We sat on the fountain as we drank our smoothies.

Our silence foamed about us like bubbles in a bath tub.

"I wonder what everyone wishes for, statistically, when they drop coins in fountains," said Sasuke slowly.

"I wonder what they _really _wish for," said Neji.

"I know."

They looked at me.

"Why, they wish for the benefit of Mr. Kite, don't you know?"

"Woulda never thought," said Sasuke."

"That's a lot of people who know the same guy," said Neji.

"That's a lot of the same guy," said Sasuke.

I took a note on how well they got on.

Seeing as I never would have thought.

Somewhere inside, I smiled.

Somewhere inside, I cried.

Somewhere inside, there was peace.

"What happens to the coins, anyway?" said Sasuke.

Neji and I shrugged.

Sasuke pulled out a coin.

"I wish that my shoe laces will never fray," he said, and he tossed the coin a few feet in front of him onto the ground."

"You missed," I pointed out, sipping my smoothie.

"I guess it's better off over there," said Neji, sitting Indian-style on the fountain.

I gave him a look.

Sasuke nodded.

"Listen," Sasuke said, leaning on me, "don't you love to find change on the ground?"

"Yeah."

"But, afterwards?"

"I lose it in the wash."

"There!" he pointed his cup at me. "So, what's the point of keeping it when someone else will find it and be happy?"

I frowned.

"_You_ get the happiness of finding change, and then the happiness of knowing that someone else will be happy finding it," said Neji.

I tapped my straw on my chin.

It was obvious that they'd had this conversation before.

"Course, I keep quarters," said Sasuke.

"Meh," said Neji, as intelligent as he is.

Sasuke's ring tone began to play.

"Brother," he said, holding his phone to his ear.

Neji dipped his fingers in the fountain water.

I sipped from Sasuke's cup.

"Yeah, 'kay," said Sasuke, whipping his cup away from me.

He hung up.

"Itachi's going to be here in, like, five minutes, so I'm going to go peeee," he set his smoothie down and stood up, "and then we'll go out front."

He ran for the bathrom.

I looked at Neji.

He looked at me.

"Ah yes," I said, standing up.

He raised an eyebrow.

I held out my hand.

"I'm Naruto. Uzumaki Naruto."

He looked at my hand inquisitively.

He looked at my soft smile.

He smiled a small smile to himself.

"Neji. Hyuuga Neji."

We shook hands.

And I kept smiling.

**TBC**

* * *

Sorry that these chapters suck eggs, guys. I'm totally uninspired.

But, on the plus side, if I'm not too much of a lazy ass to do it, I have a bombing idea for a sequel to this story. And it's actually got a plot, unlike this one. And even I think it's an awesome idea, which is uncommon, since I think all my ideas are mediocre.

CURRENTLY ON A BEATLES HIGH. I JUST SAW ACROSS THE UNIVERSE TWICE, AND I AM SO IN LOVE. HURHUR. I AM A TARD.


	22. Butter Cracker

**Those Weird Feelings No One Ever Gets**

Wow, so not having writing block, now.

Back in the old swing of things: everything gives me inspiration for this story. Even Town House crackers.

I made a booboo in this chapter right in the first few lines, and it goes on through a lot of the rest of the beginning, so I'm just going to change it in the last chapter, rather than changing this one. (If you don't know what it is, then it's not worth explaining.)

* * *

"Hey?" Sasuke called as he pushed open his front door.

"The cars are gone," said Neji, pulling off his shoes as we stepped inside.

As I closed the door and bent down to untie my shoes, I watched as Sasuke kicked off his own shoes.

I watched as Neji watched him, too.

I scrunched up my face.

_Sharing is caring_, I thought to myself. _Sharing is caring, sharing is caring, sharing is caring._

I was just waiting for Sasuke to fall and for Neji to catch him.

I flashed an angry glance towards Neji.

He raised an eyebrow.

Oh, shit, I had no idea he was watching, that douche . . .

"What, you need help getting your shoes off?" he sneered.

"No," I bit, chucking my shoe at his head.

"Play nice, kiddies," Sasuke called as he turned the lights on in the kitchen.

Neji wandered slowly over to the kitchen.

He paused, lingering between the front door and the kitchen like a buoy bobbing in the waves.

I set my shoe down carefully, watching.

He did not move.

"You guys hungry?" said Sasuke, and I heard the refrigerator open.

We were silent.

"Either I'm so wrong that you're speechless, or I'm so right that you're speechless."

"I'm not hungry," I said, eyes pasted to Neji's back.

Neji's left foot scooted forward.

Mmhmm, you just wait and see what happens . . .

"Yeah, me neither."

I narrowed my eyes.

"Meh," said Sasuke as he came out with an apple. "Don't complain when you get hungry."

Neji rolled his eyes.

I stepped slowly into the living room.

"Anyway, Itachi left a note," Sasuke continued, handing the paper to me.

I forced a smirk off my face.

What now? I got the note and you didn't . . .

As I quickly skimmed over the note (_ . . . went to Hidan's . . . come pick you up in the morning . . ._ ), the realization of my growing bitterness towards Neji struck me.

My eyes stared down at the paper, but I wasn't seeing anything.

What the hell was I doing?

Was I trying to turn into a total ass?

I dunno, it felt so real, as if I suddenly hated him.

It burnt my throat when I swallowed and stung my nose when I inhaled.

As I stared at the paper, completely indifferent to the abrupt silence in the room, I figured it out.

This wasn't hatred.

This wasn't jealousy.

It was love.

I jumped at the thought of loving Neji.

No, no, I couldn't . . .

But, of course, I was wrong.

It was Sasuke, again.

I was being protective, greedy, stingy, and uncaring.

Summed up, I was on the verge of being a total bitch.

Completely uncalled for, if you ask me, and I was the one doing it.

How could I blame Neji?

I mean, I know what it's like to love Sasuke.

An eruption of butterflies swept through my entire body.

I knew what it was like to be the one in a meaningless love; to be the one who couldn't have him.

Being a brat and an ass toward Neji wouldn't make it any easier.

"Sudden genius showing?"

I blinked several times before focusing on Sasuke's face.

"Wha?"

"That's a genius for you," said Neji.

I bit back a 'fuck you'.

Sasuke glanced at the clock above the TV.

I glanced at Neji.

He was looking at Sasuke again.

_Damnit, damnit, damnit._

I didn't know what it was.

It was like when people get, or at least got, unknown diseases.

What the hell is it?

Take some blood.

Or, back in the day, take lots and lots of blood.

I'd never been afraid of needles, thank god.

Because I would sacrifice some blood for the sake of researching this new illness.

"It looks like a severe case of love," they'll say. "Give him some pain killers and a tissue, and he'll be fine in the morning."

If only.

But, seriously, what the hell was it?

I mean, why would I be jealous when I was the one in the position that _he _wanted?

Just plain bitter? That had never happened before, even towards kids who had made fun of me.

Maybe it was more complicated? Angry that he was jealous of me?

That just didn't feel like it.

"Anyway," Sasuke said, unbuttoning his jacket, "Itachi's note said that he'd be here earlier than you guys have to wake up, so I gotta go to bed."

"Then I got your guest room," said Neji, heading for the room in which Deidara and Sasori had been sleeping.

The same feeling struck me again and again, as if I were a drum.

I paid rapt attention.

The corners of my lips dug down into my face and the muscles in my jaw tightened.

I hooked a passing thought and reeled it in.

It jabbered and fumed and flared its nostrils.

_Get the fuck out, you whore! You think he wants you to pull anything else that's going to make him fuckin' _cry_? No one wants an inconsiderate, heartless, self-centered bitch like you in their house! Stay for the night and expect a fuckin' beating! I will _not _let you stay here, not with Sasuke in the house! You-_

I quickly let it go, hoping it hadn't taken over my face.

But Neji was already heading for the guest room, and Sasuke was pulling off his shirt as he stepped into his room.

"What, you gonna sleep out there?" Sasuke called.

I rolled my eyes and hurried to his room.

I went to sit on his bed, when Neji called to us.

"Um, nice . . . redecorating?"

Sasuke and I looked into each others' eyes, as if substituting Neji's, as we couldn't see him.

"White?" Sasuke called sarcastically.

"If you seriously think it's white, then you need to come take a look."

We frowned at each other.

Sasuke tugged his pajama shirt on and started for the door, with me right on his heels.

He looked into the room.

Then he turned right back around to his room.

I furrowed my eyebrows and looked into the room.

On the walls was every color that my small, unintelligent mind could come up with.

The paint was splattered in some places, as if it was an accident, but it was all mostly painted on, and in no particular pattern or shape.

It was just a mess.

On the floor were puddles of dried paint in all the same colors as the walls, though some spots looked to be wet.

Slowly, so slowly, I looked up.

On the ceiling was written, in blue paint, a message.

"Thanks for the advice, un!"

And, beside that was a winking face with its tongue sticking out, making a peace sign.

"Shit . . . " I said, pulling out the word as far as it would stretch.

I stared at Neji in an absent disbelief, hardly seeing him, though, in the back of my mind, I was watching him as he pulled off his paint-smeared socks.

He went about his business until he finally looked up, noticing I was still there.

I could see the sarcastic remark coil over his body as he made to speak.

"I can't . . . " I started, glancing at the walls again and finally stepping back to Sasuke's room.

As I shut the door softly, I heard Neji scoff.

_Shut the hell up, _I thought I hissed aloud, but it never made it to my lips.

"Oh man," was all I said as I sat down beside the lump of blankets that was Sasuke on the bed.

"It's better than white," Sasuke mumbled, rolling over and looking up at me. "You goanna be OK alone with Neji tomorrow morning?"

I slid down and under the covers, Sasuke's eyes level with mine, close enough to feel the fanning of his eyelashes.

"Yeah, so long as he cooks breakfast."

"Lucky. He cooks better than me."

"That's not saying _too_ much."

Sasuke shrugged.

There was a silence like that of a stirring of feathers.

We sure as hell weren't tired.

Sasuke tugged at my bangs and ran his forefinger back and forth across my forehead.

I watched as his careful hand moved masterfully in front of my eyes.

"Joo are getting shleepy," Sasuke said with someone else's accent.

I bit his knuckles.

"Nope."

"Zat vasn't a kesstion," he said, flicking my nose. "Joo _are _getting shleepy."

"Not am not – am not getting sleepy."

"How would you even _know?_ You don't even know WHO you are!"

"You're clearly the one getting sleepy!"

"You're so sleepy that you're becoming delusional!"

"You're so delusional that you think I'm sleepy and delusional!"

"Now you're just insane."

I flopped on to my back in mock heart-ache.

"Are you saying you don't love me?"

"I will love you even when you're sixty-four."

"And you'll still be sending me a Valentine?"

Sasuke nodded solemnly. "Birthday greeting, bottle of wine."

I wiggled my toes to make the blanket wave around my feet.

"You need to go to sleep."

Sasuke cuddled up to me and reminded me exactly of Minato.

"Sing to me."

A swift blush distracted me from his purr-like humming.

"I can't sing."

"Hmmm, if you can talk, mmmm, you can sing, mmmhmmm," he said between purring and humming and moaning all over me.

"I don't know what to sing."

"Nnnnn, sing mmmmmeeee . . . mmmmm . . . the song stuck in your cute little head . . . hmmm . . . "

"I've not one."

"Sing me . . . " here, the queerest of sounds came from deep within his belly, like an actual purr, "the first song that commmmmmes to mind."

I was silent for a moment as his strange purring and humming and moaning and murmuring became something of a comfort, like the soft voices of the cellos after an up-roar of drums and trumpets, or the bubble of the lazy creek slipping sleepily down its path.

Course, I've never actually listened for these, but I assume that's what it's like.

As I thought, his nuzzling and purring slowed.

I coughed slightly.

"Picture yourself," I said quietly, "in a boat on a river . . . with tangerine trees . . . and marmalade skies."

Now Sasuke had stopped moving altogether, with one arm around me, and his purring reduced to the soft hum of his breathing.

"Somebody calls you, you answer quite slowly . . . 'a girl with kaleidoscope eyes' . . . Cellophane flowers of yellow and green . . . towering over your head . . . Look for the girl with the sun in her eyes and she's gone . . . "

Sasuke looked at me expectantly.

I sighed.

"Lucy in the _sky _with diamonds. Lucy in the _sky _with diamonds. _Lucy _in the _sky _with _diamonds_." I hummed the 'oh's softly.

Sasuke looked up, and there was a child looking out at me from behind his eyes.

"Follow her down to a bridge by a fountain . . . where rocking horse people eat marshmallow pies . . . Everyone smiles as you drift past the flowers . . . that grow so in_cred_ibly high . . . Newspaper taxis appear on the shore . . . waiting to take you aw_ay_. Climb in the back with your head in the clouds . . . and you're gone."

As I sang, I imagined the lyrics coming to life.

I imagined Sasuke in the taxi.

"Lucy in the _sky_ . . . with diamonds. Lucy in the _sky _with _dia_monds. _Lucy _in the _sky_ with dia_monds. _Mmmm . . . "

Sasuke finally laid his head on my chest.

"Picture yourself," I cooed, "on a train in a station . . . with plastacine porters . . . with looking-glass ties . . . Suddenly someone is there at the turn-style . . . the girl with ka_lei_doscope eyes . . . "

Sasuke stared on ahead into nothing, his eyes as wide as they were all day long.

"Lucy . . . in the sky . . . with diamonds . . . Lucy in the sky . . . with diamonds . . . Lucy in . . . the sky . . . with diamonds . . . " I slowed peacefully, humming the chorus gently into nothingness.

Sasuke closed his eyes.

"Again."

I rolled onto my side, cradling his chin on my shoulder and burying my face in his.

"Picture yourself," I muttered, playing with his bangs, "on a beach in a country . . . where magical mattresses give taxi cab rides . . . You look to the moon and I call to you slowly, 'Sasuke, go to bed before the sunrise.'"

"That was pretty good," Sasuke mumbled, the touch of his lips like a warm light on my skin.

"You're tiring quickly, your eyes start to close, let my song carry you aw_ay_. With the moon's embrace and my heart here for you, go to _bed_ . . . Sasuke in a _be-ed _with shoes off. Sasuke in a _be-ed _with shoooes off. _Sasuke _in a _be-ed _with shoooes off. Ooooooh."

"That was kind of lame."

I sighed.

"What do I have to do, tell you a bedtime story?"

"Yes," he said bluntly.

"Once upon a time I told you a bedtime story, and you fell asleep. The End."

"A bedtime _story_, not a bedtime _sentence_."

I said nothing.

"Come oooon."

I squeezed my eyes shut and pretended I was asleep.

"Do I have to whine?"

We were silent.

At last, Sasuke heaved a great groan of a sigh, and his body melted underneath my arms and fingers.

"Good night, babe," he muttered.

"Babe," I laughed.

I could feel his retort.

He settled against me without a sound.

I was driving though the Forest of Sight on a pleasant spring day.

Alec strode through the air beside my little red car.

When I turned my head to him, he shot off like a firework in a cascade of diamonds.

In the glare of the sun and the hands of the afternoon, Lucy laughed bells and smiled blooming flowers, her eyes twinkling morning dew drops.

I waved to her.

She waved back, and a flurry of brilliant, sparkling butterflies appeared in her hand's path.

I brought the car to a stop.

And was woken with such a start that there was no transition from dream to reality.

A slamming on the door made me jump out of my dream and open my eyes.

Sasuke stared back at me with a groggy surprise.

"Sasuke, get up!"

We were both too dazed to tell who it was, and, following Sasuke's lead, I sunk back into bed and formed into Sasuke's embrace.

"Screw that," Sasuke grumbled hoarsely.

"Sasuke!"

The door opened and who I could now tell was Kisame stepped into the room.

"Sasuke, as comfortable and blissful as you are, you have to get up."

The only movement we made was to move closer together.

"Sasuke, you have to the count of ten before I take drastic measures."

We actually started to fall back to sleep.

"One . . ."

I relished the sweet song of a near-by sparrow and Sasuke's slow, rhythmic breathing.

"Two . . . "

Sasuke pulled himself closer to me, the hair on the nape of his neck tickling my nose.

Somewhere between hearing 'three' and letting my hand fall to the mattress, I fell back to sleep.

However, immediately after I heard the door shut, I started once more, and, breathing in his sweet aroma one last time, kissed Sasuke's ear and spoke at last.

"Saucey-cakes," I meowed, similarly to his strange little purring and humming the night before. "Time to get up, Saucey."

"No," he said snootily (though in a sleepy mumble).

I ran my hand up his back, and his shiver only made me want the same reaction a million times again.

"Sauce-_y_," I crooned, tugging the very top of his ear lightly with my teeth. "Gotta get up."

"No."

I settled closer to him, sleepy butterflies stirring in my stomach as the bare skin of our chests and shoulders touched.

"Sasuke."

I ran my fingers over his back.

He shuddered just enough for me to notice.

In no time, I found myself scratching his back gently and tenderly, like a mother does her little toddler, snotty brat, or rebellious teenager.

"Nn," Sasuke mumbled, rubbing his cheek against mine, stealing a taste of my skin and lips as he turned. "I'd pay you to do this to get me up every morning."

"I'm becoming your at-home maid," I muttered, scratching the spot between his shoulder blades.

His shoulders rolled in approval under my touch, and a solid, full-on moan leaked at last.

"Though, I gotta, say, _I'd_ pay to hear you make sounds like that without having to do any— "

At last, Kisame's threat took effect.

The door swung open and crashed into the wall behind it.

"Good morning, un!"

Sasuke yanked the covers over our heads.

"Time for the getting up, un!"

I could feel the bed toss us gently as Deidara hopped about on the mattress.

"Don't make me sit on you, un!" he howled, slamming down on our legs once, then hopping back to his feet.

"If we ignore him, he'll go away," Sasuke muttered.

"I bought doughnuts, un!"

"Hey, man, you're the one who has to get up."

"I'll fart on your heads, un!"

He did rip one, but, thankfully, not yet on our heads.

"This guy who was so affectionate and scratching my back 37 seconds ago is now turning on me."

"Hey, hey, blondie, un!"

"Is he talking about himself?" I asked.

"Whiskers, un! Lookit, lookit; I took you advise, un!"

We peaked carefully out of the covers.

"You can't see it unless you take the blankets off, un!"

Sasuke tossed the blanket to his waist.

"Lookit!"

We lookited.

In his (well-manicured) hands were two of his clay sculptures, one very impressively of a crane, the other of a spider.

Even more striking was that, rather than the dusty-sand color that we'd been shown the last forty times, both were painted in unfitting but striking, suiting colors.

"I'm good, un! Tell me I'm good."

"They're amazing," I said slowly, running my fingers through my hair and sinking back into bed.

Sasuke grunted and pulled the covers over his head.

In utter horror, I watched Deidara's dumbest move yet.

"Get up, teenage slime, un!" Deidara roared, chucking the spider-sculpture at Sasuke's with surprising force.

It slammed against Sasuke-lump and smashed into several large pieces and a gazillion little chips.

Indeed, he sat up as if he'd been set on fire.

"Fuckin' a'!" he hissed, rubbing the back of his neck and head. "You tryin' to kill me, fuckin' bastard?"

"Get up, un!"

"What the fuckin' hell? Get the fuck out!"

"Up!" Deidara shouted, chucking the second statue at Sasuke, which he dodged, and it smashed against the wall.

"I'm up!" Sasuke howled, jumping to his feet, shoving Deidara towards the door. "Get OUT!"

"Poor blondie has to put up with this every morning, un," Deidara said scornfully.

A wicked grin slid across his face as his eyes met mine, and he skipped out of the room.

Eventually, Sasuke calmed down enough to get dressed, while I pushed the mess of sculptures off the bed and laid back down.

"I gotta go," Sasuke said angrily, leaning over me as I slowly drifted back to sleep.

"Don't get killed," I mumbled sweetly, touching his cheek as he kissed me.

I think we had both been expecting a soft, tender kiss good-bye that would last but a moment.

However, it was clear that we both would rather spend a few extra minutes with a long, breathless, hair-gripping kiss instead.

As the last word lifted from my lips, it was caught to his and pressed neatly between us as his lips came to mine like the lid comes to its box.

After a moment of the simple touch of our lips, I felt him begin to lift away.

In the panic of remembering that I wouldn't see him all day, I tilted my head up and kissed him back as smoothly as I could, trying not to seem, you know, desperate or anything.

Of course, he accepted this willingly and leaned back down, and for an instant, there was a world in which our joined lips was enough, and the touch of hands and skin, or the parting of lips, or the melody of words was not needed to make love and life and happiness any sweeter, for there was nothing so sweet as the soft cushion of his loving lips against mine.

But the spell broke as foot steps passed by the door way, and we simultaneously opened up and dove in.

Sasuke was so feverish, you would have thought that this was the night before the day of his deployment to Vietnam or something.

Yeah, yeah, I know, Vietnam is over, but it fits better than Iraq, so shut up.

I tried to stand my ground at first, but I soon found myself merely trying to keep up, and then trying not to get devoured.

Sasuke was tops on that one.

If ever he played the dominant role, it was then.

I felt extremely like the dainty, breakable (and extremely hot) rape victim in all the common hentai I'd ever watched.

'Cept this time, I never did end up acting like I didn't want it, I just ended up hopelessly submissive and taken-advantage of (not to the disrespectful or insulting level, though, really).

In good time, I found myself hot in the face, gripping the back of Sasuke's shirt, one leg around his waist, several inches off the mattress.

"Ah, you . . . " I tried as Sasuke finally broke away, his heavy breathing spreading goose bumps over my skin as he gnawed not-so-delicately on my lower lip. "You . . . uhn . . . you have to . . . g-go . . . "

"I'll stay," he breathed, gliding his teeth over my jaw-line and neck.

"Ha . . . get out of here," I said, weakly attempting to push him away.

I could have done it if I wanted him out.

Seriously.

Like a puppy would, he nipped and bit playfully and left his spit all over my face and neck.

Sounds pretty nasty, but it's pretty nice in the heat of the moment.

Until you have to wipe it all off, and you've got dried saliva all over yourself.

Urgh.

But, if I haven't completely turned you off, let's get back to the bedroom, shall we?

Sasuke, who was, by this time, practically molesting me out of my pants (seriously, they were off by now), was straddled over me.

He had tried to get my shirt off, but I'd managed to stop him at that, so he contented himself with pushing it up over my stomach and all but sucking my stomach off my body.

"G-get . . . out!" I squeaked, pushing his stomach with my feet.

"Tickles?" he said as he ran his fingers over my sides.

"Y-yes!"

My back arced on its own, and I gripped Sasuke's hair, not knowing if I should press him closer, or pull him away.

"Ha, you taste like marshmallow today," Sasuke laughed, pushing my shirt up farther and grazing his teeth over the skin of my chest.

My hands moved instinctively, slamming his face into my chest.

"Get . . . out . . . " I said, forcing my words to come (though they cracked) as Sasuke feasted on me like some kind of carnivorous beast.

He looked up at me, his foggy eyes and messy hair making him look hypnotized.

Our bodies moved against each other without harmony as we heaved in great amounts of air.

So, his eyes, with their confused look of want, his skin, so pale with its splotchy pink spreading over it like a spill, his mouth, wet and dripping, almost stupidly, not just parted, but gaping like a dying fish: all together, in some mental harmony, made him so sexy . . . just so . . .

I snatched up his bangs and nearly tore them out as I yanked him to me, our teeth smashing together painfully, even breaking the skin.

He yelped into my kiss, which only egged me on.

I tasted our blood in his mouth.

He fell onto me as if he couldn't keep himself up, or didn't want to, in the least.

I pressed my hands to his face, pressing my fingers on his skin to the point that I was nearly digging in.

I heard the door open, but I didn't stop.

Slowly, the lead was lost, it was all chaos.

A voice shouted at us from the doorway.

We didn't stop.

The voice shouted again.

Sasuke, his mouth open wide, gasped for air, still trying to keep the kiss going at the same time.

It was all out of control.

One last time, the voice shouted at us.

Immediately following was the sound of smashing clay, and a shower of chunks and splinters of broken sculpture.

Sasuke stopped the moment before I did, his eyes closed in pain.

"Get the fuck up, punk, un! I have plenty more where that came from! Un!"

"Don't kill him, you imbecile."

"What the fuck? How the fuck old are these fuckin' kids? Shit!"

"Hidan, how the hell did you get my camera?"

"Sasuke! Naruto'll still be here when you get back! We have to go!"

"Come along, Sasuke. You have matters to attend to."

"Should I hit him with another sculpture, un?"

"No. Give me those, you're not allowed to hold on to them anymore."

Gripping the back of his head and gritting his teeth, Sasuke stood at last, staggering away from the bed.

I watched, frowning, as Itachi, an air of humor about him, grabbed Sasuke carefully by the shoulder and led him out of the room, shutting the door behind him.

I shakily wiped a glob of spit from the corner of my mouth.

"Ew . . . "

As I rubbed the rest of the Sasuke-spit from my face, neck, shoulders, and stomach, I heard a laugh from the room beside mine.

In between being wide awake and getting too tired to keep my eyes open, I cursed Neji, and heard a car drive away.

And I dreamt of only Sasuke.

It was one of those dreams that you never, never want to wake from, that you feel is completely real.

Then, when you open your eyes, still thinking it's real, to find it was all in your head, you promptly go back to sleeping and dreaming, until you do it all over again.

And, when I woke the first time from a dream about Sasuke and me taking a newspaper taxi cab ride, I was quite pleased to open my eyes to Sasuke's sleeping face facing mine.

I smiled sleepily and touched his cheek softly.

His eye lashes fluttered at the same moment that I dropped back into sleep, picking up from where he opened his eyes, smiling at me, touching my cheeks and shoulders, petting my forehead.

Once again, I woke up to Sasuke's sleeping face, so peaceful and serene.

I would have kissed it if I knew he wouldn't wake up.

But again, I only looked for what was probably a second and a half, and I fell back to sleep.

I dreamt of Sasuke forever sleeping, like Sleeping Beauty, never moving, never smiling.

It was pretty angsty and dramatic.

There were sword fights and little gnomes that I had to hit with my sword hilt, and I had to climb up the side of a tower covered in giant thorns.

I was at the window when I was woken up.

I opened my eyes slowly, finding myself on my back instead of my side.

Sasuke stroked my cheek gently.

"Hmm . . . Good morning," I mumbled, closing my hand around his and turning on my side.

Imagine waking up the same way, or, if you don't have a boyfriend or girlfriend, waking up to your dog or cat or whatever, or, even, your sibling or parent waking you up gently.

Now, imagine looking to them, whomever, and finding something you didn't expect: someone you never talk to and hardly even know the name of, a dog you don't know instead of your cat, a complete stranger, a three headed snake dripping green slime . . .

That was how I felt when I realized that Sasuke had left.

And, not only was he not there, but he'd left me in the hands of the jerkiest, most perverted, most disrespectful slime ball to ever ooze.

"What the hell?" I screeched, slapping Neji's hand away and falling off the bed in a heap. "What the fuckin' hell? What do you think you're doing? Where the fuck is Sasuke? Sasuke? Sasuke! What the fuck? Get out of here! Sasuke!" (Author's Interjection: Hahaha, this reminds me of the part from "Oliver and Company"! "Winston! Winston! Bark! Bark bark bark! Winston? Win-STON!" Naruto, you kill me.)

Through my flaming malice, I was able to watch Neji lay back down.

I think something sprang a leak, because I was suddenly speechless and motionless.

"We still have over an hour to sleep. Go back to bed."

I gaped.

What the hell?

I mean, man, what the fucking hell?

I looked around to double check that I was in the right room.

"Wh . . . what the . . . ?"

I stood up slowly.

"What the hell are you doing in here?" I garbled, reaching dazedly for my pants and jumping into them quickly.

"Sleeping, of course. Well, that's what I'm _here _to do, if you'll shut up."

"What the hell is wrong with your bed?" I snapped, touching my neck, where I felt at least a dozen tiny bruises and hickies blossoming under my skin.

"There's no one in it."

His casual tone pissed me off even more.

"What the hell?" I snarled, not knowing if I should go home or kick him out. "What, do you sleep with someone every fuckin' night?"

"Only when I'm at someone else's place."

Still, I inwardly debated as to whether I should drive my heel down on his neck, or if I should get dressed and leave.

"Anyway," he said as I became stunned in place, a war starting up inside me as to what to do, "get back in bed."

He took me by the wrist and pulled me into bed, whisking the blanket over me.

Now, trust me, inwardly, I was ready to throw him out of the bed like I was some kind of sumo wrestler; I had at least twenty names other than 'Neji' to call him.

But I was stunned.

I don't really know by what, exactly.

By the fact that I thought it was Sasuke.

By the fact that it wasn't Sasuke.

By the fact that it was Neji.

I dunno.

Nothing made sense.

Not the feel of his touch on my face and chest.

Not the smell of his hair, cascading over my face and shoulders.

Not the look in his eyes as he looked me in the eye as steadily as Sasuke ever had.

Not the tearing that the pounding of my heart caused as he leaned down over me.

I watched from a distance as Neji laid his lips over the lips of this stranger.

His eye-lids lowered, his eye lashes creating a lustful canopy over his white eyes.

My heart split and ripped down the middle, fluttering into dozens of pieces of paper; a confetti spilling into me and settling at the bottom of my stomach.

For a paper heart, it was incredibly heavy in my stomach.

His lips touched mine.

A tear slid down my cheek.

He pressed his lips against mine just so slightly.

My eyes blurred as I looked at him as he loved me so sincerely.

_It must be a lie. Something here is a lie . . ._

His eyes, who seemed to adore me so, closed slowly, the same way Sasuke's would when he kissed me: it was like he was falling asleep, so at ease, so comfortable with me.

It was that ease that kept me from making a complete jerk of myself.

And that was why I was with Sasuke.

And that was why we loved so wholly.

And that is why I lost myself in Neji's kiss.

He was brilliant.

I think kissing Itachi might be similar: there was experience in every aspect of his kiss.

He knew how to move his lips and tongue and hands to get just the reaction and to set just the mood that he wanted.

He knew how to call forth any emotion he wanted from the center of me.

And I couldn't stop them.

He was some sort of sorcerer.

Some sore of beast.

Sadness was the only emotion that was wholly mine that still showed.

My tears fell as quickly and as steadily as a never ending rain.

But still, I smiled into his lips and wrapped my arms around him.

I cried because it felt more right than breathing fresh forest air.

I opened my mouth to his prodding tongue and kissed him back.

I cried because it turned me on and made me want more.

I paid rapt attention to his movement, his feel, his taste, his smell.

I cried because he moved like the lioness, stalking her prey, padding soundlessly through the high grass.

I cried because his skin was a quilt-- having sat in the sun for an hour—under my hands.

I cried because it was cute how he tasted like a butter-cracker, and it tasted good.

I cried because the smell of a summer afternoon hung about him like the steam after a shower.

I wrapped my arms around his neck as he kissed my face.

I cried because I loved Sasuke.

"Now go to sleep," he whispered, kissing the corner of my mouth.

I clung to him as he settled under the covers.

He stroked the back of my neck and lapped up my tears as I cried and never stopped.

In the end, I slept.

It was an uneasy, dreamless, empty sleep.

I woke up on a damp pillow, my hair and face damp from my tears.

When I sat up and looked down at Neji, my tears came again.

But this time, they were not rocked and held and sung to by a false happiness.

And no sleep came to stop them, no lips to keep them at bay.

They fell and fell, without pause, as I dressed and left the house.

They fell as I reached first period.

They fell as I walked to the counselor's office.

They fell as I was driven home.

They fell as I stumbled up the steps to Sasuke's door.

For two hours they had been falling at a steady rate, not fast, not slow.

Sasuke opened the door in bewilderment.

"Na-"

I couldn't stand hearing his voice.

I fell forward into his arms.

My tears fell faster than ever.

I couldn't stand the feel of his body.

He held me fast, pressing my face to his chest.

"What happened, Naruto? Are you hurt?"

I couldn't stand his love.

I hated myself for being worthy of his hate.

I hated myself for wanting his love.

I gripped his shirt, sobbing loudly into his shoulder.

"Shh, shh," Sasuke cooed, rocking me back and forth, lowering me slowly until he sat on the door step with me in his lap.

"Sasuke," I bawled, choking and spluttering. "Sasuke."

"Hey, hey, I'm here. Shh," he whispered, almost laughing. He stroked my hair and held me close, rocking from side to side. "Hussshh . . . Shshshh."

He kissed my tears, following them up to the corners of my eyes, kissing the lids of my eyes and the bridge of my nose.

My chest heaved, and the catch in my throat fell away.

My tears fell harder.

"Shhhhh . . . " he whispered melodically. "What is it? What' wrong? Hmm?"

I tried to stop myself from sobbing.

"I do love you," I hiccupped. "I do. I do. I do. I do. I do. I do."

"Sh-sh-shh," Sasuke breathed, hugging me tighter. "I know, I know. I do love you, too. I do."

I smiled.

"O-only you," I said slowly. "Only you."

"Only you," he said in a smiling voice.

"Only you!" I shouted, crying more than ever. "No one but you. No one."

I wrapped my arms around him.

"No one but you," he mumbled into my hair.

We stayed in the same spot until the sun started setting.

I (nestled against Sasuke like a bird under its mama's wing) looked up at Sasuke.

He stared blankly at the setting sun.

I saw white eyes, locks of hair falling over them.

A tear rolled down my cheek.

I loved only Sasuke.

I saw him everywhere.

Even in eyes that lied so obviously.

Sasuke resided there, caught and trapped.

Sasuke would see me in there next time he looked.

He would know.

A piece of me had gotten hooked inside that lying soul.

It tore, and would forever remain a part of Neji.

I loved only Sasuke.

**TBC**

* * *

Oh, yes, I was asked to give a hint towards the sequel, since you all seem pretty happy about that. I gotta say, you guys won't like the sound of it, but, trust me, I know what I'm doing. (I sound so lame.)

Alright, hint no. one:

One of the major characters is moving away.

IT'S SO FUCKING EXCITING. And, as a non-hint, I thought you'd all be glad to hear that I'll be doing each chapter from a different person's perspective (mainly Sasuke and Naruto). Yay.

And, sorry for the wait on the chapter: I really do want to get this story finished, but since we've moved, everything as been a little whack. Blargh. But, on a higher note, I'm getting a kitty. :heart:

(And, still clearly hyped on The Beatles.)


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